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StratusIQ Completes Fiber Build for Gigabit Service to High Forest Ranch

1:53PM February 05, 2020

StratusIQ, the largest local provider of fiber Internet service, announces completion of their latest fiber Internet expansion to the community of High Forest Ranch.   Completion of the fiber build brings Gigabit speed Fiber-to-the-Home Internet service to the subdivision.

The High Forest Ranch Homeowner’s Association (HOA) established a committee and began searching for a better Internet provider in early 2019.  They searched for qualified and interested vendors to install and service Fiber-to-the-Home (FTTH) Internet service to their subdivision.  In June of 2019, the High Forest Ranch HOA Board of Directors unanimously selected StratusIQ as a partner at a special board meeting.   The decision was further ratified by a resident vote on July 9, 2019.  “Our residents were very frustrated with the very poor Internet service in our neighborhood and the previous lack of options for improved service. We are thrilled that StratusIQ has completed the project and we can finally have reliable, high speed Internet connectivity”, stated HOA President Jeanette Bachmann.

Construction activity in the development began in August of 2019 and included over 40,000 feet of Distribution fiber throughout the subdivision.  The project also included construction of over 18,000 feet of Transmission fiber to tie the subdivision into the existing StratusIQ fiber network.  Construction of the Distribution portion was completed in December of 2019 despite above average snowfall for the area in October and November.  The Transmission portion of the fiber build was completed in January of 2020 and Fiber-to-the-Home activations are currently underway.

“This was a large fiber build and we are happy to provide the residents of High Forest Ranch access to the Gigabit Internet service that they have been anxiously waiting for,”  said Sebastian Nutter, Director of Sales and Marketing for StratusIQ,  “We’re also very excited about the launch of our Stratus-phere Smart WIFI Service in coordination with the activation of High Forest Ranch.”  Nutter added.

About High Forest Ranch

High Forest Ranch is a private gated luxury home community located in northern Colorado Springs, Colorado. High Forest Ranch offers beautiful custom home sites from 2.5 to 39 acres. These sites feature towering ponderosa pines and spectacular views of the Rocky Mountain front range.  High Forest Ranch was inspired by the great national parks of the west and features more than 33 acres of greenbelt and open space, 8 miles of trails, 2 stocked fishing ponds, and a grand community lodge (available to residents for private events).   High Forest Ranch is close to award-winning schools (districts #20 and #38), shopping, and the new Club at Flying Horse.  Residents also enjoy easy access to both Colorado Springs and Denver.

For more information about High Forest Ranch please visit

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Captain’s log, stardate 20170611

How to identify the right kind of clients when you’re first starting out...

Sent by Jonathan Stark on June 11th, 2017

Reader John Tseng wrote in to ask about how to identify the right kind of clients when you’re first starting out as a freelancer (shared with permission):

I am really interested in your comment “Even a freshly minted developer can deliver valuable business outcomes ...”. I’m not that freshly minted, anymore, but I am stuck on identifying ideal clients. How would, say, a recent college grad with a CS degree go about figuring out who the right kind of client is?

Thanks for writing in, John!

The list of qualities that constitute an ideal client is different for everyone. It’s not unlike asking what qualities constitute an ideal spouse.

But when you’re just starting out you probably don’t know what qualities you’re looking for. You need to gain experience to figure this out.

But where do you start?

Generally speaking, I would focus on finding clients that are in an industry that appeals to you and are in a position to derive clear benefit from your expertise.

For someone with the skill set of a recent CS grad, I’d probably suggest looking for established small businesses that are non-technical in nature.

By “small” I mean a business that has maybe 10-20 employees and does maybe $2-5 million per year in revenue. Businesses of this size are big enough to have budget for projects and small enough that you can talk directly with the owner.

Here are a few random examples off the top of my head: used bookstores, dental practices, local restaurants, designer clothing boutiques, etc.

I’m just guessing, but I would hypothesize that a decent percentage of these types of business would not be savvy with digital tools and therefore could benefit from even basic digital marketing, inventory management, online ordering/scheduling, accounting integrations, and so on. All things that I presume a recent CS would be capable of delivering.

To validate this hypothesis, you would interview owners of these types of businesses looking for expensive problems or big opportunities that could be addressed with your skill set.

Over time, you would build experience and notoriety in this vertical and could work your way up to bigger (and more valuable) engagements.

P.S. My private mentoring program is launching tomorrow. Qualified participants will be entitled to six months of unlimited 1-on-1 access to me by email, phone, fax, or carrier pigeon. Participation will be limited to a small and exclusive group. The introductory price for the entire six months is $3500.

Based on inquiries so far, I believe it will sell out. If you miss the boat this time around, it’ll be at least six months before you have another opportunity to join. To improve your chances of securing a spot, click here to add your name to the early announcement list -> Yes, add me to the list!

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Another Cryptic Message From The Guerilla Philosopher

Look, another missive from my favorite street artist/philosopher! This one’s a bit dark, innit?

“Every time

I hear the news

that someone has been killed,

I vow to live each day

to the max,

in case I’m next.”

Found this in the same alley where he posted before.

Jonelle Patrick writes novels set in Tokyo

A young woman dressed as a Gothic Lolita is found dead in a car with two strangers. But the more Yumi Hata learns about her friend’s death, the more she’s convinced it was murder…read more

Jonelle Patrick View All

Writing mystery books set in Tokyo is mostly what I do, but I also blog about the odd stuff I see every day in Japan. I'm a graduate of Stanford University and the Sendagaya Japanese Institute in Tokyo, and a member of the International Thriller Writers, the Mystery Writers of America, and Sisters In Crime. When I'm not in Tokyo, I live in San Francisco. I also host a travel site called The Tokyo Guide I Wish I'd Had, so if you're headed to Japan and want to check out the places I take my friends when they're in town, take a look!

2 thoughts on “Another Cryptic Message From The Guerilla Philosopher Leave a comment

    • Yes, although I guess I’ve been in Tokyo too long because I didn’t even consider it might not be a single word street name “secoraba”! Which doesn’t really mean anything in Japanese, unless he wants to be equated with the carafes of sake brought out on festive occasions…o_O

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JS Spectra

JS Spectra - blogging theme template designed in bright colors from the company JoomShaper. Excellent optimization of code, a good download speed and flexible configuration template framework's possible thanks to the studio Helix Framework. The layout in the assembly were installed 8 color schemes, 4 varieties of menus and six and a half dozen module positions. The template is fully supported smatrfonami and tablet devices. According to the developers template is optimized for creating a design portfolio sites or sites own developers, due to the clarity of presentation. In the template in place the best expansion of JoomShaper.

Detailed specifications JS Spectra template:

  • Template running Joomla 3.x;
  • The source code of the template is based on modern web technologies HTML 5 and CSS 3;
  • Powered by popular frameworks Helix Framework;
  • The template supports such popular extensions like K2 and VirtueMart;
  • Full support for RTL language;
  • In the template there are many positions to accommodate modules;
  • Having a quick start (Quickstart) to install the demo data;
  • Supports many popular WYSIWYG editors;
  • Adjustable width module positions for greater comfort;
  • Ability to connect Google fonts;
  • Availability psd source layout template with the ability to edit them;
  • Various materials display layout;
  • Well commented source code php and css files;
  • Template optimized and has instant page loading;
  • Ability to disable the option mainbody on the home page;
  • Full, enhanced support club extensions;
  • Quick and easy parameter setting the template manager management;
  • Compatible with all popular web browsers (Cross-browser compatibility);
  • SEO optimized code template is required for search engine promotion site;
  • The template supports all mobile devices and tablets;
  • There is a private page 404, as well as the site offline;
  • In the template there is a switch styles template;
  • The inclusion of CSS and Javascript compression to speed up the template;
  • There are additional typographic styles;
  • Easy and clean template which has a modern and stylish look;
  • The template can be easily integrated with all major social networks;
  • Checking the validity of the code

Key Features:

Date Relise:
Apr 2012
Date Update:
May 2015
24 Mb
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The invented collective African artist

In a recent issue of Art South Africa, Achille Mbembe articulates on the factors constraining contemporary African culture. Among those factors, he identifies ‘The conflation of African art, culture and aesthetics with ethnicity or community or communalism’:

The dominant but false idea – shared by many Africans and many donors – is that the act of creativity is necessarily a collective act; that African artistic forms are not aesthetic objects per se but ciphers of a deeper level of the ‘real’ that is fundamentally ethnographic and expressive of Africa’s ontological cultural difference of ‘authenticity’. It is this African ‘difference’ and this African ‘authenticity’ donors are keen to find, support and, if necessary, invent.

Achille Mbembe ‘Art and Development’ Art South Africa 8/3 2010 pp.70-74

Spirit in a spear blade – Mande Blacksmiths

Patrick McNaugthon’s study of Mali metalsmithing identified a problem in the applying Western distinction between art and life:

The Mande people of Mali, like some other African peoples, give a name to every kind of sculpture that they produce, and also to categories of objects such as wooden twin figures, dolls, animal masks and headdresses (McNaughton 1988:110f.). These names may be revealing as to an object’s perceived spiritual potency. Some types of objects might not be considered as art by Westerners, as in the case of spear blades and oil-burning lamps. Yet the Mande consider their beauty, symbolism, and place in society to take them beyond simple utility. The distinction between art and artifact (or crafts) is not generally marked in African languages.

Patrick R. McNaughton The Mande Blacksmiths: Knowledge, Power and Art in West Africa Bloomington, IN: Indiana University Press, 1988

The place of African craft: studio or village?

Potters from Nkwalini Valley in KwaZulu-Natal including Masonto

Potters from Nkwalini Valley in KwaZulu-Natal including Masonto

Potters from Nkwalini Valley in KwaZulu-Natal including Masonto. Photo by Steven Smith. Click image for story.

The online theme for 2.3 is the broad relation between African craft cultures and the modern craft movement. To a large degree, the development of modern craft has coincided with the relocation of craft practice from the village to the studio – from cottage industry to the artistic production of unique objects. Does modern African craft follow a similar path? Does the origin of much African craft tradition in collective ritual entail a loss of meaning when an object is transferred into the cold and quiet space of a gallery? Does this limit the capacity for individual African craftspersons to participate in the international craft arena?

For this issue, we invite those working in the field of African craft to share their thoughts on issues special to their area.

Online from Journal of Modern Craft 2.3: Editorial and Handspring Puppet Company by Adrian Kohler, Basil Jones and Tommy Luther


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Debt Service Coverage Ratio: This Is How to Calculate It

Debt Service Coverage Ratio: This Is How to Calculate It

Your DCSR plays a major role in the direction your company will take when dealing with debt. A debt service coverage ratio is one of the first headaches any business owner will deal with. Once you determine DSCR the first time, it is much easier to calculate in later years.

What Is Debt Service Coverage Ratio?

DCSR determines the accurate capability of a company’s ability to repay its debt obligations with the current operating income. It’s easy to talk about, but complicated to get right. No two businesses will have the same evaluation, even if they have identical numbers.

Figuring out the DSCR can get even more complicated when the balance sheet isn’t adjusted correctly. If any of the financial statements are off, then it becomes nearly impossible to get an accurate DSCR. Your assets and liabilities will have a strong impact on the DSCR, so timing is everything. So, if the business is in the middle of a buyout, the additional leverage may favor one company over the other.

Finding the Right Formula

To get the right formula, you’ll need to check the net operating income and total debt servicing. This is the formula that will give you an accurate representation of your obligations. Software options for calculating DSCR differ, all offering their own unique benefits.

The most common is Microsoft Excel. Companies that are already invested in using Microsoft Office products will prefer a DSCR themed Excel sheet. It’s easily shareable, editable and follows the uniform policies of the business.

Smaller companies can always use an online calculator for a more simplified layout. The information can always be exported into the program of your choice. There is less control when using this method, so be wary of depending on an online calculator for complex business practices.

Any actual software specifically meant for DSCR is usually built from the ground up for the company. These specialized scripts and programs are company dependent, and only after getting the blessing of the employee handling the finances.

Optimizing Excel

The easiest way to optimize Excel for DSCR is by using downloadable templates. From that template, edit the formula to suit your company’s needs. Get rid of cells you don’t need, and repurpose titles to match what you care about the most.

Once everything is set up with Excel, it is only a matter of inputting the company numbers. The sheet will do all of the hard work by calculating the DSCR automatically. Being able to plug in the numbers at ease will allow you to do quick comparisons to competitors. These quick side by side comparisons will help both your short term and long-term business growth.

Security of Online Calculators

There are no security issues when using trusted DSCR calculators. No personal information is needed when inputting the numbers. If you run across a website that asks for personal company information, then use an alternative. Never offer up compromising personal information about your company on an unverified website.

Wrap Up

It may seem daunting at first, but DSCR is a simple assessment at its core. Get over this first financial hurdle, and then move on to the next obstacle. Your business depends on forward thinking, and accurate financial information.

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Bolch Judicial Institute
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In the News: EDRM Tackles TAR

EDRM Tackles TAR in Developing New E-Discovery Guidelines

LegalTech News | 9.14.17

A conference at Duke Law School brought together judges, attorneys and technologists to debate potential guidelines and the future of technology assisted review.

by Zach Warren

TAR, also known in its long form as technology assisted review, is nothing new. Some e-discovery practitioners and companies have been selling the concept since the beginning of the decade; the idea of automation in e-discovery has been around even longer. So why isn’t the idea fully catching on?

EDRM believes it knows, and that it has the formula to encourage adoption. The e-discovery standards-setting organization, which became a part of Duke Law School late last year, is in the process of creating TAR guidelines for use by the federal judiciary and both the plaintiffs and defense bar. The guidelines will contain both a general overview of TAR usage and “describe the nuts and bolts of TAR,” according to John Rabiej, director of the Center for Judicial Studies at Duke University.

Read full story on LegalTech News >


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Justice Ginsburg to honor Justice Moseneke during 2020 Bolch Prize ceremony (CANCELLED)

Hon. Ruth Bader Ginsburg

Associate Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg of the U.S. Supreme Court and Chief Justice Margaret H. Marshall (ret.) of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court will speak at the 2020 Bolch Prize ceremony honoring Justice Dikgang Moseneke, the former deputy chief justice of South Africa’s Constitutional Court.

Justice Moseneke will receive the 2020 Bolch Prize for the Rule of Law during the ceremony, in recognition of his lifelong advocacy for justice and human rights and his extraordinary life of service in South Africa. David F. Levi, director of the Bolch Judicial Institute at Duke Law School and a former Chief Judge of the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of California, and Duke Law School Dean Kerry Abrams also will speak at the ceremony, which will be held on April 9 in Washington, D.C (CANCELLED).

The Bolch Prize for the Rule of Law is awarded annually by the Bolch Judicial Institute of Duke Law School to an individual or organization who has demonstrated extraordinary dedication to the rule of law and to advancing rule of law principles around the world. By honoring those who do this work, the Bolch Prize draws attention to the ideals of justice and judicial independence and to the constitutional structures and safeguards that undergird a free society. U.S. Supreme Court Justice Anthony M. Kennedy (ret.) was the inaugural recipient of the award in 2019.

Justice Moseneke is an internationally revered jurist who helped build and lead a post-apartheid, democratic South Africa. He helped draft South Africa’s Interim Constitution and oversaw the nation’s first democratic elections in the post-apartheid era. Over the course of 15 years as a justice and then deputy chief justice of South Africa’s Constitutional Court, Moseneke authored numerous influential opinions that helped clarify and strengthen democratic principles and the separation of powers among the branches of government in South Africa.

Justice Ginsburg is the first U.S. Supreme Court Justice to visit South Africa. She addressed the South African Constitutional Court, on which Justice Moseneke served, in an often-cited talk in Pretoria in 2006.

“Justice Moseneke is a globally respected judge and thinker who has helped us understand that the ideal of the rule of law must be more than a system of rules and adherence to them,” Levi said. “He has articulated an understanding of the rule of law as a legal system that defends individual rights and freedoms, that provides for equal treatment and opportunity, and that in content and spirit advances democratic principles and human dignity. That vision transformed South Africa and offers a shining example of transformation from oppression to liberty.  We are honored to have this opportunity to recognize Justice Moseneke’s extraordinary contributions to the rule of law.”

Attendance at the prize ceremony is by invitation only. The ceremony is open to media coverage, but space is limited. For more information or to reserve a media seat, please contact Melinda Vaughn, associate director of the Bolch Judicial Institute.

About the speakers

Hon. Dikgang Moseneke, Former Deputy Justice, Constitutional Court of South Africa, was born in 1947 in Pretoria. He was arrested at age 15 for opposing apartheid, the state system of institutionalized racial segregation, and sentenced to 10 years in the prison rock quarry of Robben Island, Cape Town, South Africa. His fellow political prisoners included future South African presidents Nelson Mandela and Jacob Zuma. While in prison, Justice Moseneke earned two degrees through a correspondence course with the University of South Africa. He went on to become a leading law practitioner, defending political prisoners and representing corporations. As apartheid ended, Justice Moseneke helped draft South Africa’s Interim Constitution. A year later, in 1994, he served as the deputy chair of the Independent Electoral Commission that oversaw the tense first democratic elections in South Africa. He was appointed to the nation’s High Court in 2001 and elevated to the Constitutional Court in 2002; he became the deputy chief justice in 2005, a position from which he retired in 2016. Justice Moseneke’s legacy as a leader in the law includes jurisprudence on affirmative action, rule of law, separation of powers, socio-economic rights, property, economic justice, and anti-corruption law. He earned the 2018 “Order of Luthuli in Gold,” South Africa’s highest honor, in recognition of his “exceptional contribution to the field of law and the administration of justice.” He holds multiple honorary degrees, has held numerous positions of leadership in business, higher education, government, and law, and is a widely published scholar. He is serving as a Rubenstein Fellow at Duke University during the spring 2020 semester.

Hon. Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Associate Justice, was born in Brooklyn, New York, March 15, 1933. She married Martin D. Ginsburg in 1954, and has a daughter, Jane, and a son, James. She received her B.A. from Cornell University, attended Harvard Law School, and received her LL.B. from Columbia Law School. She served as a law clerk to the Honorable Edmund L. Palmieri, Judge of the United States District Court for the Southern District of New York, from 1959 to 1961. From 1961 to 1963, she was a research associate and then associate director of the Columbia Law School Project on International Procedure. She was a Professor of Law at Rutgers University School of Law from 1963 to 1972, and Columbia Law School from 1972 to 1980, and a fellow at the Center for Advanced Study in the Behavioral Sciences in Stanford, California from 1977 to 1978. In 1971, she co-founded the Women’s Rights Project of the American Civil Liberties Union, and served as the ACLU’s General Counsel from 1973–1980, and on the National Board of Directors from 1974 to 1980. She served on the Board and Executive Committee of the American Bar Foundation from 1979 to 1989, on the Board of Editors of the American Bar Association Journal from 1972 to 1978, and on the Council of the American Law Institute from 1978 to 1993. She was appointed a Judge of the United States Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit in 1980. President Clinton nominated her as an Associate Justice of the Supreme Court, and she took her seat August 10, 1993.

Hon. Margaret H. Marshall (Retired), Chief Justice of the Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court, was born and raised in South Africa and obtained her baccalaureate from the University of the Witwatersrand in Johannesburg. While an undergraduate, she was elected president of the National Union of South African Students, at the time a leading anti-apartheid organization, beginning her life-long work as a human rights advocate. She came to the United States to pursue her graduate studies at Harvard and became a United States citizen in 1978. She completed a master’s degree at Harvard and a J.D. at Yale Law School; practiced law with the Boston firm of Choate, Hall & Stewart; and served as vice president and general counsel of Harvard University before she was named an associate justice of the Supreme Judicial Court of Massachusetts in 1996. In 1999 she became the first woman to serve as chief justice of that court. Chief Justice Marshall has served as president of the United States Conference of Chief Justices and chair of the board of the National Center for State Courts. She is a fellow of the American Philosophical Society, a fellow of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences, and an emeritus member of the council and executive committee of the American Law Institute.

Hon. David F. Levi, director of the Bolch Judicial Institute, is the Levi Family Professor of Law and Judicial Studies at Duke Law School. He was previously the James B. Duke and Benjamin N. Duke Dean of the School of Law, serving from 2007 to 2018. Prior to that appointment, he was the Chief United States District Judge for the Eastern District of California with chambers in Sacramento. He was appointed United States Attorney by President Ronald Reagan in 1986 and a United States district judge by President George H. W. Bush in 1990. A native of Chicago, Levi earned his A.B. in history and literature, magna cum laude, from Harvard College. He entered Harvard’s graduate program in history, specializing in English legal history and serving as a teaching fellow in English history and literature. He graduated Order of the Coif in 1980 from Stanford Law School, where he was also president of the Stanford Law Review. Following graduation, he was a law clerk to Judge Ben C. Duniway of the U.S. Court of Appeals for the Ninth Circuit, and then to Justice Lewis F. Powell, Jr., of the U.S. Supreme Court. He has served as chair of two Judicial Conference committees (the Civil Rules Advisory Committee and the Standing Committee on the Rules of Practice and Procedure) by appointment of the Chief Justice. He has served on the board of directors of Equal Justice Works, as chair of the American Bar Association’s Standing Committee on the American Judicial System, as president of the Ninth Circuit District Judges Association, and as co-chair of the North Carolina Commission on the Administration of Law and Justice. He is an elected fellow of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences and currently serves as president of the American Law Institute (ALI).

Kerry Abrams, the James B. Duke and Benjamin N. Duke Dean of the School of Law and Professor of Law, was appointed dean of Duke Law on July 1, 2018. She teaches courses in immigration, citizenship, and family law, and is well-known for scholarly writing on family-based migration, the legal regulation of immigrant families, the history of immigration law, and constitutional family rights. Prior to her appointment at Duke, she served on the law faculty of the University of Virginia for 13 years, and, more recently, as the University of Virginia’s vice provost for faculty affairs. She is a graduate of Swarthmore College, where she earned a B.A. in English literature with highest honors. She graduated with distinction from Stanford Law School, where she was president of the Moot Court Board and the co-chair of Women of Stanford Law. After law school, she clerked for Judge Stanwood R. Duval Jr. of the U.S. District Court for the Eastern District of Louisiana and practiced as a commercial litigator for several years at the New York City law firm of Patterson, Belknap, Webb & Tyler LLP. She also served as acting assistant professor of lawyering at New York University School of Law, where she taught lawyering skills, including legal research, writing, oral advocacy, mediation, negotiation, and client counseling. She is a member of the New York State Bar and the United States Supreme Court Bar.


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Welcome back to Medieval Monday!  I’m thrilled to have my friend Sherry Ewing here today.  We’re featuring her medieval romance, If My Heart Could See You.

If you’re following my excerpt from Shadow of the Swan, you can find the fourth snippet of Robert and Constance’s first encounter on Sherry’s blog.  Remember to leave a comment there for a chance to win a signed print copy of the book!  Here’s the link: https://www.sherryewing.com/blog

Now, let’s enjoy Sherry’s fourth snippet:

Once again, her hooded head gave no answer whilst she clutched the tartan closer to her, as if it offered the security she stood in need of.

“No? Well, I cannot in all good conscience leave you here to fend for yourself. A name then,” he encouraged, “tell me your name?”

“My n-name?”

Dristan heard her whispered words softly teasing his senses. “Aye, mistress, your name. Surely you have one?”

He stood fascinated as the head of the woman swiveled quickly in his direction. For one brief moment he beheld eyes of violet, reminding him of the heather on the Scottish moors. Still he waited patiently for her answer and yet she provided nothing to give her identity away.

Be sure to leave a comment to be in the running for Sherry’s giveaway – an eCopy of If My Heart Could See You.  A winner will be randomly selected and announced on Medieval Monday, May 6th.

Catch last week’s excerpt here: https://lanemcfarland.com/blog/

Follow her to next week’s blog (March 4th) here: https://www.cathymacraeauthor.com/bits-n-bobs-author-blog

A little more about If My Heart Could See You:

When you’re enemies, does love have a fighting chance?

For Amiria of Berwyck, defeat does not come easily as she watches her home and clan being ripped asunder. When the very enemy who has laid siege to her home demands her fealty, she will do whatever it takes to protect her people including a hastily concocted ruse that quickly begins to unravel. All too soon, she starts to question whether she can forgive herself for betraying those she has sworn to protect.

Dristan of Blackmore, champion knight of King Henry II, has a reputation to uphold as the Devil’s Dragon. After his invading army conquers Berwyck castle, he sets out to manage the newly claimed estate by training its knights in the art of proper defense. At first, everything appears as it should be, or is it? Betrayed by those he believed he could trust, he must first set aside his anger before he can make room in his heart for love.

Together they are tied by an unspoken bond. As they begin to rebuild the land and unite their people, forces beyond their control attempt to tear apart their fragile truce and only time will tell if love will forever bring them together.

Buy the book:

Amazon US: http://amzn.to/1LV1qnk

Barnes & Noble: http://bit.ly/2pNkekK

iBooks: http://bit.ly/1D5NSBw

Kobo: http://bit.ly/1HQzhwH

See you next Monday!


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Archive for March, 2007

Number 1 on Your Hitler Parade

March 30, 2007 Leave a comment

ESPN caught my ear again. The coach of the NY Giants football team, Tom Coughlin, made the mistake of comparing fan opinion of him to Adolf Hitler. This of course, in the current climate, is talk show gold, even on intellectually challenged sports networks.

So, there were Dan Patrick & Keith Olberman, pontificating and pondering the lack of wisdom Coughlin had displayed in using that particular comparison. A comparison which provokes ire amongst even those who have no idea who this Hitler guy is ( was ). They smoothly segued into the actual topic of the segment, the 2007 Major Leage Baseball season, which is why I was tuned in.

Less than a long breath after Hitler chat, Hall of Fame baseball writer, Peter Gammons, was intro-ed by Patrick as the man who once referred to the owner of the New York Yankees as Mao Tse Steinbrenner. Hmmmmmmm. So, let’s see, it’s bad to reference Hitler when one feels hated, after all he was a sociopath. But it’s OK to gloss a German American with a comparison to Mao Tse Tung. I’m guessing this is because Mao for the most part, mostly killed Chinese and/or imprisoned them for having their own thoughts about life.*

The lack of cognition by the majority of humans no longer surprises me. Hey! I’m highly cognitive and I mispeak. I’ve also done it on the radio. We won’t go into that, not because I’m afraid of exposing my own on mic stupidnesses ( please see Recent Posts > ), but because it’s 1) old news 2) I was accurate & 3) Vince & Amy are married now anyhow. BTW Vince’s recent CD is brilliant.

Olberman, who helms a real news program & has a one man vendetta against another newsie, the well known gasbag Bill O’Reilly ( I think it’s an alphabetizing issue ), and is what passes for an intellectual on ESPN. Dan Patrick is , well, Dan Patrick. It’s like pairing Albert Einstein with, well yes, Dan Patrick. Keith phones in for an hour a day, says smart stuff, while Dan, in typical jock sniffer fashion, goofs on him. Then praises him. Then goofs on him some more. This perpetuates the old sports tradition of equating having read a book as earning you the nickname ‘ perfesser.’ If they find out that book has no pictures? they call you a word I can’t use here, because then even I will attract comments!

Back to dictators of the past. Look, everybody is sensitive. We all have hot buttons. Blah blah blah. Words do have power. Not mine, but you know, guys who are NFL coaches. AND guys who ( still ) have radio shows. Still, as a public service, I will provide a few more acceptable comparisons for coaches under fire ( it’s too late for Coughlin & Michael Ray Richardson, I ain’t touching him with a 20 foot Christian Pole!)

If you are a football coach:

‘ fans treat me like OJ Simpson ‘

For a baseball guy:*

‘ fans act as if I’m Barry Bonds ‘* ( Barry should use Jose Canseco unless speaking of himself in the 3rd person )

For basketball:

‘ hey! it’s not like I’m Bobby Knight, ‘

‘ Eh — don’t make me out to be [ insert name of goon du jour here ]’

For those still adamant about using a megalomaniacal mass murdering ruler to match their own unpopularity with: Idi Amin Dada is very in right now. Sorry, Forrest.

*editor’s note: no truth to the rumor Mia Farrow & I are dating. We are just good friends, of people who don’t know each other.

Mouth-odd Acting

March 27, 2007 Leave a comment

I’ve previously mentioned I’ve been criticized. I’ve always been the kind of person who attracts it. When I was a kid, it would happen a lot. Today, I’d like to talk about it some more. . ..

I was 11 and pitching in a Little League game. After one inning, some other kid comes up to me and says: ‘ you stick your tongue out when you pitch.’ Being 11, I immediately became self conscious. I attribute my lack of a Major League baseball career, directly to that moment. This other young feller joined a large group of people whose life was spared because I was a devout pacifist. Also a bit spindly, I admit it.

A few years later, my mouth full of orthodontic appliance, a pal hanging out with me in the school lunchroom, feels free to point out: ‘ you cover your mouth when you laugh.’ I couldn’t win.

Many decades from those treasured memories, I noticed an increasingly creepy trend of young actors using their lips & tongues to emote. I don’t know who started this technique—Stanislipski? Wouldn’t matter, it’s just bad and that’s that. What directors think that works on screen? Is the tongue a phallic symbol when thus employed, especially when done in the company of a hot chick? What do those compressed lips mean? those lolling tongues? AND why? Men–please knock it the fuck off. Women, your comments invited. Thank you.

While I’m at it: those tight frame close ups on TV are so beyond stupid. Do you enjoy that kind of shot? I don’t. Of course, the dialogue in most TV shows is so incredibly insipid, they are probably hoping to distract viewers. ‘ Look Gertie! a giant head! get me a beer.’ AND if one more hack uses the phrase — ‘ Excuse me! ‘ as a reaction line when one character is affronted by another’s question as in ” hey, Morty, WTF are you doing with your tongue?”— I will hunt them down and excuse them with extreme prejudice.

In a related story: does Oprah Winfrey ever take a pic without her mouth wide Open ? You’ll start noticing as of now. The answer will be, hardly ever.

Yes, I am bitter. Obviously, I was ahead of my time, I could’ve been a star. A huge headed, tongue waggling star! #%*@!

Movin’ on Down or How I Learned to Embrace My ESPNnesses

March 25, 2007 1 comment

As a listener to late night radio, I’m familiar with UFO sightings, ghosts and the always popular Bigfoot. So when I see ESPN, first thing I think is: Hey! a whole network devoted to the paranormal. I found the local ESPN station and tuned in, settling back with some coffee for some good old X Files style talk.

After a few segments in which some guys who seemed to be older than college age, drooled all over some other old guy they gushingly called coach, I realized, much to my chagrin, this was NOT the Extra Sensory Perception Network! It was apparently a whole programming day, 7 days a week, dedicated to worshipping athletes and anybody ( part ) attached to them.

I might have skipped the part where the station I was listening to, used to be a place I was previously employed. But my bitterness has almost nothing to do with ESPN per se. It does have quite a bit to do with the kind of personality currently working in sports radio. Let it please the court to note here: I no longer have the energy to take on the rest of talk radio. Sports radio might be an easy target, but it’s a deserving one.

Several years ago during the Presidents Day holiday, I tuned into FOX Sports Radio. There was a host who was reviling Abraham Lincoln as a former slave holder. Now, I admit, I haven’t read every thing on Abe, but I was reasonably sure, whatever else he purportedly did regarding slavery, he never owned any. This was around the time some writer published some historical letters suggesting Lincoln was gay. All in all, Mr. Lincoln was having his worst year since 1865.

That’s when I started to be aware that most sports talk hosts were morons. One of my favorite things they do is add the suffix -ness to any word. Just recently one clown upped the ante. Count ’em: harshnessesses. And if one more doofus says pronounceiation when attempting to pronounce the word pronunciation, I will go Jack Nicholson on his domus dumbass. Good golly Miss Molly, that’s just sheer stupidness!

I know a Bachelor’s degree ain’t what it used to be. You don’t need any more proof that a college education is no indication of smarts, than to know I’ve dated women with doctorates. It’s a pay grade now, just like other career paths, like the military and government. It’s the $ difference between favorite son and redheaded stepchild in the will.

So, an ex-jock with a BA from Notre Dame is the equivalent, well, of another ex-jock with a BA from say, Hooters U. Any day now, the next generation of sports-talk host will be former pro stars who left high school early to sign with the NBA and get huge shoe endorsement deals from Nike. The harshnessesses of their speech and opinions will be scarifying.

I fully expect one day to tune in to a sports talk show and hear the story of how President Lincoln Hayes lll ( post Mod Squad ) made the players free agents while dry cleaning magnate Tom ” Bill O’ Rights ” Jefferson ( he had red hair! ) sexed Weezy and never married her. Their son, Michael Jordan Jefferson however, rose above his traumatic childhood to a lucrative career in hoops and has a Lincoln Continental SUV in every color. AND, like he really needs the extra cake, a talk show in my old time slot.

MY ESPN would’ve seen it comin’! Did I mention stupidness?

ARod v. HRod

March 24, 2007 Leave a comment

Baseball fans of the New York Yankees are waiting. They are foaming at the mouth. They have a player they are daring to prove himself. He was once considered the best player of his generation until he also became the highest paid player.

No prize for guessing, Alex Rodriguez has been written about enough this Spring to kill off half the trees in el Norte & a few slow terabytes of the Gorenet. But it appears to me these fans have confused ARod with Herod. Herod was a Roman governer back before the Holy Land was a tourist trap. It’s easy an easy mistake to make.

That’s because before Christmas was a retail make it or break it sales point, Herod’s court appointed seer warned him that the Messiah was due any day. Herod was a megalomaniac and wasn’t in the mood to be usurped by a Jew on a mission from God. So, jumping the gun on Tony Soprano by 2000 years, HRod orders a hit on all new born kids on his turf. Like all great stories, and all flawed sociopaths, his minions missed one. The one they just happened to miss, and wouldn’t you know it, turns out to be Yeshua ben Yussef aka Jesus Christ ( oh those Romans! )

If only HRod had been cool, maybe waited until he knew who was who, well, who knows what might’ve happened. Would it be a stretch to imagine, maybe suicide bombers would be doctors and lawyers and such? I did say stretch AND maybe.

What does this have to do with baseball and ARod in NYC? Everything. Nothing. Unless you count crucifying. Arod’s first team in the majors was the Seattle Mariners which used to be called the Pilots. Pontius Pilate* anyone? Ba da bing! Play ball.

* NOT the innovator of Pilates

Rock the Juke Box

March 23, 2007 Leave a comment

Not too long ago, based on experience & insight fueled by deep thought, I realized I was a jerk. Not an asshole, a jerk & I demand the distinction. Having said that, I want to know why so many assholes get droit de seigneur, while jerks are relegated to, well, jerking. Admittedly, it is tough to get an obvious asshole to admit they are one, let alone allowing equal rights to a jerk.

I am however, an enlightened jerk, having been exposed to ( as opposed to exposing myself to. . . ) many spiritual paths. Many of these paths were traveled in the dark, which is the way to go. See, if one is looking for enlightenment, too much light at the start can only leave you blinded, causing the seeker to miss as many good parts as if they’d remained in darkness. As the great, late 20th Century philospher Bruce Springsteen wrote: ‘ blinded by the light, cut loose like a deuce, another runner in the night. . ..’

Many a dissertation has risen & fallen on that line. Mainly because the Manfred Mann hit version of the song made ‘ deuce ‘ sound as if the word was ‘ douche. ‘ Frankly, I knew it was deuce, and I wasn’t sure if he was talking carburetors or wild cards. I do know I attended a memorial gathering for a friend who was on the flight which exploded over Lockerbie, Scotland in the late 80’s.

It was a sad occasion, though the guy who died was a globe trotter, who once lived in a cave on one of the Hawaiian Islands & was also on the Price is Right as a contestant. He could also burp at will, really loud. We would miss him. Some asshole took this opportunity to marvel in front of a group of people, how much he was amazed I hadn’t killed myself yet. He then proceeded to critique my sweater, telling me it was a knockoff & he had an original. Up to that point I’d been having a fine talk with a really attractive woman, hoping for some shared sadness sex. I eventually figured that was being too much of a jerk at such an event, so I decided to mingle. Wow, talk about instant karma!

Had I been a tougher, albeit creepier guy, I might’ve invited the asshole to a private, more personal mourning session outside. I apologize for not recalling my witty comeback to his style statement, I only know he threatened me & a real friend, stepped in & got me away before I got clocked at a memorial for wearing a copy of an LL Bean item. Oh yeah, and still being alive.

You might guess correctly, I didn’t get the girl. Then, the first chance I got, I donated the sweater to Goodwill, with a note attached— DON’T WEAR TO MEMORIALS! I waited until it was dark & I went for a walk, wrapped up like a douche. It was during that journey I discovered what deuce meant & why I am a jerk NOT an asshole. All those dropping a deuce to honor that asshole will enter the gates of Paradise. Be sure to check off on the membership card before you go in, your preference for female or male virgins. A lot of people forget to do it.

Hey! I’m a helpful jerk.


text:
Original Problems (page 115)

Original fairy problems published during 2012 will participate in the informal tourney JF-2012

The site is mostly about fairies, but h# and s# are also welcomed for publication! Please send your problems to my e-mail: julia@juliasfairies.com

Go to →List of Problems ; Page 114 ;  Page 116

I’m happy to welcome a new author on the site, well-known French problemist –  Alain Biénabe

No.180 – Pser-h#4 by Alain Biénabe Nice Pser miniature! Also, for now this is the only one original Pser-problem published here! (JV)

Pser: This is the original definition by its inventor, Dan Meinking: A parry series-mover differs from a standard series-mover prior to the last move as follows:

  1. the series-side may give check during the series;
  2. when checked, the idle-side must immediately parry the threat;
  3. a parry-move may be helpful or defensive, depending on the problem-type;
  4. after a check-and-parry, the series-side continues the series.

Every Pser problem combines two stipulations:

Part 1 – Pser, which indicates the special series play with participation of both sides according to the author’s definition;

Part 2 – the kind of problem, according to well known stipulations, which can show direct play (n#, n=, s#, s= r#, r=, etc), help play (h#, h=, h==, etc) or mixed play (hs#, hs=, hs= =, etc).

For more explanations about Pser see IGM Petko A. Petkov article “The Wonderful (new genre) Parry Series

No.180 Alain Biénabe
Pser-h#4        b) Black Rf4         (2+3)
Solutions: (click to show/hide)

The diagrams are made on WinChloe and its Echecs font is used for Logo design

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Shadow Obstacle - Piece 1

Shadow Obstacle - Piece 1

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  • SKU: JC-OC30S1
  • Brand: JumpOrange
  • Type: Obstacle
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The 30 Ft Shadow ObstacleÂ - PC ONEÂ design with multi-purpose keeps your rental competitiveness. Pair with an optional 30 Ft Shadow Obstacle PC Two are ideal for large corporate and community events or rent it out individually for backyard parties, school and church events.Â

Total of 250 ft long to race with all seven obstacles.Â

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text:
The Jurassic Coast has a dazzling variety of walks, landscapes and charming towns and villages to offer as destinations for happy couples. We’ve hand-picked 8 of our top romantic locations where you can cosy up with your loved one, with our incredible World Heritage Site as your backdrop.

Golden Cap

What better place to share a romantic moment than atop the highest point on England’s south coast? The views from here are simply captivating, showing Portland to the east and Beer, Sidmouth and further into Devon to the west.

Make it a perfect date by doing the walk (despite the height of the peak, it is a fairly simple climb) then finishing up with a drink or a meal at The Anchor Inn in Seatown, which sits snuggly alongside Golden Cap’s foot.

The Anchor Inn. A Palmers pub.
The Anchor Inn at Seatown, with Golden Cap in the background.

St Catherine’s Chapel in Abbotsbury makes for an atmospheric day out tinged with a touch of old-school romanticism.

Although in centuries gone by, the chapel was visited by women praying to St Catherine to bring them a husband (more on that here), nowadays it’s the perfect spot for arm-in-arm strolling.

As always on the Jurassic Coast, the views are top-notch, and the chapel is arguably the best location from which to take in Chesil Beach and the Fleet Lagoon. Impress your other half by informing them that the Fleet is an exceptional example of a tombolo (a spit connecting an island to the mainland).

The East Devon town of Sidmouth offers timeless charm to all visitors. Featuring a number of buildings dating to the Regency period (early 19th century), its streets evoke the spirit of that age, bringing to mind Jane Austen and John Keats.

One of the loveliest walks the town has to offer is along the seafront, as pictured here from the sea by our Ambassador Steve Belasco. The distinctive red cliffs date to the Triassic period, over 200 million years ago, when this part of the world was arid desert.

Along with scrawls from lovers and friends, the rocks by the seafront walk feature some very old “trace fossils”. These are little indentations in the rock that are believed to be the remnants of burrows made by Triassic era creatures wanting to escape the desert’s harsh conditions.

Jacob's Ladder and the historic building that now houses the Clock Tower Cafe, Sidmouth. © Steve Belasco -

The lovely village of Kimmeridge in Purbeck has a number of romantic hot-spots. First of all there’s the Bay, which offers fabulous views, a tremendous beach walk, and even the opportunity for snorkelling (pack a wetsuit!). The Wild Seas Centre here has loads of information about the bay’s distinctive marine life.

In the village itself, The Etches Collection Museum offers a mind-boggling trip back in time to the Jurassic period. Highlighting the incredible finds of ace fossil collector Steve Etches, the museum is a perfect date spot for those interested in Earth History and science.

Kayaks in Kimmeridge Bay
Kayaks in Kimmeridge Bay, Purbeck, Dorset. Photo by Steve Belasco -

What better way to treat your loved one that finding them a perfect fossil as a gift? Be sure to check the tide times (nothing kills romance like having to be rescued by the Coastguard) then head to the beach on either side of the village, and search for ammonites, belemnites, crinoids and more to your heart’s content.

If you’d like some expert help, pop in to the Heritage Centre and see if there are any organised fossil walks happening.

Once you’re on the beach, see if you can spot a pyritised ammonite (pictured here). These sparkly treasures are fairly easy to spot, and would make a perfect keepsake for that special person in your life.

Iron pyrites ammonites from Charmouth.

Durdle Door

What better spot to soak up some romantic atmosphere that at one of the Jurassic Coast’s most iconic locations?

Head down early in the morning or towards dusk to beat the crowds, and take in the spectacle of this famous limestone arch. Durdle Door was formed about 25 million years ago as part of the same process that created the Alps.

While Durdle Door stands proudly today, one day it will fall into the sea, as other arches around the world have done (such as the Azure Window in Malta), part of the eternal process of change upon Earth.

Durdle Door, Swyre Head, Bat
Durdle Door as seen from the sea. Photo by Steve Belasco -

Old Harry Rocks

Old Harry Rocks marks the eastern end of the Jurassic Coast and is a wonderful place for romantic strolling and gazing.

The views to the east take in the Isle of Wight, which was connected to Dorset via a land bridge up until the last Ice Age, between 10,000 and 100,000 years ago. Practically last week in geological terms!

Old Harry is easily reached from Studland, which boats a lovely beach and National Trust shop and café (perfect for a Valentine’s gift and cream tea), or from the charming town of Swanage, whose Victorian-era pier is another of the coast’s top romantic spots.

purbeck - old harry rocks
Old Harry Rocks as seen from Ballard Down. Photo © Andy Walker via

Lyme Regis

Follow in the footsteps of the characters from John Fowles’ The French Lieutenant’s Woman with a visit to the famous Cobb at Lyme Regis.

Dating back to the 14th century, the Cobb is one of the UK’s earliest known sea defences. It makes for a dramatic walking location as the waves pound against it and the Jurassic Coast cliffs of Golden Cap and West Bay stretch into the distance. Just be sure to stay clear of the edge!

When you’ve completed your stroll, re-fuel at one of Lyme Regis’ many fantastic independent pubs, cafes and restaurants.

cobb lyme regis
The Cobb, Lyme Regis. © Steve Belasco -


text:
5 Reasons Why Tinder Ruins Women

We lower our expectations – if a guy asks a question we think he’s a keeper. Most guys give one word answers and expect us to keep the conversation going. He actually asked me how my day was?! Definite boyfriend material.
Whilst also raising them – he doesn’t have a sleeve? No beard? He’s not a CEO? Doesn’t wear a 3 piece suit daily and own a pug? Not interested. Who cares if he actually has a decent personality.
We become skittish – we get ‘ghosted’ (for those of you blissfully unaware of this term, it refers to when a guy or girl stops communication with no warning and you don’t hear from
them again) so often that we try to for see the signs of when a guy will suddenly cut contact with us.  Cue a series of frantic thoughts. ‘It’s been 3 hours since he last messaged!’ ‘His last message was briefer than normal.’ ‘He’s been busy all week! Am I going to be ghosted?’
We lower our self esteem – the dating game is an endless worry (at least for women) of wondering who else the guy is spending his time with. We stalk there Instagram’s and Facebook for signs of other girls and never stop comparing ourselves (and finding a way to fall short) to all of them.
We become worse people – for some reason both men and women place a lower level of respect on people they have met online then with people they met in real life. Maybe because that initial bond wasn’t  there but was instead a mutual right swipe. With the ones we aren’t interested in we are ruder, more abrupt and don’t care if it doesn’t materialise into anything as there will always be another waiting at the touch of a swipe.
So call me old fashioned, but I still believe that nothing can beat a relationship that began based on chemistry, conversation and mutual respect for one another.

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I'm a 27 year old single girl in London, blogging about my dating adventures, London culture and my adventures around the world.

41 thoughts on “5 Reasons Why Tinder Ruins Women

  1. Tinder???
    We have so much apps In the USA to help us meet people ..

    But I don’t trust a permanent relationship like this …

    For a little online communication and connection or a little fun.. where no emotional strings attached.. no real expectations is required. No obligations…

    But for those who are seeking … Let’s say love ❤… it does ruin a lot of things

    1. There are definitely lots more apps available in the UK too such as plentyoffish and match.com which are aimed at people looking for more serious relationships, but I think for my age group (around 25) my peers tend to use Tinder.
      I totally agree that if you are looking for fun/no strings its the perfect platform, I just feel that women often fool themselves into thinking they want something casual, when in reality after a while of dating a man they want something more. This is by no means a generalisation, but just something I have observed frequently amongst women of a similar age to me.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. “I just feel that women often fool themselves into thinking they want something casual”

        Truest statement I have read for a while. You won’t find many girls that want something casual. It’s just not in our nature (read about the hormone Oxytocin) However, tell a guy that’s what you want and you’ll become closer?? They’ll want you more?? They’ll eventually fall for you and you’ll be the one to change them??! Being casual is a way to get closer, but majority of the time it never ends that way. I’ve been there… it sucks!

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Glad you agree! Exactly if you tell them you want something casual they will only be made up/want to see you more because they genuinely believe its no strings attached and perfectly suited to what they want – whereas we lull ourselves into thinking we can eventually dazzle them into wanting more!

        Liked by 1 person

  2. Great post. The social value of women has been on a steady decline since the 1960s and garbage like Tinder has only served to speed up the process. Tinder does not benefit anyone looking for a high quality relationship. Women need to demand a higher quality of man again. Step one is dating offline. Real, meaningful conversations with full on romantic value need to happen face to face – not screen to screen.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Well, I’ve never used dating app, but I work in a pub in Westminster so I’ve seen a lot of “tinder dates” and those five points seem pretty accurate to me. It’s refreshing to finally read someone honest enough to disclose this facts.

    Liked by 1 person

      1. Yes I do, I mean you see a lot of things: shy people that really need tinder to meet other people and that’s cute. You see serial daters who are dangerous, you witness dates when both are checking out any boys and girls and that makes you wonder “what’s the point?” But what I see most often are dates that start when both are drunk.
        They spend three hours on their phones, and when the gin kicks in all of sudden they found the love of their life. A few weeks later you see them coming with another date.

        But observing people coming in and out of relationships made me realize one thing:

        Tinder isn’t about beginning love stories. It’s all about going on dates.

        And when you think about it it’s so true because once you’re engaged, they don’t make any money.

        Just like banks want to be indebt forever, tinder wants you to pay your “love-debt” that you own to your heart forever.

        And that’s the trick, many people go there to find love, but all they offer you is a date, and then you have it, but there is still a gap in your heart. It’s true though they never promised people that they’d find love.

        And you get criticised if you are a sensitive person that wants and need more than just “dating”

        Anyways, sorry I’m talkative but I’ve been thinking about it a lot 😅

  4. I did try Tinder out, but I found that it was having a pretty bad psychological effect on me. A few of the problems I had:

    I found myself swiping through the app w/out really thinking about the individual people (even tho I often tried to read profiles).

    I was exposed to a lot of profiles / pics of people I really didn’t like and it made me feel weird, I’m talking indecently dressed, really rude words about men etc.

    In one instance i was quite impressed with a profile and wrote a nice long intro message complimenting what they wrote and asking some more detailed questions, they unmatched me w/out replying, that really made me feel awful? – why did they match me in the first place?

    I guess I am not cut out for the tinder game, my points aren’t criticism on women btw, just the system, I am sure it works both ways.

    So I am trying to avoid online dating now, I feel like it really has a negative impact. I do know some people are happily married from a tinder meeting, but I guess I just don’t want to go through the experience.

    Liked by 3 people

  5. I have had the same experience after being on Tinder and other dating sites. With some many options, how can I know that they are just talking to me and not copying and pasting the same messages? The new dating apps have made dating more stressful and rejection even harder. I have been ghosted quite a few times and unmatched the moment they want a dirtier conversation than I am willing to have. Dating in this generation is hard!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. This is all SO true, though I would argue that Tinder ruins both men and women equally. I run a series on my blog called The Tinder Files where I post conversations I’ve had with guys on Tinder. So many of them need to remember that there’s an actual person on the other end of the rude messages that they’re sending, which speaks to your point that we become worse people.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’ve had a read of that on your blog, it’s crazy some of the things men say. So many of my male friends have openly said they see Tinder like any other mobile app game and so speak to people as if they are not actually ‘real.’

      Liked by 1 person

  7. This is soooo awesome! I totally agree with you. I was on tinder for a little while, and to be honest, it was just for entertainment. And then I realized that I was trying to find love in the wrong places. Thanks for this post! 😊 btw, I’m loving your blog so far!! ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  8. I think by talking about the subject it’s a good first step though. Maybe as online dating evolves and becomes even more of a common thing the same standards will be applied that girls do in real life. Good read, thanks for sharing. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  9. It totally depends on what someone is looking for.. If you are looking for love then it’s a total waste of time. I also don’t wanna date a guy from tinder because I’ll always be wondering if he’s secretly “swiping”. I know some people who have had long term relations after meeting on that app but I’m not interested.. Tinder is a joke to be honest!! It’s too shallow and full of weirdos that I don’t even bother! The worst part also is other dating sites have become ghost towns because everyone is now running to this easy to get laid app called tinder 🙄

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Haha that is so true! When you meet someone in real life you presume they are single and don’t think about who else they are dating whereas with tinder your immediate thoughts are that they probably have 4/5 other girls on he go which isn’t the nicest thought. It’s definitely a shallow way of finding someone compatible!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Exactly. And most profiles are stupid.. They almost all say the same things.. I’m also not sure who lied to men that women want to see bare chests & gym selfies. I don’t even care about 6pack and budging muscles .. The number of shirtless photos on tinder is incredible. Or posing with Tigers/drugged animals, groups of women, or flashy cars that aren’t theirs, posing half naked at the beach or in underwear, posing whilst lying in the bed and so on…. And they all write that they are addicted to travel and the gym.. men are also making the famous duck faces.. Smh 🙄.. Tinder is just designed for shallow people.. I’m sure there are some good people but that’s a needle in a haystack.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. haha I coudn’t agree more! I have seen so many profiles like this. Just yesterday I had to tell a male friend just how much of a turn off it was to see a man’s profile picture where is surrounded by women thinking he it makes him look more attractive. I swear sometimes we are from different planets!

        Liked by 1 person

  10. I guess it really depends on the person and what you’re looking for, but this post is so relatable for me. I ended up deleting Tinder after one and a half months of actively using it, because I felt like I was just wasting my time.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you, I’m glad you could relate! 🙂 It really is dependant on what you are looking for, but I think most women end up hoping they will find something more than a casual affair.

      Liked by 1 person

  11. On a personal note, I was using online dating apps in the past and I just believe it wasn’t healthy. If you have bad social skills, I think using dating apps only makes your social skills worse. I think its better to improve yourself and your social skills; and try to meet a lover in the real world. You cannot really have chemistry with someone you meet online, because you can’t truly know someone unless you meet them in real life. You can’t look into their eyes when you first meet them and get an idea about them, because your just typing data to each other over the net. You make some really good points in your article, and its really great to hear a woman’s perspective about online dating. I agree with you, nothing beats an old fashion meeting between a man and woman, where lightning strikes and there’s instant chemistry (I’ve probably only experienced this twice in my 35 years of being on earth and it never occurred in online dating). I’ll definitely check your blog regularly, its good to hear a woman’s perspective about dating, keep up the good work.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you very much 🙂 I’m glad you like my blog! I’m always interested to hear male perspectives on things too, so will check out your blog. But I agree, I much prefer to meet people in real life than faff around with online apps.

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Terms and Conditions

Welcome to the Justin Case Lip Balm website (the “Website”) Terms and Conditions. These Terms and Conditions govern your use of this Website set out below. By using any part of this Website, completing your customer registration with us, and/or placing an order on the Website, you agree to be bound by the Terms and Conditions.

Use of the Website

About Just In Case Lip Balms

Just In Case Lip Balms is the supplier of the goods and our address: 282 Perrin Rd, Woodstock, CT 06281.

Company registration number: 860-208-7898.

To be eligible to purchase goods on this Website and lawfully enter into and form contracts on this Website under English law, you must:

  1. register to use the Website;
  2. be the holder of a valid debit/credit card.

You warrant that the personal information which you are required to provide when you register as a customer is true, accurate, and current in all respects. If your information changes then please notify us immediately by contacting Customer Services on the contact us page. Alternatively, if you are a registered customer, you can update your details through the “my account” page.

You agree not to impersonate any other person or entity or to use a false name or a name that you are not authorized to use.

This contract shall be concluded in English.

Placing An Order And Order Acceptance

You place your order request for goods from the Website by clicking on the “Confirm Purchase” button at the end of the online ordering process. You will be guided through the process of placing an order by a series of simple instructions on the website.

Once you have placed your order, we will send you an acknowledgment providing you with a payment reference and your order’s value, which has been debited to your Paypal Account, credit or debit card via Stripe. This is not an order confirmation or order acceptance from Just In Case Lip Balms.

Unless we have notified you that we do not accept your order or have canceled your order under the Cancellation Section of the Site, our acceptance of your order and the contract’s completion between you and us will take place when we have dispatched the goods ordered. To cancel your order after it has been dispatched to you, you will need to follow the Returns Policy and Procedures.

Your Account

Using the website, you agree to keep your password and account details confidential and take all reasonable measures to prevent unauthorized access to your account. You are responsible for all actions that occur in relation to your account. If you have a reason to believe that your password has become known to somebody else, or is likely to be used in a way that is unauthorized by you, you should contact us immediately. If you forget your password, we will reset it upon your request and send it to your registered email address. All the personal information that you provide will be held in accordance with the Privacy Policy.

Description Of Products

We will take all reasonable care to ensure that all details, descriptions, and prices of products appearing on the Website are correct at the time when the relevant information was entered on to the system. Although we aim to keep the website as up to date as possible, the information, including product descriptions appearing on the Website at any particular time, may not always reflect the position immediately after you place an order.

Accuracy Of Information

We attempt to be as accurate as possible when describing products on the Website; however, to the extent permitted by law, we do not warrant that the product descriptions, colors or other content available on the Website are accurate, complete, reliable, current, or error-free.

Intellectual Property

All content available on the Website, including, but not limited to, text, graphics, logos, button icons, images, audio clips, data compilations, and software, and the composition thereof (the “Content”) is the property of getting Fresh Cosmetics Ltd t/a Just In Case Lip Balms, our affiliates, our partners or our licensors, and is protected by USA and international copyright laws. The trade marks, logos, and service marks displayed on the Website (collectively, the “Trademarks”) are the registered and unregistered marks of Just In Case Lip Balms, our affiliates, our licensors or our partners.

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We welcome inquiries or feedback on the products you use or might like to purchase; however, our policy is to decline unsolicited suggestions and ideas. Notwithstanding our policy regarding unsolicited ideas and suggestions, any inquiries, feedback, suggestions, ideas, or other information you provide us (collectively, “Submissions”) will be treated as non-proprietary and non-confidential. Subject to the terms of our Privacy Policy, by transmitting any submission, you hereby grant us non-exclusive, royalty-free, transferable, and fully licensable right to use, reproduce, modify, adapt, publish, sell, assign, translate, create derivative works from, distribute, and display. Submission in any form, media, or technology, whether now known or hereafter developed, alone or as part of other works. You also acknowledge that your Submission may not be returned and we may use your Submission, and any ideas, concept or know-how contained therein, for any purpose including, without limitation, developing, manufacturing, distributing and marketing products, look maximum fitness vacaville. If you make a submission, you represent and warrant that that you own or control the rights to your Submission. You further represent and warrant that such Submission does not constitute or contain software viruses, commercial solicitation, chain letters, mass mailings, or any form of “spam”. You may not use a false email address, impersonate any person or entity, or otherwise mislead us as to the origin of any Submission. You agree to indemnify us for all claims arising from your claims to any rights in any Submission.

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The law shall govern your use of this Website and any purchase by you of any goods from Just In Case Lip Balms and the parties hereto submit to the courts’ exclusive jurisdiction.


text:
Contemporary Literature · Young Adult

Eliza and Her Monsters

I’ve been in the mood for some good contemporary YA recently, so I spent a little time browsing in the YA section of my library last week. I didn’t necessarily go in with a plan to get anything in particular (other than the Silvera that I just recently finished/reviewed) – I planned to just see what jumped out. First, let me just say that one of the perks of a small-ish town library is that there is usually not a long wait list for new releases. And on top of that, it meant that this particular browsing trip was incredibly successful. I found like 7 or 8 pretty new and very popular YA titles and it was a struggle to limit myself to just 3. In fact, in retrospect, I am impressed with my own self-restraint. In any case, this was one of the winners…

Eliza and Her Monsters by Francesca Zappia

“Ideas are the asexual reproduction of the mind.”

This is the story of Eliza Mirk – creator of the hugely popular Monstrous Sea web comic (anonymously known at LadyConstellation in the online forums and fandom) and painfully shy and awkward high school senior. Her only two friends (and the only people who know her real identity) are online and she is ok with mediocrely (is that a word?) skating quietly through the last year of school and trying to restart herself in college. But then a new kid comes to school, Wallace. He is a huge MS fan (arguably the biggest one) and they bond over his fanfiction and her “fanart.” Both quiet, they find ways to communicate that make talking more comfortable and Eliza decides that perhaps trying a little more in real life could be worth it. But then something happens, the worst thing happens (in Eliza’s opinion), and her identity as LadyConstellation is leaked. The fallout she faces at school, in her family, with Wallace and, most challengingly, internally, threatens to break her and the world of MS.

There were so many things that I loved about this book. First, how current it is. With the technology of the present day, the omnipresence of the internet, this story really gets to the heart of being young today. There are so many positive sides to this interconnectedness and ready availability of communication, bringing together people that love the same things and providing refuge and support for those that cannot always make that happen in real life. However, there are many downsides as well, like the fact anonymity is so hard to maintain and so easy to lose, the inability to fully block the negative commentary and feedback, etc. And the portrayal of parents who did not grow up with the benefits/downsides of the internet, and are perhaps unable to completely grasp its role (partially because it is a concept nigh on impossible to explain) is spot on. The exploration of mental health and what a deterioration/breakdown looks and feels like was, while short, fairly realistic. And I was happy with the way it was written and how it (and the story overall) ended. Finally, I cannot get over the descriptions and role of Eliza’s brothers. I am also the oldest girl with two younger brothers, and I feel like Zappia nailed it. There were so many times growing up that I felt they were distant from me, as people, or I didn’t really know about them/what mattered to them. And of course they annoyed the crap out of me. But at the same time, and especially now that I’m older and looking back, the role they end up playing when the ball drops on Eliza’s identity is absolutely true and perfect. And it’s the part of the story that made me cry. I read it like 6 times. Love.

As far as writing and presentation, I thought that each of the voices were vibrant and quick and authentic. They were wonderfully geeky and self-conscious and I recognize real people in their cadence and words. I also loved (seriously, loved) the stylistic pieces of this novel. The sections set up like chat room discussions, the written conversations between Eliza and Wallace, the (rough, pre-published) sketches of comic pages, the final version/published pages from MS, the sections of what I assume are Wallace’s fanfiction and transcriptions of the MS story, the forum home page view/comment counts, the ads for MS gear. All of it added a phenomenal extra dimension to the story. I also enjoyed the challenge of working to piece together the characters and storyline of Monstrous Sea, at the same time that I was reading and following the story of our “real life” characters. I thought it was a really creative and layered reading experience.

This is a truly artistic ode to geekiness and fandoms – the family and security they can provide – and those that give them to us. It covers the dark side of these groups as well, in a way that really provides insight into the pressure on the creators, the joint responsibility on the artists and the fans to support each other, and what can happen when they don’t. And it does all that while painting an authentic picture of the unique challenges of being “weird” as a young adult today.

10 thoughts on “Eliza and Her Monsters

    1. Yes! I am not always into YA contemporary/romance, I feel like often they are too juvenile, like the author is writing high schoolers as if they are middle schoolers. You know what I mean? But for some reason I really needed something fast and light and this not only fit the bill, it ended up being one of the best of this sub-genre that I’ve ever read. Perfectly age and situation appropriate. I was so happy about that!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Grrrrr. That’s one of my biggest pet peeves. I also dislike that same issue with relationships – like unless you set things up right with your characters’ personalities (which I do actually think Eliza did, but in general…) stopping relationships at just kissing or something equally PG is really not accurate or reflective of reality for high schoolers. And that super bugs me.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Absolutely! I didn’t mean to make it sound like that was never the case. I just…it needs to be set up/introduced correctly. It’s more when it’s incongruous for the character (based on everything else) that it becomes an issue for me, if that makes sense. And I do feel like that happens a lot.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. I know you didn’t mean to make it sound that way. I long ago realized that the “romantic plot” of my life is in the minority of coming of age tales. So your points are completely valid. I mean, it doesn’t make sense that so many teen protagonists don’t go past small sweet kisses or possibly light makeout sessions.

        Liked by 1 person

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Writers' London: a literary guide

Gardens of Bedford Square, Bloomsbury, London
Group consciousness: Bedford Square, Bloomsbury Credit: Rex

Our capital has not only been home to some of the greatest writers in English literature, but also the setting for many of the most famous books, plays and poems ever written. From recognisable landmarks to more secret hideaways, here are seven spots to celebrate the work of some of the greatest artists in the English language

The British Library

Euston Road

The first stop for any lover of the written word, this enormous temple to literature has not only given a haven for countless writers in order to craft their art, but contains an extraordinary amount of catalogued items – more than any other library in the world, in fact.

Enjoy the calm and serenity of the reading rooms, and take time out to explore the King’s Library – a huge six-storey glass tower containing 65,000 printed volumes, pamphlets, manuscripts and maps collected by George III in the 18th century.

In the John Ritblat Gallery you can also see the original manuscripts of many classics, including Beowulf, Jane Eyre and The Canterbury Tales.

The Pillars of Hercules

Greek Street

There has been a pub on this site since 1733, and it has long been a favoured hangout of thirsty novelists. Former literary enfants terribles Julian Barnes, Martin Amis and Ian McEwan have all propped up the bar here, and Clive James’ collection of literary criticism, At the Pillars of Hercules, was written in a secluded corner of the pub.

Its scholarly heritage extends further back than the 20th century, however – the pub features in Charles Dickens’ novel A Tale of Two Cities.

By the book: British Library Credit: Getty

The genteel, relaxed atmosphere of Bloomsbury’s garden squares was home and a source of inspiration for that influential group of writers, artists and intellectuals of the Twenties and Thirties known as the Bloomsbury Group.

Blue plaques abound – denoting the former residences of Virginia Woolf, Lytton Strachey, John Maynard Keynes and, a hundred years earlier, Percy Bysshe and Mary Shelley.

While you’re in the area, be sure to swing by the Faber & Faber offices – where TS Eliot once worked – in Queen Square.

The French House

Dean Street

Another classic Soho watering hole, this pub retains some of the bohemian atmosphere that made it a favourite of the louche pre and post-war artistic crowd.

Charles de Gaulle penned his famous rallying cry to the French people here while in exile from the Nazis during the Second World War, and it also played host to Dylan Thomas and Brendan Behan – the former, according to legend, once exited the pub in such a drunken state that he left the only handwritten manuscript for his masterpiece, Under Milk Wood, at the bar. Thankfully it was still there, untouched, when he returned the next day.

Platform 9¾

King’s Cross Station

The secret departing point for the Hogwarts Express has been recreated at the bustling international train terminal. Head to the western departures concourse and be sure to have your photo taken complete with (borrowed) Gryffindor scarf and pushing the obligatory trolley (complete with owl cage) through the wall.

There’s a souvenir shop, too, of course.

At a push: tourists get into the Harry Potter spirit at Kings Cross Station Credit: Alamy

Charing Cross Road

The only place to go in the capital if you’re looking to fill your bookshelves, the stretch of the Charing Cross Road from Centrepoint down towards Trafalgar Square is a mecca for all lovers of literature.

Lose yourself for hours in the jumble of rare and secondhand book shops, or else head into the flagship branch of Foyles for a more ordered buying experience.

And afterwards, be sure to grab a coffee in the café – and wonder how many of the earnest young people tapping furiously on their laptops are penning future masterpieces.

Shakespeare’s Globe

You can’t explore literary London without paying a visit to the theatrical home of the greatest writer in the history of the world.

A lovingly reconstructed version of the great man’s Globe theatre, this is a working playhouse, with productions staged throughout the year. It also holds an exhibition providing a fascinating insight into Shakespeare’s life, works, and Elizabethan London as the Bard himself would have experienced it.

Find out more

Visit priceless.com/London and sign up to Priceless London emails.

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text:
Kamlesh Tripathi

Shouldn’t I call them depraved. Transcending even the emperors of Rome, and that to without a throne, who could be ‘vindictive, cruel and even insane’- say some ancient historians like Suetonius, Pliny and Cassius Dio.

A day after a woman doctor became a victim of acid attack. Delhi High Court has expressed concern over the ‘spate of acid attacks.’ So, yet again Nero fiddled while Rome burned? But who is our Nero? Surely, the Government in general, and the law enforcement department in particular, who allowed sale of acid off the shelf.

Establishment is now cracking the whip by developing a web application to regulate the sale of acid, with functionalities like registration of stockists and retailers, issue of licenses by the district administration and limiting sale of acid to individuals who furnish proof of identity and residence.

This may to a certain extent prune down unauthorized sale of acid but won’t sterilize the sick mindset. Union minister Rajnath Singh, also suggests of treating acid attacks, that cause serious hurts, as ‘heinous crimes.’

Good Samaritan NGOs have also held demonstrations at ITO demanding quick and swift Police action against the perpetrators of crime in Rajouri Garden. A medical report released, says the 30 year old doctor is traumatized and understands the prognosis of such a severe injury.

And, in all of this the court has again asked for status report from the centre and the state. But, what is more astonishing is the High Court’s reference to acid attacks, when it pointed out that Delhi Police has almost 15,000 posts vacant and therefore a we have deficient police force at hand.

Lack of adequate Police Force results in inadequate patrolling, which encourages sick minds and criminals to enact such ghastly crime; and the government attorney Sanjay Jain is further exhibiting government apathy by saying 15 proposals forwarded by Delhi Police for creation of over 14,000 posts “shall be looked into at the earliest.” So no matter how heinous is the crime, government lives by its age old rhetoric; and so these sick minds will continue having a field day.

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