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Monday, May 6, 2013

Come see me!

I'm betting most of you originally stumbled upon this blog because of adoption, and not solely because of my sunny disposition, superior intellect and rapier wit, as I would prefer to believe (those latter two, of course, were the reasons you kept coming back, though- right?).

But my blog, like many of yours, didn't remain an "adoption blog" for long.  It was quickly filled with all the other aspects of my life.  I've talked plenty about being a Christian here- and I certainly don't shy away from doing that, as it's the biggest part of my life- but my faith has never been the main focus of this blog.  In fact, it often gets lost in the sea of stories about my kids and family life, my health, my weirdo sense of humor (which is sometimes inappropriate and very unChristian-y), etc., etc.

So... I've (drum roll, please) set up another blog to speak specifically about issues of faith.  Not just faith in general, but my faith and what God is doing in my life lately.  I'm not trying to relegate my Christian beliefs to some dark corner or anything- again, I'm not embarrassed or ashamed to discuss those things here.  It's just that I realize many of you don't come here to be bombarded with my views on Jesus and/or Obama and I want to be sensitive to that.  You come here for the mad-cap hijinks...  Like when I got stuck in a pair of Spanx, or when I peed my pants a little bit while cooking dinner.  And the thought-provoking, intelligent pieces...  Like when I peed my pants a little bit while cooking dinner (the second time).

If you share an interest in matters of Christian faith, you're welcome to visit me at God Calls Me Honey.  I'd love it if you click on over and help me get the ball rollin,'  although I've just started so there's not much to read yet.

You're welcome to join me there whether you share my beliefs or not, of course, but if you're not a Christian?  Be warned-- it's going to be All God, All The Time.  Some political posts are bound to wind up there too, I'm sure. It's often hard to discuss one without the other these days.  You Liberal friends will not like it.  Trust me in this.  So please don't come over there hoping to spark a lively debate.  It's probably (hopefully) not going to be that kind of blog.  If you fear that hearing too much about my faith or politics will change the way you feel about me, don't read it.  Simple as that.

There might be some homeschool-related stuff from time to time, too- since that topic is also closely tied to my faith.  Who knows?  The only thing we can know for sure is that the Spanx catastrophes will remain here.  Do not fear- this blog will stay open so that my faithful readers (both of you) will never have to wonder if I'm trapped somewhere in a sweaty pair of Spanx, about to pee my pants.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

You can pick your friends and you can pick your nose, but...

Friends, I need your help.  And this isn't my usual goofy crap, either.  It can't always be like a day at Chuck E. Cheese around here, you know.  This is serious.  I have a major problem and I desperately need the advice of my mama peeps (Or papa peeps.  I'm no sexist).

Please help me.

You see...  One of my sons is heading down the wrong path.  A dark path.  Some might even call it an evil path.  He is rejecting my teachings of right and wrong and choosing to go his own way.  I'm sincerely at my wit's end and don't know what to do.  I hope you can help me.  And who knows?  Maybe being open and honest about my son's struggles will help someone else, too.

Guys, my son has become a booger-eater.  Jeez, I can barely bring myself to say it.  The shame and disgust I feel...  It's just too much.  How could this happen?  How does a mother successfully raise... however many children I have raised- I forget- who have never once let a booger touch their lips (at least not in front of me), just to have the last kid in the batch completely give himself over to the dark world of booger consumption?

I mean, Good Lord, this kid's getting 3 squares a day plus snacks just by diggin' in his nose.

Please.  I beg you.  Make it stop.  Somebody, anybody...  Just. Make. It. Stop.

It doesn't matter how many times I say:
"Get your finger out of your nose."
"That's yucky, honey.  Let's please not do that."
"I said... Get your finger out of your nose!"
"Please, sweetie. If you've ever loved me, even a little... Get your finger. Out. Of. Your nose.  RIGHT.  NOW."
"Did you see Mommy puke just now?  Do you know why she did that?"

I've even prayed, "Lord Jesus, You turned water into wine.  You calmed stormy seas.  You cast out demons.  Boogers are demonic, are they not, Lord?  Won't you please- oh- please make this child stop ingesting the contents of his nostrils?  Could you make the boogers taste like creamed spinach, or vinegar, or something?  I'll live with the picking, Lord.  I'll never complain again over a simple pick.  I promise.  But the (vurp) eating (vuuurrp... Oh, sorry, Lord)...  I just can't do it.  And P.S., Lord, doesn't the Bible say booger-eating is the unpardonable sin?  ...Because it should.  Amen."

But?  Nothing works.

I've tried, people.  I've appealed to his sense of reason and explained how grosstastically dirty the whole practice is, so he can understand why we shouldn't eat our boogers (Vurp).

Guess what?!  Four-year-old boys don't go so much for the reason, apparently.  Who knew?  I've also tried scare tactics, like telling him he'll never get a girlfriend that way...  That, too, was unsuccessful.  Go figure.

Truthfully, I rarely have time to say much of anything at all.  The kid has the process down, I'll give him credit for that much.  Fingernosemouth, fingernosemouth...  The finger goes from nose to mouth so fast I barely have time to vurp, let alone utter a complaint (A 'vurp,' by the way, for those who may not know, is a fancy burp-vomit combo kind of thing that can occur with the sudden onset of severe nausea.  If you've never experienced one, you are blessed.  And you've clearly never watched a booger-eater extract his prey and pop it into his mouth).  There's barely a pause in the conversation, like he's not even aware he's doing it.  Question: How can you possibly place a booger upon your tongue and not be aware of it?  I mean, honestly.  There's no thought or effort put into it.  No wriggling around for the best one.  Just fingernosemouth and- boom- done, as if the whole thing is on auto-pilot.  It's a sight to behold, I tell ya (If you can stomach it.  Which I cannot).

I don't know if this is one of those times when God thinks He's really, really funny, or what.  Because me and snot?  We don't mix.  No-siree-bob, I don't do snot very well at all.  Even when it's dried, solid and crusty (vurp).

And it's not like I can say, "Spit that out!" Y'know? You cannot un-eat a booger.  What's done is done.  So, what do I do, guys?  Duct-tape his favorite pickin' finger to his side?  Have you lived with a booger-eater?  How did you make it stop?  Share your experience and wisdom, please.  Will he be over this by the time he graduates from high school?  All suggestions are welcome.  HELP ME!

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Fibromyalgia for Dummies

Right on the heels of my last post, when I was all super-Zen and warm-fuzzy about decluttering my life, I was smacked down by The Fibro Flare From Hades.  Oh, how the mighty have fallen (I just totally made up that phrase, but I'm thinking it's going to catch on).

I hurt, guys.  I hurt real bad (said in my Napoleon Dynamite voice...  Does anyone get that reference?), so I've been a little on edge this week.  And last week.  I'm grouchy.  Actually, there is a more colorful word than grouchy to describe me, but I won't say it.  You can toss about your own proper nouns and adjectives as you see fit.

And did I say I hurt?  Real bad?  All I want to do is beat someone with a sockful of nickels.  Is that so wrong?

I'm at my most creative, you know, when I'm grouchy and in pain.  Suffering produces Genius.  I'm like Hemingway that way.  I'm sure you've all compared me to Hemingway many times.

But...  As usual, I chose to set aside an opportunity to create anything remotely close to Genius and blog, instead.  I came up with this little top ten list for all my fibro peeps, or anybody who knows/loves someone living with chronic illness or pain.  This is the product of five years' worth of anger, impatience, frustration and pain.  It may seem whiny and self-serving, but it comes from a genuine desire to help other people in my position (and also to make some of you shut up... but mostly the first thing).  And who knows?  It may benefit us both by keeping one of us from beating the other senseless.

Take a look to determine if any of this applies to you.  If so, know that I still love you ...but I'm adding nickels to the sock as we speak.

10.  "It's probably this weather (/time of the year)."
You say this because your joints (or ears, scalp, back or butt) ache(s) when it rains, I guess.  I'll admit, I'm being harsh and overly sensitive with this one... But it's because I hear this All. The. Time.  And I've reached the end of my patience.  Look, I know you mean no harm, but please stop asking me if it's the *#%$ weather.  It's not.  It's Fibromyalgia.  Google it if you don't know what it is, because I shouldn't have to explain it to you every-flipping-time it rains.  Here. I just Googled it for you.

To be completely fair, there is some evidence that fibro pain can flare with changes in the weather, in some people. But it is not caused by weather changes, and personally, I don't notice any correlation between weather and a flare.

One of these days, I'm going to respond to this with, "Really, Al Roker? Is it the weather? Maybe it's the phase of the moon... Maybe it's planetary alignment... Hey- maybe it's your breath causing me pain right now."  If you are the unlucky soul standing before me on the day this happens, I humbly ask in advance for your forgiveness.

9. "May I count on you to (fill in the blank... teach a Sunday School class, participate in the bake sale or fundraiser next month... whatever)?"

There's nothing wrong with this question, right?  I don't mind being asked to "volunteer" for things.  I LIKE to volunteer for things as I am able, and I WANT to participate in life...  as I am able, BUT...  If you're going to ask, please don't get so bent if I have to respond with: "I'll have to wait and see," "I'll try," or "I'll let you know." I'm NOT being vague, non-committal, or inconsiderate, so don't judge or get frustrated. I'm doing the best I can to accommodate you without making promises I'll have to break later. I'm sorry if that interferes with your planning. It sorta interferes with mine, too.

No matter how much I may want to participate (and I really, really do), saying Yes to anything feels like a lie to me. The only honest answer is "I don't know."  I never know.    Even with my own children, every promise is prefaced with "If I feel good that day, maybe we can..."

Here's the thing...  If you know someone living with chronic pain or illness, that person is living day-by-day.  And that's not by choice.   By all means, invite them to events and encourage them to volunteer or participate.  Just be understanding and don't put pressure on them to commit.
Right: "We're having a pot luck after the meeting.  I'd love for you to come if you're able."
Wrong: "I need to know if you're coming to the pot luck and what you plan to bring."
(Obviously, some events require a firm Yes or No and it's not always possible to take a wait-and-see approach to accommodate one person.  I don't expect you to make special allowances for me.  Just don't be so pissy if I'm not able to commit!  If you must have a firm commitment, ask someone who is able to give one.)

8. "My girlfriend's sister had her some 'o that fibomerralgah... or somethin.  Maybe it was cancer?  She took (fill in the blank... bee pollen, yak dung, cayenne pepper, skunk pee) and she got better."
If we're good friends, I don't mind when you do this.  It shows you care and want to help, and I appreciate that!  But if we're more casually acquainted? Thank you for showing an interest, but...

You must realize that some of the ideas floating around out there are batcrap crazy, right?  And between the prescriptions, natural remedies, and stupid Internet cures scams I've fallen for out of desperation, I've tried quite a few things. I also try to stay current on the research. If I need any other advice, please let me ask you.

Along these lines...  Please do not ask me which meds I've tried or am currently taking (unless we're really close, or you also have fibro and we're comparing notes). That's a pretty personal question. If I want you to know, I'll tell you.

7. "But you're ALWAYS tired!"
Why, yes. Yes, I am. You're quite the discerning one, aren't you?  So astute.  See, there's this thing called fatigue... That's part of it. Chronic fatigue, exhaustion, pain and weakness.   Chronic means it doesn't really stop, so that would be a key word, there.

The problem with this type of remark- aside from the obnoxiousness of stating obvious things- is it's never a mere observation. It's packed with the implication that the fibro peep is not really tired, she is just lazy or making the same old excuse to avoid doing something she doesn't want to do. That's crap.  She really IS that tired.

6. "Do you think some of this might be, ummm... weight-related? I lost 15 lbs and I feel so much better!"
Really, you little snot?  15 pounds?  That's awesome! Congratulations! Do you have fibromyalgia? Oh...  No?  Okay. Then, wait right here. I have something I want to show you. It's in a sock.  You're gonna love it!

5. "I hear exercise helps."
Um... Yes, it supposedly does. I'll make you a deal:
  1. Let me run over your leg with my car. Just one leg. No biggie.
  2. I'll encourage you to jog around the block to see if it helps you feel better.
  3. Afterwards, you will have unlimited permission to tout the benefits of exercise while I'm in unholy pain.
Until then, how about you go for a five mile run... and maybe don't come back?

4. "But you don't LOOK sick!"
Ummm...  Thank you, I guess...???  Is this a compliment, or an accusation?  Are you simultaneously acknowledging the fact that I look awesome, while insinuating you don't believe I'm sick?  Because that's what it sounds like.

Fibro has absolutely nothing to do with appearance. There's no swelling, no oozing (thank God), no redness, no huge, itchy welts.  I can't help it if I'm able to look absolutely fabulous (snort) while I feel like crap.  Maybe I'm great at faking it?  Didja think of that?  Doesn't mean I'm not miserable on the inside.

Sure, some days you can definitely see I'm in pain.  My facial expression, being in the same jammies for days, and walking like Frankenstein's monster are clear indicators that I'm having a bad flare.  BUT, looking "good" does NOT mean I feel good.

While we're on this subject of what, exactly, looks like sickness...

Seeing me at the mall today after I was too sick to attend church or some event yesterday does not mean you caught me in a lie- so put your pistol down, Sheriff.  It means I'm having a good pain day (because every day is a pain day- there are just differing levels of good and bad) and I'm happy for an opportunity to get out of my house and get something accomplished while I have the chance.  Maybe you could try being happy for me, too.  Or maybe just pull that big stick out of your...

Moving on...

3. "I've told you this twice already!" (Or, "You told me this twice, already!")

I'm brain dead, guys.  Chronic pain becomes "louder" than what's going on around you, if that makes sense.  If you have migraines, arthritis, or other pain problems, I'm sure you can relate.  Pain takes up all the space in your head. You get stupid.  Unfortunately, my stupid is long-term.  They call it Fibro Fog. And I hate it. As much as the pain itself.

I used to be halfway smart, you know.  And I had an amazing memory.  Uh-MAY-zing.  Not Marilu-Henner-amazing, but amazing.  You could come by, all apologetic and sheepish over the 20 bucks you thought you owed me, and I'd say, "No. I specifically remember you paid me back already. It was a Tuesday, last April. You were wearing a red and white shirt.  I was playing Def Leppard (cuz I'm awesome). We were standing in my kitchen, talking about the economy, and that reminded you of the $20 you owed me. You took two tens out of your purse.  The purse was black with a silver clasp.  One of the tens was all wrinkled...  'Member that?"

...And now? I sit in the corner and eat paste. Then I blog three different times about the same paste-eating incident.  You could tell me I owe you $20 today, even if you know I don't, and I'd probably say, "Ok... Have you seen my purse? ...Do I own a purse? If I give you these 7 quarters, will that equal $20?"

And you would say, "Sweetie... Those aren't quarters. You're holding 2 Rolaids, 2 strawberry cough drops, and what appears to be the button that once held your pants closed. Did you know you're pants are hanging open?  Quarters are silver, hon. And you'd need two more things to equal 7... But good job! I'll ask Darrell about the $20. Go back to your paste."

2. "Have you thought of talking to somebody?" "Maybe you're depressed?"
Oy... Oy, oy, oy.  I'm adding more nickels. I mean it.  For one thing, the words 'talking to somebody' or 'depressed' are always said in a stage whisper, as if the subject is shameful. For another thing, the 'somebody' to whom you refer is a psychiatric professional, obvs, which is meant to imply my "pain" has an emotional or mental cause, and is not a "real" physical illness.

It's not that I think I hurt. I really, honestly hurt.

Depression is a serious thing- and just as real as fibromyalgia- so I don't mean to discount it. There are some similarities and overlaps between the two conditions. Fibro patients can and do become depressed. Of course they do. Being in pain 24/7 isn't fun. But the pain didn't come from the depression- it's the other way around.

And? I'm honestly not depressed.  So please stop asking me that.  Good Lord, peeps.  Actually, I consider myself to be a pretty happy person.  And considering some of the crap we've gone through in the past few years, that's a rare and unusual thing.  Let me have it.  Quit trying to squash it.

Think about it, guys... I've discussed my pathetic, poverty-stricken state, and the twin I absorbed as a fetus, aka my goiter-sized double chin, aka Chaz Bono- in the same post.   I've told you about marital woes.  And kid troubles.  I may have- during a moment of weakness- mentioned peeing my pants, but we pretend I didn't, so we don't post links to the evidence. I've shared thoughts on my jumblies- as if you'd ever want to hear them- and my Spanx-related fiasco...   These are deeply personal things, peeps.  Things that normal people try to hide.  Do you really think Depression would suddenly cause me to feel shame? That's where I get embarrassed and finally draw the line???  Pffft.

If I suffered from it, I'd probably tell you. Dontcha think?

The judgment and disbelief from morons who took an Intro to Psych class at a community college in 1993 make me depressed. Is there someone I can talk to about that?

1.  Playing "I Can Top That Pain!"
This is the same game women play when they start swapping labor and birth stories.  There's always a scuffle over who takes the prizes for Longest Labor, Hardest Labor, Most Disgusting Tear/Episiotomy, and so on.  Know what I mean?

People love to play this game with fibro, too, making statements like:
  • "Oh, yeah, I had something real similar last year when I (fill in the blank... pulled a muscle/twisted my ankle/whatever).  It was excruciating."
  • "Insomnia? Yeah, I have that, too. I went to sleep at, like, two this morning."
  • "Chronic pain? Tell me about it! Try sitting at a desk all day! Boy, does my back hurt!"
  • "My daughter has arthritis, so she REALLY hurts."

That last comment about the arthritis was made to me (in church!) by a lady with a big smile on her face, after she asked me how I was doing.  I made the mistake of giving her the honest answer that I wasn't feeling very well due to fibro pain.  And she REALLY made me mad.  I wanted to respond (in church!) with, "WTH does that mean?!?  'REALLY' hurt?!?  Are you flippin' kidding me?!"  But I didn't.

It's not a contest, guys!  As a general rule, it's never a good idea to compare your pain to another person's, unless you personally know how their pain feels. It belittles that person's struggle when you compare her pain to something small or temporary, or contrast it with something that "really" hurts. That's insulting and rude. And obnoxious.  And the apex of assiness.

I really do hurt. I promise. I'm not quite devious enough to mastermind this five-year long scheme in which I fabricate an illness or exaggerate pain just to steal the spotlight from your daughter's arthritis.

And... If you think you know what fibro sleep is like... Ya don't. Especially if you confuse the word 'insomnia' with the phrase "night owl." Staying up until 4 a.m. watching TV, then sleeping in until noon is NOT insomnia. It's what I call a solid 8 hours of sleep.  Fibro peeps do not sleep like you do.  There is no comparison.  So if you really want to make it a competition?  You lose.

Listen, I know life isn't all about me.  I know there are other, bigger things going on besides my piddly-a*$ pain problems, but you know what?  It's not all about you, either.  I'm not saying you shouldn't be allowed to talk about your own aches and pains, or constantly be subjected to my litany of complaints.  In fact (in real life, anyway- not on this blog), I try very hard NOT to do that.

But I shouldn't have to "prove" my pain to you or compete over whose pain is worse.  That's all I'm saying.  People with unseen illnesses don't want your sympathy or even need your empathy.  But would a little validation kill ya?

And there you have it.  The main point to take from this is...  People are idiots (Nooo, I'm Kidding!  Sort of). The point is- Just do unto others as you'd have them do unto you (another phrase I just came up with that I believe will catch on).

Be willing to learn more, care more, speak less, give the benefit of the doubt.  Avoid stupidity when you can help it.

Choose compassion.  And avoid the sock.

Sunday, January 6, 2013

How's it going with the New Year's resolutions?  I didn't really make any.  I did, however, jump on the bandwagon of choosing one word to define and direct my goals for this year.

(Before I share it, though, I want to say an early 'Happy Birthday' to my kid...  Happy birthday, Evan! I love you and miss you! Can't wait to have you back home.  Praying that God has some exciting things just around the corner for you and that this year is going to be YOUR year!)

The word I've chosen for 2013 is DECLUTTER.  And that's a doozy of a word.  For me, anyway, it encompasses a-whole-heckuva-lot.

My hopes to declutter in 2013 (if all goes according to plan) will affect every area of my life, not just my home (although that will be a big part of it).  This isn't just a "I'm finally gonna get organized" kind of thing, although I certainly hope that will happen.  It's more of a "I'm gonna achieve peace and contentment if it kills me" kind of thing.

Here are the specifics, in a long, rambly nutshell.

DECLUTTER my home
This will actually be the easiest (although not easy), so I'll start here.  My housemates and I do not need 49 t-shirts that are suitable only for sleeping or cleaning house, or 17 pairs of jeans that no longer fit, so that's where I'll start, with decluttering our closets and drawers.

Ever since getting "sick" (I was diagnosed in 2008), my deep cleaning skills (aw, who are we kidding?  Deep?  Snort!  My cleaning skills, period) have really suffered.  I just don't get down on my hands and knees for anything anymore...  Unless someone drops M&Ms at my feet.  And even then...  It's gotta be a pretty good handful.  So, I'm envisioning something akin to entering a wardrobe and suddenly finding myself in Narnia.  Some of our closets haven't been investigated in a long time and God only knows what I'll find, is what I'm trying to convey.  I don't know if I should expect the process to be tedious, exciting, terrifying, or a combination of all three.

I'll have to remind myself not to feel wasteful when it's time to say goodbye to a "perfectly good" piece of clothing, or fearful that I may get rid of something I'll need in the future.  God will see to my future needs.  But He will not clean out my closets (believe me, I've asked).  Apparently, only I can do that.

I hope to blissfully and thankfully let go of the things that no longer serve us, instead of fearfully clinging to stuff, "just in case."  When I begin to worry that I'm letting go of too much- that I'm really, really going to need these things, I will remind myself of the wise words in Matthew 6:25-34

When I daydream (and I will), that I may someday wriggle my buttocks back into the size 8 jeans I've been hanging onto for 22 years, I will declutter my thinking by reminding myself that if I succeed in becoming a size 8 again (heck, even a 10) that accomplishment will deserve a brand new pair of jeans, not some tired, old, out-of-style pair (...My way-too-small Wonder Woman t shirt is not going anywhere, however. Let's just make that clear right now.  You will not even pry it from my cold, dead fingers, because I will be buried in it... even if it has to be slit up the back to make it fit).

Anyhoo...  The unnecessary, material CRAP in my life- It's all going.  And I hope, by the end of the year, I'll have a whole slew of posts showing my progress.

This is a biggie, because the success of this one will determine the outcome of every other goal I've set.  I want to rid my head of the centuries-old (okay, maybe not that old, but "half-a-century-old" doesn't roll off the tongue), self-destructive patterns of thinking that bring me down every day.

While writing this post, I had the pleasure of reading a post called Drops of Awesome, which was shared on Facebook by a friend. If you didn't see it there, I hope you'll read it here.  Honestly...  If you're prone to beating yourself up the way I do, reading this will be one of those epiphany-inducing, life-changing things.  For me, it was pure serendipity... or not. The timing of it was more like a "God thing," as it so closely reflected the new direction my own thoughts have been taking.

I want to be kinder to myself; cut myself the same amount of slack I'd give you...  Stop looking at myself with a destructive, self-sabotaging throw-the-baby-out-with-the-bath-water mentality that says I'm either perfect, or I absolutely suck.  Cuz guess what?  I'm never, ever perfect.

I hope to focus more on the little, but good things I do- the "drops of awesome"- instead of constantly beating myself up for all the ways I fail each day.

This one doesn't need much chit-chat, does it?  I mean... just that fact that I'm sitting here blogging right now with laundry to be done, or bills to pay tells you I could find more productive ways to spend my time. On the other hand? What would the two of you do without me?

I definitely want to carve out more meaningful time with my kids, though.  Not just homeschool time.  Not time spent together watching tv.  But memory-making, fun, REAL time.

I want to be healthy.  I want more energy.  I also want to be smaller, but mostly, it's the health thing.  I want those things so badly, yet I never achieve them.

I think we've established that I'm a picky, horribly unhealthy eater, right?  Seriously, I'm like a 4 year old.  I'd say at least half the foods offered on healthy meal plans are ones I think of as gross (Fish?  No.  I don't do fish.  Veggies?  Sure.  I love loaded baked potatoes, corn on the cob- covered in butter and salt, or a nice healthy salad... topped with bacon, cheddar cheese and blue cheese dressing.  Legumes and beans?  I'll eat beans in chili, but that's about it.  Hummus?  I don't even know what that is.  Never had it.  Don't want it...  See?  I'm ridiculous).  So, when I do try to "eat healthy?" I get hungry and feel deprived... which becomes overwhelming, depressing and, ultimately, unrealistic.

I know I'll never be healthy if I don't tackle the pickiness problem.  I need to learn to work around it,  or with it- gradually, instead of expecting to change it over night.  This goes back to that idea of throwing the baby out with the bath water.  My approach to eating healthfully (like my approach to everything else) has always been too all or nothing.  I throw out all the junk in the house, eat one "last meal" of good food (like taco pizza followed by chocolate sheet cake or peach cobbler...  You have to really treat yourself the night before you meet your doom, y'know?), then go to bed full, but already feeling sad and deprived over the life I'm leaving behind, and plan to change my entire life beginning at 7:00 the next morning.

It's all about how quickly I can lose a certain number of pounds, instead of being about a sustainable life change.  It boils down to too many radical changes too soon;  too many yucky new foods that I don't know how to prepare.  I'm defeated and eating ice cream by 3:30 pm.  Then, I wait for the next Monday to begin again, because in my all-or-nothing head, diets always start on a Monday, so ultimately every Sunday night becomes a "last meal" night before the "fresh start" on Monday morning.  Is it any wonder I'm fat?

This year, I'm going to focus on feeding myself the way I'd feed a toddler, since I'm so good at behaving like one.  I'm trying to introduce new, healthy foods a little at a time.  Making gradual, positive changes seems so much more doable to me than taking away all the bad foods I love so much.  Right now, for example, I can't imagine a morning that begins without Diet Pepsi. I cannot envision drinking nothing but boring, plain water. Ick. So, for now, I will cling to my beloved DP, but also add a glass or two of water to my day.   I will eat my taco pizza, but with a salad or handful of baby carrots.

This morning, I had a whole grain English muffin for breakfast.  It had butter and jelly on it, but I ate something whole grain for breakfast.  Yay, me!  Usually, I don't eat breakfast at all, and when I do?  It's chocolate.  Progress, people!

It will be about ADDING, not TAKING AWAY.  Drops of Awesome.  Hopefully, by the end of the year, I will have a bucket full of awesome- those bad foods I adore and crave will have been replaced one by one as I learn to make and like healthier choices, and the process will not have seemed so overwhelming and difficult.

DECLUTTER my spirit
I want to rid myself of any activity, thought or thing that detracts from my relationship with God and is unhealthy for my soul.  If my spirit suffers, my relationships with those I love will suffer, and of course, I suffer as well.  I want more time in His Word and spent in prayer.  Easier said than done, but that's the goal.  Also?  Maybe I need to think more carefully about what I spend my time watching and reading.  What area(s) of my life am I still withholding from God?  Maybe I need to look more carefully at the people in my life, which leads me to...

DECLUTTER my peeps
I've already touched on this topic a little in my last couple posts.  I use up way too much time and energy dealing with people who do not add anything positive to my life.  Those days are done (I hope).  I do not wish to become more selfish, but maybe a little more self-focused (in a good way!); just in remembering to consider my own well-being and emotional/spiritual health, along with others' when choosing who and what deserves my time.

DECLUTTER my marriage/other relationships
This does not mean I'm getting a divorce or leaving my family.  Nor am I devising ways (sinister or otherwise) to get rid of family members (heehee).  I'm not even plotting ways to change their behavior.  To me, this means choosing to lay aside my own behaviors that add nothing positive to my relationships.

Do you have anyone in your life with whom you argue?  Do those arguments ever seem to be um...  let's say "redundant," or unproductive?  Do you ever feel as if you've been having the same, dang argument with someone- over and over and over- for years, with no resolution?  Help me out here, guys.  Surely, I can't be the only one, can I?

What's that oft-used saying about the definition of insanity?  Isn't it "doing the same thing over and over, but expecting different results?"  I've thought of that expression quite a bit this last year, since I've pretty much been living it.  Sometimes, it's like I'm in that movie Groundhog Day.  That can start making you feel a little nuts, after a while, guys.  It's not healthy.

When we know certain words, tones, attitudes will only lead to an argument (or all-out, knock-down-drag-out fight) that has no positive solution, what ultimate purpose does it serve?  Arguing for the sake of "fixing" something can be healthy, but, there comes a point...   A point when you know you're not arguing so you can solve or help.  You're arguing so you can hurt.  You're arguing just because that's what you do with this person.  And that can't really even be called an "argument" anymore.  It's bickering.  Petty, obnoxious bickering.

Oftentimes in relationships, it seems we see a storm brewing and steer toward it; we say our well-rehearsed, destructive lines, with feet even more firmly planted in our already deeply held positions, then we walk away no closer to a solution; only more angry, bitter, and frustrated than before.

Lather, rinse, repeat.
I want to be done with that.  I want to feel like I'm moving forward and making progress, not spinning my wheels.  My life is (at least) half over.  Why waste one more day with anger or petty behaviors?  Those things clog and clutter my relationship with God and affect people I love.  Why give any person that kind of power over my life?  I can't make someone else stop hurting me.  But I can respond to hurt differently.  I can't make other people get along with me.  But I can stop actively participating in conversations that have no productive outcome or benefit.

This will be one of the harder goals to put into practice.  It will mean biting my tongue... A LOT...  And I'm not a tongue-biting kind of girl.  I don't know if you've noticed that.  It will mean refusing to take the bait.  It will mean saying I'm wrong when I know I'm right.  It will mean letting the other guy "win."  So what?  If I can live a calmer, happier, more peaceful life, am I not winning, too?

I think the theme of DECLUTTERING will be a frequent one here in this coming year, as I delve into all the areas of my life that need a little trimming.  I hope I'll have heaps of progress to share.

What about you?  Did you choose a word, theme, or goal for the year?  Any words of wisdom to share as we all venture into this new year?  If so, I'd love to hear it!

You know, you all have gotten very quiet and rarely comment.  What gives?  What's the fun in doing all this talking if no one talks back?  Maybe your word for this year should be COMMENT!


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Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Old news, this. Just uploading my Golden Rose from 2011 (P'tit Cadeau, best contemporary romance) so I can paste it into my GLBT Bookshelf pages.

Thursday, September 20, 2012

Halloween Anthology

My 2-volume anthology, Horror, Dark & Lite, will be released by Silver Publishing on October 20th. The 1st volume (Dark) contains 3 novellas, the 2nd (Lite) 4 short stories. Reese Dante finished the covers just yesterday. Aren't they terrific?

Monday, June 25, 2012

"New Lives"

My next novel is scheduled for release by Silver Publishing on August 4th. Reese Dante has made me one of her usual beautiful covers, but this one is, I think, exceptionally beautiful. My latest work is far from your typical romance novel, but it does have a happy ending.

Thursday, May 24, 2012

Les Ardoises, my next novella, comes out on July 21st in Silver Publishing's "Men in Uniform" series.

Félicien works as a waiter at Les Ardoises, a café-bistro in Villefranche-sur-Mer on the French Riviera. When his girlfriend leaves for a two-week visit with her family, he hooks up with Joel, an American in France for a business conference. Félicien has swung that way before and, secure about his sexual identity, thinks he doesn’t risk getting involved with a man as he might with a woman.
As it turns out, Joel will be in town more than just a day or two. He wants more than a one-night stand, and Félicien isn’t one to pass up a couple of days on a yacht with the handsome and sexually talented American. Before long, they’ve been seen together often enough for people to wonder if they’re in a relationship, and Félicien finds himself questioning who he is and what he wants from life.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

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Thursday, July 20, 2017

Still not quite there

My back was so close...I mean, really.  And then, I started last Saturday off as a good day.  Then I sat down to put on shoes, and my back seized up again.  All this time, it was just waiting.  It deceived me.  And now it is blistering hot.  I have been trying to read, but that hasn't been working either.  Hopefully something works out soon.

Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Various stages

I have three projects going, all in various stages.  I knit a doily, and now am crocheting one.

I started a unicorn modification of a horse pattern for the Princess.

I am still working on my Boxy sweater.  Maybe by the time cold weather hits, it will be done.

There are still more socks, sweaters and toys waiting in the wings.

I am trying to work with what I have, and use up some of my stash.  When you focus on what is right in front of you, you become very aware of your blessings.  There are lots of things I wish I had (a larger vehicle, our own house, a huge budget for yarn), but I am grateful for what I do have.  What are you grateful for?

Thursday, July 06, 2017

Not even halfway

I picked up the second sock again.

I have been distracted by doilies.  I find them typically quick, although needing a lot of concentration.  The directions are generally different for each round when crocheting them, so you must pay attention and read the directions.  Sometimes more than once.   In the one I am currently working on, the directions were not making sense, even though I now think the author wrote them as clear as they could.  The end of one round had a ch 1, dc in top of first sc from beg of the round, which created the last loop of the round.  In this loop, you were to put 2 sc.  When I first read (and re-read) these instructions, it did not make sense to me.  Fortunately, even at 9:30 at night, you can find help with things.  I posted the directions online that were giving me trouble, and within 20 minutes, it became crystal clear.

I am still attempting to work through the Master Crocheter's course, but my projects stop me.  I will pick it up again once I am through with the doily and this sock.  Other projects waiting include a puppy and unicorn, and more Christmas presents.

Wednesday, July 05, 2017

Little things

A little fall complicates big things.  But having to lie flat on your back can give you an opportunity to do some things.

I made a knitted doily.  I also finally put together the dragon.  I completed a sock, and am still working on the second one.

I am starting another doily, but this time it is crocheted.  I have not done one before, because my tension never worked out.  This time, it is.  I think it is a matter of working with something familiar.  I have started working with smaller yarn and smaller needles, and it helps keep the tension.

It has been a while since I posted, mainly because of pain.  Pain has hindered a lot of my summer plans.  I have tried to keep moving forward slowly, but even slow hurts.


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четвъртък, 29 ноември 2012 г.

Biograph Theater

Chicago theater thought to be haunted by the ghost of bank robber John Dillinger. The Biograph Theater is located on the north side of town and gained fame when Dillinger was gunned down near the alley outside on July 22, 1934. Dillinger (1903–1934) enjoyed a spectacular career as a robber, earning him the title of the fi rst Public Enemy Number One (a title also shared by ALPHONSE CAPONE). Born in Indianapolis in 1902, he started his crime life at a young age, when he linked with the Dirty Dozen gang and stole coal from the Pennsylvania Railroad. In 1924, Dillinger’s professional crime life began with the attempted robbery and assault of a grocer. He served nine years in prison in Mooresville, Indiana, and was released in 1933. His time in jail was well spent, for he got to know many bank robbers who later became his accomplices. Once out of prison, Dillinger became a robber in earnest, moving from city to city. In the space of 11 months, he robbed between 10 and 20 banks, plus police arsenals. He seemed to be a magic escape artist, evading traps set for him, and once even escaping from jail armed with a phony wooden gun. He murdered 10 men and wounded many more. A $10,000 reward was offered for him, dead or alive. Dillinger hid at the home of his waitress girlfriend, Polly Hamilton. He was betrayed by Anne Sage (real name Anne Cumpanis), Hamilton’s roommate. Sage was in danger of being deported and struck a deal with the federal government to inform on Dillinger in exchange for staying in the United States. The fateful night came on July 22, 1934, when Dillinger took Sage and Hamilton to the Biograph Theater to see Manhattan Melodrama, starring Clark Gable. Dillinger was well dressed and wearing a straw hat. Melvin Purvis, the head of the FBI in Chicago, set up a trap. Sage would identify herself by wearing a red dress (actually orange).When Dillinger exited the theater at 10:40 P.M. with the two women, one in a reddish dress, Purvis signaled his waiting agents to draw their guns. He identifi ed himself to Dillinger and ordered him to surrender. Dillinger turned and fl ed toward an alley. FBI agents fi red on him. Two bullets hit his left side and one entered his back and exited through his right eye, tearing it to bits. Dillinger was killed instantly and collapsed just short of the alley. He was rushed to Alexian Brothers Hospital, even though he was already dead. Sage, who became known as the “Lady in Red,” was paid $5,000 by the federal government for her part—but was deported anyway. According to lore, instant souvenir hunters dabbed handkerchiefs in Dillinger’s blood at the scene, before his body was whisked away to the hospital. Others hunted for bullet fragments. Since that violent night, passersby have reported seeing glimpses of a ghostly replay of the killing. A blue-gray silhouette of a man is seen leaving the theater, running toward the alley, falling, hitting the pavement, and then disappearing. A ghostly fi gure also is seen hovering near the spot where Dillinger fell dead. The alley is known as “Dillinger’s Alley.” The Biograph has gained a reputation for being haunted too; visitors can sit in the same seat once occupied by Dillinger on the last night of his life. Popular lore persists that the man killed that night was not Dillinger, but a small-time criminal. Dillinger himself is said to have gotten away and lived out his life under a new identity. Little evidence exists to support the belief, which seems to be rooted in a common romanticism that denies the deaths of famous—and infamous—fi gures.

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Saturday, March 20, 2010

Currently reading Vol 3 of Boku Kara. Waiting for Vol 4. : ) Chapt 13 is quite good. Hotaru finally confessed her love for Kousuke! XD

Yukako dashed out from the forest and told Haruna-Sensei and Hotaru that Kosuke was stabbed by a band of robbers!

Hotaru worried for Kousuke, dashed into the forest not considering her own safety. She found him. He told her to leave as the robbers are still in the vicinity...

Hotaru, overcame with emotions, hugged Kousuke and expressed her relief to be able to see him again...

Still overwhelmed, she expressed her frustration of not being able to be with him alone, Kousuke asked the reason for her wanting to be alone with him (sigh... Kou-kun, u r a cruel man). Blushing, she confessed her love. X D (so sweet...)

Enjoy the kiss.

Well the rest of the chapters in Vol 3 frustrate me. I was hoping I could enjoy their budding romance but Kousuke's ex-girlfriend turned up and cast doubt and confusion. Lots of silly misunderstanding. I wanted to strangle someone. Well let's hope Vol 4 will be better.


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Thursday, May 3, 2012

Walking with Sam

My friend, Gwen, is out of town.  She's on her way to Texas, where she will go on a two day, 153 mile bicycle ride, to raise money for the National Multiple Sclerosis Society.  While she's gone, I'm taking care of her house and pets.  One of her dogs is a golden retriever, named Samantha, "Sam" for short, but I usually call her "Sammy Roo".  Don't ask me why, because I don't know.  I just always have.  She doesn't mind, and even seems to like it, as evidenced by the wagging tail when I call her that.

Miss Samantha, ready to go on a nice, long walk.

Sam is the sweetest girl ever, and I love to take her for walks.  Today, we left her house, walked to the town cemetery, walked all around there, then back to her house.  The walk was wonderful, the weather exactly right for a long walk, but the neatest thing was the distance; exactly two miles!  I know this because I was wearing a GPS watch that keeps track of my walking distance.  I've ever managed an exact mileage before, so that was fun.  Another fun factoid, for me anyway, is that part way through today's walk, the watch started beeping at me.  I thought I'd done something wrong, but, no.  It was beeping to let me know that it had reached a total distance of 100 miles!  Now before you get all excited and feel too proud of me, most of those miles belong to my husband.  He's a runner, and the watch is really his, but he sweetly lets me borrow it.  Sammy Roo was absolutely jubilant about being part of the 100 miles reached!  Ok, maybe she was jubilant because I sounded happy as I told her about it, and she got some extra scratches behind the ears out of the deal...

Perfect day, a perfect walk, with a perfect companion dog.  Doesn't get much better than that!

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Friday, December 24, 2010

Setting A Trend...

Enjoy the Carols By Candlelight performances that were so remarkable they became a trending topic on Twitter  - Anthony Callea opens the evening with 'O Come All Ye Faithful, and stops the show with a stunning rendition of 'Don't Save It All For Christmas Day

to quote his partner - Tim Campbell   "Sorry, has to be said - effing brilliant smile.gif smile.gif smile.gif Goosebumps!! "

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01698 535392

Pharmaceutical Validation

Autoclave Validation

Anville Instruments provide two types of validation test sets; one using the Anville Series 825 data logger and the other with the Tecnosoft SterilProbe high temperature data logger.

The EaziVal test set includes the series 825 data logger, validation software, thermocouple probes, pressure transducer, thermocouple entry gland, dry-block temperature bath, temperature reference thermometer and pressure calibrator; supplied in a sturdy, foam-lined case with wheels and extendable handle.

The SterilProbe test set includes five data loggers, logger interface and SPD software; supplied in a sturdy, foam-lined case.

Everything is included except the laptop computer.

EaziVal series 825 test set

This test set comprises of the following:

1x Anville series 825 thermal validation interface

1x Anville EaziVal SE software

1x Ashcroft KXDHT pressure transducer

16x Anville thermocouple sensors

1x Anville thermocouple entry gland

1x Anville series 275 temperature reference

1x Anville series 300 temperature bath

1x Ashcroft PDTG3089-CP916 calibrator

1x Carry case

SterilProbe test set

This set comprises of the following:

5x SterilProbe data loggers

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1x Disk Interface

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EaziVal operator training

Although EaziVal is simple and intuitive operator training is important. Users of the EaziVal system can be trained at the Eastwood Park Training Centre in Falfield. Please note that operator training is not included as part of the test set.


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May 4, 2011

Yesterday I did 2 walks…both over a mile each…in fact the morning one was 1.6 miles….know while this doesn’t sound a lot to most people this is like walking up Fuji for me carrying a whole regiments backpack/rucksacks

G says come on lets go for lunch…so off we head, G orders soup….now I have ordered a drink I don’t need another one as well…because soup is just a hot drink right…I know unless I have a loaf of bread with that soup I am going to absolutely starving within an hour….So I look at the menu again and think hummmm so I settled on a kids portion of cottage pie with steamed veggies….It was perfect actually…when it came out I thought Oh that’s it?!? It was a good size actually with these two long green things as part of the steamed veggies...So I look at the broccoli and cauliflower and think ok normal, what the heck are these…So I picked one up, waved it in the direction of one of my ‘word for friends’ opponents and was like what the hell is this…Lady fingers she said…actually when covered with cottage pie they were very nice nice…they tasted of cottage pie so no problem!

So while waiting for Mrs. H do my 2nd walk I turned my neck to the right and heard a horrible noise, turned my head to the left and the same horrible noise, like paper crunching is the only way to describe it. Put my neck up and down no noise…just looked stupid!
So out comes the smart phone for my own online diagnoses…seems nothing really wrong just bumpy something or others….I called a place that speaks English who had no idea what it could be because I have no pain..So ok!!!

J came home yesterday with a migraine, I had received a message beforehand so knew to expect this. So when he walked through the door I could see straight away it was not good. (Poor kid can’t lie to me even if he wanted to with those eyes) He lay on the sofa ,was a sleep in 5 minutes, woke up took a tablet/pill was sick and went straight back to sleep…poor kid never even made it to dinner.

Spoke with Yeti Moo yesterday which is always lovely. Just remembered I never emailed here what I was meant to…ok shall be doing that right after I post this post…..
It’s amazing what you remember at the strangest of times, things from years and years ago.
I have been having the strangest flash backs about the silliest things….just for what seems like no reason. I was remembering something I had bought for my Nan one Christmas….no idea why this came into my head yesterday as I am not Christmas shopping….
Like know I suddenly remembered that book I want to write….guess how much I have written down since I mentioned it…Nothing….I mean I find it hard enough at times to write on here…no mind a book…
The life and times of WelshWendy the Expat….who had trouble identifying certain veggies including aladies finger….Dont think even the great, great, great grandkids will even want to read it when it is uncovered under a pile of 90’s clothes…..

I am sat here moving my neck from side to side hoping the paper crunching sound has gone….If I move my head like a horse slightly down a fraction, then come up in a slow swooping motion it seems less of a sound…..I mean ANY NEED?

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Romero Brings His Dead to New York City in Comic Book Form

Empire of the Dead romeroIt was a matter of time before Romero’s zombies hit the Big Apple.  They started off on a small farm in Rural Pennsylvania, then invaded the Monroeville Mall (also in Pennsylvania), and then made their way to the Florida Everglades.  Now he’s coming to New York City in a 15-issues miniseries from Marvel comics titled, EMPIRE OF THE DEAD … debuting in January 2014!!  Why comic book form, you may ask.  SImple:

“I could never afford to shoot [in NYC],” Romero, 73, says with a laugh.

Pretty practical!!  What can we expect from EMPIRE OF THE DEAD?

It’s still the major metropolis everybody knows but a few years into its zombie apocalypse. Some things have reverted to a prior state — there are sheep grazing in Central Park’s Sheep Meadow. Yet there are strong social and political elements: The mayor is one of the main characters and a female member of the living dead starts to show some real smarts.

Bub, the 1st "intelligent zombie" in 1985s DAY OF THE DEAD.

Bub, the 1st “intelligent zombie” in 1985s DAY OF THE DEAD.

So it looks as though Romero is going to further explore the idea of intelligent zombies that he began in 1985 with Bub in DAY OF THE DEAD and explored a little more in 2005s LAND OF THE DEAD with the zombie character, Big Daddy.  I’ve said many times before that I’m really not a fan of the “intelligent zombie” in Romero’s world.  I didn’t mind Bub mainly because that was something different.  But the idea that zombies can be civilized and taught to behave and live side by side with uninfected humans just doesn’t do anything for me (obviously this could have huge social and political themes for Romero).  Romero also promises that there there will be a big twist in EMPIRE OF THE DEAD that will reverberate throughout all his zombie films.  I’m thinking we’re finally gonna get the cause and origin of the zombie virus/outbreak.

Romero originally wrote a 300 page EMPIRE OF THE DEAD script but soon realized that no studio would finance the large budget that’d be required to film it, so he brought the idea to Marvel.  Marvel jumped on it.  According to, one of the main themes in the miniseries will be, could zombies coexist with humans if the undead became more intelligent?

Empire of the Dead romero2

“These zombies are starting to show sparks of real care and concern for each other,” Romero says. “I’m not going to go all the way to Omega Man where they take over the world, but I’m having a lot of fun with it. We’ve got some new rules and new characters, and we’re taking it in a completely different direction.”

“It’s basically Chicago or Detroit. The city isn’t destroyed, but it’s just running on its engine, corrupt and no holds barred. It’s a little bit like the Old West,” says Romero, a lifelong fan of comics.

“That’s what I’m talking about now. There’s hardly any morality anywhere, except of course for our heroes.”

I’m definitely excited to see where Romero takes this story considering he doesn’t have the constraints of budgets.  What do you think?  Are you into seeing where the man who single-handedly created the zombie genre takes it?

Stay Bloody!!!

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One Response to Romero Brings His Dead to New York City in Comic Book Form

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Ind e-Pen XL: Drafting Roughly

The Ind e-Pen

And as of this week we are exactly three-quarters of the way through with the year. Yey, everybody!

I couldn’t have done it without you! That’s right. I couldn’t have grown older without you… you

youth-stealing sociopaths. Grr. I’m going to go eat some cereal and listen to NPR for a while now.

Draft, draft, draft
So it turns out there might soon be a draft. Soon is subjective, of course. Because there won’t,

coincidentally, be a vote on it until after election day. You’ve gotta love congress.
The bill is called HR 163 in the House and S 89 IS in the senate, but don’t bother looking it up as

that. Though every other bill can be found by its number, for some reason you have to enter the entire

title of the bill in the Senate’s search engine to find it ( the Universal National

Service Act.
I have a copy of the bill, but instead of summing it up, I’ll let Congressman Pete Stark (D-CA) do it

for me: “This bill requires all young Americans – men and women between 18 and 26 – to perform a two

year period of national service in a military or civilian capacity as determined by the President. For

those who conscientiously object to war, the bill assures that any military service would not include

combat. Otherwise, there would be no preferences, no deferments, no chance for the well-off or the well-

connected to dodge military service for their country, as did our President.”
Strong words there for a guy who supports an act that will force all college-age Americans to do all

of the work. Notice how the age limit for being a senator is 30 and for being a representative is 25?
Anyway, I’ve been unable to find any soon to be elected officials that have any position (either way)

on the draft. It seems as if everyone is staying away from it on purpose. Hmm… now why would anyone

do that?
More later.

15 Topics I cannot cover because of impending reader mutiny:
The cereal wars I have with my mother while shopping
My poetry (“rub-a-dub dub…”)
common household objects
My unhealthy sexual attraction to common household objects (esp. when it’s not my house)
My secret wish that Nelly would do a song with Nelly Furtado.
Ethical Dilemmas and Paradoxes in extremely relatable situations
How I’m hoping I can get addicted to the game of Risk again.
That NMSU’s college paper, the Round Up ( has consistently gone over its budget the

past three years. This year by $48,307.20
How readers are the laziest mutiniers of all time
How Butt has always and will always be wrong about everything in life
How good it feels to be a gangsta
How I hate writing Top 15 lists

A Small Quiz:

Congratulations to Butt. I thought I was almost through with sending you free issues, but then you

answered again. Screw you, Butt. Screw you in the orifice of your choice, Butt.

This Week:

1: Are you FOR or AGAINST being drafted? (This only applies if you or someone you know is going to be

between 18 and 26 and planning on living in the United States until the end of ‘terror’)
2: If you were a gangsta, how would it feel?
3: Are you feeling mutinous?

About Pixel

Pixel Q. Styx refuses to talk about himself. If thou wishest, thou may infer from his blog what thou wishest.
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11 Responses to Ind e-Pen XL: Drafting Roughly

  1. Mr. Miguel says:

    that’s scary about the draft…but i could always register as a coward. i mean conscientious objector. no, i mean coward.
    1. i plan on dodging the draft while lying on the sunny beaches of mazatlan. now where’s my birth of certificate that says i was born in juarez?
    2. damn it feels good to be a gansta, and i wanna kick the crap out of a copy machine
    3. mutiny is the new black

  2. butt says:

    HAHAHA…..Butt wins again! Get used to it people.

    1: I am impartial to the draft. If drafted then I’d go. I’d be a little scared but so be it.
    2: Like a mushroom cloud laying mother fucker.
    3: Only againts your emails.

  3. T-Rob says:

    1. I don’t agree with the draft. We don’t need it. I mean, if we were being invaded by some country like Russia. Yeah, I would fight for my country. But I would never go to another country to help some spoiled president kick the ass of the man that owned on my father. I’d shoot myself in the foot to avoid going over.

    2. I would act white yo, because ya’ll know I act black as a white man. Shit yo, I already have a kick ass name. T-Rob, that’s soooooo gangsta!

    3 “Don’t question authority, they don’t know either.”

  4. Liquid Fox says:

    1 if I got drafted, I would go. However, upon my returned, I would personal make it my life to kill everyone who was responsible for the implementing my departure.
    2 could I still kill?
    3 yes

  5. Mad Hatter says:

    1: Are you FOR or AGAINST being drafted? (This only applies if you or someone you know is going to be between 18 and 26 and planning on living in the United States until the end of ‘terror’)
    Completely against it as far as the army goes, but artisticly, it is the only way to get a good finish.

    2: If you were a gangsta, how would it feel?

    3: Are you feeling mutinous?
    I’ve never been a mutant in all my life. What have they told you? :::suspicious smirk:::

  6. Jessy Salinas says:

    1.Hell No I’m not for the fucking draft. Fuck that. NONONONONONONO. I’n not going anywhere!
    2.If you want to know about being a gangsta I’ll tell you some things. There was this time when i was in the seventh grade and i was in a drive by. Crazy huh?
    3.yea I think so.

  7. Jessy Salinas says:

    Who is this crazy fool Butt and why do you always talk smack about him?

  8. butt says:

    I am Butt. Any questions?

  9. Kris Kiehne says:

    You little psycho. 😉

  10. releasedchild says:

    that crazy fool butt:

  11. butt says:

    hahah simply amazing

Comments are closed.


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Saturday, March 16, 2013

Totally Awesome Applique Book

Today (National Quilting Day) I have had no time for sewing, but did manage to put in a few hours reading through my newest quilting book: "Simply Successful Applique" by Jeanne Sullivan.
That crazy complicated block on the cover? Instructions for making it inside!
I ordered this book online after being very impressed by the positive review Michelle at the Quilting Gallery gave it. I was intrigued because one of my sewing goals this year is to do some hand applique, which I have yet to really try (I took a class once but never finished my sampler project that I started in it). I have a few different applique books, but most just cover the basics and are more of "here is a really simple project"which is great, but I want to do cool stuff like Baltimore blocks! I actually aspirationally bought some American Album patterns (CA and AK) a few months ago, my goal this year is to do one of them.

Now I was planning on just flying by the seat of my pants for this intricate hand applique that I don't know how to do, but this book solves that by going beyond basics and into the nitty gritty of how to do Baltimore-style tiny pieces. It assumes you know nothing about applique and in painstaking detail goes through every step of the applique process. Seriously, painstaking detail.  I should definitely be able to mimic these stitches by following Jeanne's meticulous instructions.

Forgive my awful book photography. This shows  step-by-step photos  of how to stuff mini berries for a trapunto look.
Check out the thought that went into adding an example like this...really impressive.
And detailed stitch guides for many common shapes...
Jeanne goes even beyond the basic, into some really cool details like making a teeny tiny trapunto ladybug. And then to top off this tome of knowledge, she includes a cd of 9 really detailed and intricate patterns! Like, seriously intricate. And not just the patterns, but instructions and tips for each one! I am seriously over the moon. My boyfriend has had to sit through me showing him all of the best parts of the book (look at this!! and this!! That's a DIME next to that teeny tiny leaf!!) because I am just that excited.  In fact, I am so excited that I am writing an entire post about lol.

In other news, I am still chugging along on my mystery quilt tomorrow!

Here is a project list I have made for myself, mostly for my own purposes of keeping track:

In Progress:

  1. Mystery quilt - I will probably just finish the top and give it to my guild. I'm enjoying working on it but am not invested enough to actually buy backing, batting, binding and go through the whole quilting process on it.  Although the solid fabrics could show off some very pretty fmq...hmmm...
  2. Layer cake bargello- I am excited about this one! But it might go into the ufo pile because I just sort of started it on a whim and it's not that important.

  1. Charity wholecloth. I should get on this, it's hogging a lot of space in my sewing corner
  2. QAYG block of the month blocks.  This is kind of in progress, but I am not super psyched about it so it will probably become a UFO
  3. Quilted Jacket - I want to work on this thing to get it finished and out of my life. I am mighty close, if I don't quilt it (which I probably should...arrrrrg....)
  4. Stairway to cat heaven #2 - the person who commissioned it disappeared off the face of the planet so I have slightly lost steam.

Not Yet Started:

  1. Baby quilt. I have a tentative pattern picked, no fabric chosen yet though.
  2. Hand applique projects! I should probably do something simple before I tackle my American Album blocks...
  3. Quilters Wallet - I bought this pattern a while ago and all the supplies for it, so I just need to sit down and do it.

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