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Wednesday, October 31, 2012

*** The shop (and blog) is on a little hiatus while I endure enjoy the mother of all colds. Purchases and custom orders may still be placed as usual (I have already shipped all orders prior to today): Ready-to-ship goodies are, well, ready to ship; please allow an extra week for the making of made-to-order goodies. Thank you so much, and have a super lovely rest of the week! ***

Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Sunday, October 28, 2012

not quite screamfest

I thought I'd share a couple of movie recommendations -- just in time for Halloween! Be warned though, they're not run-of-the-mill Scream/Poltergeist fare; you sort of have to watch closely and pay attention haha..

So, first up -- From Time to Time. This haunting British film is set in the 1940s, and is about a 13-year-old boy who uncovers long-buried family secrets when he goes to stay with his grandmother. The cinematography is beautiful, and the story both charming and poignant -- something the whole family (well, 8 and above maybe) can watch together by firelight.

(In a moment of sorrowful candour, Maggie Smith's character Mrs Oldknow tells her grandson, "If you have children, don't ever quarrel with them. No matter the reason, no matter how angry you get -- don't quarrel. I promise you -- it's never worth it". Like I said, poignant).

Next -- another British film, this time called Haunted. Set in the late 1920s, the story is about an American professor who gets invited to Edbrook House to investigate the alleged hauntings there. While the storyline is mildly cliched, the cinematography is gorgeous, as are Aidan Quinn's brilliant blue eyes. Be advised though, there are some adult themes and a bit of nudity too, so keep it 18-and-up please!

For goodness' sakes, don't watch this bit in its entirety. I couldn't embed part 1, so just copy and paste this video's title in the YouTube search box, and change the number to 1/11.

What ghostly films do you recommend this All Hallows' Eve? :)

Friday, October 26, 2012

on nurturing nature

Mother and Child, by Gustav Klimt

So, my dear cousin has been listening to these psychology lectures in his car; the other day, he comes in and tells me, "Parents actually have very little influence on how their children turn out -- it's just in the genes". He tells me this with great confidence, presumably because Dr So-and-so said it, which somehow gives it "scientific" credence.

Now, we've had these discussions on psychology before; I'd done it in university, and had previously told him quite frankly that it was fine for some generalisations, but really that's all it is -- generalisations. I don't feel that there's that same objectivity and universality with psychology as there is with say, chemistry or physics. Trying to create principles that apply to all individuals and groups is, to me, impossible; humans are just too complex and diverse, as are their personal lives, experiences, beliefs, circumstances. And really, how many people could one possibly study, and for how long?

This idea that genes may be what influence personality and that parents don't really matter, came into prominence when a certain Judith Rich Harris published her book, The Nurture Assumption, some 14 years ago, in which, summarily speaking, she claims that parental influence is minor; whatever our peers do to us outweigh, in the long run, whatever our parents do (Ms Harris, by the way, was a textbook writer, with no doctorate or academic affiliation).

"[Harris] looks at studies which claim to show the influence of the parental environment and claims that most fail to control for genetic influences. For example, if aggressive parents are more likely to have aggressive children, this is not necessarily evidence of parental example".

Further, "Harris' most innovative idea was to look outside the family and to point at the peer group as an important shaper of the child's psyche" (I do not find this an especially profound or groundbreaking idea). However, "contrary to some reports, Harris did not claim that 'parents don't matter'. The book did not cover cases of abuse and neglect. Harris pointed out that parents have a role in selecting their children's peer group, especially in the early years. Parents also affect the child's behavior within the home environment and the interpersonal relationship between child and parent" (extracted from Wiki).

Dr Frank Farley of Temple University eloquently put into words what my immediate thoughts on all this was, namely that "she's taking an extreme position based on a limited set of data. Her thesis is absurd on its face, but consider what might happen if parents believe this stuff!"

Dr Wendy Williams, a professor at Cornell, said, "There are many, many good studies that show parents affect how children turn out in both cognitive abilities and behaviour" (extracted from Wiki, italics mine).

Naturally, however, there are supporters of Ms Harris' great insights, as there are critics. What I wonder is, with all the glaring, physical evidence of the effects of child neglect and abuse, why does anyone even want to propound something that goes against all the noblest principles of parenting at its best, and that has the potential to further encourage parenting at its worst?

While I do not discount the effects of a child's innate qualities on his or her personality, I do not accept that it's these inborn, genetic factors that determine how that child will turn out, or that they outweigh the importance of loving, nurturing, responsible parenting. Child neglect and abuse are on the rise, and without fail, parental personality and behaviour are cited as one of the major risk factors. To suggest that those neglected or abused children would turn out crappily even if their parents were nurturing and responsible, simply because they're inherently crappy people, is profoundly annoying to me.

However, it seems that Ms Harris "rejected the idea that her book would encourage parents to neglect or mistreat their children. She maintains that parents will continue to treat their children well 'for the same reason you are nice to your friends and your partner, even though you have no hopes of molding their character' (extracted from Wiki).

Well, I don't know about you, but I do not "treat my children well" for the same reason I'm nice to my friends. I do not feel responsible for my friends' behaviour and morals, for their sense of self-worth, and for the values, habits and attitudes with which they will live their lives and which they will pass on to their children.

Of course, I can't help vaguely wondering about Ms Harris' own kids, or the kids of those who support her views. Ms Harris, at any rate, has two children, one of whom was adopted. The biological child, Nomi, was, according to Ms Harris, quiet and well-behaved; she was, apparently, just like her biological parents, and "gave us no trouble while she was growing up".

The adopted child Elaine, on the other hand, was different. "She always wanted to be with people. We started getting bad reports from the school right away -- that she wouldn't sit in her chair, and she was bothering other kids... As the girls got older, Nomi became a brain and Elaine became a dropout. Nomi was a member of a very small clique of intellectual kids, and Elaine was a member of the delinquent subgroup".

When you have a parent who describes you like that, you have to wonder if it truly was because you were a genetically hopeless case, or because, having intrinsically different -- but not necessarily bad -- traits, your parent just didn't spend the time and effort needed to develop your talents and abilities to the full.

There was a study known as the Colorado Adoption Project, in which, for a mere seven years, researchers "followed" the lives of 245 adopted children, giving them and their adoptive parents personality and intelligence tests at regular intervals. The conclusion they reached from this supposedly vast, all-encompassing study was that "the only reason we are like our parents is that we share their genes".

Besides the fact that I believe all psychological studies are limited and subjective, I don't believe good parenting is about making our children similar to ourselves -- indeed, it is often hoped that they don't become like us -- it is about harnessing their innate qualities and turning them to positive, productive account. That is why I think good, present parenting does matter.

While one child may be innately shy and the other gregarious, as a parent I am responsible for instilling the right values and attitudes in both of them, sound principles and beliefs that will then dictate their behaviour, and which are not so weak as to be squashed by any peer pressure they may encounter.

Obviously, peers do have an impact on one's life, but I believe the degree of that impact is dependent on the amount of time they spend with those peers, and the fundamental value system they've acquired at home. In fact, I believe it is those values they learn at home that are what will influence the peers they choose to interact with.

For me personally, I can honestly say that the kind of person I was as a child and am now, is almost entirely due to how I was treated at home, the behaviours I saw, and the words I heard. My peers growing up had, in fact, very little influence over me then, and certainly none at all now. I have known and witnessed enough of the effects of parental nurturing and attention, as well as cruelty and neglect, in both my own life and the lives of my relatives and friends, to know how valuable responsible, accessible parenting is -- it is what greatly influenced my decision to give up my corporate career in favour of full-time motherhood.

"Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it" (Prov 22:6).

If you've ever done psychology in school, or ever read a paper on some theory, how often did you think, "Well, that sure didn't apply to me" or "That wasn't what happened in my niece's case, or my son's case, or my neighbour's kid's case"? There simply are no universal behavioural laws, and I find it irresponsible to propound theories that ultimately have no positive purpose.

Instead, they serve to bolster the views of people like my cousin and his friends who happily leave their kids in the care of maids and strangers all day, every day (interestingly, I recall a study done in 2011 by scientists from the US and Netherlands which found that "genes may contribute to a child's bad behaviour, but only when parents are distant; parental monitoring -- how well a parent knows what’s going on in their child’s life -- was key").

I found this person's response to an article on Ms Harris that appeared in Scientific American particularly eloquent: "There is no substitute for good parenting. I am a teacher and see this every day. If you see a problem student, 99% of the time, you have to look no farther than the parent... who does not value education, who is working too many hours to know or care what there kids are doing, who is mentally or physically abusive, who is dependent on alcohol or drugs, or who suffers from some type of mental illness.

"I am amazed at what our kids have to overcome everyday. I am also a parent of two honor students. My college student has won multiple scholarships. Who do you credit for that? Her teachers? They deserve some credit for their knowledge of subject matter....BUT it is the YEARS that I have spent raising them to value education, spending precious time with them, and pushing them to always do their best.

"The most promising students are those who benefit from the combination of GOOD parenting and GOOD teaching. They will choose their peers based upon shared values, and they will have the strength of character to speak their own mind. The old saying "birds of a feather, flock together" is very true.

"Kids who are raised in similar homes, suffer similar problems, and will group together to find some sort of "home away from home" feeling of comfort and safety. Its hard to be a member of an intelligent and successful peer group, when you cannot relate to any of the experiences that they have had. This article and the author of this book is a joke. Sadly it will be used by irresponsible parents to bolster their own irresponsible attitudes of denying any responsibility for the fate of their own offspring".

Tuesday, October 23, 2012

A new movie, with a very dear friend of Inky the Octopus!

tweedy shop4a
This is Tweedy, our eight-legged star! Tweedy is a charming little fellow made entirely of heathered black wool yarn. He loves reading, and looking at the stars, and well, obviously he loves lounging about on things as well. Tweedy would make a dear companion, as well as an adorable addition to a nursery or bookshelf. He's perfect for Halloween too!

tweedy shop6a
Tweedy is in the shop now, looking for a loving home with lots of toast and tinned pineapple. Who knows, he might make another film in the meantime haha!

Saturday, October 20, 2012

I was greatly saddened this morning to hear the sound of chainsaws outside my home. At first I'd thought it was just some pruning of the trees by the road, but looking out my windows, I saw that it was in fact the beginnings of the complete destruction of the last parcels of forest that once carpeted this entire estate.

These trees have been here since I was a child; they used to grow so thickly together that you could barely make out what was beyond the first few rows. The whole place would be alive with the sounds of birds and frogs and crickets and numerous other animals scurrying secretly within the foliage. Everywhere it was a deep, deep green, and the air would be so cool and smell so clean.

And now, the incalculable greed of developers and investors has bulldozed its cruel way in. I had in fact written to a certain minister with regard to this, not once, but thrice; almost needless to say, I did not even receive a token letter of acknowledgment.

For those of you who are so blessed to live surrounded by nature in all its life and splendour and beauty -- relish and delight yourselves in it, be daily thankful for it, do all you can to preserve it.

I'd taken these photos when it first became obvious that even this last patch of forest had been condemned. I felt we simply had to have some record of what it looked like. I didn't want my kids to forget.

This picture kinda captures what it's all about.

When I was a child, there used to be a tiny village in the midst of all this jungle; the people had little thatch-roofed homes, and raised their own chickens. I used, in fact, to play with a boy who lived there, a little ragamuffin who never spoke. They all disappeared when the land was taken for the construction of block after block of apartments.

Ro is still too young to fully grasp that what we'd just walked through would all be gone. As it turned out, it was in fact our last walk through there; the very next day, they started boarding it up.

Thursday, October 18, 2012

grown-up Tabby

adult tabby1 blog
The Tabby satchel in a grown-up size! This particular satchel was made for a sweet young lady in Illinois.

adult tabby4
It's sized a good 11x10", and holds a great many things, including a fat copy of Jonathan Strange and Mr Norrell. There's an inner pocket as well for easy access to keys and pens and cellphone and such. This particular satchel had an adorable teapot pocket. You can get your own customisable satchel here :)

Thursday, October 11, 2012

And -- more stop motion experimentation! This was 255 frames for about four minutes of film -- very effortful lol. I've certainly learned a few things from this experience. For one thing, a tripod is definitely handy; I used one for the first time ever to do this (yeah, I did Inky with one hand haha).

I also realised quickly enough that a tiny digital camera which cleverly switches itself off every few seconds is not helpful. Plus if, like me, you're using a computer that's at least 10 years old -- save, save, save; at every turn, and at every moment. Trust me, you do not want to have worked on a hundred frames and then have to start all over again. I guess people who do this seriously for a living have to have fairly sophisticated equipment -- plus a team of assistants.

In any case, B wanted me to do a movie with her Sylvanians, and I decided to make it educational for her; and, well, it's about time those Sylvanians do some work around here!

Blessed weekend everyone :)

Monday, October 8, 2012

More movie experimentation! This was 38 frames for just 24 seconds of film -- effortful! I've read that it takes an average 1,440 frames to make one minute of film -- you just have to marvel at the people who do entire movies.

Inky 046a
But here is Inky, the star of the show! Inky is a sweet little fellow made entirely of black yarn. He loves reading, and listening to dinner conversations, and well, obviously he loves lounging about on things as well. Inky would make a charming companion, as well as an adorable addition to a nursery or bookshelf. He's perfect for Halloween too!

Inky 045a
Inky is in the shop now, though I must admit to feeling greatly tempted to keep him. Perhaps for more exciting films haha!
See you soon!

treasury clipping

Golden Child, by L.W. Hooks, maker of adorable custom crochet goodies. The entire list is here.

Saturday, October 6, 2012

Ooh, I don't know which I'm more excited about -- this awesome book Ro borrowed from the library, or the fact that I just learnt to make a tiny mini-movie! With sound!

Anyone who knows me knows what a technophobe I am, so humble and unsophisticated as this little filmlet may be, it's a gigantically huge achievement for me haha.. I'd actually just filmed the book, but then I couldn't help feeling it would be much, much nicer with music. And it was, which just confirms how very important a movie's score is!

As for the book, it's Waddle, by Rufus Butler Seder. It uses Scanimation, a six-phase animation process, which was created by Seder. Going through the book, you feel a curious "antiquated" sensation, as if you were viewing the images through a Victorian kinetoscope. Seder has several titles in this series; check one out at your local library today!

Have a dreamy, creative weekend everyone :)

* Wonderfully, despite the fact that hordes of other people use and upload the same piece of music on Youtube with no problem, my video had to be the one that gets blocked in certain countries. I'd originally used a recording of me playing Comptine D'un Autre Ete, but have now replaced it with Carly Comando, a distinctly better musician haha.. Thanks to everyone who let me know they couldn't play the original video :)

Friday, October 5, 2012

say :D

guard blog8
Ro was asked to be in this advertising campaign for a major pharmaceutical chain here, and I let her, for the experience. I didn't realise till now how large this chain actually is; it is apparently the largest here, with at least 140 outlets scattered across the island. So it has certainly been interesting to see Ro's face almost everywhere we go -- in malls and magazines and newspapers, on the trains, and even the bus.

guard blog4
The pretend mom was in her early 20s, about half my age haha.. However, we did all agree that the pretend grandma does look rather like my mother-in-law lol. They have these things literally everywhere in the pharmacies; even gigantic ones hanging from the ceiling. The first time Ro went in and saw them, she squealed, "There are so many mes!!"

guard blog6
Look! Only $8.90!

guard blog3a
One prerequisite I have about the kids doing these things is -- no make-up! I hate seeing children looking all mature and done up, and worse, striking sultry, alluring poses (no child beauty pageants please!). The other thing is -- school has to come first. B isn't doing so much of these things now that she's in grade school. Ro is still in nursery, so I'm ok with it once in awhile (needless to say, she has become a sort of mini-celebrity at her kindergarten haha..). Well, I'm glad she and her sister have had these experiences; I should like them to be a lot more self-assured than their mother ever was!

Monday, October 1, 2012

Real Cats

cat mont

It's the Bikbik & Roro kitties looking like Real Cats! OK, well, until I can think of a better name for these fellows, that's what they're going to be. While I was making 25 of them as party favours, B came along and said, "Oh, it's Tabby Cat, but looking real". And so I decided to call them Real Cats. Anyway, I think they're sweet no matter what they're called, don't you?

grey cat shop2

I decided to put a couple in the shop, including an all-black one in honour of Halloween! The pins are original illustrations on heavyweight paper, mounted on illustration board, and protected by several layers of varnish. Every Real Cat pin is hand-drawn and hand-cut, making each one a unique work of art. They're adorable and retro and rustic all at the same time. Wear one, or several together to create your own special clowder!

ro shop3

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Vilano Aluminium Road Bike 21 Speed (Black, 54cm)

£180.00 (as of February 23, 2018, 4:00 am)

Vilano Aluminium Road Bike 21 Speed (Black, 54cm)

£180.00 (as of February 23, 2018, 4:00 am)

Aluminium Frame Road Commuter Bike 21 Speed Shimano Components 700c
Shimano A050 Thumb Shifters
Forged Alloy Crank Set 50/40/30

Usually dispatched within 24 hours

Category:  .

Product Description

ORDER BEFORE WEDNESDAY LUNCHTIME (12.00) TO GET FOR XMAS The Aluminium Highway Motorbike / Commuter Motorbike Shimano 21 Velocity 700c is a no nonsense Highway Motorbike, best for the experience to paintings, or a handy guide a rough travel round the town or for an individual taking a look to get into cycling. This bicycle is straightforward on the pocket, and simple on the Highway! Unfastened pedals are Incorporated with this elementary Highway Motorbike.

* 21 Speeds facilitated through the Shimano A050 Thumb Rear Listed 7-Velocity and Entrance Friction three-Velocity Shifters.
* Mount Issues on the Body for a Rear Rack and Water Bottle.
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* City Commuter Saddle.
* 700c Double Walled Alloy Wheels.

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Cycle Situation : New. This Motorbike is sent ninety% assembled in a sealed field. Inflation of tyres, installing of pedals, stem, handlebars, Entrance wheel, saddle and seatpost are vital. Gears and brakes would possibly require a few adjustment previous to driving. Wheels are pc trued on the manufacturing facility however those can, hardly, move out in transit and want retruing. There are movies for any setup problems you might have at http://bitly.com/Vilanovideolibrary

Aluminium Body Highway Commuter Motorbike 21 Velocity Shimano Elements 700c
Shimano A050 Thumb Shifters
Cast Alloy Crank Set 50/forty/30
Alloy Caliper Brakes
Unfastened Platform Pedals Incorporated **Motorbike Calls for Assembly**

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February 17, 2016

'Bolt cutters' is not, in fact, one word

What to do when a man approaches you pushing a bike with one hand and wielding bolt cutters in the other?

Seattle's Scott Gamble opted to give the "crackhead" (Gamble's word) $20 for the Trek 620 in question, hoping he'd be able to reunite the bike with its rightful owner.

Gamble's Craigslist ad—which cautions would-be bike claimers that they'll have to furnish details to convince him of their legitimacy—has yet to bring the owner forward, however.

So is the late-80s model Trek in fact "not a special bike" as KIRO 7's Gary Horcher had the cheek to suggest in the station's segment on Gamble's action? Here's hoping that whoever has tuned, cared for, and tooled around the Emerald City on this ride connects with Gamble soon.

One of my favorite parts of this story, oddly, is the correction appended to Gamble's ad. Apparently he first wrote "bolt cutters" as one word and was informed—by someone trolling Craigslist??—of his error. "However 'crackhead' according to merriam-webster.com is a single word meaning 'A person who smokes the illegal drug crack,'" writes Gamble, "so I hit that one out of the park. Go me."

Go you indeed.

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Bikini Dare
Free Videos and Pictures from BikiniDare

Paris in an outdoor bikini photoshoot

Take a look at and see this sexy blonde posing on the beach with a very revealing swimsuit.This week we have a treat, a very hot girl named Paris came in for what she said to be a one time photo shoot. She wore a white crisscross bikini swimsuit that made her look simply amazingly sexy. And she seems to be aware of that fact, proudly parading her sexy curves for the camera. we watched her walking down the beach exposing her amazing body and taking photos of her in every angle. She exposed her sexy round ass and flashed her boobs for us. Then she ran into the water and her suit got completely wet. Her nipples got hard and we could see them poking through the see trough whit fabric.

We want to bring her back, so hopefully she will accept to pose for us again, because she’s been so amazing and she is so gorgeous. It would be a waste not to have her back. She got so many fans already who would give anything to see this sexy blonde flashing her pussy and tits in sexy bikini again. Come back next time and check out new babes in hot bikinis.

paris wearing crotchless sexy bikini

Check out Paris wearing crotchless criss-cross Bikini!


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What’s Happening this Spring

Coming up this week: Last week of the 4 X 4 Challenge. Let’s finish strong everyone.

New Schedule begins on Monday, April 10. (We’ve been practicing the 60 minute class and it’s terrific!)

Lecture on CHAKRAS, the internal energetic environment that determines your presence. The Lecture will be given by Wendy Wilson.
Open to everyone and Free of Charge.
Details TBA.

Summer Season Kick-Off party. Details TBA.

The 4 x 4 Challenge Starts Monday, 3/28!

The CHALLENGE Starts Monday!
The 4 x 4 Challenge starts on Monday, March 28! Now is the perfect time to regenerate a consistent practice and strengthen your health, fitness and well-being. Challenge yourself to complete 4 classes per week for 4 weeks. We will be here to support and encourage you all along the way.
1 Month Unlimited SALE for the 4 x 4 Challenge
For Challengers Only: BYC is offering a One Month Unlimited package for over 20% OFF — just $110 (normal price is $140). You may “freeze” your current 10-class or 30-class package and get 30 challenge days at this discount. After the challenge, your normal package resumes, with all of your previous classes and time added back in.

Sign Up for the Challenge

Come in to the studio to sign up for the 4 x 4 Challenge in the lobby, and keep track of all your classes. Sam has made us another awesome Challenge Chart (and look – 1 of her 9 cats helped)! As always, my name will be at the top and I can’t wait to get started! Let’s do this together — you certainly won’t regret it if you try … but you might if you don’t!

I hope to see you in the hot room on Monday, March 28th!


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Written by cycleguy on January 30th, 2018

Today I honor someone else.

She has been with me permanently for 44 1/2 years. Lord willing, it will be 45 on June 16th.

She is the fantastic mother of my two daughters.

She is the doting mamaw to our only grandson.

She has been my helper, my supporter, my cheerleader (without the outfit…rats!) all these years.

She has gone wherever we have believed God has led us.

She has been a rock through the good times and the tough times.

Her primary love language is Quality Time (and let’s me know when she isn’t getting it).  🙂

She never has been and still is not athletic. She is not like the Energizer bunny. She would prefer to spend a quiet night at home watching TV than go out on the town (which is a good thing). She loves to eat out (but has trouble picking it unless we have been blessed with a gift card). She has a few (very few) close friends. She loves being behind the scenes and pushing me forward. She prefers a stress-free life (her personality type wants peace).

And she’s married to me!

That makes me the most fortunate man on the planet.  I haven’t always known that or believed that but this past year has been a “dream” for both of us. We took a dream vacation thanks to someone in the church. We have been able to dream bigger in our marriage due to a newfound love and respect for each other. I could go on but if she reads this I could get shot. (It would have to be an imaginary gun since I don’t own one).  I’m embarrassing her because she hates attention being brought to herself.

I woke her up this morning playing this song on the record player she got me for Christmas. She knows this is my #2 song of all time. Cheesy I know. I even told her that but since I don’t sing and he does, I let the record say it for me. We’ll spend a quiet day together doing some errands, eating lunch out somewhere so she can be at home tonight watching NCIS, and just enjoying each other’s company. Just the way she likes it.

I love ya baby! (Frankie sings that).

13 Comments so far ↓

  1. Jo, is an amazing woman, Bill. I know you both will continue to love and treasure each other more every day. And that’s how marriage should be!
    Blessings to you both!

  2. Janna Pullins says:

    Happy Birthday Mom! You are an amazing mom, mamaw, friend, Christ follower and I love you very much. She has been a wonderful example of what a Godly mother and wife is supposed to be. I am so grateful that God chose her to be my mom, and Braden’s Mamaw!!!

    • cycleguy says:

      Thanks Janna. She loves you so much and is so proud of the woman you have become. What you have been through has strengthened you not broken you and has made your faith stronger. Thanks for taking the time to respond.

  3. Ed says:

    Jo sounds like an incredible woman. I think the incredible fits you well 🙂

    Congratulations to you both!

  4. Pam says:

    Loved this tribute. However, Dick had a question: How can both you and he be married to the same woman? Haha~ Your description of Jo fits me to a T!!! Happy Birthday, Jo!

  5. floyd says:

    Awesome recognition of your wonderful wife. What a blessing. You’re not you without her.

    I love that song… it’s gonna be stuck in my head all day… There’s worse things I guess…

  6. Betty Draper says:

    A good man has to have a good woman in order to do good things. If the wife is not a good one, his time is taken up with filling in gaps a good woman would fill. Sweet…

  7. Tami says:

    So sappy 🤣. I know I am late commenting here but I know she had a good birthday but it would have been better if I had been with you! Lol 😂 love you and thanks for always
    Encouraging and supporting me (oh and kicking me out of the house lol)

    Sorry I was on a roll!

  8. Lisa notes says:

    Happy Anniversary to you and your lovely wife! That’s a great testimony of God’s faithfulness to stay together that long. I’ve been spending the week with my first grandchild born on Saturday; I look forward to having fun with the next generation with my own husband by my side too.

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Saturday, July 11, 2009

Phoebe: My Favorite Bird

Saturday, July 11, 2009

This is a tribute to my favorite little bird and the sweetest daughter a Dad could ever have: Phoebe Linnea Thompson. Phoebe turns 13 today—yep, she's a teenager.

But I'm not worried. Phoebe is smart, deep, caring, sweet, really funny, and lovely. And every day she gets more so.

She can be tough as nails, hanging with her homey, Liam.

She's not afraid to take a wild ride.

Or to let us know when we've been out birding for WAY too long.

She's a truly kind big sister to Liam, who adores her. They miss each other when they're apart.

Since she was 18 months old, Phoebe has been traveling with us. She's a really good traveler.

She's a dreamer, like her old man.

She loves a good adventure, like a hike into a canyon to see petroglyphs, as the sun is setting over the Montana mountains.

But she also loves to hike at home on our farm. I love that she's waking up to the amazing things nature has to offer. And she's happy exploring them on her own. She gets that "comfortable in solitude thing" from her mom. And that's a rare gift.

I hope she follows her folks into music, too. She's starting down that path. My secret wish is for Phoebe to front her own rock band called Six Foot Redhead. She's only got about 7 more inches to grow.

A week before her 13th birthday, Phoebe got a new bike. She's scarcely been off it ever since.

I don't know where I'd be without my Phoebe. Sometimes I think my life really started the day she was born.

I love you, Phee!

On July 11, 2009 at 12:29 PM AMIT said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
On July 11, 2009 at 12:45 PM Anonymous said...

Bill: What a wonderful post. Happy birthday to Phoebe. Su Snyder

On July 11, 2009 at 2:29 PM Heather said...

What a lovely tribute. Happy Birthday Phoebe!

On July 11, 2009 at 2:37 PM Julie Zickefoose said...

She's a lucky girl to have a Da like you. This makes me weep.

On July 11, 2009 at 4:09 PM cyberthrush said...

Don't know who is luckier, you and J as parents, or Phoebe and Liam as your kids.

On July 11, 2009 at 10:02 PM robin andrea said...

Happy birthday to Phoebe! What a wonderful gift-- this tribute to her-- and her beautiful self to you and Julie. I hope she does front a band named Six Foot Redhead. That's a name I'll remember.

On July 11, 2009 at 10:48 PM Born Again Bird Watcher said...

Happy birthday Phoebe. May you always know happiness, peace, and good health throughout your long life.

On July 12, 2009 at 4:37 PM DebM said...

Lovely post! I'm sure she'll make it to 6'--my daughter who looked just like her (minus the red hair) at 13 is now 6'2" and magnificent at 19. I loved a recent comment she made: "All those long birding trips made me learn how to daydream." Definitely a useful skill!

On July 12, 2009 at 5:23 PM farmnwife said...

Hi. I just found your blog while searching for info about birds. My son in doing a 4H project on bird nests. We found a nest but can't match the bird species to it. Is there a site that will help with this? I am not having any luck. please reply to my email:
thank you

On July 13, 2009 at 12:28 PM Caroline said...

Phoebe shares a birthday with our daughter, beautiful teenaged July babies.
Happy Birthday from another Redhead.

On July 13, 2009 at 1:20 PM Heron said...

Happy Birthday Phoebe ! Wishing you a year filled with fun, adventure, and discovery. And congrats on having some of the coolest parents on the planet.

On July 14, 2009 at 2:35 PM elizabird said...

She is pretty great.
A real jewel!
Give her my love.


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AUD/USD pair

When carrying out currency trading activities in binary options, a trader will look at the market price of the pair that he/she wishes to trade, after compiling a relevant AUD/USD forecast. A market rate for the AUD/USD pair of 0.9417 means that it takes 0.9417 U.S Dollars to buy 1 Canadian Dollar.

The Australian Dollar is the fifth most traded currency, and the AUD/USD forms part of the seven major currency pairs which comprises of the U.S dollar. Australia’s government is stable and the country is a major commodity exporter, making its local currency a valuable tradable asset.

Just like other currency pairs which are affected by external factors, AUD/USD is influenced by the interest rate disparity between the U.S federal reserve and the Bank of Australia. The U.S Federal Reserve can take a decision to move in a particular way and alter the open market with the intention of bolstering the U.S dollar – thus making the pair’s market value decrease. Alternatively, the Bank of Australia could take intervening measures to strengthen the AUD, which would make the currency pair rise in value, a note to remember when carrying out currency trading activities on this pair.

The fact that Australia’s and Canada’s economies are structures similarly and the fact that they are both major commodity exporters implies that they are positively correlated. By consequence, the AUD/USD has a negative correlation with pairs which have the USD as a base currency, such as USD/CAD, USD/JPY, and USD/CHF.

This page offers you the relevant AUD/USD charts which will help you put together a AUD/USD forecast, helping you make more informed decisions for your currency trading activities.


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Unlike traditional Forex trading, how to trade options is simple and revolves around speculating on the direction of the expiry rate of an underlying asset at the end of a predetermined time frame. Forex trading payouts are progressive, in the sense that a trader’s winning or losing amount depends on the difference in pips (last decimal point of an asset’s market rate) from the strike level to the expiry level – the payouts are moreover never pre-determined. This differs from binary options payouts that are known to the trader before placing a trade, and which are solely based on the end result of a yes-or-no decision, hence the name given to binary options trading.

How to trade options is straightforward in nature and makes trading considerably easier due to the fact that traders have simpler decisions to make and already stand to know how much profit or loss they should expect before the execution of an option.

Binary Options trading has been present for quite a while but has experienced a global rise in popularity in 2007. This is due to several factors.

The OCC (Option Clearing Corporation) and SEC (Securities Exchange Commission) made it legal for binary options to be traded in major over-the-counter markets in a global scale, widening market regulation and liquidity. This changed Binary Options trading, following its rapid global expansion, from its previously complicated nature to being more approachable to novice traders who had little knowledge on how to trade options.

The global Binary Options boom wouldn’t have had as high an impact as it did, without the introduction of extremely advanced trading platforms and new emerging features. This came about with the founding of many new brokers who specialized in binary options trading and contributed to the industry’s growth by making binary options trading more attractive to newcomers.

This page will define and give examples of the different types of binary options trading that are offered by most traders, and how to trade each one of those option types.


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Friday, February 1, 2013

Phriday photo, photo quiz answer, & bird ID CORRECTION

Winter wall, Yosemite Falls.

1. 'Cause I just want to look at something else.

2. The photo quiz (shot in Joshua Tree NP):

They are phainopeplas.

Here were the guesses:
(p.s. ANYONE who guesses
gets props for being brave.)

On da blog:

Johnny Nutcase: "Ohhh. You lucky! I know it but won't say it :) You diggin' the new lens??" So polite! She IS a ringer, a professional biologist who takes amazing bird shots every day of her life. =)

Sprout: "No birding quiz is easy when you live on the other side of the Rockies from the bird..." A most excellent point. =) Right coast birding quizzes for me = mostly hopeless unless it's a VERY widespread pup.

Cindy: "wow, funky. I have no idea." Have I ever mentioned I REALLY like when people say things like that? A completely unselfconscious "no idea" makes me love a person. BTW, Cindy's been featuring Yellowstone shots, lately, so that's tasty stuff.

Mia McPherson: "I know but won't say so I don't ruin anyone else's fun! They are gorgeous birds." =) If you've not seen HER bird photos, woah, and any other thing she shoots. =) Another pro (like Johnny Nutcase/Jill)

Anonymous: "A bit easier to ID for me (they live in my backyard), but correctly spelling their name, another story. Love these birds. You will find them in mistletoe infested mesquite, since they happily consume the berries." See, everyone is so polite, I barely got any actual guesses.

From Facebook (where I shamelessly begged for more guesses):

Jill Wussow (a.k.a. Johnny Nutcase) coyly hinted, "starts with a p, ends with an a..." =)   DING!

"Molly Moose": "Phainopepla, but they look smaller and chubbier than ours." DING!

3. CORRECTION re: bird ID. My post of the small hawk that nailed a bird which then shot through the other side of the fence, so the hawk danced and danced?

NOT a Sharp-shinned hawk.*
Way more likely a Cooper's hawk.
Got the word from Steve of Burbon, Bastards, & Birds bloginess.

He also gave me one, no, two good links to
the Cornell site re: distinguishing between them.
Steve is the man. We all know that.

k. The layout looks weird right now,
but I've got stuff to do, so I'll just save,
post, and think happy thoughts.

Hope y'all have a great weekend!

*Post script: just got another comment on the original post re: that hawk, and that person is pretty convinced it's a sharp-shinned. I had thought the breast streaks looked a little thick for coopers, but I've SO little experience w/this, I don't know how variable such things are, etc. Perhaps I'll just conclude that I'm not sure, and it's a tough nut to crack. And, 'course, my photos are not amazing, and the sun hadn't even hit the garden yet, so wasn't exactly bright & crisp. Regardless, THANK YOU to my bird ID coaches--I REALLY appreciate your input. =)

1 comment:

  1. By the way, great photos on your blog. I love that you do ID quizzes too, very fun.

Cool people write inside rectangles....


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Biochar Malaysia Workshop 2015

Group Photo

Biological charcoal or biochar is produced from carbonization of biomass, especially agricultural waste materials, and added into the soils to improve soil quality and crop productivity, decrease carbon footprint and increase carbon sequestration for climate change mitigation.

Biochar Malaysia Workshop 2015 is aimed to bring together all biochar practitioners,  including farmers, researchers, technologists, producers and policy makers to share their knowledge and experiences in biochar research, production and utilization.

The workshop emphasizes on the progress in mass production of biochar in Malaysia using various methods and technology, and farmer scale production and its application as a soil amendment in agriculture. It is in the interest of all stakeholders to ensure a steady progress of biochar production and utilization in Malaysia until it is recognized as a practical method to reduce carbon footprint through carbon sequestration in soil and improve soil quality including contaminated soil recovery.

The workshop was held on the 6th of April, 2015, at the Faculty of Agriculture, UPM.

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Category Archives: Uncategorized

Bioethics Seminar – September 13 – “Genetics & Inequality”-William A. Darity, Jr., PhD, Samuel DuBois Cook Professor of Public Policy, Duke Sanford School of Public Policy

September 13
Title:  Genetics & Inequality
William A. Darity, Jr., PhD,  Samuel DuBois  Cook Professor of Public Policy,  Sanford School of Public Policy; Professor of African and African American Studies; Professor of Economics Affiliate of the Center for Child and Family Policy;  Faculty Research Scholar of DuPRI’s Population Research Center; Affiliate of the Duke Initiative for Science & Society, Duke University
5:00-6:00 PM, Refreshments to follow
Z. Smith Reynolds Library Auditorium, Room 404, Wake Forest University

Performable Case Study – “Perhaps A Level Field” – The (Bio)Ethics of Third-Party Litigation Funding – 25th April

Performed by Spring 2016 Performable Case Studies Class (BIE 727)

Monday 25 April 7:00-8:00 pm

Room 409, Benson University Center, Wake Forest University

The case concerns the ways in which a person who has been injured by a medical device or a questionable medical intervention can become a means to a lucrative end — “investment” or “claim asset” — due to the growing financial services practice of lending to plaintiffs and plaintiffs’ attorneys in class action litigation.

Whether this is exploitative or empowers plaintiffs with pecuniary resources that would otherwise be out of reach — “leveling the field” — is one of a number of issues that the case study interrogates, through the experience of a medically and legally vulnerable patient.

Refreshments to follow

For further information about the Bioethics Seminar Series, please contact Stephanie Reitz:

<> or 758-4256. Website:

“Ethics & Health Care – An Introduction” book published by WFU Graduate Program in Bioethics Faculty, John Moskop PhD

Just published book written by our very own John Moskop, PhD,

He is the Professor of Internal Medicine and Wallace and Mona Wu Chair of Biomedical Ethics at the Wake Forest School of Medicine, Winston-Salem, North Carolina. He chairs the Clinical Ethics Committee at Wake Forest Baptist Medical Center and serves on the Ethics Committee of the American College of Emergency Physicians. He is the author of more than one hundred articles and book chapters on a broad range of topics in bioethics.

About the book

Who should have access to assisted reproductive technologies? Which one of many seriously ill patients should be offered the next available transplant organ? When may a surrogate decision maker decide to withdraw life-prolonging measures from an unconscious patient? Questions like these feature prominently in the field of health care ethics and in the education of health care professionals. This book provides a concise introduction to the major concepts, principles and issues in health care ethics, using case studies throughout to illustrate and analyze challenging ethical issues in contemporary health care. Topics range widely, from confidentiality and truthfulness to end-of-life care and research on human subjects. Ethics and Health Care will be a vital resource for students of applied ethics, bioethics, professional ethics, health law and medical sociology, as well as students of medicine, nursing and other health care professions.

For more details please go here.

Bioethics Seminar – 5 April – Is There a Place For Race In Precision Medicine?

Kahn_Jonathan-225x315JONATHAN KAHN, JD, PhD, James E. Kelley Chair in Tort Law, & Professor of Law, Mitchell Hamline School of Law, St. Paul, Minnesota

Dr. Kahn is a thoughtful and prolific scholar and critical thinker, who specializes in addressing biotechnology’s implications for our ideas of identity, rights, and citizenship, with a particular focus on race and justice. In particular, his work combines law, policy, biology, and bioethics to address the challenges posed by racial categorizations and genetic associations in the pharmaceutical industry.

Refreshments to follow

Tuesday 5 April 4:00-5:00 pm
Room 4001, 525@Vine
Winston-Salem NC, 27101 (WFU Downtown Campus)

October 13 – Presentation – The Dialogic Case Study, Bioethics Pedagogy & the Ethics of Nature

Richard Robeson

Adjunct Professor of Practice-Bioethics, Dept. of Communication; Bioethics Faculty, Graduate School of Arts and Sciences

Case examples will cover a rich variety of subject/issue areas, but the centerpiece of the presentation will be a case involving bioethics, biotechnology and law, which was built in Robeson’s Spring 2011 M.A. in Bioethics class, and has since been featured a number of times at Wake Forest University School of Law, and in Spring 2013 COM 370 — “Communication Ethics/Bioethics: An Interface. “
4:00-5:00 PM, 102 Carswell Hall, Reynolda Campus

Nancy King, JD appointed to the HHS Secretary’s Advisory Committee on Human Research Protections

Nancy King, JD, Professor, Department of Social Sciences & Health Policy and Wake Forest Institute for Regenerative Medicine, Wake Forest School of Medicine; Co-Director, Center for Bioethics, Health, & Society and Graduate Program in Bioethics, Wake Forest University, has been appointed by US Dept of Health & Human Services (HHS) Secretary Burwell to the Secretary’s Advisory Committee on Human Research Protections (SACHRP) for a 4-year term beginning 21st October 2015.

The SACHRP provides expert advice and recommendations to the Secretary of HHS on issues and topics pertaining to the protection of human research subjects. The Committee was created in 2001.

To date SACHRP has focused its attention on areas such as research involving children, prisoners, and individuals with impaired decision-making capacity; informed consent and the use of biospecimens; harmonization of human subjects regulations and guidance; the reduction of regulatory burden; the HIPAA Privacy Rule; community-engaged research, and accreditation.

In upcoming meetings, SACHRP will discuss recommendations to HHS about the recently released Notice of Proposed Rulemaking on changes to the federal regulations for human subjects research.

Enrollment Deficits under the Affordable Care Act (Oct. 2015)

The Wake Forest Law School’s Health Law and Policy Center has issued a report on “enrollment deficits” under the Affordable Care Act,  in North Carolina’s rural counties.  Prepared with support from the Kate B. Reynolds Charitable Trust, this report focuses on the unenrolled population that is potentially eligible for subsidies through the “marketplace” exchange — in order to better target outreach and enrollment efforts.

Enrollments Deficits under the Affordable Care Act – October 2015 –

Edwin Shoaf, Research Associate and Mark A. Hall, Professor of Law & Public Health, Wake Forest University School of Law.

Bioethics Seminar – 6 October – Narrating Bioethics through Feminist Modes of Thinking

Professor Emerita of Philosophy, University of North Carolina – Charlotte

Dr. Rosemarie Tong retired in 2015 as Distinguished Professor of Health Care Ethics in the Department of Philosophy and Director of the Center for Applied and Professional Ethics at UNC Charlotte. Internationally recognized for her contributions to feminist thought and bioethics, Dr. Tong has published 13 books and over 100 scholarly articles, providing expert advice and oversight regarding issues such as health care reform, genetic and reproductive technology, biomedical research, and ethics and public policy. Her lecture addresses the narrative perspectives of feminist bioethics.

Co-sponsored with the Department of Philosophy, Wake Forest University

Tuesday 6 October 5:00-6:00 pm
Z. Smith Reynolds Library Auditorium, Room 404
Reynolda Campus, Wake Forest University
Reception to Follow


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Archives for

It Is Not Just Our Own Boundaries BPD People Have Problems With

Boundaries and Borderline Personality Disorder, Part-2

Remember last time when I talked about the friend that “wouldn’t be my friend anymore” if I didn’t blow up frogs with him?  Well, my boundaries as an adult haven’t gotten much better.  For example:

“Sure, honey.  You can go back to your job as a stripper.  It’s just dancing, right?  I’ll totally overlook the fact that you are shaking your naked jiggly bits at strange men.  Just don’t leave me.

I’m paraphrasing, but I spoke basically those same words to my ex-wife, who also has Borderline Personality Disorder (and was in fact the first time I ever heard the term before).

BoundaryNow, I’m sure there are some open-minded guys out there who would legitimately have no problem with their wife being a stripper.  There are few guys who I’m sure would be totally turned on by it.  Well, I’m not one of those guys.  I’m old-fashioned, and by old-fashioned, I mean “jealous and possessive.”  What I wanted to say was:

“You are my wife.  Yes.  They’re your jiggly bits, but the only person I’m cool with you shaking them at is me.”

But did I tell her that?  No way!  She wanted to do it, so I said “do it.” Then went and cried about it, just like I cried about the frogs.

That’s my own biggest boundary problem.  I’m terrified both of asking for what I want and telling people what I will and will not accept from them.  And that really sucks.

Now… it’s not just our own boundaries people with BPD have problems with, but respecting the boundaries of others, too.   Here’s an example of what I mean.  Let’s pretend that what follows is a series of text messages between me and a former girlfriend of mine (we’ll call her Justine, because it’s not her real name, but it’s a totally hot name for a girlfriend to have, in my opinion).  I’d like to say these hypothetical texts are wildly exaggerated, but in reality, they probably aren’t.  And yes, we BOTH use proper grammar when we text.

JUSTINE: “Sorry, Bruce, but I can’t see you this weekend.  My son has a paper I have to help him with and I’ve GOT to get this project done by Monday.”

BRUCE: “You need space because you want to work on your art?  But the weekends are my time with you!  You NEVER wanna spend time with me anymore.”

JUSTINE: “I know we haven’t seen each other much lately, and I’m sorry.  I hate to not see you, but I really will be too busy.”

BRUCE: “Guess I’m just not very important to you.  You must not love me anymore, so I’m gonna send you mean, accusatory text messages and try to make you feel like a total waste of flesh.  You hurt me, so I’m gonna hurt you.”

That’s paraphrasing.  When I’m in “the zone,” I just do it.  I NEVER admit to it… at least not until after the fact.  I’m working on it.  And then, after five or ten minutes with no response from her, I start again.

BRUCE: “I’m sorry.  I’m a terrible person.  You deserve better.  I’m breaking up with you because I totally suck and should be destroyed.”

And another five minutes.  No response from her.

BRUCE: “Please stop ignoring me!  I don’t ignore you!  Can’t you see how much this is hurting me?”

And in less than two minutes…

BRUCE: “Don’t leave me!  I’m sorry!  I’m sorry!  I’M SORRY!”

And then I go cry, just like I did for exploded frogs and wiggled jiggly bits.  And ten minutes later, I get a reply.

JUSTINE: “Um… I was driving.  Stop being such a drama queen, Bruce.”

BRUCE: “I’m sorry.”

BRUCE: “Please don’t hate me.”

JUSTINE: “I don’t hate you, but I have to get to work now.”

BRUCE: “OK.  I’m sorry.”

Ten minutes.  No response.

BRUCE: “Please don’t leave me!”

I know, I know.  Pathetic.  I’d like to say I’m not that bad anymore, but considering I did something almost exactly like this when I opened my eyes this morning, I’d be lying.

Keep in mind; I’m new at all of this.  Don’t look at me as the wise old sage with all the wisdom.  I’m figuring this out as I’m going along.

So anyway, once I realize the abandonment is only perceived, I’m able to get hold of things quickly, but I do find myself apologizing more and more these days.  Hey, at least I recognize that my behavior is wrong.

Now… When the abandonment is real, when the relationship really is over, I’m much, much worse.

BRUCE: “Fine then.  You don’t love me, and that’s because I’m unlovable.”

JUSTINE: “You’re not unlovable, Bruce.  I care about you a lot.  I just can’t be in a relationship right now.”

BRUCE: “That’s OK.  I understand.  I can’t be in this world right now.  I love you and I’m sorry for what I’m about to do.  Goodbye.”

And that, boys and girls, is where the booze and pills start going down the old gullet.  And that’s where I’m gonna leave (but not abandon) you for this time.

It’s an old writer’s trick.  The cliffhanger.  Always leave them wanting more.

Your brother in arms,

Read more from Bruce Anderson here: How I Became the Freak in the Corner

(A page that tells his story from the beginning and has links to several of his articles)

Boundaries and Borderline Personality Disorder – Part I

Boundaries!  They’re not just for breakfast anymore!

Borderline personality disorder (BPD) – (Called emotionally unstable personality disorder)

Bondary FactorsI can’t remember the product the whole “not just for breakfast anymore” tagline comes from, but for some weird reason, it seems to apply.  See, as someone who has only very recently been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, in the past boundaries were “just for breakfast,” meaning I knew roughly what boundaries were about, I knew I was supposed to have them, but I never really thought about them.

As someone hoping to recover, I’m eating boundaries for breakfast, lunch, dinner and between-meal snacks.  It’s a conscious effort, and I’ll be the first one to tell you, they’re hard to swallow.  I’m already getting sick of it.  And yes, I barfed a few right back up.

For people without Borderline Personality Disorder, boundaries are something they learned naturally over the course of their lives.  For me, I’ve gotta pack all of that learning into my adulthood, when things such as boundaries are much harder to learn.  Or rather, I have to unlearn what I learned about boundaries in my childhood.

In my last article, I mentioned the fear of abandonment being the big nasty as far as BPD goes.  I also mentioned that it’s most likely caused by childhood trauma.  So, like a horrifying, traumatic version of a Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup (“chocolate and peanut butter—two great tastes that go great together”) I’m gonna talk about boundary problems from my childhood.  And please, try not to hate me when you read the next line.

When I was a kid, I used to hurt animals.

I know what you’re thinking.  That’s the sign of a whooooole different kind of personality issue and also one of the hallmark signs of a budding young serial killer.  So before you go running for the hills thinking you’ve been taking advice from Ted Bundy, allow me to clarify.

When I was a kid, I used to hurt animals… and then go cry about it.

I didn’t like it.  I hated doing it.  I’ve always been an animal lover.  To this day, the thought of what I did makes me sick to my heart.  See, I used to blow up frogs with firecrackers.  Not because I wanted to, but because my “friend” wanted me to.

As the nerdy, sickly kid who always got beat up, friends were hard to come by.  So when I did find one, I did whatever it took to hang onto him or her.  Even if that meant doing something I knew in my heart was intrinsically evil.  If I didn’t do it, he “wouldn’t be my friend anymore.”

Those were his words.  I remember.  So, I did it… and then went and cried about it.

People with Borderline Personality Disorder have all sorts of boundary problems.  Our own personal boundaries can be far too flexible or far too rigid.  Personally, I’m of the “people pleasing” variety.

Whatever it takes to make someone else not leave me, I’m cool with it… sorta… but we’ll talk more about that next time.

Your brother in arms,

Read more from Bruce Anderson here: How I Became the Freak in the Corner

(A page that tells his story from the beginning and has links to several of his articles)


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Archives for

depression and counseling

Counseling for Depression

Depression does require medication.

If you suffer from depression, and your doctor has prescribed an antidepressant for you, you will find that, in about three weeks, you are able to function in your life again — even while taking the medication.

Depression MedicationUnfortunately, this gives people a sense of “I’m all better now” that isn’t quite true. You see; depression does require medication, but it also requires counseling. Without proper counseling, you will never get to the root of the problem — what is causing the depression. The medication will not make that go away — it only deals with the symptoms of depression.

Counseling is needed to deal with the cause of the depression.

Counseling for depression may have two parts. The first part may be traditional therapy so that the counselor can help you to discover what the problem is, in the event that you do not already know. Sometimes depression has no visible cause. Other times, it may be caused by a physical condition that does not need any counseling at all — the depression lifts when the condition is treated.

So, traditional therapy may be needed, but that will usually be followed with Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, or CBTCognitive Behavioral Therapy essentially teaches you a new way of thinking — a new way of looking at or approaching a problem, — something that enables you to deal with the problem in a more constructive, timely manner. Once the problem that is causing the depression is taken care of, the depressed state lifts.

CBT can take anywhere from 12-20 weeks. Furthermore, depending on the severity of your depression, your doctor may not feel that counseling should be sought until the medication prescribed has a chance to work. On the other hand, he (or she) may think that the depression warrants immediate counseling. This varies from one individual to another.

Note that most therapists are not licensed to prescribe medication. That requires a medical doctor or a psychiatrist.


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Archives for

talk therapy

Dispelling a Few Myths about Bipolar Disorder

Dispelling myths about Bipolar Disorder

Hello again, fellow wackos and electronic rubberneckers!Bipolar?

If you’re here because you’re like me—just a little “off”—then welcome. If you’re here to learn about bipolar disorder, stick around, because I know a thing or two and I like to talk. If you’re here to watch the train wreck happen, hoping I’ll melt down and post something crazy about the talking wombats that live in my refrigerator and their TV viewing habits… well, you’ll probably be a little disappointed. I may be a freak, but I’m not crazy.
Yeah, that’s right. I just called myself a freak. I figure if other people are going to call me that, I can probably get away with saying it myself. Wacko, nutcase, loony, psycho… There are lots of things people say about bipolar disorder, and many of them just aren’t true. Let’s take a look at a few of those things right now.

Bipolar Myth #1People with bipolar disorder aren’t really sick.
Bipolar SkelletonSome people say that bipolar disorder is “all in your head.” They say things like “everyone gets depressed. You just need to suck it up and deal with it like everyone else.” If this is true, then diabetics just need to get over their illness, too. I mean, too much sugar is bad for everyone, right?
Just as a diabetic’s body doesn’t process sugars properly, a person with bipolar disorder’s brain doesn’t process dopamine, serotonin and norepinephrine quite right.
Don’t take my word for it, though. Take it from research scientists at the University of Michigan who’ve studied Abnormal Brain Chemistry Found in Bipolar Disorder. They know what they’re talking about.
I’m just some freak, remember?
So, you can tell me I don’t have a “real” disease and that I just need to deal with it, but first you gotta tell Ms. Diabetic to eat six Twinkies and deal with it. Go ahead. I’ll call 911 while she’s chewing.
This myth is so prevalent that insurance companies are allowed to treat it—or more accurately NOT treat it—like it isn’t a “real” disease. The last health insurance I had would pay for 80% of the bill if I had to have major surgery, but only 50% if I saw a doctor for bipolar disorder. Also, they limited the number of times I could see a doctor for treatment to 12 times a year. Tell you what… let’s limit diabetics to 12 insulin shots per year and see how well they do.
What? We shouldn’t do that because they could get sick and die?
Well, people with bipolar disorder die, too. In fact, without proper treatment, 20% of them commit suicide. That’s one in five, folks. I’d say that constitutes a serious health risk. Maybe this bipolar thing is a real disease after all.

Bipolar Myth #2People with bipolar disorder are beyond hope.
He’s got bipolar disorder. He’s crazy. He can’t be helped. He’s a lost cause. Or is he?
The fact is—he isn’t. Bipolar disorder is one of the EASIEST conditions to treat. There are several effective medications, some of which have been in use for quite a while. Lithium, for example, has been around since the 1950’s. Lithium doesn’t work for everyone, though. That’s why there’s Lamictal, Depakote, Zoloft, Tegretol, Wellbutrin, Prozac, Effexor, and a partridge in a pear tree. A psychiatrist can tinker with medications until he finds a combination that works.
Medications can help, but so can just talking. Talk therapy did me more good than any pill ever did. However, without the pills, I probably wouldn’t have listened to anything when I was at rock bottom.
The point is this: people with bipolar disorder CAN be helped. So if you have bipolar disorder or know someone who does, don’t give up. There is hope.
Well gang, it looks like I’m over word count. I told you I like to talk! We’ll talk some more next time when I dispel a few more myths about bipolar disorder.
So to all my friends and fellow freaks, until next time… keep fighting!

Bruce Anderson

Read more here: Words As Weapons And Another Bipolar Myth Dispelled


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Thursday, May 3, 2012

A For Instance

Now I have not yet gotten into the conditions of both bipolar and MS, but I can tell you that today, over the last few days, was a bipolar day. I think it had to do with the reduction (okay, ending) of Klonopin in my system, because I just ran out of it. Klonopin takes about 18-50 hours to leave your system, but the small amount I take skedaddled out of me soon. It was just two days, but that was enough. I noted in the previous post that Monday was rather "cloudy" for me, and last night, as also noted, I hardly slept at all. So today I was not quite as "cloudy", but I was manic. This is one half of the bipolar nightmare (and the other is depression).

In the manic phase of bipolar disorder, feelings of heightened energy, creativity, and euphoria are common. People experiencing a manic episode often talk a mile a minute, sleep very little, and are hyperactive. They may also feel like they’re all-powerful, invincible, or destined for greatness.

Also, for added entertainment, you can have delusions, hallucinations (though this is rare), but really with impaired judgement. This morning in a burst of energy ( sleep.. burst of energy) I was cleaning a curio cabinet in the bedroom. On the top shelf is a 10 inch tall glass angel that was my mother in law's and now resides in our home. I dusted the angel's shelf and moved on to some lower levels. I leaned back and then suddenly I felt something flick by the bill of my baseball cap on its way by to the carpeted floor. The angel had taken a flyer off the shelf, and had nearly come down upon my head, which would have done some damage. And things aren't going too well in there already.

I replaced the angel on its shelf and even made sure everything was returned to its original place. I would have replaced the dust if I could. And through out the morning I kept looking at that angel, hoping it would remain sedately in prayer and not looking at me. If you are a fan of Doctor Who, the most recent series, you may know of the Weeping Angels who sneak up on you. Don't blink. It was like that. I had the thought all morning that that angel was watching me from everywhere in the house, that I'd offended Someone and they were letting me know that. Paranoia and delusion triumphant. Later, at physical therapy, I found myself leaping around the pool, not using the step ladders and keeping a very immature feeling. The therapist was not amused, and I felt terrible. I got home, took my Klonopin and tried to relax, letting things go. No nap, but more back to me.

I owe someone an apology. That angel fell to warn me, perhaps. My physical therapist has helped me in many ways, working with me not only on land (gym) and water (pool), but using her reiki talents to help battle my inner demons as a True Angel did once before.

For me, MS means More Slowly. I think of the people who have come into my life to help during this time, friends who have drifted off, family unsure of their place. But I look for Angels, even when they fall off the shelf, or I do. We'll catch each other.

More soon.

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Wednesday, December 30, 2015

Forge Away ...

We are always forging new versions of ourselves; at least, that has been my own experience. I guess some people stay pretty much the same throughout the course of their lives - but that, in my view, is a poor expression of our talent for exploration. I think we need to be open to improving who we are and deepening our understanding of the world we live in.
Who we decide to learn from, to spend time with, to be like … greatly determines how our lives might unfold. This is why I cringe when I see good people, interesting people, spending time with martial arts instructors who don’t even know how to run their own lives. Such wasted opportunity.
Someone once said that each of us are an amalgam of the five people we spend most time with … in fact, I disagree with this. I think it is much more a case of ‘being inspired by’ rather than ‘having spent time with’ ….
There are people who I have spent very little time with, yet I have found myself deeply influenced and inspired by some aspect of who they are or what they stand for.

Martial arts teachers can easily find themselves in a position to influence and inspire those who train with them … and this is why I believe, that as teachers, we should hold ourselves to a higher standard. We cannot be all things to all people, but we should always strive to be the very best version of ourselves that we can be … in the hope of inspiring others to do the same. - JBW

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I agree completely with your premise, and not just because it sounds good. It is and always has been the right thing to do, and that is why I've tried my best to emulate this characteristic throughout my life. Keep up the good work.

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Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Getting Jazzed

Throwback Thursday Post ... I'll be backdating this to March.
For the most part, our family is pretty happy just watching the Jazz games on television (I know I am! I like to avoid the crowds and chaos and just stick to the comfort of home ... and the commentary helps me out too!). But as the boys generally play in the Junior Jazz basketball season, and that includes a couple tickets to a game ... we generally make at least one trip downtown each season, to the nosebleed seats!  This year for the first time ever, the rec center offered extra tickets for families to purchase, which was so nice. As long as Grayson is making the effort to take one kid, he might as well take a few! I bought extra tickets for the other kids, and they had a fun night.

My brother Scott has slightly nicer seats, in a suite with their work. He invited our family up for a game. A very different experience than the Junior Jazz seats! The suite was sweet! Food was provided, comfortable seating, even a private bathroom. And the dessert bar ... yum! If you click on the picture above and enlarge it, you can see some of the treats!

I even overcame my anxiety and attended with the family!

Thanks Scott!

And the Jazz won both times we went to the games!

Saturday, March 21, 2015

Callahan's Prom Pictures

Prom. Callahan and Amanda. Ah ... cute couple!

In the weeks before from, there was the asking, and the answering (we ended up with a life sized Justin Beiber cutout in the house). Then there is the fitting for the tux rental (happily there is a local place that is very reasonable), the ordering of the corsage, the making of plans. Normally, the kids to big long day dates, but Amanda had a dance thing in the morning, so this was pretty much just dinner and dancing, without a lot of the extras.  Here are some pictures from prom ...

The corsage and ticket.

 The "pickup" picture at the house.
Mom's of boys often miss out on this - I told him I wanted a picture!

Group shot before ...

Dinner at Olive Garden ...

We mentioned to Uncle Clay that is where they were going ...
Silly texts. I think it stressed Callahan out just a bit ;)

Not a limo, but they had a nice ride arranged.

 Another group shot.

 BIG group shot!

Another prom down in the books ...

Monday, March 16, 2015

Moab in March (2015)

In March, Gray decided to take a trip down to Moab. It was rather last minute. At first it was just going to be him and his mom, doing some family history stuff. Then Ana and the boys thought they would go, and then Gray talked the three youngest into going as well (say there is going to be a hotel with a swimming pool, and they will probably be on board). Callahan didn't go, and I stayed home with him. It was fun to get photo updates, and hear all about the trip from the boys after. I actually think I prefer vicarious vacations myself ;)

They hit the usual hot spots ...

Hole in the Rock

A small zoo, and a camel ride!

Lots of License Plates
Cooper likes license plates (Cooper's Collection)

The Rock Shop ... and new necklaces.

Scenic Views (Deadhorse Point)
Keaton didn't want to get too close to the edge!

A Memorable Magic Show

Swimming in the Hotel Pool

Then, there was visiting family (the real reason for the trip)
with Aunt Joan

... and Grandma Henry

It was just a quick weekend trip. But they packed a lot into it!
There are a few more photos in my Facebook album (here) and even more on Gray's Facebook.

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

The Great Room Rearrange

There are six bedrooms in our house, but only four being used as actual bedrooms (the other two are the den/homework room upstairs and the scrapbook/lego room downstairs). So excluding the master, that means three bedrooms between five boys; two of the rooms have had double occupancy almost forever. When the kids were young, it was always the "baby" who had the third room to himself, but as we grew out of the baby stage, Landon received this honor.

With Landon off to Mexico for two years, it was time for the great room rearrange! Callahan would move into Landon's room, Keaton would move into Colton and Cooper's room, and Colton and Cooper would move downstairs into the room that Callahan and Keaton had been sharing.

Landon had packed up most of his things, he didn't have a ton of stuff. Many of the clothes he left behind would work for Callahan, so they were just left in the closet. We moved up Callahan's clothes and he was pretty much done. We didn't redo anything ... the same bed, comforter, desk, chair. It looks just the same.

Then, in the closet and drawer space Callahan vacated (which actually wasn't much! As he took just his favorites to move upstairs, he left almost a full closet of clothes. Big piles of discards and giveaways ensued) we moved in Colton's clothes. With spots in the upstairs closet now empty, we moved Keaton upstairs. Then we moved Cooper's clothes down into the empty spot just vacated by Keaton.

There was a little rearranging of furniture downstairs. We got rid of one of the old dressers (one that had been mine from childhood), but the rest of the room stayed much the same (bed, bookcase, dresser with the TV on top ... all in the same spot). There were piles and piles (and piles and piles) of clothes to go through from every closet/drawer move. These piles were all in the downstairs family room.

It was Keaton's new room that experienced some change. We had promised him we could paint the walls ...very needed. New carpet would have been great too, but that didn't happen. We pulled out EVERYTHING. The old queen bed C&C had shared. A dresser, multiple plastic drawers, a nightstand. Off to DI it all went (well, the bed went to the dump). Gray bought a twin bed, and we moved in an extra desk from the den. I ordered a new comforter, and picked up a cute lamp and locker-type nightstand.  We washed the walls, and did eventually get around to new paint. One accent wall in navy, the rest in a nice eggshell. At last ...

The new arrangement has been really nice. Keaton keeps his room nice and clean, much better than Colton and Cooper. The basement room actually works out quite well for Cooper. It was where we would have him retreat during storms anyway. He can't really see the lightening or hear thunder. I don't walk by the room as much, to notice the mess ... or smell.  Callahan ... he's not quite as clean as Landon was (I like to have the door open to let the natural light into the hallway, thus it's very visible).

Previously ... I'd have to trek downstairs and wake Callahan in the mornings before school. Often this would require a couple of trips, as the boy likes to sleep. I'd attempt to tickle or spank him awake, but it was difficult wrangling with him on the bottom bunk there. It's SO much easier to attack him upstairs. I can just grab his legs and pull ... and he's out of bed (much to his chagrin)! The little boys are almost always up on their own, so I don't have to make a morning trek to the basement bedroom anymore.

I also did eventually get through all the piles of clothes. It was good to go through all the closets, seeing what we actually have, what actually gets worn, getting rid of everything that was just taking up space. It is nice to just start fresh sometimes.

When Landon comes home ... I'm not sure what we'll do. We'll probably clean out one of the two "other" rooms and stick him in there. Who knows if he'll even be living at home, or be off to college. And Callahan would be leaving the nest around that time as well.

But for now, we're all rearranged, and it is good!

Monday, March 2, 2015

Family Photos

I'll admit, I'm a snapshot gal. I generally do get a lot of pictures taken, but nothing professionally. We've had a couple family photo shoots, set up by extended family, but we'd NEVER had one just for us. With Landon leaving, we figured we probably should.

My SIL Alicia has a photography business (Gray Wren Photography) and as she is family, it did seem a logical choice. Alicia even came over and helped pick out a wardrobe. She met us at Gardner Historic Village the last day of January. It was a bit chilly, but no snow!

Here are a few candid shots from the day (taken by Gray, NOT Gray Wren) *Ü*

We were pretty excited to get our finished photos back. Alicia sent us a link to a mobile album to view online (and an app for our phone) and then dropped off a flash drive with full sized files.

Here's a little compilation I created to share square on Instagram ...

I went ahead and updated my Facebook ...
A new profile picture and cover photo for me.

I updated Colton's as well ...

... and, I'm not sure if you remember what this blog looked like before,
but I updated it as well!

Yea for family photos!

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I am officially "home for the holidays!"
Feels good...feels pretty darn good. Thank the heavens I made it. Half-way there, I got really sleepy. This is the second time thats happened to me. I know it had a lot to do with me getting only like 4-5 hours of sleep last night and the heater in my car. That would do it. I think the white noise of the road has an effect on me as well. I'm just not the ideal road-trip companion...give me about 15-30 mins and I'm knocked out.
I called my G-ma, cause my sister was not very helpful, to keep me
talking. Made a stop at Wendy's. After a Jr. Bacon Cheeseburger, I was back on the grind, homie.
Mannn, I can't even explain how good it feels to be back. My sis and I
 chilled at my G-ma's for a while. I've missed her...
and her home cooking. Yummy in my tummy! She is a trip too. Snazzy lady, if I do say so myself. I know she must get lonely staying there by herself. While my sis and I were semi-fussing she said, "Ya'll I miss that. That fussing. Haha." I mean considering how packed that house was, talk about Full House, I'm sure there is a big difference. I pray we get to share many, many, many more moments like that.
After watching a lifetime movie, we headed to the house and moms. Haha. I missed her too. We may all go to our separate rooms once we walk in the door, but we're pretty close. It's been just us three girls for forever. Haha.

In Other News...
I got that new Kanye, thanks to my future bro-in-law. Yeah, I'm late...but eh. So, I've been listening to all the tracks. I always like to find another favorite other than the singles on the radio. I really like "Paranoid" & "Robocop." From what I heard, it seems people either really hate or really love this album. It gets ✰✰✰ from me, pretty average. Tis all for tonight.

Rai said...

haha. I usually stay up on long drives.
I rarely fall asleep, but if I do ... I tend to wake up.

.rawkii said...

Thats how my G-ma is...she says she "needs o see what is going on." Haha. I hope I do too. Cali is home too! =]

Rai said...

My Grandma is in Maryland right now. lol
She's a trip, cursing & all.

Ohhh he is.... interesting. lol -whistles

Yeah and that's so true about Kanye's album.
A lot of people either like it or they don't.

.rawkii said...


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Sunday, January 4, 2015

We actually went to a football game

Since Lizzy was born she has had a lot of firsts, but this UF football game was a first for Blake and I as well. We had never gone to football game as students, it being our last semester we figured it was a must. The week before we all went to our first tale gating party for Blake's BCN club, we had never seen campus transform into such a festive scene, and pumped us full of team spirit. So when a friend called with 12 tickets up for grabs, we took them and invited some of the Russ family to come along. The weather was perfect for little Lizzy to enjoy the outdoors and for me to get out of the house. The stadium is only a mile and a half from our apartment so we made the walk instead of fighting traffic. Even if the last few football seasons have not been the best, we are still proud to be Florida Gators.

1 comment:

  1. Love reading about you and your family! Go Gators!!


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