text:
Graciously Gritting One’s Teeth When The Shower Theme Is Not To One’s Liking

by admin on February 2, 2012

This is a situation that’s occurring right now.  My mother decided that she wants to throw a baby shower for me and asked me what I would like. I told her that I want something small and simple, since I have not had an easy pregnancy to date and do not want something complicated. I told her that I would love a tea party themed shower. Now, she then called my best friend up to ask for her input. My best friend also told her the above. I received a call from my mother, who had already booked a fairly upscale restaurant for an elaborate party. My mother spoke with my husband, telling him what she had planned to see if I would like it. DH explained to her that it was not a good idea, that a simple tea party would be best. She then decides to guilt trip both my husband and myself because she had already spent the money on this party, which I would rather she not do at all. She has decided to do what she wants, regardless of what we want. It has become a competition to her to upstage my SIL’s mother for what she had done for my SIL’s baby shower. Is there anyway to either get her to drop this elaborate party or drop hosting duty? Thanks for any input. 0201-12

Showers, whether they be for a wedding or a baby, are not supposed to be hosted by immediate family members. The reasoning for this is that it has the appearance of the family colluding to prevail upon others to provide the necessary items to either set up a house or equip a nursery they themselves are not willing to purchase.    Generosity begins at home, as they say, and the family should be the primary resource for acquiring these things.   Yes, I know there will be the usual dissenters who insist that a shower is to celebrate the birth of a baby but please, don’t go there.  If you want to celebrate a birth in the family, call it anything else except a “shower”, which the very name  carries a very implicit expectation that gifts are expected.

So, you’ve agreed to your mother hosting you a baby shower.  Having stepped onto the slippery slope of etiquette by condoning her inappropriate hosting of a shower, you are on there for the whole ride down, I’m afraid.  At this point, it would be very distasteful and rude to decline the shower on the grounds that the theme and location is not to your liking.   Hostesses can solicit ideas and preferences from the guest of honor but they are not bound to follow them.   Guests of honor must hope their friends and family will host something in keeping with their personal tastes but if that does not happen, the only alternative is to buck up, grit your teeth graciously and enjoy the shower.

{ 50 comments… read them below or add one }

Just Laura February 2, 2012 at 10:38 am

I was married less than a year ago, and when my mother asked to throw me a shower out-of-state, I declined for the reasons stated above. She was certainly unhappy about it, and tried to lay a bit of a guilt-trip, but too bad.

OP, I’m sorry that your mother seems to want to make this about her rather than you or your baby, but you could have said ‘no.’ You accepted, knowing that you have had a difficult pregnancy. There’s no one to blame but yourself.

Powers February 2, 2012 at 10:38 am

After all that, you still think she “agreed” to her mother hosting? I doubt she had much choice in that matter, either.

Wink-n-Smile February 2, 2012 at 10:52 am

What if the hostess decides to have it in the dead of night, under a full moon, in front of a graveyard, and have black hair and purple clothes? And all the music played in a minor key? And a buffet that includes both hot and cold items? What if the guests give gifts that have dragons and skulls on them?

Are you sure it wouldn’t be incumbent on the guest of honor to write the hostess a nasty note about how she’s making a mockery of the fine tradition of showers, and then crawl out the bathroom window?

Enna February 2, 2012 at 11:02 am

I do see were Admin is coming from but I do see that is very unfair on the OP for her mother to completely ignore what she has requested. Chalk it down to experince: if there is anyway you can “reign in” your mother for taking it even further do but in future I would not let her host things if she is going to ignore your feelings completely.

OP you have mentioned that your pregnancy has not been easy: you must always put your health and your baby’s health first. If mother gets upset because you feel too unwell to go or have to leave early she should have listened to your preferences first as they would have been less stressful and more praticial. E.g. if you get caught short at a restruant it’s not as easy as it is at home – you can take a little nap if you are home / close firend’s / close family member’s house and wake up 5 mins before the tea party starts – you can’t do that at a restruant.

Anonymous February 2, 2012 at 11:02 am

I think this is one of those situations where “etiquette” and “relationships” collide. The OP probably didn’t feel that she could decline her mother hosting the shower, for fear of hurting her feelings, or making her mother angry. The way I see it, the mother was much more enthusiastic about the idea than the OP was, the mother called up out of the blue all excited about the idea, and the OP reluctantly went along with it, stipulating that she wanted something small and simple……..and then the mother cheerfully disregarded that and planned something big, expensive, and complicated. This is basically the plot of many, many episodes of Party Mamas–mom gets carried away planning something huge, Party Kid wants something less over-the-top, Mom gets overcome with stress, and yells at the vendors, her husband, and of course, the kid, for being “ungrateful.” The situation in the OP sounds similar, except the Party Mama and the Party Daughter are a bit older. Anyway, if we were to strictly adhere to the rule that the host makes all the decisions for the party, and the guests (even the guest of honour) ultimately have no say, then that would mean it’d be polite for all those Party Mamas out there to bulldoze their kids’ wishes for a simple birthday party/Bat Mitzvah/graduation/whatever, and rude of the kids to speak up and say they’d prefer to have just a few friends over for pizza and cake. But, usually, when I’ve watched that show, most of the Party Kids are much politer than their Party Mamas. So, I think I’d like to file a motion for a “Party Mamas Clause” in the “Host(ess) Has Absolute Power” rule, because otherwise, that rule can be taken to pretty ridiculous heights.

CaffeineKatie February 2, 2012 at 11:10 am

Or tell her your health won’t permit you to attend, and let her deal with it by herself.

Jan74 February 2, 2012 at 11:10 am

Agree 100% with a shower is not a celebration of the birth of a baby. First of all, if it were a celebration, it would happen after the birth, not before so that people can buy things.

Wendy February 2, 2012 at 11:11 am

This is why I detest showers.

OP, I’d go, say thank you, gush about how much you appreciate what your mom did, and then go home and grumble. At this point she’s put quite a bit of money into it, so it would be additionally rude to make her stop. Let her have her fun.

--Lia February 2, 2012 at 11:13 am

I’m interested in what “guilt trip both my husband and myself” consists of. Your mother can make some comments, but the choice to feel guilty is yours. What does she say? What does she do? The better you get at letting her comments roll off you, the faster she’ll get at realizing her tactics don’t work and stop doing them.

As for what you can do now. First, I’d recommend appealing again to your mother. I wouldn’t recommend this for any other relationship, but for a mother, I like to recommend trying again and again. Next, talk to the guests. You know them all so you can be honest. “I’d have preferred something much simpler, but you know Mother. This pregnancy has been a difficult one. I’m not sure I’m up to a big celebration, but I’ll try to put in an appearance, though I’m sure I won’t be able to stay long.” Then do what you’ve said. Show up for a short time, make your apologies about not feeling up to staying longer, and exit. There’s a reasonable chance your mother will be spitting mad, but the communication will be much better the next time. She’ll understand that you mean what you say and that the last time to pressure someone into doing something she doesn’t have the strength for is when she’s pregnant.

I’m wondering what the etiquette advice is for any other unwilling guest of honor at an event. What does the shy retiring man do when he’s supposed to be honoree at a party celebrating his 50 years of service? How does he say he doesn’t want it?

PurplPngn February 2, 2012 at 11:57 am

“She has decided to do what she wants, regardless of what we want. It has become a competition to her to upstage my SIL’s mother for what she had done for my SIL’s baby shower.”

Based on the OP’s description of her mother, this shower was going to happen whether the daughter approved/agreed/condoned or not.

OP February 2, 2012 at 11:59 am

A side note that I forgot to mention when I was writing this. I did not agree to my mother hosting the shower-my best friend wanted to do this, but then received a phone call from my mother, stating that she was going to do it. Thank you for your input admin.

Kate February 2, 2012 at 12:08 pm

Wait what? You agreed to allow her to host a small tea party, so now you’re stuck with a large restaurant? Tell your mother you are thrilled that’s she’s excited to celebrate, but as you told her before, you have had a difficult pregnancy, are uncomfortable with a large fete, and will not be attending.

Calli Arcale February 2, 2012 at 12:43 pm

I have to agree that I don’t see any gracious way out of the shower at this point. Your mom asked you for input, ignored the input, and is now upset that you’re offended that she didn’t listen to you. This isn’t going to end well if you both stand your ground. Best course is to rest well before the shower, put on your best face, attend as graciously as you can, and try to ignore the money spent and the one-upping and all that. Thank your mother politely for it afterwards, and then get on with life. Take it as a lesson learned that your mother may have difficulties settling into the “grandma” role with appropriate boundaries, and be ready to take charge once the little one has arrived so that this isn’t repeated with, say, a baptism party or the first birthday or whatnot.

Amber February 2, 2012 at 12:53 pm

Eesh. “But I don’t LIKE the party that’s being planned for me at another’s expense, even though I said I’d willingly attend!”

Ashley February 2, 2012 at 1:02 pm

Call me crass, but I’ve never seen the problem of family hosting a shower for you. Most showers I’ve been too have been hosted by a cousin or a sister with support of the mother of the bride/new mommy. Also, I’ve never have nor have met people have do, have issues with mothers having a shower for every child born. As long as it is a fun filled day with laughter, then what’s the issue.

That being said, daugter’s wishes should have been respected. Daughter should let her mother know how this is not what she wanted but attept to enjoy the day.

Gloria Shiner February 2, 2012 at 1:48 pm

The OP does mention trying to get her mother to give up hosting. Maybe that’s the way to go. If it’s a difficult pregnancy and going through with this elaborate party is too taxing, that’s a perfect excuse:

“I’m sorry, you asked me what I want, and I just can’t do that. My doctor says it would be too stressing. Maybe we could have lunch there after the baby is born.”

After all, Mom did ask.

Chrysla February 2, 2012 at 2:01 pm

While it is unbelievable to me that Mom would ask about OP’s wishes and get not one but two answers reinforcing an easy going party, then ignore that completely, I know it does happen. I would express my disappointment to Mom for ignoring my wishes when I was expressly asked but thank her for throwing the party. I would then make it clear that I would try to attend, but may leave early due to fatigue from the over-the-top event.

I am currently eight months pregnant and completely understand, I am exhausted and in constant pain during this pregnancy and really do not want to attend a party at all. My friends and family completely understood and have done something wonderful for me. Because I had complications early on, they organized a schedule where one or two people would stop by each week, bring me their shower gift and then help me with household chores, cleaning, cooking, etc… I got to have a relaxing and meaningful encounter with each person and much needed help. My friends and family are the best, I have cried (with joy!) thinking about their generosity and kindness.

I hope the OP can get the benefit of friends helping her this way, and help take off the burden of overbearing Mom.

AriaDream February 2, 2012 at 2:34 pm

*slow blink* This is really weird. I mean, tea parties can be SO refined and beautiful! The mother could have asked an expensive restaurant if they’d be willing to do a high tea, if she wanted to waste her money that way. I’m not sure why she’s going so far out of her way to disregard the mom to be’s wishes.

Dear! February 2, 2012 at 3:00 pm

OP, I understand you may not have wanted what she has planned, but this is a gift. You agreed to it. She has spent money and time getting it together. To now refuse would be rather ungrateful. In her mind I’m sure she just wants to give you something very nice, so suck it up and enjoy your evening at the fancy restaruant where people will shower you with gifts.

MidoriBird February 2, 2012 at 3:41 pm

My thoughts are in slight disagreement. OP has not had an easy pregnancy and my concerns are not putting undue stress on an already difficult situation. If things were easier it might have been easier to graciously go with the flow, but this demonstrates a marked disrespect for the wishes of others, and smacks of a conniving guilt-tripper who lays on the heavy emotions when she doesn’t get her way. This is just asking for a tense affair made worse because everyone knew they advised the party-giver to do the exact opposite of what she’s just done, and a woman with a difficult pregnancy struggling to put this one, down, too, and knowing her mother had absolutely not considered her daughter’s feelings in the matter or the health of her unborn child’s.

This said, I too cannot think of a gracious way to handle this situation except grin, bear it, and try not to get so stressed that the OP puts herself, or her unborn child, in a situation they’d rather not end up finding themselves in. Admin does have a point about where politeness faces. :/

Lisa Marie February 2, 2012 at 3:46 pm

My one and only baby shower many years ago was held totally against my will. I too wanted a simple shower with a few people there. Instead my mother got the bit in her teeth with my aunts and held it at a person’s house (she was seeing my uncle and I detested her children). Not only that, the men folks were also invited and it turned into another beer drinking festival. I gritted my teeth and was gracious to everyone, passed the baby etc. But my husband and I left ASAP.

Angela February 2, 2012 at 4:42 pm

Some mothers (and other family members) don’t take no for an answer, at least without a big ugly scene that a woman carrying a difficult pregnancy might not want to deal with. I know if I had declined my stepmother’s shower, she would have been very hurt. Is the rule so important that it’s worth insulting or greatly disappointing someone who had really looked forward to helping you celebrate a new baby?

Sarah Jane February 2, 2012 at 5:11 pm

I agree with Jan74 and wish to add that a baby shower is not for the BABY, it is for the PARENTS.

Wink-n-smile, your post made me laugh out loud for real.

MellowedOne February 2, 2012 at 5:21 pm

” She then decides to guilt trip both my husband and myself because she had already spent the money on this party, which I would rather she not do at all. ”

OP, if either you or your husband in any way gave the go-ahead..even if it was very reluctantly and because of being guilted..then you have committed yourself to attending.

OP February 2, 2012 at 5:25 pm

Thank you guys for your input. As for what guilt tripping us consists of, have any of you encountered the patented Jewish guilt? It is an experience all of it’s own. My major concern is that I will be nine months pregnant when this shower occurs and my health has not endured well for it. This is the reason why I wanted something small, simple, and uncomplicated. There was no option of saying no-I only found out after the fact that my mother would be the one organizing the shower. My best friend had wanted to do it and then my mother overrode her on it. Wink-n-Smile, if I was feeling up to it, I would’ve loved a shower like that.

Lisa February 2, 2012 at 5:50 pm

I’m glad I am not the only person who has had a shower “against my will,” so to speak. When I got married, my mom told me that she wanted to throw me a shower. I thanked her but was politely clear that I was not interested in having one. Lo and behold, invitations went out (I found out after the fact.) To make things even more interesting, 90% of the people invited to the shower weren’t invited to the wedding! When she told me all this (at T-2 days), she added, “I knew you would be upset about this. But don’t worry – I put on the invitations that you didn’t want any gifts.” Holy guacamole, I wish I was making this up. That was a bad day for me, I felt like everyone was judging me. I found out later that most people didn’t even realize that there was anything to feel slighted about (my family and mom’s friends are pretty honest when it comes to feeling slighted, lol). A couple of family members who were a bit hurt at not being invited to the wedding were very understanding when I finally cleared the air with them.

To the poster – save yourself if you can. Sometimes it’s less stressful to be rude to one person (your mom) than a whole slew of friends and family. If you can’t get out of it, just grin and bear it. I have a feeling that, like my situation, the outcome won’t be nearly as bad as it is in your head!

wyntershere February 2, 2012 at 5:58 pm

I am going to go out on my own limb here and say we should be flattered, honored, and thrilled that ANYBODY wants to honor us at certain times in our lives (birthday/wedding/anniversary/retirement, etc.) I don’t think we should put stipulations on what showers/parties/celebrations are suppose to be when we are the honoree. If someone wants to throw us a party, whether they tell us or it’s a surprise, we just accept their offering–just like a gift at Christmas. You politely said “thank you, you were so sweet to think of me” and then do with it what you will AFTERWARDS. If it truly is a gag-fest, you still got to suck it up, be as sweet as can be, and high tail it as soon as you can.

Michele February 2, 2012 at 5:58 pm

I’ve never been pregnant, but perhaps those of you who have been can explain to me why, during a difficult pregnancy, a tea party is handleable, but a lunch at nice restaurant is not. Is the tea party at a cafe/hall?

ES February 2, 2012 at 6:19 pm

Etiquette says if someone throws you a party, you smile and say “thank you”. If you are ill, you leave, and no one is allowed to be mad about it.

But this is, as pp pointed out, a relational problem, not a social problem. Yes, it was thoughtless and overbearing of the mom to feign interest in the daughter’s wishes and then force a situation where she feels uncomfortable. It was unkind and manipulative to try to “guilt” the daughter into liking the party of mom’s choice. It sounds like there are some underlying problems here on communication and boundaries. Mom can’t “make” the daughter be pleased, and daughter can’t “make” mom behave sensitively or considerately. Taking other people’s opinions personally is a sure road to misery for everyone.

And if Mom is going to continue being thoughtless and overbearing, OP, you should consider how you will deal with that when she is Grandma. What are you going to let slide and what are you going to not allow? I believe it is worth a lot of leeway to let grandparents enjoy their grandbabies, but sometimes they will throw common sense out the window and the parents have to pick up the pieces later. Think about ways you can draw a line and stick with it when need be.

kudeebee February 2, 2012 at 7:03 pm

OP–I am sorry that this event has turned out the way it has.

I would tell your mother that you appreciate her hosting the shower and the work that she is doing though you wish she would have stayed with a smaller, more informal affair. Tell her that you are not sure if you will be able to handle the big event and that she needs to be prepared that you might not be able to attend or if you can attend, that you might not be able to stay the whole time as the doctor does not want you to get worn out or stressed. You can do some damage control ahead of time if you are talking to someone and they mention the party. “Yes, I am looing forward to it, not sure how long I will be able to stay as I get tired so easily and doctor doesn’t want me to get overly tired or put any stress on the baby.”

Have your dh and bf take you to the event and have dh stay nearby. As soon as you feel tired or stressed, call him to come get you. BF can run interference and make your apology as you leave. “OP wants to thank all of you for coming. Unfortunately, she is feeling very tired and needs to leave the event early. I know you will all understand as we don’t want to put any unnecessary pressure or stress on OP and the baby.”

At this point, let mother do what she wants and don’t worry about it–won’t do any good or change a things. Keep yourself calm and relaxed. Grumble to dh and bf. She can’t make you feel guilty, she can try all she wants, but as a pp said, you control your reactions.

Ally L February 2, 2012 at 7:28 pm

I respectfully disagree on this one. The OP cites health reasons for not wanting something complicated and fussy, and I’m going to assume that she also does not want to go ~out~ during her pregnancy. A simple tea party means that she would be able to celebrate comfortably, perhaps even at her own house. OP, I would thank your mom graciously, but say that due to your health, you can’t attend the shower she wants to throw. She’s your mother, she shouldn’t want to jeopardize her grandchild just to throw a party. I would also want to establish some boundaries and have her follow them, otherwise she could be so enthusiastic with the arrival of the baby that she once again ignores your wishes to do what she wants to do.

Pixie February 2, 2012 at 8:15 pm

So, your friend wanted to host and your mom took over? I think at that point it is ok to speak up. Explain how tacky it is for Granny-to-be to host, and so you must decline.

MeganAmy February 2, 2012 at 8:37 pm

I have a mother who sounds a lot like the OP’s. I have learned that a gift is not a “gift” when it is unwanted and forced upon you.

OP’s best friend should not have acquiesced to the mother when the mother said “I’m throwing the shower. Not you.” And now that I have children, I warn you, OP, if your mother is a selfish boundary stomper now, it will get far worse when your child(ren) is (are) born.

You have to look out for your health and the health of your child now. If you think you can endure the party, consider it. But personally, I would put a stop to the boundary stomping right now. I’d call mom and say “Thanks so much for your kind intentions, but I cannot manage to attend a party that large, that far of a drive away, that long, that fancy” whatever words work. I’d call the best friend and see if she still wanted to throw a small, calm, tea party shower. And then I’d tell mom “As was originally planned, best friend is throwing my shower. Thanks for your good intentions anyway.” And I would warn best friend not to let mom help with invitations or any preparations for the shower. OP’s mom sounds pushy and narcissistic, not well-intentioned. The shower is for OP and the baby, not the mom’s glory.

In all likelihood, the mother did not put a lot of money down, and will be able to get some or all back. However, that’s not OP’s concern. OP was guilted into attending something because she didn’t want her mother to waste money that she already spent without the OP’s ok. The mother sounds very manipulative. I wouldn’t reward that behavior the name of “being polite.” It wasn’t polite to railroad you into doing something you were clear you did not want. And it certainly will not be good for your difficult pregnancy to go along with it.

badkitty February 2, 2012 at 11:06 pm

Simple rule: a gift is not a gift if there is zero consideration for the “recipient” behind it – otherwise I could simply deliver my trash to my neighbors instead of taking it out to the curb and make them thank me every week. Likewise, you are not the honored guest at a party that seeks to honor and glorify the hostess rather than meet ANY of your needs. Yes, she’ll trot out some guilt (and I do know all about being dangerously ill and still blamed for “making Mother sick with my ingratitude and spitefulness”) so just be ready to gasp and grab your belly – that will be your signal for hubby to step in and send you to bed to rest – as soon as she starts in. She can’t guilt you if you’re not in the room! Let your friend pass the word around to the rest of the guest list that you will not be attending this little fête, and their absence will be understood as well.

Bint February 3, 2012 at 8:57 am

“Call me crass, but I’ve never seen the problem of family hosting a shower for you…Also, I’ve never have nor have met people have do, have issues with mothers having a shower for every child born. As long as it is a fun filled day with laughter, then what’s the issue.”

Because to quite a lot of people, your family organising a gift-giving event for you looks a bit greedy. If all you wanted was the “fun filled day with laughter” then you wouldn’t need a shower. The word ‘shower’ puts the emphasis on the presents aspect. And to have one for every kid born might suggest to some people a level of entitlement. Just have the fun filled day! Why the need to formalise people’s generosity with a baby? I don’t understand it. It’s not like worrying you’ll get six toasters!

MellowedOne February 3, 2012 at 9:06 am

OP, I’d like to revise my prior statement if I may.

Since this is a matter of your health and not just a “I don’t care for that type of party” issue, I would suggest addressing your mother directly with a decision that allows no room for compromise. Something to the effect of, “I appreciate you wanting to host such a nice shower for me, but my pregnancy is not going well and I will not be able to handle that type of shower. The only thing I will be able to manage is X” Be prepared for the guilting and whining to follow, and be resolved to stick to your guns.

It’s difficult to have pushy relatives (especially immediate family). That said, you and your husband, although recognizing your mother’s nature, have not trained yourself to deal with her properly. You both need to be unified and resolved to stand your ground when she oversteps her bounds. There are many, many stories on here of individuals experiencing serious anxiety over issues from allowing someone to bulldoze them into things they didn’t like.

Reminds me of an expression: “If you don’t stand for something you’ll fall for anything”.

Wink-n-Smile February 3, 2012 at 9:36 am

OP – #11 – Oh, my goodness! Your mother STOLE the shower?!

OK, that is definitely an etiquette hell-worthy stunt. Good grief!

You take care of yourself, first. Go to the party, but as others have said, make it brief and then go home to rest.
And, if you feel yourself getting faint or woozy ath the party, don’t bother to fight it, as I’m sure you normally would. Go ahead and give into it. Pass out. Seriously. Do it. But only if it’s real. Don’t fake a faint, just to make a point to your mother.

Wink-n-Smile February 3, 2012 at 9:53 am

MeganAmy – 33 – I read that, and though it was a great idea. Then, I got this sinking feeling. What if she tells her mother that BF is throwing the shower, and Mom pretends to agree, only to find out when and where BF is throwing her shower, and then Mom goes all out on her own shower again, and schedules it FOR THE SAME TIME! Then makes the daughter choose.

Far-fetched? Yes. But not unheard of, nope, not at all. It’s been done. I think I read about it here. Or maybe at another site. But I know I’ve heard of the competing parties.

OP, the other posters are right. You’re going to have to decide very soon just what your boundaries with the child will be, and how you’re going to deal with the “boundary-stomper” mother. Remember – YOU are your child’s mother, and YOU have final say over how that child will be raise, and how much time he/she spends with Granny. You CAN curtail her visitation with the child, if needed. Let her know that, and be in control from the beginning.

Do you have any big, burly friends who might be willing to “stand guard” for the first week or two, to enforce your visitation schedule? Just long enough so Mom gets the point?

Cat February 3, 2012 at 11:36 am

Maire February 3, 2012 at 11:55 am

I don’t see the huge gap between the ‘tea-party’ themed shower and the meal at a nice restaurant that would so greatly impact the OP’s health, unless she’s so emotionally upset by the lack of a particular theme that she’s stressing herself out over it, which is ridiculous. The best route is to be gracious, go, take a seat and try to enjoy it. No need to meet thoughtlessness with outright rudeness.

Kendra February 3, 2012 at 12:28 pm

OP, you cannot stop your mother from throwing her party, but you can decline to participate. It is etiquette approved to decline inappropriate “gifts”, like expensive gifts from a gentleman caller or parties where gifts are traditionally expected thrown by family members. I don’t know “Jewish guilt” but I do know “Catholic guilt”, and I can say that one of the most freeing experiences for me is when I realized that I’m not responsible for another person’s choices. Your mother’s choices are hers and hers alone, and are not your responsibility nor your fault. I love how people will do over the top things, then when the “honoree” balks, say “but I did it all for yyyyyooooouuuuu, do you want it all to go to waste?” and we feel guilty and do whatever even though there are several scenes from a Steven King novel we would rather reenact than do whatever. On the other hand, when someone pulls that kind of guilt trip, we could say “I didn’t ask you to, I didn’t want you to, you chose to do it, but I don’t want to, so I’m not going to. Have fun with whatever.” Give her ownership of her choices instead of letting her put that on you. She can’t guilt you without your consent. There are several good books and websites out there about “letting go with love” on how to not let others manipulate you that might be helpful to you in this situation. I know it is very hard to say “no” to mom, especially since this is probably a pattern you have had with her your whole life, but you will become a mom soon, yourself, and learning to say “no” now, will serve you well into the future. Hope this helps.

chechina February 3, 2012 at 6:12 pm

I don’t agree that people should be always be grateful when somebody gives them something they specifically said they didn’t want. The term “white elephant” comes to mind. Clearly, OP’s mom is throwing this for her own benefit, not her family’s.

However, if people are showing up for this party, OP has no choice really but to find a nice place to sit for the duration and smile politely. I would engage the best friend and the husband to help out with any gift-opening (friend) and guest-thanking (husband) duties. And leave after a few hours.

Cat Whisperer February 3, 2012 at 9:49 pm

Reading this situation made me think of a quote: “Insanity is relative. You get it from your relatives.”

The most crazy-making people in our lives unfortuanately tend to be relatives, either by blood or by marriage. The reason they make us crazy? We can’t (usually) dump them and disappear them from our lives, the way we can dump non-relatives who do things that have us tearing our hair and grinding our teeth in frustration or irritation. We’re stuck with them, and on top of everything, we’re loaded down with the societal expectation that our relatives are nearest and dearest to us, so we get guilted if we feel that the reality is that we’d trade some of our relatives in on a cage full of baboons and come out ahead on that trade.

That said, here’s something I can say to OP that might help her to put things in a different light. My mom died two years before my daughter, her only grandchild, was born. While I know that if she had lived to see my daughter, there are a lot of things she would have done and said that would have made me crazy, there is literally not a day that goes by that I don’t think how happy my mom would have been to do all the grandmother stuff. And it’s been 22 years since she passed away.

Yes, OP, your mom can, and apparently has, made your life more difficult. But she’s there with you to share the experiences of your pregnancy and forthcoming parenthood. She obviously is blissfully and unfortunately blindly happy-joyed over your pregnancy. Please focus on the joy, and try to push the irritation aside and enjoy the shower she’s throwing for you. Whatever her faults and flaws are, and I’m sure that like all of us she’s an imperfect human being, she’s THERE and she’s ALIVE. Think about what you would be feeling if she wasn’t there and wasn’t alive, because it can happen literally in minutes that she’s gone forever.

Congratulations on your expectations, and try to enjoy the experiences. It’s all memory gold when you look back on it.

jess February 4, 2012 at 3:12 am

Please be grateful. I have never had anyone throw me any type of shower, I diddnt even get an engagement party or hens night and barely got a congratulations when I finally got into Law School after years of studying with two young kids; my nan sent me a congratulations card which means more to me than anything I own. It isnt like I wanted them for the gifts, that doesnt matter to me a bit. I am just hurt that no one even thought I was worth the effort of planning anything. Like the saying ‘its the thought that counts’ and no one thought…….

badkitty February 4, 2012 at 10:45 am

I’m also concerned by the number of commenters who don’t see the difference between a relaxed tea party at someone’s house and a prolonged fancy dinner for a sick pregnant woman. I can only hope that all of these are people who have never been pregnant, or spent much time with someone who was expecting… if she’s on even partial bed-rest, sitting upright for hours at a time is right out, and driving all the way to a restaurant only to stand or sit around is just asking for a medical emergency. A tea party, on the other hand, can be hosted in someone’s home; OP can arrive early and nap or rest up and get herself “into position” before the guests arrive. She can also easily move to more comfortable seating or even go and have a bit of a lie-down if needed – something a restaurant is just not equipped to accommodate. I have to wonder if all those who say “suck it up and go” would feel the same way if it was some other physical disability that kept her from being comfortable with the setting?

Katie February 4, 2012 at 12:30 pm

I think that the OP’s health and wellbeing is far more important than normal ‘politeness’ here, particularly as she hasn’t had an easy pregnancy. Nothing in her post suggests that she agreed to this party, either!

Can you tell your mother that you this party really, really isn’t what you want, and the thought of it is starting to upset you? Would she listen? If she’s mentioning money, could you perhaps ring the restaurant to see if there is any possibility of cancelling (I’m assuming that what she meant was having paid a deposit). If you explain that you’re pregnant and aren’t going to be up to attending, they *may* give the deposit back as a good-will gesture…

For what it’s worth, I think that you’ve been put in a very difficult position. I hope you can work it out. xx

Enna February 5, 2012 at 11:25 am

@ Just Laura – I don’t think the OP is to blame – she didn’t know that her Mum was going to go off and do something that the OP didn’t want, otherwise I think OP would have said no. She also mentions how her Mum is trying to point score with her SIL. @ Amber: maybe the OP agreed to keep the peace.

The OP mentions later on that she forgot to add that her firend was orginally going to do it and the mother changed it behind OP’s back. Op also mentions that she will be 9 months pregnant at the time of the meal. To me this could be pushing things to the line a bit. Since the OP has forgotten to mention some bits to it shows due to pregnanacy she is a little bit scatty and wants to agree in order to avoid any argurmenents.

OP just put yourself and your baby first. If you don’t feel well enough to go and your mum knows you have had problems then it is her look-out. If you go don’t feel pressuerd in staying any longer then you want to. Be strict with you mum in future and don’t let her host anything – or give her one more chance. Explain why you don’t want her hosting because of the baby shower but if she messes up her second chance then use that as well as the shower to say you don’t want her hosting things when she asks next time.

Ashley February 5, 2012 at 7:07 pm

Because to quite a lot of people, your family organising a gift-giving event for you looks a bit greedy

I can honestly say I’ve never heard anyone complain about this. Maybe this is why it is not so strange to me. Where I’m from, SE Virginia middle class African Americans church goers, cousins, sisters, or mothers normally co-host a shower for you. Also, we bring gifts for the shower and the wedding. Maybe it is a regional cultural thing. Here, we don’t think that way. In our social circles, which are huge (Southern families and all) we do that. You get a shower for each baby and a family member hosts for you.

VltGrantham February 6, 2012 at 1:13 pm

“I can honestly say I’ve never heard anyone complain about this.”

Because to do so is undoubtedly rude, but that doesn’t mean people aren’t thinking it. I too live in SE Virginia. Most of my relatives would never, ever, allow their Mom or MIL to host a shower for them. It comes from a friend or distant relative or it doesn’t come at all. Multiple showers (i.e., for the birth of additional children) are also a no-no.

No one has ever died from not having one.

And even though we don’t hold showers, it doesn’t mean we withold gifts for them or their parents or more importantly, our love, support, and affection.

Honestly, I feel for the OP though and she needs to get a spine and quick. It’s hard and I’m sure harder still if she is going through a difficult pregnancy to stand up to an overbearing parent, but if she’s of an age to be married and pregnant, it’s time she grew one. She’s going to need it in the coming years ahead.

Jessica February 6, 2012 at 5:41 pm

jess, that you would have liked something doesn’t mean everyone loves the same thing. Some people are not comfortable being forced into the center of attention. I’m sorry you didn’t get what you wanted but having something you are not comfortable with foisted upon you is potentially worse, because that is a boundary violation.

I dropped a friendship with someone who didn’t respect my wish to not be subjected to a hen night and I would do the same again. Anyone who knows me that well and goes against my clearly stated wishes is not a friend and I have no obligation to be thrilled she decided to step all over my boundaries.

Leave a Comment

Previous post:

Next post:


Content-Type: application/http; msgtype=response

WARC-Type: response

text:
Sage Stallone's Death Certificate

On Friday July 13, Sylvester Stallone’s 36-year-old son, Sage Stallone, was found dead at his Los Angeles home. The Los Angeles Department of Public Health has just released Sage’s death certificate, currently listing the cause of death as “deferred.” The coroner is still waiting for toxicology results before ruling on the final cause of death.

In an unrelated development, a source close to the situation told ET that the pills, paramedic badges, and other medical equipment found at Sage's home were props for his future film about paramedics.

RELATED: Sage Stallone Found Dead

George Braunstein, Sage's friend and lawyer for 15 years, told ET that Sage had been planning a Las Vegas wedding before his death.

On July 21, an intimate group of friends and family bid farewell to the Rocky actor’s son at St. Martin of Tours Catholic Church in Brentwood.

You might also like

Around the Web

warcinfo:
robots: classic
hostname: ip-10-171-10-70.ec2.internal
software: Nutch 1.6 (CC)/CC WarcExport 1.0
isPartOf: CC-MAIN-2017-04
operator: CommonCrawl Admin
description: Wide crawl of the web for January 2017
publisher: CommonCrawl
format: WARC File Format 1.0
conformsTo: http://bibnum.bnf.fr/WARC/WARC_ISO_28500_version1_latestdraft.pdf


text:
My basket
0 articles
Your basket is empty
lun-ven 8h00-18h30 call me back
4x4 partsStandard brakes › Shoes - slack adjuster
BRJ2011 equivalent to 47062-35020

Shoes - slack adjuster

notes: Rear - right (RHS) - price per unit

Shoes - slack adjuster for all vehicles
non contractual photo

GENUINE: genuine part supplied by the vehicle
manufacturer in original packaging BRJ2011

weight: 0.2 kg
28.10 excl. VAT

Currently restocking
in 4 weeks (expected delay)

Don't get stuck - we're here to help !
Don't get stuck - we're here to help ! contact us +33 559 45 11 44 call me back Call me back contact us Contact us


text:
Eat Lead: The Return of Matt Hazard - Gameplay

Two short sections of gameplay from D3 Publisher's tongue in cheek action blaster, complete with the witticisms of Arrested Development's Will Arnett.

Comments (6)

Comments for this article are now closed, but please feel free to continue chatting on the forum!

  • Loading... hold tight!


text:
Now Reading:

Egypt's army chief warns country is on brink of collapse

Egypt's army chief warns country is on brink of collapse

Egyptian military chief General Abdel Fattah al-Sisi has warned that political strife could lead to the collapse of the state.

As the country faces economic, political and social turmoil, al-Sisi has stressed that the army will remain the “solid block” on which the Egypt rests.

More than 50 people have been killed in a week of disorder, a year after the revolution that ended the army’s rule and brought President Mohamed Mursi to power.

Tourism, one of Egypt’s key industries, is being battered by the ongoing unrest.

In the capital, bystander Mohamed Abdel says he saw an attempted siege on the Semiramis Intercontinental hotel:

“We discovered some assailants breaking through the entrance and we went to the police, who came and fired tear gas,” he says.

Mursi called a crisis meeting with political leaders late on Monday, but key opposition group, the National Salvation Front, refused to attend.

Next Article

world news

Israel admits to immigrant birth control programme for Ethiopians


WARC-Truncated: length

text:
Loading... Please wait...

Dekang King of Tobacco E-Liquid | 10mL

 star rating 5 Write a Review
$5.99 (You save $3.00)
SKU: 81155
Ships same day if order placed before 2:00 P.M. EST (except Sundays and Holidays)
  • Buy 3 or above and get 10% off

Dekang King of Tobacco Flavor E-Liquid | E-Juice

  • 10mL or about 200 drops
  • Available in 50/50 PG/VG Blend, 80/20 PG/VG Blend & 20/80 PG/VG Blend
  • Choose from No Nicotine (0mg), Ultra Low (6mg), Low (11mg), Med (16mg), and High (24mg) Nicotine Strength

IMPORTANT NOTE:  This product may contain nicotine and it should always be kept away from children and pets.  It is HIGHLY recommended that you shake the bottle well before use.

Write your own product review

  1. king of tobacco  star rating

    Posted by Robert Weldon on 13th Aug 2014

    The absolute best tasting oil on the market. Has a smooth tobacco flavor, not to harsh, not to weak, just right.

  2. king of tobacco  star rating

    Posted by Robert Weldon on 19th Jul 2014

    Love the flavor. Robust with a little hint of sweet. Hope it's around for a while because I don't vape with any other oil.

  3. I lke this stuff...  star rating

    Posted by Wayne S. on 26th Mar 2014

    I like this flavor. It is virtually identical to one of the "tobacco" flavors sold by a previous vendor that I once used before discovering EVC. It isn't my absolute fave, but it's pretty good. It's worthwhile to keep some of it around.

  4. Good Tobacco  star rating

    Posted by Paul from Missouri on 28th Jan 2014

    I have tried a lot of tobacco liquids and never found anything that would satisfy my tobacco cravings until I tried the King of Tobacco by dekang.
    I never cared to much for the dekang brand liquids until I tried this. It is a very nice tobacco taste and I will be ordering more.

  5. Surprisingly Smooth Taste  star rating

    Posted by Unknown on 9th Jan 2014

    Bought on sale and glad I did. Best tasting tobacco to me so far. Love it! will buy in bulk next order.

We guarantee all batteries, chargers, Joye eVic Control Heads, Chrome Vari-Tube Bodies, Mini Chrome Vari-Tube Bodies, Revolution Bodies, and Indulgence V4 Power Switches to be free from defects in material and workmanship under normal use and service for 30 days from the date in which you received your order.

All Atomizers, Cartomizers, Clearomizers and Heads (Atomizer & Clearomizer Heads) have no warranty and are guaranteed to not be received as DOA (Dead on Arrival) ONLY!

Please note that before shipping, we test each Atomizer's resistance and check for continuity with a multimeter.

We do not check any Cartomizers or Clearomizers (except RiVa-T CE2 Clearomizers) so we suggest that you check for DOAs as soon as you receive your order.

All DOA claims and return requests must be made within 24 hours of receiving your order.

This warranty and Exchange Policy DOES NOT guarantee or replace any products with damage caused by normal/heavy wear and tear, modification of our products, improper setup, use of products bought outside our store/website which causes damage to our product/s, or unintentional/intentional misuse or abuse of our products.

This warranty DOES NOT cover any Cartridges or E-Liquid for safety and sanitary reasons.

Sign up for our newsletter

View Cart Go To Checkout


text:
for Santa Clarita, CA and surrounding 50 Miles
To add these search results to your own website, click here!
Valencia, CA 91355 - Distance: 0 Mile(s)
We have a warehouse stocked with the finest pre-fabricated vinyl fences ready to surround homes in Valencia. Custom fence building from Fence Company Valencia includes selection...
Valencia, CA 91355 - Distance: 0 Mile(s)
Gate Company Valencia knows the high value driveway gates bring to properties in Valencia. Whether for security for a large company building or for your driveway at home, driveway...
Valencia, CA 91355 - Distance: 2 Mile(s)
Newhall, CA 91321 - Distance: 2 Mile(s)
This historic site was the home of silent film star William S. Hart and on display are many paintings by Russell De Yong, J. M. Flagg and Remington. Also on exhibit are...
50% OFF Tickets

Valencia, CA 91354 - Distance: 3 Mile(s)
Valencia, CA 91355 - Distance: 3 Mile(s)
Experience the famous Six Flags with water slides, wave pool, countless rides, shows in a beautiful setting.
Valencia, CA 91355 - Distance: 3 Mile(s)
Aerial rides, kiddie rides, animal shows, observation tower and more at this familiy spot.
Santa Clarita, CA 91355 - Distance: 5 Mile(s)
This park is one of the first places where gold was discovered in this state. Hiking trails, original cabins, live animal exhibits and a natural history museum are also featured.
Santa Clarita, CA 91321 - Distance: 6 Mile(s)
This market brings you the freshest fruits, vegetables, free range ranch eggs, nuts, honey, potted plants and cut flowers; All at the peak of season! The market is open Sunday...
Newhall, CA 91321 - Distance: 6 Mile(s)
Don't miss this opportunity to spend your Thursday evenings April through October strolling through this colorful, European-style, open air market. Join family and friends for...
Canyon Country, CA 91351 - Distance: 6 Mile(s)
Active Air Specialists is a young company with old and new experience , that provides a special blend of professionalism to our service. Our hvac company has been built on quality...
Next 20


text:
Tuesday, March 20, 2012

The Birth of a New Season: Spring Babies!

Kids! They are always ruining the best laid plans...in the best way!

Woke this morning to the 8th consecutive hottest day in March in Chicago with a high expected in the 80s, feeling like summer on the very first day of spring. Took my daughter to school and saw Erica on the way home - "The babies are here!" she shouted as she walked by my fence on the way to the farm. "They were born last night," and with a wave she was on her way.

I had intended to do a ton of work, play catchup and get ahead. No, the babies are here! A quick trip into the house, grabbed my camera and soon I was headed in the same direction. The babies are finally here! The baby goats that we thought were due two weeks ago! Gretta's babies!

Any excuse to go to the farm will do, really. New babies are the best excuse possible though. I opened the door gently, saying hello to the sweet brown mouse who lives nearby, and greeted Kazoo, the mama. Nestled nearby were three little balls of the softest curls, one apricot, one light brown, and one white. The white one is biggest, and a playful little scamp – I've secretly named him Scamp.

When they nurse they wag their tails like mad, delighted to be near mom, to be eating, to be safe. It is the most intimate and wonderful moment - and reminded me of the many moments I spent with my own sweet girl, cooing while she ate.

Kazoo is a good mom. She's gentle and talkative but scolds when needed - and trust me, Scamp needed a scolding.

All in all I can't think of a better way to greet spring - beautiful weather, new babies, fresh air and eager flowers poking their heads up through the ground

Hello spring! Hello babies!

Sunday, March 18, 2012

Recipe: 40 Clove Roasted Garlic Lemon Chicken, or the Best Darn Garlic Spread Ever!

Ages ago when my husband and I lived in the city we took some cooking classes together. Well, kind of. The cooking classes were his Christmas present but he was kind enough to use a little of the gift card to take me to a few classes as well.

One of the classes we took was French inspired - Mussels with Tomatoes, Tarragon, White Wine and Cream, 40 Clove Garlic Chicken, a Celery Root Purée, and of course, Crème Brûlée. Everything was wonderful. Except the chicken. It was boring. Really boring. How could something with 40 cloves of garlic be anything but amazing?

The other day I came across our recipes from class. 40 Clove Garlic Chicken still makes my heart skip a beat and yet inside I know the sad truth: boring. I couldn't take it anymore. I hard to revise this recipe to be, well, at least something approaching the genius that the name implies.

Changes? About a million, give or take. First off, I roasted a whole chicken and skipped braising one that has been cut into eight pieces. Second, I've roasted the garlic first. Why? Because I am obsessed with roasted garlic lately, that's why. Plus, roasting softens the garlic and turns it into a buttery, sink-right-into-the-meat taste explosion. Or seriously, just skip the chicken and slather this on everything in sight, I kid you not.

Then I added lemon to brighten the flavor. Garlic on its own is lovely but it needs a friend to help it present itself as the powerhouse we all know and love. Finally, I cranked up the spices and puréed the whole thing...and this is where it all went so right it was wrong.

Nothing should taste as good as this garlic purée. Nothing. If you are smart you won't tell anyone about this recipe, you'll make the purée and then you'll slather it all over an entire loaf of bread and eat it all by yourself, every single one of those 40 cloves of garlic. Or you could just use a spoon, which I did. I have no shame.

If, though, you made the unfortunate decision to tell your family about the meal you could add the purée to your chicken, working it under the skin and slathering it all over the bird, and roast until a crispy golden perfection.

Then steal the bird, run away and eat it all with an entire loaf of bread. Or, again, just put the spread on anything you can locate within an arms reach.

My husband's reaction: "This is the best chicken I've ever had!" then he asked me to make it again and put it on "every vegetable we get in our CSA all summer long." I have to agree. Obviously, this could go one of two ways - you could use it for the best darn garlic bread/peas/carrots/mushrooms/celeriac/random vegetable ever, or you can use it on a chicken. Vegetarian, carnivore. Potato...oooh, it would be good on that too...

4-5 heads of garlic
2 oz or 1/4 cup fresh lemon juice (about 3 smaller lemons)
Approx 3/4 - 1 cup Olive Oil
1 teaspoon salt + extra for seasoning
1/2 teaspoon pepper + extra for seasoning
1 Tablespoon Herbs de Provence + extra for seasoning (or use Italian Seasoning if you must, you know, I'm flexible)
1 3.5-4 lb Roaster chicken
1-2 cups Chicken stock, white wine, or beer (not porter/stout)
2-4 red potatoes (optional)

For Purée:

Preheat oven to 400°F

With a sharp knife cut about 1/4" off the top of the garlic cloves.

Place garlic heads, cut side up, in a smaller baking dish.

Then, if you are crazy, like I am, fish out the cut off garlic bits and add those to your baking dish as well. Just remember to remove them half-way through baking or you'll have deep fried garlic cloves. I use a slotted spoon or spider for this purpose.

Pour oil over the garlic into the dish until about 1/4" deep (about 3/4 - 1 cup)

Sprinkle a few grinds of salt, pepper and a few pinches of Herbs de Provence over the garlic.

Cover with foil and bake for 30-45 minutes.

Once the garlic is semi translucent and soft remove from the oven and let cool, in the pan.

Once the garlic is cool enough for you to handle go ahead and slide all the softened cloves out and into a food processor or bowl. You can use a small knife, spoon or utensil to remove the garlic if you like - I just use my hands. Keep the remaining skins/shells though - you'll see why.

Add the oil the garlic was roasted in, lemon juice, salt, pepper and herbs to the food processor. Reserve the spent lemons. You may reduce the oil by half or more if you like to make a thicker purée - I recommend this for vegetables, spreads and such - more oil is better for the chicken to keep the meat juicy and moist but otherwise reduce the oil and start with less when processing.

Purée until a smooth, buttery paste-like consistency. If you don't have a food processor just mash with a fork or potato masher until as smooth as your prefer.

Run away and eat. Or use for your bread...or chicken.

For Chicken:

Preheat oven to 375°F

Rinse and pat your chicken dry. Loosen the skin at the back of the breast and fill the cavity between the breast and the skin with the garlic purée. Be generous.

Place the spent lemons inside the chicken cavity. Truss your chicken then slather with the remaining purée. Don't know how to truss a chicken? That's ok. This corny joke teller will show you how. Humor always helps, in my book.

Instead of using another pan I like to slice red potatoes in half then place the flat side down in the roasting pan from the garlic. Place the chicken on top of the potatoes and there you have it, a roasting tray. Add a few of the remaining garlic skins (because there is still a bit of garlic in there) around the chicken and pour your chosen liquid about half way up the potatoes - I like to use one of my husband's Octoberfest style homebrews.

Roast chicken for 45 minutes. Turn heat up to 425°F and roast another 20-30 minutes until the thickest part of the breast is 170°F. If the bird is browning more than your like cover with foil and continue to roast. Enjoy the red potatoes flavored with the cooking liquid as a side and add in something lovely and green for a complete meal.

Thursday, March 15, 2012

Tutorial: Pot O' Gold Presents: Money (or Message) Soap Gift Tutorial

Super easy, super fast and a fun take on the boring ol', but very appreciated money gift, money soap is the way to go for a difficult gift. A smart friend will use the soap as intended, until their reward, but there are those who might carve away at the best laid plans - just be warned. Delayed gratification isn't everyone's bag, so be it.

Every year we try to find a fun and creative way to give my nephews the same gift: money. We've done puzzles and traps, and this past Christmas we did soap. I had seen money soap before but at $12 + shippping for about $2 worth of soap and no telling how much money was within, well, it wasn't the right option for us. I knew that since the soap was clear it must be glycerin soap, which is easy enough to get and often available as a "natural" bar soap. Luckily, glycerin soap is very gentle as well, so recipients don't have to worry about skin irritations. Making our own money soap meant we were in control of how much money was within and appropriate labeling.

Perhaps you don't have anyone to give a gift to for St. Patrick's day but the pot of gold reference was too much for me to resist. Just tuck this idea in your memory for later graduations, birthdays, and the like.

What you'll need:
Glycerin Soap - clear or any color you like. My local store started carrying clear one week after this project! Gah!
Money or a waterproofed note/message (try a thin lamination on any note you like)
Drill and longer, straight drill bit. I used a 3/8" bit (tapered bits won't work for this application)
Label paper or adhesive and paper

If the soap is shrink wrapped, start by taking off any labels you can. I removed the back label only, since I would be covering up the front one anyway - this way the recipient can clearly see there is something in the soap. You can remove all the packaging if you like, but I kept it on to keep the soap "clean" in handling.

Next roll up your money or note as tightly as possible. Measure it against your bit to make sure your drill bit is long enough.

Position the rolled up money/note where you would like to go in the soap and make a small mark where it ends - this will serve as your guide when drilling and indicate where to stop drilling. I used a chalk marker, you could also use a dry erase marker, same idea.

Take your drill and drill directly into the soap (through the wrapping if it is still there). I found it easiest to drill downward. Stop at your mark.

Slide your rolled money or note into the drilled out hole as far as you can.

Your drill bit will have some soap remnant on it. Remove these and place them over the hole in the soap where you drilled. Using your fingers gently push the extra soap down into the hole - since glycerin soap is so malleable it easily melts with your body heat and will fill the hole much like a wood compound or putty.

If you have any mess just run quickly under water and scrub off - a little water may get under the label or packaging but it will dry out provided there is not a ton.

Make a fun label - joke about "good clean fun", "money laundering" or "cleaning out your bank account". Maybe make the scent "freshly laundered money", whatever you like and whatever fits your recipient best! Trace the shape of your soap onto your label and cut out that shape. Affix the label to your soap, or if you are using paper use and adhesive to attach (I used Spray 77). Done!

Have good clean fun with this project!

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Decorating and Maintaining: A Seasonal Wreath of Repurposed Materials and Wood Butter (with a label download)

Playing a little catch up here! We've been busy - not so much so that it is a huge stress but enough so that it is a distraction. Our little one is in school most mornings now, which leaves the dog ever more excited about the possibility of a long, solitary walk when I arrive home to work. We've been quite social as well, a nice change of pace and a comfortable one as well since everything has been within walking distance.

 Slathered in Wood Butter - keep reading!

One of our recent forays was a "Bacon Party", which really was just an excuse to give our "Book Club" that never has a book nor discusses it, some meaning again. There were bacon-wrapped jalapeños, bacon chocolate chip-peanut butter cookies, piles of candied bacon, bacon vodkas, and a whole other slew of things I can't remember. Honestly, I couldn't even eat that much and I am still way overloaded by the thought of bacon - a perfect cure for cravings.

With the help of a few great websites (thanks Barb!) and a local game/hunting store (where I found my curing salts, go figure) I was able to cure my own bacon painlessly and quickly. I tried three types and brought them to the party with a vegetarian accompaniment on the side: a plain maple-brown sugar (candied and served with fresh, hot Beignets*), a Maple Bourbon (served with a cranberry, pie spiced sour cream dip), and a Jalapeño Tequila (served with a fresh guacamole). It was a smash and the Jalapeño Tequila was the first to go - the guys loved the subtle but building heat. Thankfully, we have plenty more dried jalapeño left from last year's garden. Christmas presents, anyone?

*Note: I make these beignets with butter instead of shortening with great success. They are divine!

 Before - an older spoon and a newer rolling pin (from Herriott Grace - a favorite Christmas gift!)

While we were at the Bacon Party I passed along a gift to a dear friend who I so respect and have been continually inspired by, Erica. Erica is smart, grounded, and graciously humble - someday, maybe soon, she'll be a hands-in-the dirt farmer on her own property but for now she teaches others how to love and steward the beautiful world around us. I knew Erica's birthday was coming and I wanted to give her something that wasn't wasteful, that respected resources and encouraged her to love what she already has...I choose Wood Butter. Thankfully, it was the right choice, and Erica used it to condition her husband's homemade cutting boards (he's crazy talented).

 After Wood Butter application

Wood butter is a super simple, easy to make, cream-like concoction you can put on your wooden cooking utensils to treat, protect, and polish them. Since I make mine with food-grade oils and beeswax you can feel safe using it on spoons, cutting boards and the like. You may have also heard Wood Butter referred to as Spoon Oil and it has been kicking around the internet for a while - I think Wood Butter fits better and I have to admit to some revisions in my recipe. You see, I am very allergic to mineral oil, and most recipes call for mineral oil, so I substitute with olive or grapeseed oils. That said, if you choose to do this you must be diligent to dispose of anything that might smell off or rancid, as a rancid rubbed spoon is difficult to salvage. I also like my Wood Butter a bit more soft and smooth so I use a 5:1 ratio of oil to beeswax instead of a 4:1 ration recommended most places. It is easy enough to make and play around with so have a go at it!

Click the image or the link below to download and print these labels

For your gift giving ease I'm making a download of the labels I made for Erica's gift available here. Just print, clip, and in my case I punched a hole and tied on with twine. I prefer the wide-mouth, more shallow jars for this job - like these, not the ones pictures, but almost anything will work and old jam jars would be lovely and repurposed!

Fun for outside

Finally, this past week I popped together a quick seasonal wreath. I saw a big bag of old plastic Easter eggs at a resale shop and passed them by. That night I realized how I could reuse them and I couldn't get back there fast enough. While I'm not normally one for pastel, plastic wreaths, the opportunity was right there and I knew it would be a festive reuse.

Almost done - a last layer of smaller eggs covers up the hoop nicely!

To make the wreath inexpensive, as well as give it a backbone I choose an embroidery hoop. Not only do you get two wreath bases out of one hoop, it is also a compostable and more earth-friendly option. About 15 minutes and some hot glue later here I was left nearly done - just one final layer of smaller eggs to cover up the showing backbone.

A run to the store and a few more eggs to finish the piece and here is the finished product. Total cost? $3.95.

Fun for inside!

Don't want an egg wreath? That's ok - I have another super fun idea coming your way with a download in the not too distant future! So hold on to those Easter eggs , there will be a any-ol-holiday you want reuse coming down the pipeline.

Hope you are enjoying some of the same glorious weather we've been having. It's hard to get any work done but so lovely! Perhaps you are making some useful re-purposed crafts as well?

Thursday, March 8, 2012

3 Super Simple Organizing Tricks

A few quick and easy organizing tricks for you today. Maybe you already use similar techniques, maybe these will be new but if you have other great ideas be sure to share them as well!

First up - remote controls. Ick. Remote controls always seems to find a way of laying about all over the place and making a perfectly neat and tidy room look just a bit messy. We tried a universal remote once to no avail - it simply wasn't universal enough and at least one extra remote was needed to control the TV, stereo, DVD player, etc. What a mess!

This is my Craigslist victory piece de resistance

We store our TV in a large armoire, but this trick could work just fine in another application (on the back of the TV perhaps, on a shelf, whatever works for you).

Why yes, we do have a furry beast in the house. Why?

First, decide where you can hang your remotes in a way that will be inconspicuous and useful. On the back of each remote place a piece of velcro. I choose to put the soft side on the remote so it wouldn't pull on clothing when it is in your lap. I also used a heavier load-holding stronger velcro because one of our remotes is really heavy.

Put the companion disc (or square, whatever shape you use) piece to the velcro wherever you wish to hang your remotes. For us the inside of the door to the armoire is perfect - it doesn't touch the TV when closed, slides next to the TV when open and is high enough little hands can't reach.

We recently had to get a new microwave (over a year ago is recently, right? Right.) Inside the microwave was a rack. A totally useless rack. This rack doesn't make any sense. But as a drying rack it is pure genius.

When placed across our sink the rack overlaps enough to hold it in place. Skinny enough to fit just about anywhere it can be stored very easily - I can't say the same about our actual "dish drying rack".The very best application for the over the sink rack though is for stemware. Ever other rack I've ever used either left a puddle in the bowl of the glass or condensation inside - this though? Spotless. No film, no condensation.

Don't have a microwave rack? Try a cookie cooling rack!

I have a lot of loose spices that don't have any need to live in a jar - and shouldn't anyway. Mustard for example, because I love to make and can homemade mustard - but it has no reason to be in a designated spice container. I like using mini loaf pans to hold my spare spices and organize other ones.

The mini loaf pans are great for holding related items as well - in this case some of my various extracts and individual tea bags. Easy to grab, easy to find and easy to put back in an organized manner.

What are some of your favorite double duty or super smart organizing tricks?

Tuesday, March 6, 2012

Recipe: Spinach, Lentil and Roasted Sweet Potato Soup AND an eMeals Giveaway!

Spring is achingly close at hand. I can tell by the way I crave asparagus again, a desperate longing for asparagus in every form – young and tender, peeled into ribbons on a salad, crisp bites barely steamed with a squeeze of citrus, and raw even.

This year spring is making itself known early - earlier than it should, earlier than normal. It is treading a fine line that leaves you wondering if it is acceptable to revel in the delights, or fear for the plants and animals should winter have one last petulant outburst. I saw my first cardinal last week, resplendent in red ochre atop a bare tree.

The other birds have returned too, joining the black-capped chickadees in song – the herons, the red-winged blackbirds, and the swans. There is a hint of green in my garden – a few daffodils poking up to say hello. Most welcome though is the light. My face gets warm when I sit down to write and I have to adjust window shades more often. I have begun leaving the door open for the dog to come in and out for a few more moments each day and my craving for fresh vegetables is moving from a whimper to a roar inside me.

Every year, every spring, I crave vegetables obsessively. I go to the store, forgive myself for buying some exquisitely green head of lettuce shipped from half a world away and they fall flat, every time. I am left still craving, still unsatisfied until the local harvest comes into play and then, well…then I eat salads daily, I have asparagus at every meal, I devour strawberries nearly stem and all – my fingers stained red and an empty carton in hand before I’ve made it a block or so from the market. Eventually I grow sick of lettuce and beets, and I begin the work of saving the harvests at hand for later. For now though, I am craving and the green is calling to me.

It won’t be long now before we have bluebirds, woodpeckers, frogs groaning out the unsultriest of mating calls, and mosquitoes taking advantage of that perfect 7:00 hour, but, most of all, asparagus, and lettuce, and radishes, and garlic scapes, and markets and gardens and, and, and…abundance. Crisp, earthy, aromatic abundance. Yes. Spring is almost here.

This simple but satisfying soup speaks to my spring craving - it has the hearty fulfillment of a mid-winter food with the light and fresh flavors of spring. The sweet potato adds a nice complexity, the spinach a fresh flavor and the lentils a grounding force to bind it all together. Served with a nice crusty bread it is soul-satisfaction.

I'm also want to let you in on a little secret: I've been planning our monthly meals. I always wanted to plan our meals but it never stuck. This year though, I decided to recommit to my goal in earnest. I scoured around for a long time patching together a hodge podge of recipes from my favorite bloggers, cookbooks and old favorites. It took me ages to pull together a menu. Not now. I have a subscription to eMeals. I contemplated joining for a long time but finally took the plunge. I choose the Natural and Organic plan, as you might expect, because it featured more of the whole food recipes I would use.

All in all I am really, really pleased. Even with my meddling (I'm not exactly known to follow a recipe without some flourish) we’ve enjoyed the recipes I’ve selected. I can truly say that I have been able to stick to our meal plans now, stay closer to our food budget, and that I would buy an eMeals subscription again. I use my eMeals subscription as a supplement to my current planning strategy, but my guess is, if you followed the plan exactly – with the provided shopping lists, you would be about as happy as could be with minimal mealtime effort. The amazing weight of having a plan in place for dinner has made a major difference in my life, more so than I ever expected! Not having to think about meals means I have time to think about other things - like working on my own recipes, in earnest, and writing, freelance work, and getting life managed in other ways.

Thus, today's recipe is adapted from an eMeals menu item. I really think you'll enjoy it. We did - and the flavors really captured the craving I have for spring right now. The reaction? Well, I got thanked and thanked again - this was the meal that hit the spot for my husband and nourished my spring cravings. Really, that is what dinner is about - nourishing something deeper in everyone and bringing them together. Couldn't have planned it better myself!

Now, if you’ve been around here for a little while you know I am not a big giveaway person unless I really, really love a product. Well, exciting news! I do love eMeals and I contacted them to see if they would be willing to give away a subscription to a reader – Yes! So, leave a comment below telling me which of their 30 meal plan options you would like to try (thirty!) (and make sure I have a way to contact you) and you could win a 3-month eMeals subscription of your own! Deadline is March 15th at midnight central time.

Wanna win something else? Follow eMeals on Facebook and you could win a 12” Cast Iron Skillet – let me know in a comment and you can have an extra entry*.  If you are on Twitter you can give eMeals a follow and let me know below for an extra entry* as well! eMeals has a blog too – for your reading, simplifying and recipe perusing.

Spinach, Lentil and Roasted Sweet Potato Soup
Adapted from eMeals Natural and Organic Meal Plan #418
Serves 6

Note 1: This recipe is easily made vegetarian – simply omit the bacon and use 2 Tablespoons of oil and replace chicken broth with a vegetable broth. Adjust salt to your taste at the end.

Note 2: Roasting the sweet potatoes gives a nice crunch but, if you would like a softer and slightly more luxurious texture add the cubed sweet potato with the lentils in step 4 and skip roasting them altogether.

3 Tbsp Grapeseed Oil, divided (I prefer grapeseed to olive oil for its higher smoke point and neutral flavor but you can use either)
3 slices bacon, cut into 1/4 inch slices
3 cups mirepoix (1 cup each: diced onion, celery and carrot)
2 tsps dried thyme, divided
2 Bay leaves
1.5 cups lentils (I used brown)
4 cups chicken broth (or a 32 oz box)
2.5 cups water
5 oz (three good handfuls) baby spinach
1 Tbsp fresh lemon juice
1 tsp sea salt + more for seasoning
1 large sweet potato, cut into ½-1 inch cubes

Preheat oven to 350ºF.

In a large pot or dutch oven heat 1 Tablespoon oil over medium heat. Add bacon and cook until moderately crispy.

Add your mirepoix (onions, carrots, and celery), 1 teaspoon thyme and bay leaves to the bacon and rendered fat. Stir occasionally and cook for 8-10 minutes, softening the vegetables.

Add lentils, broth and water to the pot and bring to a boil. Once boiling reduce heat, cover and simmer for 40 minutes or until lentils are tender.

While soup is simmering toss sweet potato in remaining 2 Tablespoons of oil. Season with a healthy grind or two of sea salt and remaining 1 teaspoon of thyme. Roast in oven, tossing occasionally until tender and slightly browned, about 30-40 minutes.

When lentils are tender remove bay leaves. Using an immersion blender give a few pulses to puree some, but not all, of the soup. If you do not have an immersion blender then remove 2 cups of soup and puree in a blender then return to the pot, or omit blending completely.

Add spinach and lemon juice and stir soup well until spinach is incorporated and wilted. At this point, if you would like a more soupy-soup add additional water (I prefer a heavier, more stew like texture). Add salt to taste – I found 1 teaspoon to be a good amount but you can adjust to your preferences.

Ladle into bowls and serve with roasted sweet potatoes and a nice crusty hunk of baguette on the side.

* Don't have Twitter or Facebook? That's ok. Go to the eMeals site and check out a menu - let me know which recipes you might try for your extra entries, up to two.

Please note: I contacted eMeals (emeals.com) to request the giveaway, I was not compensated monetarily and not solicited to host this giveaway and all opinions and language is my own.
One winner will be selected at random.  If, after one week the winner cannot be contacted or does not respond a new winner will be selected. There are no restrictions based on location but you will need an internet connection and a valid email address to receive your subscription. Note: Above links do lead to a page where I can receive a referral credit for your purchase - if you do not wish to participate but want to purchase a subscription please go directly to emeals.com

Winner has been chosen! Thank you random.org...the winner is: Elizabeth D. Thanks Everyone!


text:
HomeItem CategoriesCustomer ServiceShopping CartWish List

Click here to view larger image
 Show Larger Image
 E-mail this product to a friend

Owl Family Portrait

      by: Heaven And Earth Designs

Cross Stitch Patterns

SKU: 13-1289
Stitch Count: 350w x 221h

Price: $19.00

Have a Question?
Share a Comment?

If you have a question or comment to share about this item please post it on the Chit Chat tab below!

You may also like these

Related Items:   Customers who like this also found these items interesting. You may too!

Black Panther

Curious Owl (w/btns)

Hooties Funky Owls

Chit Chat

Chit Chat:
Have a Question?
Got a comment?
Use ChitChat to share your thoughts or ask your question!
ChitChat is also a great way to share a picture of your completed project.
There is no chat posted yet for this item...
Have a question about this item?
Ask your question here! Your post will be viewed by members as well as our staff.   Posting product questions here is great because the answer can inform others who might be wondering the same thing.

Have a comment that might help others?
If you have stitched this design or used this item, tell us what you think!   We, as well as others interested in this item will appreciate your feedback.

Go ahead and Start the Discussion!


text:
I voted. And it didn’t really matter to anyone but me.

It is nearly midnight, the day after the U.S. elections.

The results were not, in my opinion at least, very shocking. Nate Silver correctly predicted how each state would vote – even the swing states. The rest went as they always did: much of the middle and the south were red; the entire left coast went blue, as did the Northeast.

Sometimes, life in this big, industrious land-of-opportunity can be quite predictable. It leaves you few suprises. And you find yourself feeling just a little bit like a caricature.

We are presently in the wee town of Portsmouth, New Hampshire. I have no photos yet, but it is lovely. We arrived just before a nor’easter; outside my hotel room window, the wind is whipping through empty streets, and snow is falling.

Earlier, as I drove Rand’s colleagues through the winding roads of the city center, past brick buildings and tiny shops with signs out front lettered in gold, someone noted that the northeast looked exactly as they had imagined.

Indeed, New England does not disappoint. It delivers on the promises made to us in movies and on TV.  There are lighthouses and fishing boats, cobblestone streets and old churches with tall, white steeples. There are foggy harbors and chilly winds, and warm cafes selling lobster rolls.

There are people here who sound just like the Kennedys. Hell, there are people here who are the Kennedys.

And there is something that, as a Pacific Northwesterner – is unfamiliar to me. It’s a kind of formality – a sort of strange regality – that hangs in the air. As crazy as it sounds, I think this part of the country feels this way because it’s older. It’s established and proper. I’ve seen men wearing dinner jackets.

My beloved hometown, by comparison, feels a bit like the long-haired, guitar-playing stoner. Which reminds me – yesterday in addition to going for Obama, Washington state also voted to legalize marijuana.

Cover of Wednesday’s Boston Globe. Apparently “2d” is an acceptable abbreviation for “second” and not a typo.

I’m sure you’re thinking that’s no big deal – lots of states have legalized medical marijuana, right? And you’d be absolutely right. But I’m not talking about medical marijuana. No. Last night, my home state voted to legalize recreational marijuana.

Oh, and gay marriage, too. Apparently the liberal little neighborhood in which we live became a dance party.

It makes me wonder; does our damp little corner of America, with its mild winters and scores of hipsters dancing in the streets, meet our tourists’ expectations, just as New Hampshire met ours? Do they see us walking down the street in our plaid shirts, warming our hands on our coffee cups, occasionally pushing our rain-streaked glasses further up on our noses? Do they hear us prattling on about local, sustainable, organicly-grown food as though there is no other topic on the planet more interesting?

And when they undoubtedly catch us living up to all those cliches, are they not at all suprised?

I know we’re complex – every single one of us. I know we aren’t all walking cliches. No one can predict our actions – we can’t even predict how we’re going to behave. When I was a teenager, I certainly couldn’t have imagined that I’d pick the lifelong running mate that I did.

His poll ratings ARE impressive.

But once every four years, the vast majority of us tend to live up to our stereotypes. Most of us fall into one box or the other, and even if we don’t, the people around us do. Our street or our neighborhood will go one way or the other. And if I’m to be really honest, I have to acknowledge that all the pains I take to get our absentee ballots in before our next trip doesn’t make a lick of difference.

That one ballot I put in the mail doesn’t change the outcome of things. It won’t make or break an election, and never has. Things do not come down to one vote. Not in my town. Not anywhere, really.

But I still keep doing it. Because it makes me feel like I’m a part of everything. It makes me feel like I’m  part of the joy, or part of the disappoint, or even part of the indifference.

It makes me feel like I’m out on the street, dancing with my neighbors*, even when I’m on the other side of the country.

*Or I might just be yelling at them to keep it down. But you get my point.

Share This Article

Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+
  • Mark

    Why does “His poll ratings ARE impressive” sound innocently and accidentally dirty…. 🙂 Awesome post as always. Hugs from California where we apparently love our taxes and want even more of them…sigh….

  • KillarneyT

    I am so excited that you are in Portsmouth, NH! That’s my neck of the woods (I work right down the street). Can’t wait to read the forthcoming posts! BTW, Ri Ra Irish Pub is a fun place to eat at night…

  • http://ferretingoutthefun.blogspot.com/ cosmoHallitan

    It was surreal watching the election coverage from Shanghai. We mailed in our ballots weeks ago and missed seeing all the political ads, so it never felt very real. And then I’m watching CNN here at noon and it’s 11pm election night there and instead of staying up late to find out the results I am enjoying a leisurely lunch. Again, surreal. And extremely proud to be an American, even a stereotyped one.

  • http://www.onetrailingspouse.com Emily McGee

    I really enjoyed this post because I was getting tired of all the preachy people on facebook talking about how we all need to vote and every vote matters. I like voting, but I’m a lot more pessimistic about it. I’m a super liberal northeasterner transplanted to one of those uber-conservative southern states. With that grand tradition of the electoral college still in place, my vote literally doesn’t make a difference.

    Also, love your take on New Englanders. I’m actually surprised you haven’t run into any plaid-wearing, coffee-toting, organic-loving people in Portsmouth yet.

  • Abby

    Oooh, Geraldine! Ye of little faith! Did you not watch Florida this year? Imagine if those deciding few votes hadn’t shown up to the polls, because they assumed it wouldn’t matter…

    PS Portsmouth is the best. Breaking New Grounds coffee and THE FRIENDLY TOAST (get something with whipped cream. just. do. it.) Flatbread Pizza. Lobster. Oh, the deliciousness!

    Born and Raised NH Girl

    • http://travelingmonkeys.org Deanna

      Yes! And a Moe’s, just for good measure.

  • http://travelingmonkeys.org Deanna

    Portsmouth is a little like a Kennedy and a Seattleite had a love child who smokes clove cigarettes. 😀 I’m so glad you like my hometown.

  • http://ashleyabroad.com/ Ashley of Ashley Abroad

    I tried to have my absentee ballot sent in the mail but it never showed up :(… great post by the way! It’s true that one vote doesn’t change the election, but it does matter in its own small way.

  • Rana

    Your vote might not matter for presidential races but it sure as hell does matter for state and local matters, especially on ballot measures. And often, the local elections are the ones that will most effect you. Think about property transfer taxes or library funding measures, those things often come down to just thousands of people. Gay marriage ballot measures are a really good example of this. They are often extremely close votes and you voting yes or no makes an absolutely huge difference in people’s lives.

  • http://www.boomeresque.com Just One Boomer (Suzanne)

    People died for the right to vote, so we vote. If we don’t vote, we can’t complain about the outcome.of the election. And yes, in presidential elections, if we live in a deep blue or a deep red state, it might feel as though it doesn’t matter if we vote, but I was feeling slightly nauseous there when it looked like Obama might win the electoral college, but not the popular vote, so thanks for voting anyway. I think the GOP might have shot itself in the foot in states like mine, Pennsylvania, where the Republican governor,legislature and election head tried to use legislation to suppress Democratic votes. There was a backlash, and Democratic voter turnout was higher than in 2008! First time votees were applauded at the polls. I worked as an attorney poll watcher. I was assigned to a Philadelphia electoral ward where a diverse collection of neighbors of different races, religions and ethnicities greeted eachother warmly and voted http://www.boomeresque.com/election-day-in-the-usa-what-could-go-wrong/

  • Kate A.

    I left my Rhode Island home for Pennsylvania recently. I really miss that New England feel — that one you can’t quite put your finger on — but reminds you of history and makes you feel proud at the same time. Lovely post. Enjoy the ‘lobstah’ (new England equivalent of lobster)!

  • http://www.travel-fearlessly.blogspot.com/ Christa Singleton

    Awesome post. Funny enough, we’re living in CT right now but we’re registered Washington voters (husband is military). This was our very first time voting and we were more excited about the marijuana and gay marriage amendments than the presidential election, for the very reasons that you stated. We just felt like our vote had a bigger impact at the state level than at the national level. Glad you guys are enjoying New England!

  • http://halfempty4now.com Ms. HalfEmpty

    I love your expression “lifelong running mate.” So poetic and apropos!

  • http://www.so-many-places.com Kim

    But your vote DOES matter because if you stopped, and other people stopped, then things could get ugly. But I know what you mean about feeling that voting unites us- it does. Makes me a little weepy even.

  • Rachel

    I have a dear friend from Tacoma Washington, and we met 10 years ago when he came out to Washington DC for college. I grew up on the East Coast and always used to puzzle over his very distinctly different-from-us style. Even now, a decade later still living in DC, his clothes are the same. He always wears an open flannel with a quirky t-shirt underneath, maybe an obscure band shirt or a clever joke or maybe just a superman logo.

    Then last year I flew into Sea-Tac for the first time. When I was getting my bags I realized that EVERYONE WAS DRESSED EXACTLY LIKE HIM. It was a delightful moment, suddenly I had found his context. I walked around Seattle and yes, it met my “East Coastiner” expectations exactly. So did the Tacoma pine trees with Rainier in the distance. The first Starbucks kinda disappointed, but Pike’s Place was way more fun than expected.

    That same friend is planning a January trip to visit me in my new Hawaii home. I wonder if I should warn him not to pack any flannels.

  • Jennifer Daly

    In our local paper today was a story of a man who tied another candidate in a city council race. The vote was something like 657 – 657. The kicker? The man’s wife didn’t make it to the polling place to vote. She had worked all day and her husband told her not to kill herself getting to the polling place by 6 since he was sure one vote wouldn’t matter.

    On the other hand, I live in a state that votes red ever presidential election. I still get in line to make sure my little blue vote is heard. It counts to me! And heck, what if the one year I don’t bother ends up being the year things might have changed?!

    Thanks as always for the fun and funny post Geraldine.

  • Colleen

    I lived in Littleton, NH for eight years. It was nothing like the New England I imagined. Of course, I was seventeen when I moved there, so I basically pictured Salem, MA from images I’d seen in ‘Hocus, Pocus.’ But I seriously miss those snowstorms, and listening to the wind blow and watching the flurries fall. I voted this year, and I was seriously overjoyed to have my vote count for something.

  • Megan

    I love your blog so much and was excited to hear you were in Milwaukee…but still no Mil-town post 🙁 hope it’s going up soon, i can’t wait to her what you thought of the city!!

  • https://bethstravelsinitaly.blogspot.com Beth

    I LOVED this blog post but have to disagree with the premise – one of my friends in a local race lost by 11 votes. Every vote does matter!

  • http://73percentnerd.blogspot.com/ Esben

    You are right on, again! New England is just the way we all imagine it. And similarly, so is the Northwest. In fact, when I first visited Seattle last fall, all of the cliches started flooding to mind about life in your part of the country. Mind you, I usually don’t think of any area or any area in stereotypes. However, actually walking the streets of Seattle, I gotta tell ya that I now know the inspiration for them.

    Thanks for sending me the leads on places to eat in your fine city. I am sad to report that I did not get to investigate them this time ’round. My business trip ended up being busier than I expected and took us out of the city every day.

    Cheers and Aloha!

  • http://www.blueinn.com S

    Love Portsmouth! You should make your way down to Newburyport and Plum Island, MA. (Only about half an hour on 95 S.) There’s a fabulous little inn on the beach to stay at on the island.

  • http://www.mylesdannhausen.com Myles

    In my handful of sojourns to the Northwest it has, indeed, lived up to my Northwesterly expectations. Boise was a city full of Yakima boxes; Portland resided somewhere comfortably to the left of Wellstone, and a little more laid back than a corpse; Utah was beautiful…and borderline scary; the Oregon ocean was cold and wandering the coast felt like stepping into The Goonies. I had the same impression of the Northeast when I visited Boston as Sandy hit – for a Midwesterner it always feels very surreal to walk through my grade-school history books. Great post.

  • http://www.findingnoon.com Sylvia

    yes, yes, voting is important. But the truly crucial question is, did everyone obey the 10 commandments of road trip? No inappropriate winds were broken?


text:
Union Flite Lady Snowboard Bindings - New Demo - Women's 2014

sku# 77312
Union - Flite Lady Snowboard Bindings - New Demo - Women's 2014
Model Info
Zoom Enlarge
This item is

Out of Stock

But fear not - there is plenty to explore...

Shop all Union Shop sale Union

Product Info

A binding so light it would float away on its own, the Union Flite Lady Snowboard Bindings are the choice for chicks looking for a simple yet highly durable binding without all the unnecessary fluff. Don't hold back with these bindings, they're built to last with the Dupont™ Zytel® ST Highbacks and Extruded Anodized Aluminum Heelcups that Union has pioneered in strength. The Flite baseplates give this women-specific binding what it's known for, a featherweight feel so you're not dragged down or held back anywhere on the mountain. The Flite Lady is a prime example of one of Union s savvy designs. *This is a new demo product used only for show. It has never been used but may have slight cosmetic wear from transit.*

Product Details

Flite BaseSuper lightweight, freestyle oriented design, made out of Dupont™ Zytel® ST with a Lifetime warranty.

Dupont™ Zytel® STThe highest-quality nylon, used on all Union baseplates, results in strength, safety, security and the confidence of a lifetime warranty. All in a women's specific package.

Injected EVA BushingsThe bushings dampen underfoot vibrations to promote a more comfortable ride and a smooth, even board flex with no dead spots.

Direct-Connect Strap SystemSimply and directly connect your straps for a simple and quick strap that won't come undone.

Injected Aluminum BucklesFast in, and fast out. Union aluminum is second-to-none.

All-New Toe Buckle System with Push-PinEasy to adjust, this toe buckle system offers premium hold and customization.

Flite HighbacksPipe, park and pow. A well-rounded freestyle driven designed highback.

Quick-Adjust Forward LeanTool-free-adjuster allows on-the-fly foward lean adjustment

Additional Features

Extruded Anodized Aluminum HeelcupsThe strongest and most versatile aluminum heelcup on the market, extruded aluminum comes out 100% pure and maintains its true shape no matter how much wear and tear you inflict. Also, every Union heelcup undergoes an anodizing process—reinforcing the already bombproof apparatus with 30% more strength.

Universal DisksCompatible with any traditional 4x4 mounting system and 3-hole board patterns. Channel Compatible Discs are available separately from Union to fit Burton snowboards with The Channel.

Grade 8.8 HardwareThe most commonly used hardware is made from "mild steel" that has a property class of only 4.6. Considering how much stress a binding goes through, Union uses only the highest-strength steel, with a property class of 8.8.

  • Ability Level: Intermediate-Advanced More
  • Flex Rating: Medium More
  • Binding Style: Strap
  • Warranty: Limited Lifetime

Other Notes

Union products can only be shipped within the United States


text:
Startup Pitches Power Savings

By John G. Spooner  |  Posted 2006-05-15 Print this article Print

Technology tunes chips' clock speed

Chip startup multigig says its got an answer to rising data center power bills.

The 12-employee company, which emerged from stealth mode on May 8, has created new processor clock technology that it says can halve power consumption by recycling most of the electricity used to regulate processor clocks.

The technology, which Multi-gig is offering up for interested parties to license, arrives at a time when concerns about computers electrical consumption are on the rise for many large businesses.

Whereas todays chips use a series of PLLs (phase-locked loops) and inverters to arrive at a frequency and distribute it internally, Multigig deploys a grid of self-oscillating circuits, each made up of transmission lines in the form of a square. The grid allows the circuits to work in concert to regulate clock speed. Although the grid approach still uses an external PLL to set chip speed, it uses less power because of the way the clock signals are distributed.

Multigigs grid approach, called RotaryWave, still sets a chips clock speed on the signal from an external PLL, but it uses less power because it changes the way in which those clock signals are distributed inside each chip.

Changing the approach saves power because, by recycling electricity, it then has to add only enough power to overcome losses from resistance in the wires used to form each square, said Haris Basit, chief operating officer of Multigig, in Scotts Valley, Calif.

Multi-gig appears to have a bright future, as company officials said Multigig is working with brand-name chip makers that are, at a minimum, evaluating its technology.

Companies have been going to great lengths to hold down power consumption in their latest processors while also boosting performance.

Chip power consumption normally increases as clock speeds move higher. Intel, for example, redesigned its forthcoming Core Architecture chips to run at lower speeds while getting more work done per clock cycle.

For Multigig, however, "it doesnt work that way. Our relationship to frequency is not as close," Basit said.

Thus, if a chip maker were to successfully implement Multi-gigs technology, officials said, chips could be made to use even less power or to run faster while keeping their power.

Still, even if it were licensed by a big-name company, Multi-gig technology would take time to make its way into products like server processors, given the design tinkering that would need to take place, Basit said.

Timing Is Everything

Multigig officials say its RotaryWave processor clock technology could someday be used to cut processor power consumption in half. The technologys benefits include:

* Recycling RotaryWave reuses electrical clock timing signals instead of discharging them. Thus, existing chips can be made to use less power, and new ones could be made faster without associated power gains.

* Lockdown RotaryWave clocks are able to self-synchronize, meaning a grid of the clocks can stay in sync without additional signaling, which would use power.

* Easygoing RotaryWave is compatible with major chip manufacturing technologies including CMOS, used to make processors, and with SiGe (silicon germanium) BiCMOS for communications chips. It also tolerates electrical noise from power supplies and other sources.

John G. Spooner John G. Spooner, a senior writer for eWeek, chronicles the PC industry, in addition to covering semiconductors and, on occasion, automotive technology. Prior to joining eWeek in 2005, Mr. Spooner spent more than four years as a staff writer for CNET News.com, where he covered computer hardware. He has also worked as a staff writer for ZDNET News.

Submit a Comment

Loading Comments...
Manage your Newsletters: Login   Register My Newsletters

Rocket Fuel