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Friday, March 29, 2013

The power we wield!

Last Friday, I was up to my eyes in edits for #6 in my Dylan Scott series. I took a five- minute break to check Twitter and one tweet made me snort with laughter. The tweet in question was from our own lovely Maureen Miller (aka Gladys) who included me in her #FollowFriday suggestions and described us as future world leaders. At that time, I couldn’t have led the way out of a paper bag but I was more than grateful for the laugh.

I continued with my edits. Deadly Shadows, coming to a device near you in October, has a few dead bodies in it and my editor had expressed her regret that one particular character, a young girl, had met her end. I’d enjoyed writing the girl’s story and I, too, was sad to see her die. We all know, however, that in crime/mystery fiction, the good as well as the bad are murdered. Besides, there was no way round it. We’d have to live with it.

Cue sleepless nights. I thought about giving the character more flaws. That way, I reasoned, readers would be less upset about her death. Nope - it didn’t work. Cue yet more sleepless nights and long, long walks with the dogs. From nowhere the germ of an idea came to me. Maybe, just maybe, there was a way round it after all.

It has involved a lot of rewriting, a lot of blood, sweat and tears, but I’ve found the way round it. Now, as much as I like killing people off in my books, I’ve discovered that it’s even more exciting to bring them back to life.

Deadly Shadows still has a fairly high number of dead bodies but the young girl lives. Yay!

So Glady’s tweet wasn’t as laughable as I first thought. Not only can I murder people in the most cunning of ways, I can bring them back to life if I so choose. What power! Barack Obama? David Cameron? Bill Gates? Pah. As soon as I’ve had a coffee and a cupcake, I’m going to lead the world!

Shirley Wells lives in the UK with her husband and a selection of deranged pets. Her Dylan Scott series   of mysteries is available from Carina Press and all good etailers.

Wednesday, March 27, 2013

In a recent blog comment, Carina author, Julie Moffett, quoted Winston Churchill’s, “Success consists of going from failure to failure without loss of enthusiasm.”  That struck a chord, reminding me of a recent conversation with six close friends.  About a dozen years ago, we formed a discussion group to talk about issues relating to women.  Girl talk with a purpose.  Or so we like to think.

At the meeting I have in mind, we decided to talk about sex.  All of us are married and collectively have given birth to 18 children (I contributed 2 of the 18.), so we felt pretty well armed for the discussion.  With a lot of laughter in between comments, we agreed that we understood sex’s importance to men, but what about women?  What is their pleasure?

As we probed deeper into the subject (comma!), Eleni, who is from Athens, brought up the Greek roots of two key words she said are part of any good sexual experience--whether one is male or female--ecstasy and enthusiasm.

Here goes:  ecstasy combines “ex” meaning out of with “stasis” meaning body.  During sex, the body is left behind—presumably in a tangle of bedclothes—while the spirit soars free.  “Got that?” Eleni asked.

Enthusiasm is a parallel emotion.  “En” means in; “thus” is a version of theos or god and “asm” is breath.  So broken into pieces and put back together, enthusiasm is the breath of the spirit within us.  And, as Eleni claims, you ain’t got ecstasy if you ain’t got enthusiasm.

While our discussion didn’t solve the topic question, it was a lot of fun and left me with a deeper appreciation of two wonderful words.  For a kind of out-of-body experience does occur when a writer soars on a passage that’s coming together flawlessly.  From time to time, we’ve all felt that fleeting presence of the muse, haven’t we?  And when we’re stone-walled, without a single idea of how to move the plot forward, isn’t enthusiasm for our craft what keeps us going even after we’ve gone from failure to failure and had to hit the delete button again and again?

Anyway, I’m going to pour myself a glass of wine and talk all this over with Deva Dunne.  She’s been very busy in Killer Kitchens, what with her day job as an interior designer and also amateur sleuthing for Lieutenant Rossi—whether he wants her to or not. But until the book comes out on April 15th she has time to relax a little and listen to some “e” words.

BTW, to see what Deva’s up to lately, visit her at and read the opening chapter of Killer Kitchens.  There’s a brief bio of Jean posted there too, but personally I find Deva far more interesting.

Monday, March 25, 2013

Expectations: Help or Hinder?

I don't know about you, but I try to practice what I preach. Of course, sometimes it's easier said than done. I tell my daughter not to expect things. Go into a new experience with an open mind, make the best of it and let it play out the way it's supposed to. It's kind of like going to a movie. Don't you hate when you go to a movie that you've heard glowing reviews about and you leave thinking "meh?" But when you go to a movie that you know nothing about and end up having a great time, you get so happy you feel like you might smile for hours?

Take our careers for instance. We all strive to be the best we can be (in an author's case, to write the best book we can every day), but how do our expectations help or hurt us? If I expected to be a NY Times Best Seller, I might be waiting my whole life, not to mention be hugely disappointed if I never made it there. That might very well affect my writing which might affect future books. But if I go into a book, concentrating on my expectations for that ONE book and make it the best it can be and move on, then my expectations can be met (more easily). Let's face it, there are a TON of great books out there that never make lists for many reasons. Poor marketing, lack of promo...there are so many factors involved. Not to mention luck and timing.

I bring this up because in mid-March I attended the SoCalRWA Writers Conference and met Barbara Vey. I'd met her briefly years ago at an RWA conference, but never really had the chance to sit down and talk to her. Of course, I'd always (and only) heard lovely things about her and was thrilled to discover they are all true. She's fun and honest, very refreshing and I'll toss in delightful for good measure. (It all fits!) I was beyond thrilled when she asked to interview me for her Publishers Weekly Beyond Her Book Blog. What really floored me was her invitation to be one the authors at her Readers Appreciation Luncheon next April in Milwaukee. Talk about exceeding my expectations! (Of which, I should stress, I had none! BTW - Here is a shot of us after I moderated her workshop on Building Reader Loyalty.)

When you think about it, I have a conflict actually. How does my "no expectations" work with my publishing goals? I've been on this writer's road for thirteen years now and am doing the best I can to keep up with the job. (Sometimes it's overwhelming and sometimes it's pure bliss.) If I don't expect to make a list, but a list is my goal, then will I ever make it? I guess the answer is in the Universe somewhere...unless any of you can help me with it.

Let me know, what are your views on expectations vs. goals?

Dee J. Adams lives in Southern California with her husband, teenage daughter and 2 rescue dogs. Her Adrenaline Highs series is available at Carina Press and wherever e-books are sold.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Most writers toy with the idea of taking a pen name at one time or another. Whether it’s because your name is unpronounceable (Józef Teodor Konrad Korzeniowski aka Joseph Conrad) or because of bias against your gender in the genre in which you write (Alice Bradley Sheldon, who wrote SF as James Tiptree, Jr.), there are as many different reasons for writing under a pen name as there are, well, pen names.
Maybe your last book didn’t do so well, for instance. You might want to ditch the sales history by starting fresh under a new name. Some writers prefer to write their naughty stories under a pen name. Dean Wesley Smith wrote an article on pen names that gives a brief history of pen names and expands on the many reasons a writer might choose to use one.
So far, I have only one pen name: Emma Faraday. And it’s clearly not a secret. I decided to create a pen name to keep the different genres in which I write separate. Under Emma Faraday, I publish science fiction and fantasy. Under Marcelle Dubé, I publish mostly mystery. Using different names gives the reader a clue to the kind of story he or she can expect. That way, a reader looking for some of my fantasies won’t pick up one of my mysteries by mistake and be disappointed.
Writers, do you use pen names (that you’re willing to divulge)? Readers, are you aware of all the pen names of your favourite writers?
Below, I’ve compiled a quick list of pen names and the real names of the writers. Feel free to add to it!
Pen Name                  Real Name
Acton Bell                           Anne Brontë
Currer Bell                          Charlotte Brontë
Ellis Bell                              Emily Brontë
Boz                                      Charles Dickens
Lewis Carroll                      Charles Lutwidge Dodgson
Richard Castle                   Richard Alexander Rodgers
George Eliot                      Mary Ann Evans
O. Henry                             William Sydney Porter
Hergé                                  Georges Remi (Belgian writer/artist of the Tintin series)
George Orwell                   Eric Arthur Blair
Lewis Padgett                    Henry Kuttner and C.L. Moore (husband and wife team of SF writers)
J.D. Robbs/Jill March       Nora Roberts
Lemony Snicket                 Daniel Handler
Barbara Vine                      Ruth Rendell

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

Pirates, Tramps and Thieves...

by Janis Patterson
I’ve had it. Dealing with pirates has become too much of a part of a writer’s life. No, don’t think galleons and romantic figures in worn velvet and torn lace – these are modern thieves. They take books, books which writers have worked for months, perhaps years, on and post them on the internet for free. To add insult to injury, some even charge a ridiculously low price for them – money that the writer, the creator of the work, will never see.
A third kind of pirate is oddly becoming less and less rare – the plagiarizing pirate. This particularly loathsome specimen of lowlife merely takes another writer’s book, changes the main characters’ names and perhaps eye colors, and maybe – if they are conscientious – the name of the main town, then republishes the book under her own name with a new title and cover.
The first two kinds of pirates I can understand – if not condone – because both come down to simple money. The first kind just wants to hand the book around without anyone having to pay. The second kind wants some money for himself but without having to have to do anything to earn it. Both are despicable, but their reasons are obvious.
The third kind is a mystery. There are penalties for copyright infringement. Do they really think that no fan (the stolen books are invariably from popular and well-known authors) will notice the similarities? Due to the first two kinds of pirates books from unknowns don’t make that much, so it can’t be for the relatively small amount of money they earn. They are the ones doing the stealing, so they know they didn’t really write the book, unless they think just changing the names and eye colors constitutes writing. All that is left is that they appear to the world as a Published Author. Is that so wonderful that it is worth risking humiliation and legal repercussions? I guess so to them. Every so often there’s another one.
As pathetic and annoying as these egoist plagiarists are, though, they are small potatoes compared to the first two kinds. Their numbers are increasing exponentially and there’s very little that can be done about it.
Part of the problem began back in the days when paper was all you could get. It has never been difficult to find used copies for very little in a used book store, or for next to nothing at a garage sale. This too is blatantly unfair to the writer, but until recent years the technology for fair recompense was lacking. Nowadays the technology is there (think ISBN) but no one except the writer is interested in the writer getting paid for resale of their work. Paper copies have always been traded and resold and the modern naïf thinks that electronic books are no different. They refuse to acknowledge that there is a big difference – used paperbacks are self-limiting. Given enough time and enough readings they will dissolve. Ebooks can be copied with just a button-push or two, and the millionth copy will be just as pristine as the first. All with no benefit to the author, who created the story.
This ease of duplication was not lost on the second, money-driven type of pirate. To them each keystroke was the sound of a cash register as they made free money on the work of others. Every day writers spend valuable time – time that would be better spent writing more books – sending down takedown notices to pirates. Lucky writers have publishers who pursue takedowns. Others are not so fortunate and must do it themselves, as must self-published authors.
Sometimes the crooks comply, sometimes they don’t. Sometimes when their payment protocol is disrupted the site vanishes only to reappear a few days later with a very similar name and the same list of books. As so many authors have said, it’s like playing whack-a-mole and so frustrating and time consuming that some authors have simply given up, claiming that the pirated books are to be counted as free advertising.
I will admit that I have a number of free books on my Kindle, but a book given freely by the author as a promotional offer is a totally different thing from a book taken, i.e. stolen, without permission or recompense by a third party. Many authors have used a free book as a sales tool, but the important thing is that the choice to give the book away has been only theirs.
There have always been cheats, however, and there have always been thieves. Perhaps the most frightening thing about this uncomfortable world of piracy is the attitude of entitlement which surrounds it. On several ‘file-sharing’ sites I have seen posts where those who take these free files deny that they are doing anything wrong! If it’s on the internet, they say, it should be free. Others, more bold, decry the idea that copyright equals ownership. Copyright, to them, means only bragging rights for having written it – if that – and that it is greedy and wrong of the authors who are all obviously very wealthy to want to be paid for their work.
One man’s sublimely self-serving comments stayed with me. Roughly he said – “I pay for my entertainment as much as I can. I buy what I want until I don’t have any more money, but then my appetite for entertainment is so large that I have to take free stuff to get all that I want.” Wonder how far that philosophy would get him at the grocery or the hardware store?
And that brings us to the worst part of this unholy trade. There are penalties for illegally acquiring software. There are penalties for illegally downloading movies and TV shows. Books? Who cares? Apparently no one other than the authors who see their income being ripped away. Obviously not the thieves. The law doesn’t seem to want to be bothered.
So where does all this end? I postulate that it will end in chaos, as disintegrating systems usually do. Contrary to popular belief, most professional and popular authors write for money. Not for the feeling of self-accomplishment, not for the thrill of seeing their name on a book, but for money. It’s a job. A job they may love, but still a job. When that job ceases to be remunerative, they will stop writing and find something else.
Oh, there will always be books, but books written by those who do not regard it as a profession. Those who want to see their name on a book no matter what. Those who want the fame of being a published author. And let’s face it, those kinds of books are usually lousy. The quality of books will go down as more and more professionals leave the business and eventually the glory-seekers will be pretty much the sole providers of novels.
Apocalyptic? Perhaps, but dentists don’t do crowns just for the thrill of being recognized as a dentist. Mechanics don’t give free tune-ups because they enjoy playing in an engine. I can’t think of any profession that gives away its product just because they have it. They expect fair recompense for their goods/skills. Why do people regard writers any differently?
It looks to be a bleak future, with one rather deliciously snarky exception. Something I’ve been noticing is a lot of the pirate sites have been exposed as simple phishing sites that take the buyer’s credit card information and give nothing but a big bill.
Karma, it’s wonderful!

          Janis Patterson is a seventh-generation Texan and a third-generation wordsmith who writes mysteries as Janis Patterson, romances and other things as Janis Susan May, children’s books as Janis Susan Patterson and scholarly works as J.S.M. Patterson.

Monday, March 18, 2013

Lethal Business

How do you separate yourself from the characters you write? Or do you?

That was the question I was asked recently on another forum. Well, with my Hunter Files series it’s easy to draw the line, mainly because they’re written in the first person from a male point of view and I’m all woman! Not surprisingly, that creates a few problems because…well, I don’t want to get into the ‘men are from Mars, women are from Venus’ mind set thing, but I do believe our brains are wired differently.

That said, I had a good idea of the sort of man I wanted my hero, Charlie Hunter, to be. Tough, resourceful, cynical and emotionally damaged by his traumatic youth. (He saw his mother gunned down in front of him, which would be enough to screw with anyone’s head).

In Lethal Business the third in the Hunter Files Trilogy released by Carina Press today, Charlie doesn’t quite know what he’s got himself involved with when, returning from France in his boat early one morning, he witnesses an explosion at sea. The vessel nearest to the stricken craft then callously runs the survivors down and Charlie unable to forget what he’s seen.

The idea for Lethal Business struck me when I was watching the results of the last general election in England. All the pundits seemed surprised by the popularity of the smaller nationalist parties, which is how my fictional English National Party was born. Mind you, I’m sure that real life politicians wouldn’t behave nearly as badly as my ENP do in order to grab hold of power, would they…

Here’s how Carina describe Lethal Business –

Why kill the survivors of a sinking ship?

A speeding boat rams a life raft, leaving no survivors. A man embroiled in an investigation of potential suicide bombers disappears...

Retired inspector Charlie Hunter's belief that the two events are related leads him to accept a job working a charter between England and France. The only way to find out the truth is to be the man on the inside.
But Charlie's life is at risk on the rough Channel. All is not as it seems on the shifting seas, and some players are holding secrets that will change the game...and the sunken life raft is the key.

Lethal Business – Available now from Carina Press, and all on-line etailors.

Friday, March 15, 2013

Animals In Mysteries

I’m not a pet owner but I do love animals, especially dogs. I’ve always envied the special bond that pet owners have with their pets. So it only seems natural when animals show up in mysteries as the unofficial sidekicks of sleuths solving every kind of mystery from the magical to the small town whodunit. Whether or not a sleuth’s pet is an active participant in solving a mystery, or is just there to give moral support, pets play an important role in many mysteries. Here are some of my favorites.

Rex the Hamster (Stephanie Plum)-Though we only ever read about Rex running around in circles on the wheel in his cage, he’s always a source of comfort to Stephanie Plum when her life goes haywire, which is all the time.

Hedwig the Owl (Harry Potter)-Mostly used to deliver mail, Hedwig was a gift to Harry from Rubeus Hagrid and became Harry’s loyal companion in the wizarding world.

Backup the Pit Bull (Veronica Mars)-We never saw him very often, but beefy Backup was snarky teen sleuth Veronica Mars’ muscle and always had her back. BTW, if you’re a Veronica Mars fan, you’ll want to check this link out!

Fluffy the Chihuahua (Sierra Lavotini)-Fluffy was the child with fur of wisecracking exotic dancer/amateur sleuth Sierra Lavotini and could usually be found riding shotgun during her investigations.

Toby the Jack Russell Terrier (Peter Grant)-London police constable Peter Grant inherited Toby from a murder victim and Peter takes the magic sensing pooch with him when he becomes the apprentice of the last registered wizard in England.

Mahalia the Siamese Cat (Kendra Clayton)-Full disclosure: this is my mystery series and Mahalia actually belongs to Kendra’s landlady. In fact, Kendra and the cat hate each other. But Mahalia was once instrumental in helping Kendra solve a crime so I felt she deserved a mention.

What are your favorite animals in mysteries?

Angela ; )

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

5 Things to Improve Your Writing -- and Your Life -- Right Now

1 – Make time to read for pleasure. Once your own writing career takes off, reading for pleasure is one of the first things to go. When we do read, it’s either for research, to critique for a friend, or for reviewing purposes (which ultimately amounts to marketing and promotion – not really all that relaxing). Our love of reading was how we got into the writing biz. To lose that pleasure, that joy, would be a real shame. Find time – make time – to read with no purpose beyond your own entertainment.

2 – Get off your…couch. If you’ve ever been to a writing convention you know that writers, as a breed, are not the most health conscious of individuals. We spend a lot of time sitting on our posteriors doing repetitive wrist movements. Er, that would be typing. Well, hopefully more than typing; hopefully, it’s writing. But either way, we have sedentary jobs that are especially hard on our backs and our wrists. That’s bad enough, but there is some pretty disturbing research to support the theory that sitting all day is hazardous to your health

3 – Make time for the people in your life. We spend a lot of time with imaginary people. Our characters say and do exactly what we need them to. After a time it’s easy to start expecting real people to be just as cooperative. It’s not only good for our emotional and mental well-being to spend time with our loved ones. It’s good for our writing to get out there and observe humans being human.

4 – Eat your veggies. One thing you should never be guilty about is buying the best food you can afford -- and taking time to eat it. Eating right not only fuels your body, it fuels your brain. Don’t skip meals. It slows your metabolism and tempts you into binging later on junk food. Treat your body right and it’ll serve you and your career well.

 5 - Turn down the occasional project. That probably sounds crazy, but if you’re like me, you’re taking on too many projects anyway. You probably accept every project that comes your way – when you aren’t actively seeking them out. Plan your writing year at least one to three years in advance, leave a little latitude for creative impulse, and then stick to your schedule. If you continually overbook yourself, you’ll drain the creative well as well as your joy in the work. If you were setting off on a cross country journey would you try to run at top speed the entire way or would you try to pace yourself? Pace yourself. Turning down the occasional offer gives you a wonderful sense of both freedom and control.

Monday, March 11, 2013

Villains—A Battle of the Sexes

As writers and readers of romantic suspense, thrillers and mysteries we’re all familiar with villains. They come in varied shapes and sizes, from different backgrounds, and can be male or female.

When a writer builds a villain they:

1. Give them motivation for their actions (even if the character’s thinking is skewed).

2. Give them a few good points to go with all the bad stuff because this makes the character more rounded and maybe a bit likeable.

3. Give them a great name because every character deserves a great name.

4. Give them a similar conflict to the hero or heroine, but a different way to solve their problems.

5. Steer clear of clichés!

But when it comes to sex, that’s when a writer can change things up. After all, men are from Mars and women come from Venus. J

A female villain:

1. She can use her sex appeal, her feminine wiles to get exactly what she wants. Seduction and sex as a weapon.

2. She can exert force and use guns, knives and other weapons to meet her goal, but she’s more likely to use subtlety.

3. She can act ruthlessly and without remorse.

4. She can be cute and sweet and have an inner core of steel. Think of some of those Southern Belles!

5. She does manipulation with flare.

6. She’s excellent at multi-tasking and is extremely intelligent.

Examples of Female Villains:

1. Annie Wilkies in Misery (movie and book)
2. Cruella de Vil in One Hundred and One Dalmatians
3. Alex Forrest in Fatal Attraction – that poor bunny!
4. The Evil Queen in Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs
5. Miranda Priestly in The Devil Wars Prada

A male villain:

1. He’s more likely to be upfront rather than sneaky. In most circumstances he won’t beat around the bush or aim for subtlety.

2. He’s more likely to carry out the tasks himself rather than delegate because he likes to control the situation.

3. He’s good at planning and strategy, especially if he has a military/police background.

4. He’s usually experienced with different types of weapons.

5. He’s intelligent and doesn’t make the same mistake twice.

6. He’s more likely to use brute force.

Examples of Male Villains:

1. Jack Randall in Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander series.
2. Darth Vador in Star Wars.
3. Lash in JR Ward’s Black Dagger Brotherhood.
4. James Ardmore in The Pirate Next Door by Jennifer Ashley.
5. Dr. Zachary Smith in Lost in Space.
6. Gollum in Lord of the Rings

Male or female, I’m sure we agree that the character needs to be multi-faceted, motivated and interesting. He or she shouldn’t become a laughable cardboard cutout. Here’s a link to an article on Creating a Credible Villain that gives some great tips and another link about questions to ask your villain character.

Do you prefer reading/writing male or female villains? Do you have any fictional favorites? Is there anything that makes you cringe when it comes to villains?

Note – This post was inspired by a guest post at my blog written by Carol Van Atta, The Female Villain: She’s Alive, Well and Ready to bite.

Shelley Munro lives in New Zealand with her husband and a rambunctious puppy. To learn more about Shelley and her books visit her website at

Friday, March 8, 2013

What if...

It's a phrase that sums up what so many authors start with.

What if a tornado lands a confused young girl from Kansas in a faraway land with no way to get home but with the help of an inaccessible magician?

What if a giant shark terrorizes a Long Island beach community and the small town sheriff is forced to deal with the creature?

What if a detective must find out who killed a man on a train when half the passengers had a motive for the murder?

Get the idea? When I sit down and start plotting out a book, I always ask myself the 'what if' question. If I can't put my plot into that single sentence, I am not doing my job and chances are, I will not be able to plot out a decent book. Sometimes that question is short and simple while other times is a run-on sentence. But whatever the 'what if' is, it should be clear and the reader should care about the question. After all, the question begins with a 'quest.'

What if the ghost of a murdered woman appears to her brother and begs him to seek justice for her killer by enlisting the help of a psychic? This is the premise of my just released paranormal romantic suspense novella, Spirited Seduction.

What if a woman with a checkered past finally finds happiness but a stalker threatens to destroy the new life she's built for herself? This is the question posed in my other brand new book, Dance for Me.

What are some of your favorite What if's?

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Success is a routine?

I'm not sure where I heard it, but recently I heard someone say, "Success is a routine".

Do you agree with that?

I had to think about it for a while to decide whether I did. Finally I decided that my belief is this:

Routine can set you up for success.

For example:

A basketball player who routinely practices foul shots has a greater chance at making them (success).

A musician who practices a song over and over again has a better chance of performing it well in front of an audience (success).

An actress who rehearses is better prepared than one doing a cold reading.

A writer who writes regularly (even if it's in twice a month writing binges) has a better chance of finishing a project.

The basketball player can still miss the shot.

The musician can hit a wrong note.

An actress can forget a line.

A writer can write a story that never sees the light of day.

I train for half-marathons. I've completed three. I'm tortoises-pass-me, slow. Yet the routine of training, which I plan out in a calendar MONTHS ahead of time,  pushing myself to go slightly farther each week, sets me up for success. It allows me to cross the finish line.

Sometimes I feel like I'm doing the same with my writing. Slogging along, week after week, until I reach "The End" and then I start it up again...hoping that this time I'll be a little bit faster, a little bit stronger, a little bit better. I plan that out too, MONTHS or a YEAR ahead of time, which helps me to say on track day-to-day, week-to-week, month-to-month.

What do you think? Do you have a routine you follow to increase your chances of success? Do you have any tips you can share?

My tip is: EMBRACE YOUR CALENDAR! (but not literally because that could give you a paper cut)

Just an FYI, next week I’m releasing THE HITWOMAN GETS LUCKY. The novella will be free for a limited time, so be sure to visit to find out all the details and download your copy.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Risking failure

Our old house was on a dead-end street, a nice long quiet road with trees and kids and people who mostly observed the speed limit. For the longest time, when I drove in and out of our neighborhood, I’d see a teenaged boy practicing skateboard tricks—or rather the same trick—over and over.

He’d do the set-up, launch—and fail miserably.

But he didn’t give up and eventually I saw him nail the move. It didn’t happen overnight. It was a gradual process. Instead of succeeding once in a hundred times, it would be one in ten and then most of the time, he jump and spin and pick up his board. Smile. And practice it again.

And after a while, he’d start on a new skill, a new trick. And fail miserably.

I can’t count the number of times I thought, a girl would never do that.

Not the practicing and the striving, but the public failure. Repeated failure. Where everyone could see them mess up and sprawl all over the pavement or the lawn and look like a dork.

I hadn’t thought about that kid in years, but a recent post brought it crashing back.

Earlier this week, a friend posted about this on Facebook.

Basically Hugo talked about the tragic suicide of a teen, Amanda Todd, following severe harassment after Todd’s decision to ‘sext’ a man who, it turns out, may have been a predator. Allegedly this man tried to blackmail her and released the pictures to her classmates and life took a horrible turn for Ms. Todd. More horribly, she didn’t see a way out.

Unfortunately, Todd’s story has been hijacked and trotted out as a warning to girls about the danger of stepping ‘out of line’ with anything sexual, another ridiculous blame to victim measure. While the article initially focused on sexuality, what is most concerning to me is the way the ‘messing up your life’ message demands perfection from young—and not so young—women, while at the same time forbidding them to experiment or risk failure. As I told Nicole in our Facebook exchange, this is the broader message for me:

[Resilience and the ability to thrive] means focusing on giving them what we've given their brothers for decades: the chance to see failure –- and even humiliation -– as an opportunity rather than as a life-destroying disaster.

Beyond the business world and the implications there—a whole different post about taking risks and business. There is a terrific Forbes article about female entrepreneurs, who are a too small percentage of that market but a highly successful one, if anyone is interested—I kept thinking about the implications of this message, this demand for instant perfection, on creativity. Whatever the media—visual through paint, photography, glass, fiber; performance in dance or theater; or the written word—taking a chance, risking failure if you will, is inherent in creative works. As much as we try to say, “writing is a business” or “once we finish it’s a product,” the end result of our creative endeavor is still a piece of our soul.

And we offer it up to the world to critique.

If we aren’t “allowed” to take risks, to risk failure, if we have to be “perfect” before we attempt…anything, what does that say about us as a society? If we all have to fall in line and not push creative boundaries, there won’t be urban fantasies or paranormal entities or mysteries that make us think, not just about who did the crime, but what led those characters to make those decisions or any of the other layers we authors craft into our stories to make us think outside the expected. Outside the safe.

And failure to take the creative risk is a loss for all of us.

I don’t want to live in a white bread world, where everything is the same. Where people are afraid to take risks. Are afraid to challenge their deepest fears and embrace their highest dreams.
Instead I applaud everyone who steps outside their comfort zone and offers a piece of their vision. A piece of their heart.

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Saturday, 29 June 2013

Holistic Health Information A Holistic Approach to Thyroid Health

I recently attended a lecture that opened my eyes to the fact that thyroid dysfunction is the #3 health challenge in the country, only after heart disease and cancer. It is now known that 90% of women that are plagued with hypothyroid have autoimmune disease, and particularly Hashimoto’s disease. This is a condition in which your body attacks your own thyroid. The symptoms of Hashimoto’s disease include: foggy brain, fatigue, weight gain, depression, and chronic inflammation.

One of the main ways to treat and control this condition is the elimination of gluten from the diet, since 100% of women suffering from Hashimoto’s are also gluten-intolerant. Also, the ingestion of high doses of Vitamin D3 and omega 3’s are helpful. These two nutrients aid in assisting your immune system in self-regulating. Vitamin D3 and omega 3’s also allow your immune system to stay more balanced, and neither attack your body, or become weak when it needs to fight infections.

Surprisingly, prescribing and consuming thyroid medications is often ineffective, and sometimes detrimental to this condition. The effect of autoimmune thyroid disease also degenerates and reduces the brain’s ability to produce neurotransmitters, such as dopamine and serotonin. This must also be addressed through the consumption of the precursor nutrients that help the brain make the neurotransmitters.

I now carry specialized neurotransmitter precursor nutrients called Serotone and Dopatone to restore the production of neurotransmitters. I am also able to offer a combination formula that provides the necessary amount of Vitamin D3 and Omega 3’s called Bio D mulsion.

Of course, the rest of the endocrine system must be supported, in order to aid in restoring proper function to the thyroid. Both blood sugar regulation and adrenal health are vital for this situation to become balanced. When properly functioning, this restores energy, brain functioning, normal weight, mood, and eliminates inflammation from the body.

Contact me to learn more about holistic approaches to thyroid health.

More holistic health information.

Image Source: thenpmom

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Posts Tagged ‘cars’

Here are 10 gasoline cars that get 40 mpg or better on the road

2011 Smart For Two – This lightweight car weighs only £ 1800 and features a 3-cylinder engine, helping to achieve a rating of 41 mpg highway. 2011 Chevy Cruze Eco – General Motors shaving weight 125 pounds this year’s model and using the system of “eco” Cruze has a rating of 42 mpg highway with […]

Magic-Mopar Dodge and Plymouth Muscle Cars

You were a passionate return in the 60s or later admirer, these cars are guaranteed to impress. Mopar is actually the auto parts division of Chrysler. The name refers to (MO) Tor (PAR) SR and has existed since the 1920s and is still in use today. However, auto enthusiasts usually think of Dodge and Plymouth […]

Toyota Hybrid Cars – Exclusive

Toyota Hybrid cars are the best hybrid best-selling US But Toyota is the right vehicle for you? During the first six months of 2006, more than 48,000 Toyota Prius and Highlander Hybrid models 18,000 were sold, representing almost 50% share of all US hybrid car market. Hybrids seem to be here to stay, at least […]

Complete presentation of Buick Cars

Buick Company In 1903, David Buick created a manufacture of automobiles. Buick was one of the first automobile manufacturing company that has been established. Headquartered in the United States of America Michigan. Buick logo represents the outstanding service, products and trade policies of the company and was registered under the Copyright Act in the United […]

Buick Muscle Cars

Most people never would imagine Buick as a major market player Muscle Car. However, times of Buick muscle cars in the 1970s and 1980s have been among the fastest around and are now among the most sought. In the 1960 Buick decided to create their own performance car after the success of the Pontiac GTO. […]

Build an electric car – Introduction to electric cars

Everyone is aware that the prices of petroleum products in the world have steadily increased in recent years. This is mainly due to the fact that the sources of these products are slowly depleted and experts believe that bled dry in the next 20 years. Because of this, every car owner was asked about what […]

Exotic Classic Sports Cars – The only Lamborghini Diablo

Lamborghini Diablo . The name is pure magic . Few cars are sexier than a Lamborghini. Even Batman leads to , the Murcielago LP640 Coupe in The Dark Knight. The engine noise was unmistakable , as they passed through the streets of Gotham City. Of course it was a convertible and, of course , Bruce […]

How well maintained cars sell faster and put more money in your pocket?

Many people do not realize that the car repairs for your car can increase its value. I know that when I look for a car or a truck, I’m looking for one that is in good condition. Yes, there are people who are looking for cars that need repair, but these people are few and […]

Preparation for the storage of classic cars

To keep a classic car looking great and to hold its own market value true enthusiast really take good care of him. Not only is it important to maintain the body work, take care of the exterior and interior, but also have to keep an eye on the engine. If installed on a routine and […]

Famous cars of the 50s

After the Great Depression and World War II, the United States grew in prosperity and a strong demand for cars exploded in the 1950s. Fins, chrome windshield and envelopes were the norm, the cars of 50 years has easily become one of the most beautiful and desirable cars ever made. Let’s look at some of […]

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Northern Harrier(Circus cyaneus)
Slender-bodied hawk with long tail and wings,long yellow legs, a conspicuous white rump and a facial disk that makes it look like an owl. Adult males are grey and females are brown. In flight, the wings are held in a shallow V similar to Turkey Vultures. Formerly called a Marsh Hawk, the Northern Harrier hunts on the wing in marshlands, fields and prairies.
Photo taken 7/21/01.
Northern Harriers nest on the ground. These two young hawks were almost run over by a tractor in a field that was being disked.
Photo taken 7/21/01.
Look at the difference one week makes. The white specks on their heads that looks like snow is what is left of the fluffy down.
Photo taken 7/28/01.
This picture shows the facial disk that makes the Northern Harrier look like an owl.
Photo taken 8/4/01.
Photo taken 8/4/01 a few days before the Northern Harriers were released.


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Darwin Cup - Horse racing - Accommodatuon

Like the Melbourne cup, the Darwin Cup sees all activity in the Northern Territory come to a standstill to see the action. Local pubs and clubs are always full of patrons and the race course is packed.

Darwin Cup RacesDarwin Cup CheeringDarwin Cup Finish Line

Every single piece of Darwin accommodation will be booked out so you need to book many months in advance if you want to come here at this time. Darwin is a tropical town and the cup will be accompanied by copious beer drinking by the locals and rowdy parties will carry on well in too the small hours, so come prepared if you are going to visit Darwin during the cup celebrations.

Darwin Cup TrackDarwin Cup CrowdDarwin Cup Racing


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Lorenz Distractors: Rainbow Variant - Animation & 4K UHD+ wallpaper

spiral, rainbow, wallpaper, animated gif, motion graphics, Lorenz Distractors, blender, cycles, distraction, wires, curves, animation nodes, lorenz distractors rainbow variant

Posted in Motion || Posted on 2016-06-06 20:20:42

Higher resolution versions: Imgur | Dribbble | G+ | Ello

The Wallpaper can be found at G+ Photos.

I’ve seen a lot of references to the concept of the Lorenz Attractor recently, but one execution of the idea really stood out from all the others - the image used in the Animation Nodes v1.6 release announcement, originally created by Robert Trirop. Doubly inspired because Animation Nodes is one of my favorite tools of all time, I -had- to learn not only the techniques used to create such a beautiful flow of curves, but also the math behind the system. So I dove in - but I got distracted while working on it, and this is what I created instead of a faithful reproduction of the system.

When I got started, I became aware of the existence of the related concepts of “Strange Attractor”, “Phase Space”, and“Phase Portrait”. I started with reading WikiPedia articles on the topics, and when the math got too dense with Greek symbols for my ability to understand, I turned to YouTube. Then when the video lectures became too dry for my ability to focus, I decided to just start building an Animation Nodes setup based on what I already knew about the equation - and before I got to anything remotely resembling a reliable reproduction of the idea, the output in my scene was already beautiful. So I kept moving down the path of beautiful distraction, and this is where it ended up - another design I’m happy to have completed. My rate of ideas that make it through to completion has been 1/6th lately, so every design that gets this far feels like a major victory in my struggle to produce new work. I will have to revisit many of the original concepts again later, but those will have to be another day. It is exciting for me that I’ve made it far enough in my understanding of maths to start building anything this complex.

I’ve also just learned how to use the Animation Nodes “Reassign” loop output - which allows me to take the previously output value from a generator loop and use it as the starting value for an input of the same data type in the next execution of that loop, so things are about to get REALLY interesting in my production workflow. >:)

Hours after all of the original reference articles and videos that I read and watched,, hours after creating and becoming satisfied with my disign - when my final render was already in progress, I found Daniel Shiffman’s “Lorenz Attractor in Processing” video, and thought to myself: “This guy is awesome. He gets straight to the point of what I wanted to learn. I wish I had come across this video first.”

I also came across a video of some super pretty 1984 vector display renditions of the Lorenz Attractor equation with multiple input parameter configurations, which I’m pretty sure were the inspiration for the UI designs of the holograms in the first Iron Man movie.

Bonus, because I couldn’t -not- think this phrase while doing all the reading earlier: “Your MOM was a complex quadratic polynomial LAST NIGHT! OHHHHHH~!!”

spiral, rainbow, wallpaper, animated gif, motion graphics, lorenz distractors, blender, cycles, distraction, wires, curves, animation nodes, lorenz distractors rainbow variant

Space Bugs have invaded this page! Will you defend this Sector?


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Online shopping for Bicycle Chainrings, compare prices and find the best deal for Bicycle Chainrings

Number7 it's the best place to find discounts. Our Search Results on how to get the best online shopping deals on Bicycle Chainrings. USA, LLC
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Sunday, January 11, 2015

just a kinda girl, kinda livin'

just a kinda girl, kinda livin' out here

yesterday, i was cycling to my local library and i thought i cycled past someone i used to know
(*´_ゝ｀)              (*´ｪ｀*)
 taking cliche pictures of my cliche neighborhood
i keep riding my bike to the library and reading books and watching movies. and i keep tellin m'self that i'm gunna write about every single thing that i read and watch.
so far, nothing
so i made this playlist about feelings sung by girls that have feelings.
it's been a looooooong time since i posted a lame playlist on 8tracks....

  1. One Last Time - Ariana Grande
  2. Gotta Tell You - Samantha Mumba
  3. All You Had To Do Was Stay - Taylor Swift
  4. Some Things Never Seem to Fucking Work - Solange
  5. Everybody Wants to Rule The World - Lorde
  6. Touch of My Hand - Britney Spears
  7. Happy - Hilary Duff
  8. Insincerely Yours - Lily Allen
  9. Perfect Stranger - Katy B Feat. Magnetic Man

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North Wales Land Rover Club
Tel: 07768 958906

Hobson Industries Ltd

Hobson Industries Limited is a Land Rover remanufacturing company that
specialise in full vehicle rebuilds, power train remanufacture and rebuild,
and is an OEM parts supplier for all Land Rover variants.  Official
distributor of JLR merchandise with up to 50% off RRP, Hobson Industries
also has a full fabrication workshop for unique adaptations and conversions
and two commercial paint booths offering touch-ups to full vehicle resprays.

Tel: 01507 343 401


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Sony Xperia Z3 Tablet Compact SGP611 - tablet - Android 4.4 (KitKat) - 16 GB - 8" Waterproof with a rating of IP65/684G/LTE feature is available only on SGP6218" TRILUMINOS Display with Live Colour LED and X-Reality for mobilePS4 Remote Play on...

See Special Price

Kocaso W700 7 Inch Tablet PC Introducing the KOCASO W700 Windows Tablet. Featuring an Intel Quad Core Processor, 1GB RAM, and 16GB built-in memory. With a 7" High resolution IPS screen, with 1024 x 600 pixel clarity, you'll enjoy every second of...

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Fire, 7" Display, Wi-Fi, 8 GB - Includes Special Offers Beautiful 7" IPS display (171 ppi / 1024 x 600). Available in four colours.Fast 1.3 GHz quad-core processor and rear- and front-facing cameras.Amazon Underground: All-new, one-of-a-kind app...

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*Sale ends 10th September* G-Hold is an innovative way, initially funded through Kickstarter, to hold your tablets or other devices. Perfect for reading e-Books for iPad. The patent-pending G-Hold range offers unprecedented control over your iPad,...

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Do you want to have a private cinema ? Have you paid for movie yet? Ubbida will give you a dream journey! Ubbida 3D Virtual Reality Headset is an entry-level VR headset for both techno-geeks and the casual customer looking to explore the hottest...

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The 7.85" Polaroid tablet is powered by a 1.6GHz Quad core processor with 1GB RAM. It has front and rear facing cameras, 5 to 6 hours of battery life and a 16GB internal memory which can be boosted by Micro SD. The stunning 7.85" HD screen is...

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Every Teaching Artist Insured!

Date: Friday November 17th
Time: 2:30pm-4:00pm
Location: Webinar

Every Teaching Artist Insured is a free live stream presentation for teaching artists, freelance artists, and arts administrators who do not have insurance through an employer or union. This one hour presentation will provide clear information on how to sign up for a health insurance plan through the New York State of Health Marketplace (Obamacare), and information on local, low cost healthcare options for New York City residents.

Facilitated by Renata Marinaro, National Director of Health Services for The Actor’s Fund, this livestream presentation will equip you with the tools you need to get medical services as a freelancer. Topics will include:

  • How do I enroll for ACA (Obamacare) insurance?
  • How do I report sporadic or self-employed income?
  • What are my options in 2018?
  • Straight-talk about changes in ACA, executive orders, and how they may affect you.
  • Am I eligible for Medicaid or subsidized insurance?
  • Am I eligible for a $20 plan?
  • Where do I get care if I’m uninsured?

Register [HERE]

After registering, you will receive a confirmation email containing information about joining the webinar.

Comments are closed.
NYC AiE Roundtable


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O&P Library > Orthotics and Prosthetics > 1954, Vol 8, Num 1

Orthotics and ProstheticsThis journal was digitally reproduced with permission from the American Orthotic & Prosthetic Association (AOPA).

Funding for this project was provided by the American Academy of Orthotists and Prosthetists through a grant from the US Department of Education (grant number H235K080004). However, this does not necessarily represent the policy of the Department of Education, and you should not assume endorsement by the Federal Government. For more information about the Academy please visit our website at

You can help expand the
O&P Virtual Library with a
tax-deductible contribution.

1954, Vol 8, Num 1

View Complete Issue PDF

with original layout

Training the Unilateral Amputee Upper Extremity

Leonard P. Madison

An Improved Type of Back Check for Artificial Legs

Francis L. Smith, Fellow
John L. Young, Ph.d., Senior Fellow

The German Orthopedic Firm; Notes on Employee Training and Cost System

George W. Fillauer

Prosthesis For Korean Soldier Amputees

Captain James N. Calway, MSC

Arch Supports - Problems of Fittings and Materials with Special Reference to the Use of Nyloplex

Carlton Fillauer

Importance of Musculature of the Amputation Stump

Prof. Dr. Felix Mondry, Marburg/R.

O&P Library > Orthotics and Prosthetics > 1954, Vol 8, Num 1

The O&P Virtual Library is a project of the Digital Resource Foundation for the Orthotics & Prosthetics Community. Contact Us | Contribute


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Saturday, February 23, 2008

OBIEE Controling Pivot View behavior

One of the more powerful tools in OBIEE is the pivot view. If you have large amounts of data you sometime run out of rows and or columns or even worse out of cells

You can control these values by altering the instanceconfig.xml.
This file is usually found in ..\OracleBIData\web\config
Good info can be found in the Oracle® Business Intelligence Presentation
Services Administration Guide (b31766.pdf)

If you open instanceconfig.xml in notepad you get something like these parameters

The behavior of the pivot view can be altered with the following parameters:

  • [MaxVisibleColumns] Sets the maximum number of columns to be displayed in a Pivot View default{1000}

  • [MaxVisiblePages] Sets the maximum number of page choices (or pages in PDF) to be displayed in a Pivot View default{1000}

  • [MaxVisibleRows] Sets the maximum number of rows to be displayed in a Pivot View. Default{100000}

  • [MaxVisibleSections] Sets the maximum number of sections to be displayed in a Pivot View. Default{1000}

Altered in the instance config it would look like this:

If you still run out of cells try this:

  • [CubeMaxPopulatedCells] The maximum number of populated cells in the Pivot Table. If this maximum is exceeded, the user receives an error when rendering the pivot table. Default {150000 }

  • [CubeMaxRecords ] The maximum number of records returned by a query for the Pivot Table engine to process. This roughly governs the maximum number of cells that can be populated in a pivot table (unpopulated cells in a sparse pivot table do not count). If this maximum is exceeded, the user receives an error when rendering the pivot table.

Till next Time

Anonymous said...

thanks for the post, helped me ........

Mirela said...

I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

Anonymous said...

Thanks John

Could you show me where to put the 'pivotview' part in the original file content?
Like between which two lines I should insert the pivotview part?

John Minkjan said...

They should be between the serverinstance tags.

Anonymous said...

Thanks john..

I only see one serverinstance tag in the file which is the third line of the file content

So do you mean above serverinstance after webconfig, or below serverinstance and above DSN where I should insert pivotview part?

I am new in OBIEE, so I am a little confused..

John Minkjan said...

There should a closing tag also. It's between those tags. Have a look a this document:
to see where each tag should go

Anonymous said...

Thanks John.. This article was excellent. The document you provided is invaluable.

Hari said...

I have few questions about the CubeMaxRecords and CubeMaxPopulatedCells. If we need to change these parameters, does it impact the performance, Please let me know. For our business, we need to change these parameters drastically from 200000 to 1 million. Please let me know what impact do we have on the performance.

Thanks in advance,

John Minkjan said...

Of course it will influecene performance, if the BI-server has take 5 times a much cells into memory you migth run into physical memory problemns. Next to that rendering a milions cells in HTML will seriously influence perfromance of th presentation server. Consider using cubes on the DB or using aggregate tables.

Nawneet said...

I tried the same and pasted

in the file , then restarted the BI server and BI presentation server. But still the report in Dashboard for pivot table show all rows.

Have i need to do some other changes.

Zoek de Haas said...

What is actually the default value for [CubeMaxRecords] ? You mentioned all the others but skipped this one, and I am very curious about this one in specific.

Thx in advance :)

Ghost said...

Hi John,

I am facing the "Exceeded configured maximum number of allowed output prompts, sections, rows, or columns" in one of the environment (say ST) but not not in my development environment.
I checked the instanceconfig.xml in both the environments and there is no difference in the file. Both the environment are pointing to the same database.

do you think I am missing something here?? ..

nir said...

What is the equivalent process in OBIEE 11g (

Can you please specify the max allowed values in each parameter?

I tried configure the instanceconfig.xml, but keep getting this error.

Uma Nagarajan said...

Excllent Article John.

Anonymous said...

I using table instead the pivot table but this error up:
View Display Error

Exceeded configured maximum number of allowed output prompts, sections, rows, or columns.
Error Details
Error Codes: IRVLJWTA:OI2DL65P
Location: saw.views.dashboard, saw.subsystem.portal.pagesImpl, saw.subsystem.portal, saw.httpserver.processrequest, saw.rpc.server.responder, saw.rpc.server, saw.rpc.server.handleConnection, saw.rpc.server.dispatch, saw.threadpool.socketrpcserver, saw.threads
SQL Issued: 34167~t0dlri931mrkcgffselhi5qcrm

Please help

Thank you

Anonymous said...

Hi John -

In 11g, I am getting the error when putting the column in the pivot section. I tried reducing the report output to limit to the default. Now, with 28 distinct values in section and 239 total number of table rows, I still get the error when I put the values in the section.

Can you please let me know the solution if any !

Thanks !


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Search Memorials  (Last Name) :    Advanced
  > Joe Martinez

Add Photos, Videos, Music

Joe  Martinez

Memorial for Joe Martinez

Born in New York, New York on Jun. 24, 1936
Departed on Jul. 13, 2017 and resided in Albany, OR.

June 24, 1936---July 13, 2017
Joe Martinez was born June 24, 1936 in Brooklyn, New York to Teodora Rodriguez and Jose Martinez, who immigrated from Cordoba, Spain. When Joe was young, his family moved to Oklahoma for job opportunities, eventually settling in California. Joe grew up in Sunnyvale, California where he played baseball and football for Fremont High School and met his wife of sixty years, Bernice Gouveia. Joe and Bernice raised six children together, Christie (spouse Howie), Cindy (spouse Jeff), Cari, (spouse Mike), Rob, (spouse Patricia), Tracy (spouse Mike), Jenny (spouse Grant), 13 grandchildren and 5 great grandchildren. Joe and Bernice moved to Oregon 46 years ago to live on a farm, creating fabulous memories with their family and friends.
Joe Martinez was a man who lived a life full of love, generosity, and perseverance; always seeing the positive in every situation. He loved his family, and was fully devoted to them. He valued hard work, never hesitating to take on new and multiple ventures to support his family. He valued fun, enjoying cards or golf with anyone who was up for the challenge. He extended that love and commitment to his sisters, Dolores and Jeanette, brother Billy, and many in-laws.
Joe valued generosity, continually offering help, gifts, food and hospitality to all who were fortunate enough to have crossed his path. He lived an extraordinary life of integrity, love, gratitude, strength with purpose and meaning.
Thank you, Joe, for being here with us for the time you had to spend. Your gifts will be in our hearts and minds. May we honor you by living a life fully in line with our values and in love with life, as you showed us so well. Rest in peace and may you be on a golf course somewhere walking 18 holes and playing the best round you've ever played.
There will be a Celebration of Life at Joe and Bernice's home on Sunday, July 23rd at 11:00 AM. In lieu of flowers, please send remembrances to the Parkinsons Disease Foundation and/or Samaritan Evergreen Hospice in Albany in care of Fisher Funeral Home, 306 SW Washington St., Albany, OR 97321

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Obituary Preview for Rachel E. Headrick

Rachel E. Headrick Obituary

Published in The Huntsville Times on Jan. 1, 1900
17 of 17 words: Died March 24, 2013 Rachel E. Headrick Services at 2pm March 26 from Rainsville Funeral Home Chapel.

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Thursday, June 30, 2011

please destroy me this way

this piece was inspired by the painting you see
above done by Alfie Ebojo aka Alfienumeric...those
of you who visit this blog regularly know that i
recognize her as a dope artist out of the City of
Angels. check more of her work out here:

destroy me this way
let those dreams i left scattered to the winds
come back as two-toned sparrows
with voices like Spanish bells
let every fear i had
shrivel like the pits of peaches
half-eaten on the sides of roads

let me lose myself
in woven sunlight that promises
to knit futures before my eyes
and tell everyone that means something to me
thank you for your prayers
i am stitching them to my sides now

let me soar
into a horizon beyond fingertips and despair
where i used to be so long ago
and let these years in front of me
not listen to those
i've left behind.

haiku 6.30.11

trying to score points
for verbal jabs is on par
with stabbing for fun

Wednesday, June 29, 2011

waiting for the dusk

*for brownin'*

if nightfall
was composed only of
your tresses embracing the sides of my face
Thierry Mugler and the dew of bashful lips
alongside the hum of an electric guitar
and the magic
of minutes stretching like shadows
then the daytime
couldn't move fast enough
for me.

Sunday, June 26, 2011

the longest hour...

h'lo folks! i figured i'd depart from the regular flow
and share a story from my recent travel. i was on my
way to Charlotte, North Carolina for a family event and
some R&R. i had strapped myself in on the plane and was
about to tip my head back to catch a wink or two when i
heard someone say, 'Excuse me.' i looked up and saw a
woman grin at me, a bit on the shy side i thought. boy,
was i wrong.

i got up to let her sit in the window seat and this lady
(i didn't even catch her name, despite the fact she had
not stopped talking until 15 minutes into the flight)
began to tell me her story over the past 24 hours. she
had missed a flight the night before, missed another one
earlier and had to make her way to JFK from LaGuardia to
catch this flight. it was going to be her first time going
to South Carolina. 'so you're driving after you get to
Charlotte?' i asked. 'oh yes,' she said. she was a sister,
from the islands. i gathered as much from the accent and
the cherry kool-aid tint of her hair color. she lost me
when she took her shoes off however. i realize that we,
as human beings, tend to have our own odor under certain
circumstances. but when she took her shoes off, i swear
to you, i caught a whiff of cold cuts. salami. i grimaced
inwardly. mind you, she's still talking, but now to herself.

i turned to my sisters sitting across the aisle, settled
in. we take off smoothly, and i notice a little girl sitting
in front of them, playing. she seemed a little under the
weather. i wouldn't know how much until later. she gave me
a small grin and i returned the favor. meanwhile, my seat
mate had begun to wind down after getting a blanket. 'i'm
from the islands, and we don't do the cold. cold kills me!'
she said with a chuckle. 'oh, my family is as well,' i reply
but she pretty much ran roughshod over that and didn't hear.
works for me. i closed my eyes for a bit.

we wind up getting to Charlotte 20 minutes early. as we start
our descent, i pop a piece of gum in my mouth and begin to get
ready for landing. the little girl i saw earlier said something
in Spanish to her mother, who was sitting in front of me. her
face looked a bit pale. she looks off, past me to the back. and
then, it happens. as the plane begins to land, she vomits. all
of the orange juice and whatever else she has flows out. it was
like a cutscene from a Wes Craven film. it spills out onto her
clothes, hits the floor. after a minute of this, another little
girl sitting next to her, possibly her sister says, 'now I might
throw up. gross.' her mother? she was fumbling for tissue, and
looked a bit distracted even when others gave her tissue and
napkins. while this is going on, we're set to taxi into the gate.
but then the pilot gets on the speaker to tell us another plane
is there. and we have to wait a half hour. and then the AC gets
cut off.

the sister next to me starts getting agitated. 'c'mon man, we
gotta get off the plane. this is ridiculous.', she says in
between making phone calls to different people informing them
as to what's going on. the little girl goes to the bathroom
with her mother and comes back freshly scrubbed and changed
and happier it seems. the AC had been cut back on, and things
got more mellow. well, save for this older brother pulling his
Samsonite suitcase out from the overhead and tucking it between
his legs waiting to deplane. the flight attendant had to give
him a quick talking to for that one. she also had to buckle the
little girl in because her mother was too busy playing Bejeweled
on her BlackBerry. yeah, you read that right. as we get baggage
claim info, my seatmate goes, 'oh it's Carousel D as in David.
that's my boyfriend's name!' i nodded and said, 'okay, cool..'
as if that would stop the flow of speech(what was i thinking?)
but she then says, 'we met online. this is the first time i'm
meeting him.' cue the dramatic music. because once i heard that,
i thought, 'this is a 48 Hours episode possibly.' and she's going
to South Carolina to meet him. i was officially done at that
point. and the moment we were ready to deplane, i bolted. what
a crazy start to a good trip.

Friday, June 24, 2011

laughter and her sunrise

*for brownin'*

you may be at your best
when you are laughing
and joy paints a pinkish dance
across the porcelain of your cheeks
as if you held in
a summer sunrise
just for these moments
and each peal
becomes sweet dew
within my own ears

Friday, June 17, 2011

garlands of grace

*for brownin'*

for so many reasons
that your feet have become
garlands of grace
there have been reasons
where you've felt them gripped in pain
like thorns embedded just below the skin
i appreciate that much more
your footsteps
and hope that one day
my own hands
can rival water
and course around your toes enough
for your skin to flush with joy

Thursday, June 16, 2011

haiku 6.16.11

even below the
surface i now see what was
needed to be seen.

subway surfing.

we should've known the moment he stood up.

the J train had just pulled out of the 121st Street
station on its way towards Brooklyn and eventually,
Manhattan. i was on the train, headed to work the
evening shift on a temp gig with NYU. the train car
i was in had the usual mix of teens fresh out of
school, young mothers and their oversized strollers,
Chinese women hawking bootleg DVDs and an assorted
thug or two with a du-rag on. one guy stood out
though. he sat near the connecting door of the car
off to my left. he sipped from a can in a brown paper
bag that matched his complexion. he was clean, his
cut was a low 'Fro two days past freshness. all he
had on was a navy blue sweatsuit. i figured he was
out for a gym run. i figured wrong because he went
through the door. and had proceeded to climb ON TOP
of the car.

now, you hear about people train-surfing out in
places like Brazil, or India when there's literally
no real seating on their interior railways. but here,
in New York City? most think that went out with the
late 1980's and S-Curls. but this dude was literally
train-surfing!!! we could hear him as he held on,
the loud bumps making everyone pay attention. he had
onions, this guy. especially given the fact that the
boys in blue walk up and down subway lines. some of
the people were waiting to see if he'd slip and fall
off, a gruesome development since we were fast
approaching the Cypress Hills station on the border
between Queens and Brooklyn and nothing was gonna
save him from dropping almost three stories to the
pavement below. right across the street from a
cemetery at that.

all the excitement however came to an end when the
surfer hopped off onto the platofrm at Cypress Hills,
and bolted towards the stairs. the NYPD officers ran
after him in a mad dash. just another random piece
of subway madness in the Big Apple.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

hollow points

arguments don't seem to matter
once bone shatters
and flesh becomes
insignificant as pulp at the bottom
of juice cartons
whatever the point that was trying to be made
will it be remembered
once the blood dries?

a pond's surface

*for brownin'*

it would not be
out of the ordinary
to meditate on what your stare means
when you are pleased
past all troubles
that tower and tangle like so many trees
and to see your face
still as a back country pond
your eyes
bold maple leaves
drifting on the surface
the only ripples
being when you exhibit that beam of light
that makes silence sweeter.

musical interlude 6.15.11

i figured i'd switch it up a bit and bring you a
track that has made its way into my summer playlists,
Stalley's 'She Hates The Bass'...

haiku 6.14.11

when night falls over
me, the lasting sunlight is
nothing but your voice

Monday, June 13, 2011

200th post!!!

i can't believe it! but there won't be any major
celebration...i'll save that for a bigger number.
i appreciate every one of you who has checked this
blog out and told others to do the same!! and of
course you know there's more to come...

haiku 6.13.11

you should have heard the
word of Isis; a goddess
cant teach out of pride.

science fiction for the corners

i wanted to write of
worlds that defy logic
caused shock and awe
in a world that only sees fit
to drop its jaw at stupidity in loud print
and there are days
when some of these streets
are planets unbound
places where Ming the Merciless
might've owned carryouts
mining for minerals and
taking every Flash Gordon
who's bright enough for books
for their papers and powers

who needs rocketships to go to the moon
when space dust is sold by the baggie
and moon rocks come with color tops
to make alleys seas of tranquility
man oh man
i can be an astronaut for less
than a quarter pound in the hand
with motherships bearing golden rims
trim that wears prada and snakeskin
talking in groaning bass
like some hep cat put down in ink
before my first chance to blink,
'when have you found a brother
who had time to waste on the moon?'

and then it hit me
science fiction for the corners
would make millions
just imagine
a 'hood with no projects
bodegas better than organic farms
asthma a thing for the past
brothers would be building hovercars
instead of building on how to blast a fool
we'd use trash and broken glass
to power streetlights and guitar amps
then i stopped
because i didn't want
this dream of a better world
to only be fiction
and besides,
Hollywood would only cast
Keanu Reeves in the lead again.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

ripe peach haiku

some say a peach is
best to eat before it's ripe;
i will wait for yours.

three AM thunder

*for brownin'*

before i drifted off to sleep
the sugar your name carries
remained on my lips
after this recent explosion
sticky sweat
turning to dew
because thoughts of you
became thieves of lightning
and now the rain
as it falls past cracked windows
do you hear
the thunder roll
where you are?

haiku 6.11.11

fog rests upon these
roads like a tired runner; it
only breathes raindrops.

Thursday, June 9, 2011

tropic of cocoa

*for brownin'*

nights have passed
where i find my mind
swimming in the sweetness of your skin
and finding rest
on each of these cocoa inflected isles
that congregate at the rise
of your smile
they strengthen my eyes
for those moments when i look at you
to plot exactly where
dreams realized could take me.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

treading water furiously(from the archives)

the worst thing
about this
isn't clawing for air
struggling to breathe
its that those
grasping your legs with
concrete hands
never considered what that feels like
let alone doing it

Sunday, June 5, 2011

the poet's surgery to combat misery

tonight my words
need to sever flesh
break bonds and clear capillaries
i need
to excise this sorrowful mass
of molasses from inside of me
before it solidifies
like grease in a turkey pan
and it's all got to be done on the run
'cause tomorrow leaves me no time
to let anguish stand.

haiku 3.2.08(from the archives)

let me loosen your
doubts; easier doing that
than your own bra strap.

Saturday, June 4, 2011

crabs in a barrel observation #4

she'll use red number five
for hair dye
pay for painful inscriptions
of paw prints on her thigh
'cause she doesn't want a Tyrone
to forget where to walk
and in her talk
please note the consistency of chewing gum
rainbow colored contacts
that make Toni Morrison sigh
but what do the ghetto gorgeous do
when the soap operas
and their fleeting dreams

crystal smile

*for brownin'*

the wealth of your smile
is like
feeling the cool crystalline drops
of water within the throat
as the sun burns your scalp
forgive me my thirst
to see you smile so often
and to give them to me.

haiku 11.28.08 (from the archives)

hand spun ivory
that shines like midday sun; she
does her skin justice.

haiku 6.4.11

that lost in the sauce,
he found that car bombs are no
good when driving drunk.

Friday, June 3, 2011

st.marks place, 9:22 pm

i prefer this moment
right when the air hangs lower
with old tobacco and the growing night
it's here
that punks and b-boys
trade war stories, lighters and laughs
uptown girls
strut like giraffes
with downtown boys on their arms
cursing the bridge and tunnel crowd
being only one morning after away from that fate
step around the sashimi
that left someone's stomach
after too much Sapporo
the yellow cabs
don't make the night glow any different
and somewhere along here
voices used to wail
voices used to rock
and now it's all becoming
frozen yogurt, white noise and pop
but right now
i am here enjoying that moment
of way back when
before evening stops

haiku 7.5.11

i fall asleep lips
open because in dreams i
know she does the same

rest in power, solemn soldier.

Ji Jaga Geronimo Pratt has gone home.

i thank this brother not only for his struggle as a
Black Panther, but for one lesson he taught me one
crisp spring morning out on the White House lawn about
13 years ago. i was there as part of an activist rally
fighting for the rights of political prisoners. many
on the front lines of the struggle were there. i had
spotted Angela Davis hurrying to speak, a nightingale
in the midst of all the protesters from other colleges
and communities. i was walking around, caught up in the
spirit but feeling a bit disconnected. i had been in
this frame of mind for some time, seeing that for every
person who devoted their time to the struggle there were
three people willing to be poverty pimps in a sense. only
there to make their post-collegiate resume look good.

i happened to have stumbled upon a small gathering by a
tree. and there before me was Geronimo Pratt. in all of his
simple but strong glory. i had a journal open with an
interview he had given taped to the page. i shook his
hand, and noted the firm grip. i had the journal in hand
and asked if he could sign the article. naive as hell, i
know. he gave me a kind but firm look(more than i deserved
at that moment really) and said, 'only movie stars sign
autographs.' i bowed my head slightly and apologized.
after a moment or two, i moved away from the group.

i thank Geronimo because what that moment taught me was,
as much as we like to romanticize the struggle, dress it
up in fatigues and rhetoric from afar, there are people
whose lives have changed utterly in the name of the struggle.
from that day on, i told myself, i will never even THINK
of cheapening what this brother and countless others have
done and still do. even if it looks like i'm not in full
solidarity because i don't talk the talk..if my heart is
in full solidarity then my actions will speak for me. and
since that day down in DC, i've tried my best to do that.

Geronimo never looked back. and he stayed true to his people
and himself, in stoic, forthright fashion. he even joined
another Panther, Pete O'Neal in Tanzania for the last ten
years with his Panther initiative there, until his passing
yesterday at the age of 63.

rest in power soldier. i'll never forget your lesson.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

haiku 6.1.11

photo by Keith Weaver

*for brownin'*

this summer and all
that follow, i prefer your
touch over the sun's.

the dance of flower petals

each blossom
that sways below my knees
under strands of summer's light
teach me steps to a dance
i hope to recreate
with you in my arms
because their petals
resemble the luster within
each freckle upon your cheek
and so i walk that much slower
learning these steps
that go along with the music
of your soul.

haiku 1.4.08

i brave the cold for
the chance to kiss you; but will
your fire be there?


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Home » » The Age of Adaline (2015)

The Age of Adaline (2015)

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Home » » A Most Violent Year (2014)

A Most Violent Year (2014)

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Online Streaming A Most Violent Year A thriller set in New York City during the winter of 1981, statistically one of the most violent years in the city's history, and centered on a the lives of an immigrant and his family trying to expand their business and capitalize on opportunities as the rampant violence, decay, and corruption of the day drag them in and threaten to destroy all they have built. Download A Most Violent Year Full Movie

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Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Contentiousness - its a thing these days

A few months ago, I went through a brief process I'd been contemplating for a long time. I became an ordained member of the Clergy.

The process was brief - about 10 minutes to fill out a form online, from a non-sectarian Monastery located in Washington state, which holds the belief that we're all children of the same planet regardless of our personal belief system (I'm pagan - Asatru to be precise) and should therefore all have the same access to becoming Recognized by the State as valid Spiritual leaders, Officiants for religious ceremony, etc.  Then I ordered a copy of my official registration of ordination from them (about $30 for copying and mailing fees) took it to the county offices where I live, and put it on file with the state authorities - for free.

I'm now considered a legal officiant for Weddings, Funerals, Christenings and Wiccanings, etc., recognized as such by the state where I live, with my ordination recorded in the county offices on a particular page in their book of registered wedding officiants.

So you might be asking yourself what my recent ordination has to do with being Contentious.

It all comes down to the debate on Same Gender Marriage.

I was asked by two friends of mine (pagan, but not same gendered) to officiate at their wedding.  Ok, so I'm looking at what it will take to be legally compliant to do so in my state, thinking about whether I want to take up the task and if it will be a "one off" or I'll stay current and hire myself out, when my state legislature starts tossing about a bill that would remove the government from having anything to do with weddings (no more licenses, just a certificate of acknowledgement filed after a ceremony by a member of the clergy) so that state officials - court clerks, judges, etc - aren't obligated to violate Their religious beliefs in order to officiate.

You know, that whole no same gender thing that some of the more conservative Christian, all of the Muslim, and a lot of Judaic practitioners consider absolutely against their religion?

It has become a bit of a sticky wicket really.  If the government forces them to conduct weddings that are strictly outside their personal religious beliefs - it is in effect interfering with their religious observations.  The counter argument, of course, being that Not forcing them to do so effectively forces their religious beliefs on a couple who want to get married.

So who, in the long run, is more protected?  The person who can go to a different priest, priestess, member of the clergy et al to have their ceremony?  Or the person who is having their religious convictions dismissed as invalid in the name of "fairness" to someone who has more than one option open to them?

We cannot live via the concept of "the Ends justifies the Means" folks.  We can't.  That way lies oppression and the end of anything even Remotely resembling true Freedom for Anyone.

What does that mean in this instance?  It means that no matter how much we might Want to force people to do what We consider "the right thing" - we effectively lose the war for the sake of winning a single battle.  It means that we can't force people to violate their honestly held religious convictions for the convenience of someone else, unless those religious convictions are causing Actual Harm.

Actual Harm - not a case of the butthurt, not a sense of wounded pride or indignation, not anger at some faux "aggression" on the part of the religious person - actual, honest ta goodness, visible Harm.  Harm like is caused when a religion dictates a woman must be stoned because she was raped (can we say "Islam" which still Practices this, in much of the world? I knew we could.)  Harm - like throwing a gay couple off the roof of a multi-story building - which happens in the Islamic countries of the Middle East on a routine and regular basis.  That is harm.  A business owner telling a gay couple, "I'm not comfortable with making a cake for your wedding - my religious belief is that the two of you getting married is an abomination" is NOT HARM - its butthurt and indgination and inconvenience at having to find a different bakery.

This is Reality, Calling Collect. Do you accept the charges?

I want to take a moment to reflect on the commonly held belief of today's society, which is that we should (somehow) be free from ever being Offended by what someone else says.

But we Thank You for playing, "You Bet Your Life!"

Frankly, if you want to make certain that you're never offended by anyone else's comments, I have a solution for you.  Suck It Up, Buttercup.  Go live in a cave, throw away all your electronics, delete all your social media profiles, and become a fucking HERMIT.  Because becoming a hermit is what it's going to take to avoid ever being offended by someone else's opinion.

I'm a tad fed up with the whole political correctness crap.  I've been fed up with it for a while.

The most recent helping of BS via the college campuses is that these whiny, spoiled rich brats - and don't make any mistake, that's what all of them are, regardless of color, religion, sexual preference, or political stance.... spoiled brat rich kids who've never had an actual hard day in their freaking Lives - is that they want "Safe Spaces" where no one else is allowed to exercise their 1st amendment right of Freedom of Speech.

They talk a lot about "microaggressions" being committed against them.  In reality, the only aggression is that someone disagreed with them, didn't coddle them, or didn't pat them on the head and tell them how Special they are.  And of course, there's the aggression of them becoming violent protesters because the person who disagreed wasn't suddenly forced to apologize and then get their mouth duck taped shut.

Get real and get a life, you self absorbed lot of useless wankers.  If you want to see what Aggression is like, try taking a trip to any of Dozens of countries where you Have No Rights, and can be jailed or killed for being the wrong gender, sexual preference, religion, or made the mistake of speaking out against the current regime.

Go - please - travel the world.  Learn what REAL oppression is like.  Then come back here, and see whether you still feel Oppressed and like people are being Aggressive against you.