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Who Cares?

Before Covid-19, American women were already in crisis

This was the year everyone discovered that caring is actually hard work.

The New York Times told us “America’s Mothers are In Crisis” in a package titled “Primal Scream.” The Washington Post wants us to know that “Working moms are not okay.” NPR ran a special package explaining “Enough Already: How The Pandemic Is Breaking Women.” In the Times, Ezra Klein noted that “forcing parents into low-wage, often exploitative, jobs by threatening them and their children with poverty may be counted as a success by some policymakers, but it’s a sign of a society that doesn’t value the most essential forms of labor.” Indeed.

Except, of course, most of this isn’t new. True, according to the Times, 4,637,000 payroll jobs have been lost by women in the United States since the Covid crisis began; 32 percent of those women between the ages of twenty-five and forty-four said childcare was the reason for their unemployment. But embedded in these handwringing headlines and profiles and photo spreads is the recognition, far too late, that childcare is already work. Long before the pandemic escalated things, there was a slow-motion crisis happening in millions of people’s lives, manufactured by a society that doesn’t value care, that has splintered us away from one another and demanded we handle every problem by ourselves, or, if we’re lucky, in partnership with one other person. If we can’t pull ourselves up by our proverbial bootstraps, we’re shit outta luck, or in the more eloquent terms of geographer Ruth Wilson Gilmore, we become casualties of “organized abandonment.”

Margaret Thatcher famously said “Who is society? There is no such thing! There are individual men and women and there are families.” Since the pandemic forced us all into some degree of lockdown and kept us there, more or less, for a year, I’ve been thinking of this as life in a Margaret Thatcher Unit. Our social lives have been amputated if they’re not neatly contained within a household, exacerbating every little stress that we must now face on our own. As researcher Noreena Hertz told Doug Henwood, humans aren’t meant to live like this; this much alone-ness heightens our fight-or-flight response, stretches us taut as a bowstring, ready to fire. The alternative, as all those articles about parenting remind us, is that many of us are trapped in our family units, unable to escape, building up an explosive tension that calls to mind the double meaning of “nuclear.”

Since the pandemic forced us all into some degree of lockdown and kept us there, more or less, for a year, I’ve been thinking of this as life in a Margaret Thatcher Unit.

Of course, elsewhere, Thatcher had essentially admitted that her political project was anything but the natural order of things; “Economics are the method, the object is to change the soul.” Long before Thatcher’s rise to power, others had engaged in such capitalist social engineering. The workweek we have somehow accepted as natural is a product of a time when the people in charge expected a worker to be a man who had a wife working constantly in the home. This situation itself—the “nuclear family”—was constructed much more intentionally than many might realize. Henry Ford had an entire department of inspectors whose job it was to ensure that his employees’ wives were engaged in “full-time domesticity,” as sociologist Andrew J. Cherlin put it, in order for those employees to qualify for his famous $5 a day family wage.

And prior to Ford and his ilk, as Silvia Federici argued in Caliban and the Witch, women were forced into full responsibility for domestic labor through massive state-sanctioned violence. Women, she noted, had, before the advent of capitalism, had some freedom, some access to common spaces and resources. With capitalism, “women themselves became the commons, as their work was defined as a natural resource, laying outside the sphere of market relations.” In this period of history, the gender binary itself, like so many other binaries (mind/body, human/nature, and, most importantly, home/work), was carved into society and our bodies through the infamous witch hunts in which women who stepped outside of acceptable lines were tortured and killed. The tautology established then is still so widely accepted that we can trace it in those job loss statistics: women care because we are women; we are women because we care.

The pandemic also introduced us to a new term: “essential work.” The first lockdown efforts aimed to close all non-essential businesses, though too often it was left up to the boss whether their employees were essential or not. Even plenty of “essential” work was forced online, but we suddenly became hyper-aware of the work that was still required in order to maintain our continued existence. Marxist feminists call this the work of “social reproduction.”

Thatcher be damned, we do live in a society, and being cut off from some of its few remaining benefits perversely underlines just how dependent we are on other people’s work. The Times discovered Silvia Federici this year, too; she told them, “The pre-existing condition is a system that makes life intolerable and unhealthy for millions of people.”

Canaries in the Coal Mine

We already lived with (and some of us had never stopped shouting about) a system that did not value care. What changed with the pandemic that so ruffled the feathers of the nation’s papers of record? What’s the missing piece in all these exhausted women’s lives? Their work and home responsibilities were already overwhelming; we already lacked functional (let alone affordable) childcare, paid sick time, family leave, or any other scraps of a safety net. The agenda-setters in the press and in politics, perhaps, formerly had access to privatized help: nannies, cleaners. But most of us already didn’t.

The missing piece, the one bit of social welfare that the United States deigns to provide, is public schools. And so, as so often happens when our Thatcher Units come up short, everyone has heaped blame on teachers. As if, in an occupation where 76 percent of the workforce are women, so many of those teachers are not stressed-out moms themselves.

At the beginning of the pandemic, I talked to Ellen Schweitzer, a social studies teacher at Stuyvesant High School in Manhattan. Schweitzer was part of the Movement of Rank-and-File Educators (MORE), a caucus within the United Federation of Teachers union that represents New York City’s public schoolteachers, and she’d been involved in organizing to force the schools to close for Covid while New York’s mayor and governor hemmed and hawed. New York schools are crowded—most of Schweitzer’s classes topped out at thirty-four students, and hallways were jam-packed. Safety precautions were nonexistent, she said; the schools promised that the bathrooms would be stocked with soap. “The sink that I usually use, only ice-cold water ever comes out of the faucet,” she said. “But, hey, at least there was soap and water!”

The get-back-in-the-classroom push came later, but its scolding tone, its “what-about-the-children!?!” finger-wagging, was deeply familiar to educators and to anyone who’s been paying attention for the last few decades. “If educators and their unions don’t embrace the established science, they risk continuing to widen gaps in educational attainment—and losing the support of their many long-time allies, like me,” one “epidemiologist and father” wrote in Vox. In The Nation, Sasha Abramsky wrote, “It is an abdication of responsibility for teachers’ unions and district administrations to reject CDC guidelines on returning to schools over the coming months, and not prepare to reopen classrooms at the end of this academic year—or even the next academic year.” With allies like these, who needs enemies?

Turquoise LeJeune Parker is an elementary school teacher in Durham, North Carolina and the vice president of the Durham Association of Educators, and she’s had to apply for health accommodations to keep teaching remotely as the schools there reopen for in-person learning. But Parker’s not exactly been lounging around eating bonbons for the past year; she’s been adapting her entire curriculum to virtual learning, figuring out how to engage small children over a screen, organizing virtual field trips and talking with her students about the multiple global crises they’re trapped in. And she’s had enough of the scolding, the blame, the dismissal of real health concerns that teachers have. “People, no matter the circumstance, believe that teachers are just some trash and we just don’t do our job.”

The same publications running hectoring op-eds demanding teachers get back in the classroom also document in extensive detail the spread of Covid variants, the brutality of the second (and third, and as of this writing, possibly fourth) wave, the widespread grief over loved ones lost to the virus, and the struggles of long-term sufferers as though these two issues are disconnected. On February 6, the Los Angeles Times ran an op-ed titled “Kids are suffering. Follow the science and reopen schools now.” Less than a month earlier, the same paper had written “Children apologize to their dying elders for spreading COVID-19 as LA County reels.” Children can’t spread Covid, except when they can, apparently. Follow the science! This is the same city where the teachers’ union, in 2019, struck in part to lower class sizes from, in some cases, up to forty-six kids in a room. Those lowered numbers, for the 2020–2021 school year, still allow up to forty-four students in higher grades, up to twenty-seven for third grade and below.

It’s been stunning to watch the discourse elide every single policy failure that led to a situation where some children have been learning remotely for a full year. Biden’s the president now, so everything’s all better! Or, perhaps, in the faux nonpartisan spirit of the day, “the science” is running the show! Though of course “the science” is anything but settled, as three epidemiologists recently noted in Jacobin. Seth J. Prins, Justin Feldman, and Abigail Cartus wrote that

the availability of resources that can make schools safer map onto existing patterns of racial segregation and disinvestment in public education that predominantly elite researchers pushing for in-person schooling seem happy to ignore, even as teachers in their own upper-middle-class suburban school districts sound the alarm on unsafe working conditions. With this latest attack on teachers’ unions, in-person proponents are not actually promoting “the science”—they’re engaging in racialized class conflict.

What’s more, polls continue to show that many parents in fact back their kids’ teachers, some even to the point of a potential strike. In February of this year, Pew found that 59 percent of adults “say K-12 schools that are not currently open for in-person instruction should wait to reopen until all teachers who want the coronavirus vaccine have received it.” In that same poll, 80 percent of Black adults said vaccination should come before in-person reopening. “As was the case last summer, Black, Hispanic and Asian adults are more likely than white adults to say that the risks to teachers and students of getting or spreading the coronavirus should be given a lot of consideration in deciding whether to reopen schools for in-person instruction,” the report noted. “And lower-income adults remain more likely than those with middle or upper incomes to say the same, as do Democrats compared with Republicans (including those who lean to each party).”

That’s probably because, in places like L.A. and Chicago and Philadelphia, Black and brown parents know quite well the already-inadequate conditions their kids face at school, and they know who’s been more likely to die of the virus. They know whose schools end up with window fans stuck on boards as a “ventilation system” and whose schools already met ventilation guidelines but quickly “upgraded ventilation and filtration systems, just in case.” They know, in other words, that the system was never designed to actually create good learning conditions for most kids. As this story went to press, reopened schools in Chicago and New York faced another wave of the virus, and a former Biden health adviser told reporters that he was questioning his own previous advice, given the recent virus variants: “Kids are playing a huge role in the transmission of this.”

Get Covid and die, get written about in glowing terms. Collectively refuse to die, and your “allies” will begin to threaten you.

Yet teachers are expected to make up for all these very real material failures with nothing but their love for students, and we blame them even when they’ve done their damnedest to draw attention to those failures. Over sixteen thousand students in Chicago were homeless, so Chicago teachers fought to include funding for homeless kids in their contract and were told, “You can’t bargain for that.” (They still won.) This is not a new story, either: in the 1940s and 50s in New York, the radical teachers of the Teachers Union organized alongside Black parents in Harlem, wrote culturally relevant curricula, lobbied for recreational spaces for kids, and proposed public nursery schools. In return, they were red-baited out of classrooms and had their union crushed. In current-day West Virginia, teacher Leslie Haynes told me of teachers boarding school buses during the pandemic to deliver food boxes to kids who relied on school meals. It was wrenching, she said. “I didn’t realize just how much we carry on our hearts.” We love it when teachers care about our kids, as long as that care comes in the form of individual self-sacrifice. Get Covid and die, get written about in glowing terms. Collectively refuse to die (or to spread the virus to your students and their families), and your “allies” will begin to threaten you.

In Loco Parentis

Teachers like Parker and Schweitzer and Haynes have been working, this entire year, going above and beyond the usual too-much work that teachers are expected to do in order to make up for all the ways society fails children, particularly working-class children of color. They have been packing bags of supplies and hand-delivering them to students; they have been calling parents and having private Zoom sessions and reinventing how they teach. They have been doing all this in many states without getting early priority for vaccination. They have, in fact, been goddamn superheroes. The simple truth is that it’s not good enough, because the one piece of their job that society actually values is the one part that isn’t safe to do without potentially sending Covid cases spiking and even breeding vaccine-resistant variants that will cause more mass death. I’m talking, of course, about the part where they supervise hundreds of students each day so those students’ parents can go to work.

Because if we, collectively, gave a shit about kids’ learning conditions, they would not be attending overcrowded schools with lousy ventilation; ancient, crumbling textbooks; ice-cold water in the sinks; and no nurses. Teachers would not be the ones bargaining for smaller class sizes and counselors in the buildings and green space and recess time. They would not be sharing photos of mold and mouse droppings in their buildings online. Or they would, but they’d have actual support from all the current scolds. They wouldn’t have to be superheroes; they could be human, grieving, depressed, struggling, messy, and mortal like the rest of us.

“To care for these children is not just one thing—it is many things,” Stacy Davis Gates, vice president of the Chicago Teachers Union and mother of three, told me last fall. “We have to resist policymakers focusing on schools only to provide a solution,” she continued.

We have to get out of this fairy tale land that [school] is just going to be a magical place where the violence in their communities doesn’t impact the students, where the racism that they experience from the institutions in this country doesn’t impact the students. . . . All of what we are experiencing with the pandemic, the deep disparities and racial inequities, and then, also, the decades-long assault on public education, all of those things are converging at the same time. So miss me with all of this “Kids are going to be doing so badly because school is all remote.” No. Children are going to be doing badly because they probably are going to be homeless, because you’re going to start evicting people from their homes and we know Black families are going to be hit by that faster than anyone. I have not seen a school be able to provide a solution to a systemic failure of government yet and it has been over twenty years.

It’s particularly cruel that the reason teachers are so easy to scapegoat and exploit is that their work is considered to be close to that of mothers. It’s the very fact that they care that makes it easy for us to take out all of our anxieties on them; as teacher and parent and author Megan Erickson wrote in her book Class War, “the failure of teachers is like the failure of mothers—unthinkable, monstrous, disgusting, the final antisocial act that threatens not only the fabric of the political economy but its perpetuation.”

The Man Runs Everything

Everyone in politics owes the welfare rights movement an apology. They were demonized for decades as that worst of all things: bad mothers. Lazy, refusing to work, their caring didn’t count. And yet the American Rescue Plan, the $1.9 trillion Covid relief bill that passed through Congress without a single Republican vote, quietly proves them right. Rep. Ilhan Omar of Minnesota responded to a tweet asking if the plan would “blow up the Clinton-Gingrich welfare reform and work requirements” with a snarky meme saying, “Yes.” While the amount of money provided is still small—$3,600 for each child under age six and $3,000 each for older children under eighteen—the child tax credit expansion in the bill is, as Omar noted, an acceptance of the primary demand of the welfare rights movement: money for caregivers, because caregiving is work.

The welfare rights movement of the 1960s and 1970s improved conditions for all welfare recipients, but it was led by Black women like Johnnie Tillmon, eventual executive director of the National Welfare Rights Organization. Tillmon was a sharecropper’s daughter from Arkansas who, after fifteen years of doing laundry and working in cotton fields, founded a welfare rights group in her L.A. housing project. There was also Roxanne Jones, who led the Philadelphia WRO, served in the Pennsylvania state senate, and continued organizing among welfare recipients until her death in 1996, right before Clinton signed the Personal Responsibility and Work Opportunity Act into law, “ending welfare as we know it.” As historian Premilla Nadasen wrote in Welfare Warriors, the welfare rights movement “adopted political positions based on a material understanding of the hierarchies of race, class, gender, and sexuality and the way in which these realities were intertwined and inseparable for all people.” They won legal victories, representation, and forms of self-determination; they expanded benefits and grants and influenced the Nixon administration’s push for guaranteed income. They did all this through direct action, disrupting welfare offices, holding sit-ins, marches, and public pressure campaigns—impressive wins for a workers’ movement that had no workplace beyond the home.

Everyone in politics owes the welfare rights movement an apology. They were demonized for decades as that worst of all things: bad mothers.

The welfare system was always designed to help maintain a supply of low-wage workers, and this was doubly true of the Clinton-Gingrich plan. Welfare recipients had to put up with demanding caseworkers, home visits at all hours (not too different from Henry Ford’s inspectors), being shamed and stigmatized as “lazy,” and constant threats to have their children taken away. They knew that arguments around the “dignity of work” would always be used against them. “The dual problems of lack of dignity and low benefits were linked,” Nadasen noted. “The meager monthly sum indicated the lack of respect afforded to both the AFDC program and its recipients and sent a message that recipients’ work as mothers was not valued.” Or, in Tillmon’s words, “AFDC is like a super-sexist marriage. You trade in a man for the man. But you can’t divorce him if he treats you bad. He can divorce you, of course, cut you off anytime he wants. The man runs everything.”

The cornerstone of Lyndon Johnson’s War on Poverty was getting people jobs, but the welfare rights movement pointed out that plenty of people with jobs were still poor. These women were also well aware that there were no provisions for childcare should they get jobs; leader Beulah Sanders, highlighting the criminalization of Black children, explained, “When our children are picked up by the police, they’ll ask them where their parents are. And we’ll have to tell the police that we’ve been forced to let them roam the streets because the Government says we have to go to work.” While white women, Nadasen noted, had been expected to be housewives—a role that by the sixties Betty Friedan and her ilk had begun to reject, calling for access to careers—Black women had always been forced to work. For them, recognition that mothering was work deserving of support was a radical demand. Tillmon suggested the President make “a proclamation that women’s work is real work.”

Instead of jobs, they advocated a guaranteed minimum income—a forerunner of today’s UBI debates, though they’re too often written out of that story—as a way to eliminate the invasive means-testing of AFDC and allow them real autonomy. It would give them the ability to say “no” to crappy low-wage jobs and crappy marriages and every other lousy half-choice offered to poor people in America. As Cleveland organizers wrote, “Nobody argues whether there is enough money in this nation to clothe and feed everyone decently. Everyone agrees that there is enough. If this is true, then WHO decides that some people get their share and other people don’t?” NWRO’s proposal, introduced in Congress by Senator Eugene McCarthy in 1970, would have paid $5,500 to a family of four: over $35,000 in today’s dollars).

Men disappear from these stories, or they waft around in the background.

Nixon’s plan, the Family Assistance Plan, had a lower target—$500 per adult, $300 per child per year, which works out to a bit less than the American Rescue Plan is offering per child—and included work requirements. It died, like so many good ideas (lately, the $15 minimum wage) in the Senate, even as other parts of the welfare state were being expanded. Poor women on welfare instead got more coercive work “incentives,” the opposite of what they’d asked for. As the economic crisis of the 1970s gave birth to neoliberalism and the tax revolts, the Black welfare recipient became, as Melinda wrote, the focus of a vicious backlash that justified slashing away at the social safety net to protect the property values of asset owners. This budget-cutting stigmatizing spread—it’s no accident that the language used to demonize teachers contains so many echoes of the “welfare queen.”

That backlash reached its zenith in the Clinton-Gingrich plan, which turned welfare into a block grant to states, imposing stringent work requirements on recipients and even more punitive means testing. It didn’t end poverty; rather, it made it worse, because, as Tillmon and Sanders and Jones already knew, the jobs they were pushed into—fast food, retail, home care work—don’t pay. The continued refusal to raise the minimum wage has helped hold those women in poverty, along with the aforementioned lack of any sort of social supports for parents and oh, every damn thing the welfare movement said was going to happen. Households headed by single women, as Dylan Matthews wrote in 2016, “saw a larger increase in extreme poverty.” In 2014, as Matthews has noted, only 26 percent of that block grant welfare money was spent actually giving basic assistance to those in need.

Now here we are in 2021, and Joe Biden, who in 1996 voted for that Clinton-Gingrich plan, has quietly approved a temporary basic income payment of a sort to parents that outdoes the controversial Nixon plan. The money expands an existing submerged subsidy, the child tax credit, one of many forms of government support paid mostly to the middle classes, and makes it into a direct payment, meaning that poor people will actually get access to it. As Rachel West, a longtime organizer who is part of Election Action for Caregivers and Global Women’s Strike, told me, the Covid-19 crisis has laid bare “the enormous amount of work that caregiving is. Finally, after a lot of organizing, we are pleased that it’s on the agenda in this way. We’re glad to see recognition and payment, that’s what we want, for the work.”

Even with this halting progress, the women of the welfare rights movement are still not getting their due for their decades of hell-raising and deep organizing around these goals. Yet people like West, whose organizing dates back to that movement, are still here, doing much of the groundwork today. Mainstream feminists might have paid lip service to NWRO’s demands at the time, but they had little interest in taking leadership from poor Black women. They still believed, Friedan-style, that they would obtain dignity through careers. Through work. But now, with almost a million mothers leaving the workforce during the pandemic, it’s worth remembering another point of Tillmon’s: winding up poor and needing welfare is “like a traffic accident. It can happen to anybody, but especially it happens to women.”

Tillmon and her comrades have so much to teach us, as we grope about for a politics that understands race and class as neither separate nor additive, but mutually constitutive. The welfare rights organizers wanted to live how they wanted to live, and what they needed to make that possible was money.

Straight and Narrow

There’s another truth that underlies so many of these articles about moms being stressed, something else the welfare rights movement knew: heterosexuality is broken.

The group Mothers for Adequate Welfare considered marriage “a means for domination more than a means for expressing love” and favored “love, . . . responsibility toward other persons, and freedom to whatever extent that responsibility allows.” They wanted to have sex and relationships when they chose and the economic freedom to do it on their own terms. “Welfare reform” poured money instead into promoting marriage and hunting down biological fathers; this was, of course, just another way to blame women for wanting, rightly, to live and love outside the structures they’d been offered.

Heterosexuality was premised on a now-dead work regime, a bad deal once made in order to get (some) working-class people through the days and weeks and months. But the mediocre promise of the family wage has long since snapped, and here we are, still somehow holding up our end of a shattered bargain.

The deal, for (some) women, was that if we did most of the care we’d get some in return, even if that care was in the form of a home and some money and not really care-shaped at all. But it was a bad deal when it was made—not like we had much choice—and it’s a worse deal now, when so many of us have to do both paid and unpaid work and still aren’t getting nearly enough care ourselves.

The Times reported that

In opposite-sex couples, it is mothers who do the majority of the domestic chores and child-related planning, even when both parents work and the woman is the breadwinner. It is moms who tend to be responsible for the health of their families—the sick days, the doctor’s appointments, the worrying about germs—as well as the caring for older relatives. Moms remain the vast majority of single parents in this country, some of whom have had to choose in this pandemic between leaving young children at home alone or risking their jobs.

Men disappear from these stories, or they waft around in the background. One husband in the Times feature comes home, makes “his usual beeline to the fridge,” and his wife begins to remind him to wash his hands; he, in turn, points out that someone has called on their daughter during her remote schooling. There is no acknowledgement that maybe he could help the daughter, or even remember to wash his own damn hands. Another husband begins popping popcorn while his daughter screams for “MAMA!” and “Later, as she worked, trying to keep Mila entertained, he took a nap on the couch.” I cannot imagine just taking this kind of behavior (this may be why I am single and live alone). Mothers’ stress is a public policy problem, to be sure, but I remain frustrated at the lingering tendency to let men off the hook.

Feminist criticisms of the Wages for Housework movement, in which Silvia Federici and Selma James and so many others took the demand from the welfare rights movement that housework was work and built a political philosophy around it, often warned that it would institutionalize women in the home as carers. But the reality is that these supposedly feminist arguments often do the same thing: while acknowledging the impossibility of “having it all,” they still assume that men are simply incapable of doing fundamentally different labor within a family. They accept that caring, managing, and wrangling are forever a woman’s job—and the only solution is hiring another woman to help.

Heterosexual partnership isn’t really compulsory anymore, but it still serves as the structure around which we are expected to build our lives—even as the frameworks and foundation that structure was built upon have disappeared. This is the reality that is missing from so many “heteropessimism” takes of the last few years. We can get divorced; we can, as some of those articles imply, try not being straight. But heterosexuality as an institution was, as Gramsci noted, designed alongside the rationalization of production, turning the family into its own little standardized industry, and we’ve clung to its vestiges even as the world that built it has fallen apart. You can’t get the equivalent of Henry Ford’s family wage, and you don’t have to deal with his inspectors anymore, but we still too often accept that the tycoon’s preferred arrangement is somehow the natural one.

The radical promise of queerness wasn’t just expanding the range of the bodies we might choose to desire, though that was a central part of it, of course. It was a refusal of the shitty deal of the nuclear family and an attempt to live otherwise, in anything other than a Margaret Thatcher Unit, to take care of each other in all of our fragility and messiness and need. Thatcher, of course, like her buddy Ronald Reagan, backed viciously homophobic policy as she sold off public housing; as politicians like our current president have “evolved,” their progress has mostly been limited to welcoming gay people into the domestic institutions of the couple and the nuclear family. None of that does a damn thing to ease the (still largely gendered) burden of care. We remain cut off from so many radical imaginings of ways we might arrange ourselves to safely share caring responsibilities, and instead we’re all locked down with our individual—or coupled—miseries. But this could always have been otherwise, and this moment of obvious breakdown ought to inspire us to dream differently once again.

One cruel trick of heterosexuality was always that women were convinced that men couldn’t really learn to care—we just had to accept the little bits they might offer because that was how it was. But if there’s anything we should have learned in this bloody awful year of grieving mass death and intimate losses simultaneously, it’s that actually, care has no gender, and we can love each other across six-foot distances and locked-down cities and the world’s oceans.

We need that now. We need to refuse the privatization of grief and stress and pain and loneliness and, most of all, the privatization of care. Respect for our fellow workers, like schoolteachers, who have shouldered the burdens of care, and a wage of a sort for all childcare, are baby steps toward something better. This is the barest of beginnings, but one to cling to as we try to make a livable world from the shards of the one that Covid shattered.

Sarah Jaffe is a reporting fellow at Type Media Center and the author of Work Won’t Love You Back: How Devotion to Our Jobs Keeps Us Exploited, Exhausted, and Alone (2021, Bold Type Books).

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Kuari Pass Trek- Loosing my virginity or the first encounter with the Himalayas.

Beginnings have an innocence experience can’t buy”

It was just like loosing my virginity when I first laid eyes on the snow capped white Himalayan peak- The Nanda Devi, for until then I had been living in the plains of North India, and was subjected to incessant piles of concrete structures and commercial establishments. Laden with people, congestion, noise, dust, and artifice, the city seemed nothing short of a synthetic maze of obscurity, claustrophobia, and oblivion. I had taken trips to the go to hill stations of- Nainital, Shimla, and Manali in my teens, but it was far from exciting or relaxing as one imagines, or as shown in TV. These 3 places were always on the radar of the city dwellers, and every summer- throngs of common folks from the planes would descend over them to get away from the blistering heat of June and July; like rats clamoring to raid a big wedding banquet.
Mussoorie- for example felt nothing like the beautiful hill town drenched in mist and mystery, with long stretches of green deodars, pine and oaks, one reads about in Ruskin bond’s books, for there were more hotels, people, noise, and restaurants, than trees, silence and grand mountain vistas.

“And then there is the most dangerous risk of all — the risk of spending your life not doing what you want on the bet you can buy yourself the freedom to do it later.”

What games destiny plays with our judgement and beliefs, for the day before I was suppose to leave for Auli, the mind had started playing the tricks of logic and gain.”Was it really worth going so far for the trip?It would be tough, and uncomfortable to spend 5 days scrunched up in a tent in -11 degree weather without any heat and warmth.The food would be horrible and there would be no one to accompany and talk except a strange guide.”I had started to second guess myself and the idea seemed good only on paper.
And it all turned out true for the most part except the fact that- all the pleasures and comforts of the city seemed artificial, vain and unappetizing after the first glance of the might peaks.I had never known that sunrise could have such magnificence and allure when rising up from the lap of the Mountain goddess- The Nanda Devi.

Mt. Nanda Devi from a secluded meadow above Auli

When I first sat foot on snow and hunched up straight to take a good look at the uninterrupted panorama of the white and majestic Himalayas from Auli, I was flabbergasted to say the least. A delightful revelation.It was as if someone had punched me in the guts, knocking out every trace of ordinary and bland from the heart and soul, creating a dent in my subconscious. The mountains were so wild, stark and mammoth that I wanted to cry. I breathed in another wonderful moment to keep safe in my heart.I was feeling guilty for unknowingly devoiding myself from their astounding presence and beauty.
It was almost dark when I reached Auli.The air was shrill, the silence- haunting, and cold- bitter and unforgiving.It had just snowed in the upper reaches of the Himalayas- my guide told me.After having a warm supper I plunged inside the bed and went to sleep early.

I started the trek around 7 a.m in the morning. The sun was still behind the mountains and it was freezing outside. It was still dark when I started the ascent with my guide Rakesh leading the way.The first few kilometers were hard to climb due to steep incline and inexperience.But after 2 hours of panting and excuses to catch the breath the climb was over and now the path was straight with slight descent for the next few KM.I was walking on green meadows with a majestic views of the Hathi Ghora, Kamet, Nanda Devi, Mrigthuni, and Dronagiri peaks.

On the way to the campsite- Khullara
The quaint cantonment town- Auli

The muscles had opened up and the trek in the company of warm sunlight and white snow capped peaks turned from adventure to a blessing . It was a delightful walk over the large open meadows of Khullara. The breeze carried the scent of pine and rhododendrons – which were in full bloom during the season. Rakesh had decided to pitch the tent at Khullara-which was 7 KM away from our original campsite after seeing my enthusiasm. “We will make it Sir, I am with you, No worries, “Jai Nanda Devi” he would say everytime I said it was getting darker.
It was completely dark when we reached Khullara.I was exhausted, cold and hungry. Rakesh wasted no time in making maggie and tea and I satiated my hunger by licking everything from the insides of the bowl, for it was the most delicious maggie I had ever eaten. He had pitched the tent by then and we had started the preparation for dinner.It was extremely cold and I had to take out my Rum early. I gave a glass to Rakesh and he gulped it in one go as if it was water.”I will mix some water the next time , else you will finish it even before the vegetables are cooked.”- I said with a grin.
The stars were shining brilliantly bright and there was not a soul in the vicinity. It felt hush and stimulating. The silence was made eerie by a surprising howl from a Jackal, which died down after few minutes.And then all was silent again.The breeze was low and cold, the leaves rustled quietly as if whispering the secrets of the wild night. I had never experienced such serenity and solitude.In the city- you know so many people, and so many people know you, and yet you feel lonely, here-in this stark wilderness- I didn’t know Rakesh, and Rakesh didn’t know me, but not for a second did I feel lonely. Rakesh had prepared an excellent dal and Potato curry which was devoured in minutes.
We drank in the open- near the bonfire, till the cold was bearable, and we did last longer than expected, for I was high and happy. It was my first encounter with serendipity after my father’s demise, and I will never forget that night, for it was extraordinary, adventurous and filled with good food, Rum, feelings and friend.

Mana peak from Kuari pass

We got up a bit late the next day, but Rakesh wasted no time in preparing the breakfast. Everything was packed within minutes and we started for Kuari pass at around 8 a.m.The meadows opened far and wide and there was still few meteres reaching Kuari pass- also know as Curzon’s trail. There was still some climb left and Rakesh told me- It is the best view from anywhere in Garhwal. I pushed myself all the way over the ridge. My head was down and I was still panting, when all of a sudden something caught my eye- It was the Dunagiri Mountain. It seemed so close and white.I looked around and the entire vistas of the Garhwal Himalayas was apparent to the naked eye. It was a 360 degree bird view of all the major Himalyan peaks.

After taking some photos and finishing our lunch we returned back to our camp, and the next day I left for Delhi. As I was about to take my seat in the taxi, Rakesh came running holding a packet of freshly cooked meal from his home-“It’s for the journey. Take care Sir. Come back again soon.”

“I will never forget this experience and the time spent in your company. You are an ideal guide Rakesh, and an extremely generous friend. Thank you for the hospitality, Goodbye.”

“Don’t say goodbye Sir. I know you will come again.You have fallen in love with the Mountains. Once you have lived amongst them,you belong to them, there is no escape. We meet to depart, and we depart to meet.”

And with these words I bade goodbye to Rakesh and to the Mountains, but only for a while, for the love affair with the Himalayas had been initiated and there was no doubt that it was going to last a lifetime.

Mt. Dronagiri

“I do not know how far my experience is common. At times I suffer from the strangest sense of detachment from myself and the world about me; I seem to watch it all from the outside, from somewhere inconceivably remote, out of time, out of space, out of the stress and tragedy of it all. This feeling was very strong upon me after finishing this trip. Here was another side to my dream. Men go to far greater lengths to avoid what they fear than to obtain what they desire. I had been metamorphosed towards the latter. ”

“There are two mistakes one can make along the road to truth… not going all the way, and not starting.” –Buddha

And What about you? Have you felt like this when coming across a Mountain the very first time? Comment below and share the experience of your first trek.

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Author: Tammy V

Shaquille Ali-Yebuah Talks Acting Career & Upcoming Role in New Royal Court Play, Wish List

Shaquille has joined the cast of 2015 Bruntwood prize winner Katherine Soper’s debut play, Wish List, directed by Matthew Xia. The production is a collaboration between The Royal Exchange Theatre and The Royal Court. The British Blacklist caught up with Shaquille as he gears up for the plays’ run in London this coming January.

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A Golden Age – The Black Renaissance in 90’s Film & TV

TBB looks back at the decade that gave rise to a golden age of feature films and television shows written, directed, or starring black talent. This is a story all about how for a brief moment in time, black creatives took their seat at the production table.

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Ricardo Hall, Vice President for Student Affairs, addresses Lehigh families in the “Lehigh University Founder's Celebration 2020” kickoff video. Founder’s Week was celebrated virtually this year. (Courtesy of Lehigh University)

Lehigh celebrates Founder’s Week virtually

Since Asa Packer’s death in 1879, Lehigh has never missed a year of honoring the founder’s legacy.

The university has celebrated Founder’s Day in a multitude of ways throughout the years, such as the GO Campaign Launch in 2018 and the Brown and White Barbeque on the UC Front Lawn in 2019. This year’s celebration however, took place in the form of a virtual week-long event combined with Family Week due to COVID-19.

Founder’s Week began on Oct. 2 with kickoff videos highlighting Packer’s legacy, messages from university administrators and student leaders, and a dedication to the over 4,000 people who virtually signed a beam in the new Health, Science and Technology building.

Leslie Gonnella, associate vice president and chief operating officer for Development and Alumni Relations, knew in-person interactions were going to be limited this year. But she said that wasn’t going to stop her from planning a meaningful week for the Lehigh community.

“We just knew that doing nothing was not an option,” Gonnella said. “We had to figure it out from there. At that point, we just started trying to get creative and come up with how we can create a virtual experience that helps to carry forward Asa’s legacy and gives all of our community an experience that both educates them (and) is also interesting.”

Danielle Moyer, senior director for University Events, said her team wanted to make sure some of the marquee in-person moments from previous year celebrations were included in the videos, such as the class number unveiling and hearing from university leaders.

She said expanding Family Weekend into a full week of activities allowed more engagement opportunities between students, parents and faculty, since anyone could attend the webinars.

“We were really tasked with how do we do something in the world of Zoom, where everybody is in Zoom calls all the time,” Moyer said. “People want to engage with it, and they feel like they get something out of it.”

Throughout the week, students and families had the option of attending 70 programs on the Founder’s Day website

Victoria Aitchison, director of development for the Parent’s Program, hosted an information session for the Parent’s Council on Oct. 8 and said there were about 35 people on the call.

Aitchison said they had breakout rooms during the session so parents and students could exchange names and talk about their Lehigh experiences. She said they brought on guests from the board of trustees and the Community Service Office.

Aitchison said almost 1,500 people logged on at some point throughout the week, and that she was pleased with the turnout at all the sessions.

“This is not an easy time for Lehigh students and Lehigh families as we navigate a lot of information and new challenges,” Aitchison said. “It gives me a lot of hope that the Lehigh spirit is still strong when I see the amount of families that are still logging in and wanting to learn so much about Lehigh.”

Austen Johnson, ‘21, attended the family webinar, “Things I Wish I’d Known My First Year,” on Oct. 3 and was one of three panelists.

The call was an opportunity for orientation leaders to share advice on starting off at Lehigh and how to manage challenges early on.

Johnson said the call was a great opportunity to give back to first-years and their parents.

“I know my freshman year, I relied a lot on other people’s guidance and people helping me out a lot,” he said. “So I thought especially for Family Week and Founder’s Weekend, it was a good idea to give back to the freshmen, their families and help everyone out as best as I could.”

Noah Weaver, ‘23, attended the webinar, “How to Change the World (Whether or Not You Can Travel the World),” through the Office of Creative Inquiry on Oct. 5.

Weaver said there were about 15 people on the call, and there were mainly faculty members or people that work in the office. There were only a few new students who attended to ask questions.

He said the session was helpful to students but wishes there was more attendance from new students.

“It’s hard to motivate people to want to go to a social information sort of event when it’s all online,” Weaver said. “I’m sure everyone with the pandemic is kind of tired of looking at their computers.”

Moyer said they did the best they could from a marketing perspective and gathering students and families together in a safe environment. But she said the week gave them an opportunity to have a diverse group of sessions so that every person felt that there was something they wanted to hear about.

Moyer said she thinks more people tuned into sessions focused on academics this past week than when they were in-person in past years.

Gonnella anticipates that going forward, there will be a mix of a virtual and in-person celebration for Founder’s Day and Family Week.

“What we were committed to doing was building an event that would appeal to the entire Lehigh community … in a way that would speak to anyone where they are, whether they’re a parent, student or faculty member,” Gonnella said.

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text:
John Foley ~ Blue Angel Fighter Pilot & Professional Speaker

~ Current Series ~
100 Interviews with 100 Major Influencers

Could you imagine flying a fighter jet at 1000 miles per hour? Or flying that same jet upside down and only 3 feet away from another jet also going just as fast as you are? To operate at this level you need an incredible amount of training to become one of the best jet pilots on the planet and today’s guest is one of them and his name is John Foley .  John is a retired Blue Angel pilot for the Navy. The “Blues” as they are called, are known to be the absolute best jet pilots on earth. To perform at this level, takes a lot of focus and hard work and much of his training has helped him transfer into the high-performing entrepreneur and public speaker that he is today.

Today on the show, John talks about his experience as a Blue Angel fighter pilot.  He shares with us about training for dog fighting in the air flying at lightning speed. John talks about what it is like flying at 1000 miles per hour, the scariest flight he ever made almost leading to disaster, and how he mastered his thoughts and emotions to get behind the pilots seat the very next day.  As you could imagine it takes an intense high-performance mentality, so we also ask John about focus, meditation, visualization, flow-state and how to master your mindset for success. Lastly, John shares about applying this to business and having a professional speaking career!

  06:15: Who is John Foley & What is a Blue Angel?

  12:25: What is Dog Fighting for Pilots?

  14:20: Using Focus, Visualization & Debriefing as a Fighter Pilot

  16:55: Flying Upside Down 3 Feet Away From Another Jet

  20:20: Becoming a Blue Angel Fighter Pilot

  24:40: Mentalities Between Blue Angel’s and Other Pilots

  26:25: What is it Like at 1000 Miles Per Hour?

  29:20: John’s Scariest Flight

  35:20: Preparing to Fly Again After Almost Dying

  40:50: John on Meditation

  45:15: Focus and Flow-State from a Professional Fighter Pilot

  49:10: Forming a New Habit

  51:55: Keeping Energy Levels High

  58:00: Creating a Professional Speaking Career

1:03:25: Determining Your Monetary Worth as a Speaker

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Tucker Max ~ Influencer and Author

~ Current Series ~
100 Interviews with 100 Major Influencers

Having a polarizing personality helps many people gain influence and fame.  It helps potential fans understand exactly what they stand for, and quite often they are the person saying and doing things that others wish they could do or should do themselves.  Today’s guest started his career with one of the most controversial personalities out there. In 2009, he was ranked as Time Magazine’s Top Influential People, and his name is Tucker Max.

Tucker is the author of many New York Times best-selling books such as, I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell, Assholes Finish First, What Women Want, Sloppy Seconds, and Hilarity Ensues. Tucker features wild stories he had with partying and women that were true stories of his life, many of which brought a lot of comedy and controversy to surface. He continued this lifestyle and stories for many years until 2012 when he decided he was done with the lifestyle after he had begun psychotherapy.  Today, he is married with three children and on the show, Tucker talks a bit about being a major author and influencer, comedy, his life, his past, the growth that came from his experiences, his biggest regrets, and of course how he sees life today.

09:30: Why Tucker Lives in Austin, Texas

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36:45: Tucker’s Regrets

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Hey podcast listeners, today we are hopping on the mic with Hollis Carter. Hollis is an internet marketer from back in the day when it was a Wild Wild West show. He has had quite a bit of success and one of the first people to create a video sales letter. Throughout his years as an entrepreneur, he kept going to these conferences that were all about “pitching and selling”. After many different conferences, his now partner Michael Lovich and he got to talking about creating a community of high-level entrepreneurs and high-caliber people that forbid ‘pitching and selling’ at their events. Thus, they created a community of entrepreneurs called Baby Bathwater Institute.

Each year, they have an event on an island in Croatia called Baby Bathwater Island. Last year, I attended and I was blown away by the content. A friend of mine said it was kind of like Mario Bros. the video game, and warping from Level 2 to Level 12 in a matter of a few short days. I couldn’t agree more, and as soon as I left the event last year, I knew I wanted to attend again this year. That event is coming up soon, at the end of June on an Island in Croatia. On the show today, Hollis and I chat about the experience of being on the island and what it like running a community of high-profile entrepreneurs, influencers and thought leaders. One thing that I really like about their events, is that there are no paid professional speakers. If someone is sharing their content, it is because they have proven their methods, and they are there to share and be a part of the community.

02.55:  A Bit About Baby Bathwater Island & Hollis

08:10:  What is it like on Baby Bathwater Island?

16:35:  Having No Sales Community

18:05:  Spoilers for Workshops on the Island in 2019

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Hey, listeners welcome to the show today and I have to tell you I am incredibly excited for today’s guest. Not only is he the author of two of my top read books but he is leading researcher on cutting-edge technology and information regarding flow and flow-state, his name is Steven Kotler.

Steven is the author of numerous books including Bold and Abundance, both he co-authored with Peter Diamandis. He is also the author of West of Jesus, Tomorrowland, The Rise of Superman, and Stealing Fire. The latter two being the two books I have read of his and both I highly recommend to anyone.  On the show today, we get to chat with Steven for an hour and a half about a variety of subjects that Steven specializes in, including many topics that are addressed in his new novel, Last Tango in Cyberspace.

At the beginning of the show, we get to know Steven’s backstory for a few minutes before we delve deep into Flow, Flow-States, the science behind flow, and some incredible stories of high-performers, including Steven, while they were in Flow-State and how it directly affected their performance. We then dive into the details of Last Tango in Cyberspace and some important issues that the storyline addresses throughout the novel.  In the book and on the podcast, we talk about technology and where it is headed, artificial intelligence becoming conscious, psychedelics and using them to expand technology, empathy and space tourism. At the end of the podcast, we get to learn how Steven uses flow, his favorite meditation techniques, and his daily routine.

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text:
Machinic Joie de Vivre – on the Schröeder House

The Schröder house was designed by Gerrit Reitvald for Truus Schröder-Schräder - a Dutch sociolite, designer, feminist, and mother of three. It is designed in the 'De Stijl' or neoplasticism style and is a UNESCO World Heritage Site. This essay is a commentary on Truus' “vision of family life" and how the Schröder home reflects them.

Machinic Joie de Vivre

Truus Schröeder’s “vision of family life in the modern world,” is exemplified by idea exchange facilitated by the home.§

What is unique about the Schröeder home is that it is not just a structure. It is almost like another body, a living architecture with a joyful and educational personality. The home telescopes “individual experiences and interpersonal relationships,” and it requires interaction to be understood, for it to ‘enter into itself.’§ It is only by interacting with the home that one is able to perceive its quirks and actively help shape the home - this is how the house becomes living. As the house is in itself an ‘individual’, the person-space interaction is actually subverted into a person-person relationship; one that is emblematic of a caregiver’s protective warmth. Thus, the individual is not crushed by the space but welcomed, embedded into it, like a hug.

The house must maintain this protective - yet friendly - duality. The street facade of the house, in its hues of grey and white imposes a visual solidness that feels almost like armor. The placement of the windows and the balcony on the second levels gives the impression that the street remains under surveillance from the house. Yet, the oddly playful geometric shapes break up any association with traditional architectural facades or typological associations, which gives the house an uncharted freedom of expression and experimentation in its very character.

The site of the home, Prins Hendriklaan, speaks to this dual elusiveness as well; urban, suburban, and rural types reveal themselves depending on which window you look out of.§ Rietveld's clever design of two fronts, one suited to the neighbors and one with a formal entrance, as well as the affinity to Schorder’s childhood home, speaks allegorically to Schröeder’s vision: one of free idea exchange and a ‘joie de vivre’ while managing this needed protective aura.§

The desire to allow for free idea exchange is symbolized through the home’s liberal usage of free space. Free space is where “conversations could be wide-ranging, and where focused activities... might also be carried out.”§ Each activity carries with it a particular movement, a way of expression. The free space accommodates all of them. It is by this that the free space acts as a medium where ideas float, percolate, and concurrently function as a space that gives permission for these types of activities to occur at all.The free space allows for adults and children to constantly flow and ebb around each other, exchanging information and ideas by virtue of their proximity.§

The free-idea exchange is communicated not just in the openness of its ceilings, but also in the careful positioning of each element to create a “ritual of movement.” Schröeder’s desire for a ‘modern’ freedom is encapsulated through the home’s free space plan. By removing the mundane, “ritually repeated actions,” and forcing (or allowing) constant choice to occur, imbuing individuals with an environmental agency, the home allows the space participant to self-actualize; which is also paradigmatic of the caregiver.§

As the free space is exemplary of its own type of freedom, so are the partitions that are used in the home. The constant tactile engagement with the partitions ground the space participant in the home’s paradoxical materiality; as one moves the partitions back and forth, one is forced (or ‘asked’) to make the choice for privacy. Ultimately, this is what imbues the home with that “modern consciousness,” the idea of which is that the home “was designed and built with a larger purpose in mind,” one that is clearly rooted in protected freedom of choice for Schröeder. §

Children’s natural curiosity and Truus’ willingness to foster that is what made the Schröeder house ‘successful’. Reitveld expresses this beautifully in his 1932 article, where he notes that architecture has been liberated from “the plastic dimension… the building… is in active relationship to human beings… will then have to adopt an active attitude towards it in order to be able to experience its qualities.”§ Ironically, too, when Reitveld first began the project the process of architecture, for him, was like “assembling a kit of parts - sections of flat wall, thin metal or wooden supports.”§ Could we effectively reproduce the Schröeder house given a modular kit of its elements? A free plan, free facade, some Rietvaldian furniture, and a few colorful squares?! No. The Schröeder house was successful because of its homeostatic condition - that of a body keeping itself in equilibrium with its commitment to protection, and freedom for curiosity.

The physical exertions of the home to fulfill Schröeder’s anti-hierarchical ideas are in good taste - and as such, it functions as intended, as an “intensely modern architectural environment.”§ Modern by virtue of the physiological opportunities it grants its participants, a space where all “could make choices about how they wanted to live.”§ Modern, also, because Schröeder’s vision, and even a very deep part of herself, was communicated through the home. She was the client and the designer and her joyousness carried throughout making the home a home.

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text: The New York State Social Justice Collective of the Minority Bar Association of Western New York held a Memorial Day processional event in memory of the unjustly loss of Black and Brown lives. The Buffalo Chapter of the NAACP and Thomas Edwards Funeral Home joined them in the Memorial Day procession which was led by Darrell Saxon, Owner and Director, of the Thomas Edwards Funeral Home. There was a brief gathering, which included prayer, in front of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.’s statute to kick off the event. In a press release, the Social Justice Collective noted: “The killing of George Floyd has shaken our world on a national scale. The killing of Daniel Prude happened in our neighboring city. We can no longer ignore the disparate effects of racial and social injustices affecting our communities. The Minority Bar Association of WNY is planning PEACEFUL and impactful events to remind our communities that Black and Brown lives always matter.” A contingent of police officers were also in attendance in a show of solidarity. Attorney John Elmore, a member of the minority Bar Association and one of the speakers told the media “there’s been a lot of positive changes but there still has to be more.”(Attorney Elmore is pictured top left , and Mr. Saxon, top, right.) Street Legacy Photos By Darvin Adams


text:
Kids who sleep more cope better
October 15th, 2012
12:02 AM ET

Kids who sleep more cope better

Sleepy school children make crabby classmates, while students who get plenty of sleep are better behaved, according to a new study published this week in the journal Pediatrics.

"Extending sleep opens the door to an effective, feasible way to improve children's health and performance," says study author Reut Gruber, director of the Attention Behavior and Sleep Lab at the Douglas Research Center in Quebec, Canada.

The study

Gruber and his colleagues wanted to find out if the behavior of elementary school children was affected by how much sleep they got. The researchers, with the permission of parents, enrolled 34 students ages 7 to 11 in the study. These were healthy kids who didn't have sleep problems or behavior or academic issues.
During one week of school, half the students were put to bed earlier than normal, averaging about 27 minutes more sleep a night. The other half stayed up later than their routine bedtime, losing about 54 minutes of shut-eye each evening.

The results

Teachers - who didn't know the sleep status of the students - reported significant differences in how the children behaved and coped with everyday challenges. Students who were sleep-deprived not only seemed overly tired, but were more impulsive and irritable than their well-rested classmates. They were quick to cry, lose their tempers or get frustrated.

The children who got plenty of sleep had a better handle on their emotions and were more alert in class.

Sleep experts say these results make sense and provide more evidence about the importance of sleep.

"We know that sleep deprivation can affect memory, creativity, verbal creativity and even things like judgment and motivation and being (engaged) in the classroom," explains Dr. Judith Owens, director of sleep medicine at Children's National Medical Center in Washington. "When you're sleepy, (being engaged) isn't going to happen."

And when children have trouble coping with day-to-day situations, Owens adds, this can affect a child's relationship with teachers, as well as their success in school, social skills and the ability to get along with peers.

Tips for parents

So how do you know if your child is getting enough sleep? Children in elementary school generally need between 10 to 11 hours each evening, but no two children are alike. Parents should look for clues, experts say.

"Kids in this age range should not be sleepy during the day," Owens says. "If the are falling asleep in the car or watching TV, that's a red flag."

Another way to gauge your child's sleep need is to pay attention to how much they sleep during school vacations, when they're sleeping without a time schedule. If they consistently sleep longer than on school nights, your child probably isn't getting enough sleep.

Take action

Parents can take steps to get their children off to bed at a reasonable hour.

- About a half hour before bedtime, have your kids start winding down - put down the electronic devices, turn off the TV and shut down the computer
- Have a consistent bedtime and wake time and try to make this apply to the weekends as well
- Be good role models for your children. Go to bed at a reasonable time and talk to them about the importance of sleep

"Consider that (sleep) is one of the building blocks of your child's health, well-being and academic success," Owens says. "It's equivalent to good nutrition, exercise and all the other things we try to foster and provide for our children. You've got to put sleep right up there at the top of the list."

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CC#17: JCalacanis Exposes Fraudsters of Clubhouse

Jason Calacanis, Barbara Corcoran, and others expose 22 year old "success coach" charging $6,000 per session to a person w/ suicidal thoughts.

Late Tuesday night, Jason Calacanis, a prominent angel investor, set out on a mission to expose some of the shady techniques that are being used to scam innocent people on clubhouse as well as the scam artists who are using them.

However, this story actually dates back to the night of February 22nd, when Jason Calacanis decided to join one of these “MEGA Success” Coaching rooms. He was pretty shocked when he heard one of the coaches say they were charging rates of well over $10,000 for their services. He raised his hand and once he got on stage, he curiously asked “What qualifies you to charge so much? What business have you built?”

The response from the coaches: they muted Jason and kicked him off the stage. He shortly thereafter created a room to share his experience. Two of the most well known “coaches” that are almost always running these rooms are JT Foxx and Brad Hager.

In Jason’s room, he shared his experience and asked others about theirs. The room managed to attract Brad Hager’s wife, Marcia. Jason promptly invited her on the stage, and when she got there, she had a lot to say. She seemed notably upset and began shaming Jason for exposing her and her husband.

Fast forward to the night of March 8th.

One of the top rooms on clubhouse was once again being run by a few “life & business coaches” who don’t exactly have their clients’ best interest in mind. In response, Jason Calacanis, along with Taylor Monks and Tyler Crowley, quickly assembled his troops and got to work. They started a room to expose these fraudsters and interview people who have fallen victim to their scams.

Shortly after the room had started, Barbara Corcoran, a real estate mogul and famously one of the sharks on ABC’s Shark Tank, joined to share something she had just experienced in the other room.

”I had no idea these guys were illegitimate. I spent 20 minutes on stage yapping like an idiot before realizing I was in the wrong room!”

Someone who was on the stage happened to be in the other room when Barbara was speaking. They said

”I was surprised that you were speaking in that room and being so vulnerable. I was watching how they were treating you and trying to get you to copy other people’s voices—I couldn’t believe it was happening! It felt terrible! Especially today, on International Women’s Day.”

Barbara replied
”You know, it’s an odd thing. I wasn’t the least bit offended. It was like I walked into a bar scene and people were all laughing and joking, which is fine. But what really triggered me was this: after I spoke, there were a couple of bad pitches, and then there was a good pitch from a very legitimate female founder. The moderators were all trying to “get in her pants” in a financial way. I wasn’t offended by the way they spoke to me, but I was definitely triggered when I saw them trying to take advantage of that founder. They asked how much equity she would give up to have one of them as a coach. We’ve got to get those foxes out of the henhouse!”

Shortly after Barbara left, one of these coaches ended up joining the room. Her name was Lauren Tickner.

Jason: “Hey Lauren, what do you charge for coaching, roughly? And what do you help people with?

Lauren: “$5,000 for 3-months. The purpose of the coaching is to help them launch their own coaching business, we typically work with coaches that have a proven track record of already helping people. I’m 24 now, but I got started when I was 16. We help personal trainers that have lost their business, we gave them all the systems to move their business online. Basically, we give. them all the systems to grow their business online.”

Coffeezilla: “I’ve talked to more coaches than anyone on the planet. Every single one of them, even the most unethical people, they all say “those other guys are so unethical” and that always makes me wonder: what’s different about you?”

Lauren: “I really think the client results is what differentiates the coach.”

One of the moderators asked “So you’re basically a coach teaching other coaches how to coach coaches of coaches?”

Vitaliy: “I’ve been in those rooms and seen how they do it. In those big rooms, I’ve witnessed JT taking a lot of money from people. In one particular case, they negotiated the price down to $2000, but for that price, he would have one of his partners help them instead of him. People come with real businesses and real problems and they think they will get real advice. They either get laughed at or get really generalist advice such as “Yeah run a bunch of ads, but DM me. I wrote a book on x topic and can help you” I’ve heard people agreeing to pay $2000 for these coaches’ services more than once. I cannot imagine how many people they scammed for $2000 in those rooms!”

These “coaches” are known to use high-pressure sales tactics to prey on vulnerable business owners who are struggling, and they promise to help them make a lot of money.

Kevin: “From 2013-2018, I was a videographer for some of these coaches in the dating space. I helped them make courses and I was doing this from an honest place. It was an opportunity for me to make income and I had no idea these things were scammy. I met 90% of the people in The Game. It’s a very small ecosystem. I met Tai Lopez; Marczell was actually hired by one of these companies after I left. I no longer do this - but I just wanted to add that these guys are delusional, and what’s even crazier is how much they believe their own BS. They’re almost scamming themselves in a sense.”

Jordan: “I was in a room listening to JT Foxx and there were a bunch of bad pitches. Finally, there was an impressive one that was doing $400k profit a month on $500k revenue. He had no idea about investment mechanics, he asked for 200k for 15%.  JT said “…you don’t need the capital, you need mentorship. What would you give for mentorship?” He said he would give 30%. JT said he would take 10% and asked who else wanted in. I jumped on stage and explained the industry standards—typically an advisory share is no larger than 2%—and they muted me and kicked me off. I messaged him privately and saved him from being taken advantage of.”

If you thought these were bad, wait till you hear this story that Jordan shared

“My friend Jeremy Green had hired this coach by the name of Marczell Klein. After realizing he was a fraud, Jeremy decided to set him up. He texted Marczell introducing him to a women and said “Hey a friend of mine really needs help, and she’s filthy rich” The person posing as this damsel in distress messages coach Marczell saying she has had suicidal thoughts and is asking if she should get professional help. To which Marczell allegedly replied

”No, those people will just load you up on drugs. I’m the best “coach” in the world and I can help you.” He then quoted the lady $25,000 for 4-months of coaching, which includes 1 session per week. Unaware that he was being set up, he also texted Jeremy saying “If you help me close this, I’ll give you a 10% cut.”

In Marczell’s IG bio (@marczell) it states World’s #1 Success Coach. It used to say this in his clubhouse bio as well and when he was confronted about it, he denied it at first and then he said “Someone else wrote my bio.”

Jeremy: “I became friends with Marczel—he would come over and do this thing (NLP) and it would work for a day. My wife kept saying he’s a fraud. And one day I said I want to help people do this. He turned to me and said (he knows I have a network, and friends with celebrities) you do the outreach and I can hypnotize people out of their money. He wanted me to introduce him to Tony Robbins cause that’s his idol.”

Jason Calacanis: “So you’re charging over $6000 per session? How long are these sessions? What are your qualifications that allows you to charge so much. Who trained you?”

Marczell: “I did a year-long hypnotist program at an accredited institution where we did clinical hours. I use my hypnotism to help change people’s mindsets so they can achieve the health, wealth and results they want. I actually charge way more than this in other cases, I only gave her a discount because Jeremy was a previous client of mine.”

Jason: So you charge Jeremy $100, but you charged this lady $25,000?

Marczell: “Jeremy worked with me when I was 19 years old, I’m 22 now. A lot can change in those 3 years.”

Jason: You mentioned you made a lot last year, how much did you make?

Marczell: “I made $18 million.”

Another coach was mentioned who had been claiming to be a 7-figure coach, and a quick google search showed that she had taken out. a $2200 PPP loan last Summer. Not to mention, she was living out of her parents house. Unfortunately, I did not get the name of this one.

There were a whole other set of individuals that were mentioned, not all of whom disguise themselves as coaches. One of the most frequently mentioned ones was Manny Fernandez, who claims to be a “Silicon Valley Tech Investor” and uses a 2-minute feature he had on CNBC a long time ago for credibility. It turns out, Manny is not in very good standing with the SEC.

Even Grant Cardone appears to have misled investors.

This all raises an interesting question - who do you trust? Who’s legit and who’s not?

My imperfect, short answer is to look for certain key words. You’ll almost never hear a successful startup founder bragging in their bio about how many sales they’ve made or making vague statements like “Entrepreneur” without including more details, instead they’ll typically say something along the lines of “co-founder of x”. Conversely, you’ll almost never see the word “startup” or “tech” in the bios of these “coaches”, because it’s very likely they’ve never built anything. Of course, there will be exceptions to these, but it’s a starting point.

There are also a few good platforms that are constantly exposing these fraudsters:

Baller Busters

And of course, JCalacanis.


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Saturday, April 17, 2021

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Docteur en communication, Université de Montréal

Vincent Denault holds a Ph.D. in Communication (Université de Montréal, 2020) and a Master of Laws (Université du Québec à Montréal, 2015). His research focuses primarily on issues related to witness testimony, credibility assessment, deception detection, and nonverbal communication in courtrooms. Vincent Denault is the co-founder and co-director of the Center for Studies in Nonverbal Communication Sciences of the Research Center of the Montreal Mental Health University Institute. He is the inaugural recipient of the Emerging Scholar Award (2016) of the Nonverbal Division of the National Communication Association. Vincent Denault is also a lawyer and a coroner investigating deaths that occurred as a result of negligence or in obscure or violent circumstances.

  • –present
    Ph.D. Candidate (Communication), Université de Montréal

  • 2015
    Université du Québec à Montréal, Master of Laws
  • 2007
    Université du Québec à Montréal, Bachelor of Laws


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Articles on Sweat

Displaying all articles

Why do I sweat so much?

Sweating is usually our body's way of stopping us from overheating. But if excess sweating is a problem for you, there's help.
When we get hot, sensors in the body tell the brain. The brain then tells the sweat glands to work, and we sweat. Marcella Cheng/NY-CC-BD

Curious Kids: What happens in the body when we sweat?

Sweat comes from special parts in our skin called glands. You might be able to see them if you have a very strong magnifying glass.
Sweat creates evaporative cooling for your body, with the amount required determined by your size and shape, not your gender. from

Health Check: do men really sweat more than women?

They say 'men sweat, while women glow'. But new research shows gender is not the reason for different levels of sweating.
Blood is just one of the body fluids we need to survive. Blood bag via

Eleven body fluids we couldn’t live without

By learning a bit more about these body fluids, we can develop a deeper appreciation for the beauty and complexity of our own biology.
Hyperhidrosis or excessive sweating affects around 3% of the population. Jayel Aheram

Explainer: why do I sweat so much and how can I stop it?

Everybody sweats, some more than others. It’s a physiological reaction to heat and the body’s mechanism to regulate core temperate. Individual sweat rates vary and are influenced by factors such as ambient…

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