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text:
Metasm is a cross-architecture assembler, disassembler, linker, and debugger. It is written in such a way that it is easy to add support for new architectures. For now, the following architectures are in:
  • Intel Ia32.txt (16 and 32bits)
  • Intel X86_64.txt (aka Ia32 64bits, X64, AMD64)
  • MIPS
  • PowerPC
  • Sh4
Supports low and high-level debugging support (Ia32 only for now) under Windows, Linux and remote (via a gdbserver). Metasm is included in Metasploit by default.
  • Install Metasm gem
    gem install metasm
    More about installation here.

Converting Assembly to Op-code - metasm-shell.rb

You can find metasm-shell in ruby gems default path after installation. In my case, it's located in /var/lib/gems/2.1.0/gems/metasm-1.0.2/samples
  • Run it
ruby metasm-shell.rb
type "exit" or "quit" to quit
use ";" for newline
as you can see you are now in the shell's prompt
  • Find assembly op-code
asm> nop nop
asm> call [eax]
asm> push esp
asm> pop eax
Note: it is possible to do exactly the same thing with a metasploit embedded tool: nasm_shell.
$ /opt/metasploit/tools/exploit/nasm_shell.rb
nasm > jmp esp
00000000 FFE4 jmp esp

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software: Apache Nutch 1.19 (modified, https://github.com/commoncrawl/nutch/)
robots: checked via crawler-commons 1.4-SNAPSHOT (https://github.com/crawler-commons/crawler-commons)
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text:
Weight watchers weigh-in results, biggest loser, and I’m doing fine.

weigh-in-002So last night I weighed-in.  I just stepped on that scale with bravery and courage.  But when I saw a 2.2 lb gain my heart sunk a little.  I figured I would gain and I knew that there was a possibility of gaining back the three pounds that I had lost, but I was still in denial.  Now I don’t think that I actually gained 2 pounds of fat but nevertheless, I gained.  I took it pretty hard for about 10 minutes until my WW leader started the meeting and made me laugh.  Then I popped out of my little funk and said, “Oh well, it is what it is.  There is no changing that number right now so I will move on with my life.  I know what I need to do”.  The best part of about this gain is that I know why I gained and it is no where near being a mystery.  That means it is easily remedied.  Amen to that.  I weigh 187.2 again.

Stay updated on my weigh-ins every week by subscribing to my blog.  You can subscribe via email or feed.

I still did not count my point yesterday but this week is a new week.  I did not eat bad food at all but I just did not count and not counting is a bad habit to get into.  I am right back to counting and journaling today.  It’s not hard to count and journal, it is just that I have to make myself do it.  The old way of life tells me I don’t need to but the new me says I will and I have to in order to keep the weight off.  I am thankful for my WW meeting as it is a great source of help and strength whether I am gaining or losing.  Going to meetings is essential for me.

I watched the biggest loser last night after my weigh-in.  It was a pretty good show although I was disappoint with the fact that they did not do their own weigh-in.  I am still so pleased that for the most part both teams are acting as they are one big team.  They still seem to realize that although they are playing a game for $250,000.00, they are also in a far more important game of life and death.  It was also interesting to see Bob break down and cry.  I can understand their hurt and discouragement because they probably still believe that it is the trainer who is getting the results for them.  I don’t think they fully realize that it is THEIR hard work that is taking of the pounds.  They will soon enough and the trainers are the perfect element of motivation that they need right now.  I love this show.

All in all I am feeling good and after reading Kim’s comment to me I am feeling stronger then ever regarding my weigh-in results and future “big picture”.  Thanks Kim and thank you all for all of you support and care.

37 Responses to “Weight watchers weigh-in results, biggest loser, and I’m doing fine.”

  1. 1 Kim
    February 25, 2009 at 10:18 am

    Way to be brave and way to no tlet the scale dictate who you will be or how you will be.

  2. February 25, 2009 at 11:00 am

    Have you ever tried doing Core/Simply Filling technique of WW? I love it, and it’s nice for a change from counting points for everything you eat.

    Plus, from a lot of your meals/snacks I’ve seen, a good deal of your food falls into the “filling foods”. Just something to chew on 🙂

    Good job getting out the funk! Sometimes that’s the hardest part.

    • 4 run4change
      February 25, 2009 at 11:02 am

      I have done CORE before. It works good but I tend to go overboard on fruit when I do it and I have never lost and usually gain when I do it. I like it a lot though.

  3. 5 Kim
    February 25, 2009 at 11:05 am

    Oh I was waiting for 12:15 EST to go read all about YOU, but then was in teh middle of writing my blog post for the day which actually turned into 2! I almost saved my blog as draft right at 12:15 but figured I would finish first…jsut in case it was there right then, I didn;t want to be disappointed!

    ANyway, thanks for the kudos in yoru blog entry! I had no idea!

    • 6 run4change
      February 25, 2009 at 11:22 am

      Cool Kim. Thanks for being here for me. 🙂 I will make sure to take off in a minute and check out your blog

  4. February 25, 2009 at 11:17 am

    TBL is on again tonight. They cut it to one hour last night and one hour tongiht due to the presidential address. They will have their weigh in tonight. GO BLUE TEAM…. well Sione and Filipe

  5. February 25, 2009 at 11:21 am

    Thumbs up!

    (btw…that’s a lot of coffee carafe’s in your picture up there!)

  6. February 25, 2009 at 2:38 pm

    Glad you are feeling better about your gain. It is all about learning when we are weak and likely to slip into our ‘old’ selves.

    I had an awesome run today and it made me think about you. Actually, I often think about you when running. I was able to run for 15 minutes without stopping. That’s a record for me! Thanks for always inspiring me Jason. 🙂

    • 12 run4change
      February 25, 2009 at 2:52 pm

      That is so awesome. Great job. You must have felt like a mighty conqueror. 15 minutes is fantastic. Keep it a rollin Rebecca

  7. 13 kaxfenix
    February 25, 2009 at 2:41 pm

    Good attitude, no worries on the weight gain!!! Look at it this way at least you are not 257! I would kill to be 187 at the moment 🙂

  8. 15 afatgirl
    February 25, 2009 at 3:12 pm

    I think you have a great attitude about your gain this week. Sure, it sucks. But, this week is a new week.

    I haven’t watched the Biggest Loser this season (no tv here either!) but you’ve inspired me to maybe buy it on iTunes… I do miss watching.

  9. 17 RobFitness
    February 25, 2009 at 4:27 pm

    Sorry that i have been away from your blog lately. I sure do miss a lot of posts in a short period of time. Boy you love to write don’t ya 🙂 I love it though and your doing great at it. Proud of you for not letting the small gain get the best of you. You owned up to, let it go and you’re moving forward. That’s one great attitude you have there and hopefully some of it will rub off on me as well.

  10. February 25, 2009 at 5:07 pm

    Great attitude. I cried through most of my meeting last Saturday, so I’m really proud that you were able to snap out of it rather quickly. It’s good that you know what you are doing and what you need to do now. I’m out of the habit of tracking, so thanks for the reminder. I will be getting back to it tomorrow. Take care, Melissa

  11. February 25, 2009 at 5:18 pm

    It is so difficult to step on the scale when you know you are up. I skipped my meeting this morning because I didn’t want to step on the scale and see what I knew would be gain. Probably a big gain. Possibly a gain of everything I lost over the last few weeks. Fack.

    It was really brave of you to go to your meeting. As always, you are inspiring. I think I’ll head to a meeting Friday and suck it up.

    • 22 run4change
      February 25, 2009 at 5:28 pm

      Go for it p4. No matter how the weigh in goes, you way the same regardless. You might skip the scale but it don’t change the weight. It took me forever to think like that. You will do fine and if you do gain and then just hop on board and start again. Wow. I just wrote a lot of “and”. 🙂

  12. February 25, 2009 at 5:20 pm

    Also, I feel like there could have been more ballad-like angsty sad music during slow motion hugs in yesterday’s the biggest loser.

    • 24 run4change
      February 25, 2009 at 5:30 pm

      Bwa ahahahahhhahahalkdngasi 🙂 🙂 That is hilarious. I would have loved to the “this is the end” by the doors during the creepy part of the song.

  13. February 25, 2009 at 6:12 pm

    P4 you just made me crack up about your biggest loser comment. Even my kids were talking about it. Thanks. Also, I used to skip meetings when I thought I had gained sometimes I went anyway and weighed in and was pleasantly surprised. Also, be careful about skipping it can lead to skipping more and more meetings and can be hard to get back into it, so I’m glad you said you will find a Friday meeting. You know what you need to do and we are here for you. You can get to that meeting and you can do what you need to do. Wahhhooooo!! that’s my cheer for you P4.

  14. 27 Clint
    February 25, 2009 at 8:03 pm

    Funny…I also was thinking (and typing, naturally) about The Biggest Loser tonight, only in a more negative light: I think that, at least for people just starting out on their Big Weight Loss Gambit, that a show depicting people losing 12 pounds every week can actually be counter-productive, because your reality just isn’t going to imitate TV. It can make it hard to appreciate that you’re a pound less than you were last week when people are getting the stink-eye on TV for “only” losing five.

    • 28 run4change
      February 25, 2009 at 9:14 pm

      Definitely not realistic results for people who have to work and be with loved ones. Certainly possible with 8 free hours a day to work out though. I have seen people trying to expect similar losses as the biggest loser and it is setting them up for disappointment

  15. February 25, 2009 at 8:54 pm

    Good job just taking it as a learning experience. A gain is hard. I think the little ones are worse though. Consider it as a challenge to blast through in this new week.

    They ended BL after an hour to show the Presidential address but here in Alaska that was on 5 hours before due to the live feed/time difference so BL just abruptly ended. They cut to a commercial and then started some Alaska history show. No credits or end comments. Just over. Rather confusing until my husband did the math and realized that was when you were scheduled to watch the President live.

  16. 31 donna
    February 25, 2009 at 10:31 pm

    Hey whats that song they sing “youre gonna make it after all”,thats you Jason.Oh man am I ever old thats from the mary tyler moore show,now Im depressed.But you are you know,gonna make it no matter what!

  17. February 26, 2009 at 7:53 am

    I have to weigh in tonight and I’m nervous! reading this reminds me that it’s not the end of the world if I do gain, and i’m moving in the right direction. thanks for that (and congrats on your progress) 🙂

  18. February 27, 2009 at 3:00 am

    Clint, one thing about BL is that the trainers repeatedly say that the show is not real life and that they are the olympics of weight loss. They tell them that a pound or two a week at home is great and healthy, so even though it is true that a lot of people are going to see that and be disappointed at least they are saying it. Afterall, it is still a TV show when it is all said and done.

    • 36 run4change
      February 27, 2009 at 5:06 am

      So right Melissa. Bottom line, The Biggest Loser is a business for profit. They do what they need to do to make money with the show. That is it. I still love to watch though

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right now…

Lindsay of Lindsay’s List just posted a currently post and I thought it was fun…so per usual, I’m copycatting.

Currently: in Jammie’s with a coffee enjoying my last few hours of respite in Chicago. (Seriously, these are the coziest blankets ever, I may never leave.)

Current Inspiration: The folks who do the work of social justice and care both in our own fractured country and others. Giving of oneself in service or voice for others is amazing. Pray for peace and work for justice.

Current Book: Pastrix by Nadia Bolz-Weber. She’s a freaking genius.

Current Tune: The Eye by Brandi Carlile. (The entire album comes out in March.) She, too, is a freaking genius.

Current Drink: Pumpkin Vanilla Latte Kcups from Crazy Cups Coffee. Also, Deep Eddy Ruby Red with Prosecco. (This stuff is from Austin, so it’s automatically good.)

Current Foods: If it is comforting and has cheese, it is likely going in my belly! Also-Reese’s trees. Those dastardly Devils need to not exist.

Current Show(s): The Good Wife and How I Met Your Mother are my current binges. I just finished Gilmore Girls from start to finish and that was really cathartic.

Current Outfit: Gap boot cut cords with something warm and cashmere-y on top. These pants were made for my saddle bags!

Current Indulgence: see Reese’s trees.

Current Want: Clarity of Life Purpose (and an Amazon fire stick)

Current Gratitude: all of the amazing people who have walked through my life in the last two months. New friends, old friends, family, colleagues, parents at school, and strangers…all have enveloped me in a cocoon of love and support. I’m so very grateful.

What’s happening with you, right now?

bonus-a trip to the Chicago Bean this weekend!

3 thoughts on “right now…

  1. Ali December 22, 2014 / 2:50 pm

    Love this list & sending you a big hug! Gilmore Girls was a daily dose of goodness for me at a time when I needed it. My current food obsession is dove peppermint bark & I look forward to January when it is all gone. 🙂

  2. misszippy1 December 22, 2014 / 6:21 pm

    Sarah–your amazing strength and character inspire me. Sending you a big hug and saving one for next time I see you in person.

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Tag: writing a novel

Feb 06, 2017
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Back in the Saddle

Back in the Saddle

Good news for anyone who has missed my blog. I’m back! Four months without having to write a post every week was good for my soul.  Time off helped me gain some perspective. Becoming a published author remains the coolest thing I’ve ever done. Five years into the gig, however, the new has worn off. Between writing and the day job, I tend to work all the time, but fame and fortune have eluded me. Poor, pitiful, me… To say nobody reads my stories is untrue and unfair. My books may not fly off the shelf, but they do sell. In fact, any of them have been read by far more people than have read all my academic and professional papers, combined. …

Jan 04, 2016
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on In with the New

In with the New

Last week’s post was (hopefully) the final resting place for some of the baggage I lugged around last year. There’s more, but the load is much lighter than was the case thirty years ago. For this first post of 2016, rather than resolutions, I want to share my priorities for the year. Stay in the moment. Whatever’s happening on Facebook, Twitter, with my email, or with any of the apps on my phone can wait. I need to give my full attention to whatever I’m doing, whether watching television, working on blog posts, or adding to my work in progress. Worrying about what’s yet to come or things that have already happened is also a time-waster. Just stop! Take care of business. I keep …

Mar 16, 2015
By Michael Rupured

About Whippersnapper

Figuring out who I am as a writer has been an ongoing process. Rather than selling out, trying to write a different kind of story has freed me from self-imposed constraints. The result is a story far more “me” than any of my previous novels have been. Opinions about which is the best story vary, but technically speaking, each of my novels has been better than the one before. Whippersnapper is the best yet, and more fun than a barrel of monkeys. If people enjoy the reading half as much as I’ve enjoyed the writing, I might just have a hit on my hands. As always, the story is told from multiple points of view. This time, all three characters …

Feb 02, 2015
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Pantsing Magic

Pantsing Magic

Plotters plan out everything about a story ahead of time. Pantsers make up the story as they go along. My writing process has been different for each of my novels, but I fall squarely on the pantsing side of the continuum. I drift toward plotting now and then, but no matter how hard I try, my books never turn out as planned. I shouldn’t be surprised. Something always knocks my plans for the future off course. Shit happens. Unexpected opportunities arise. Nothing in my life has ever turned out the way I thought it would. Why should my novels be any different? Writing my first novel was like driving for the first time with no idea where I was going. Operating the vehicle was a challenge. …

Sep 29, 2014
By Michael Rupured

Taking the Bull by the Horns

Novels are an author’s bread and butter. Yet, for most of this year, I’ve made little to no progress on a trilogy based loosely on certain events from my life. Other commitments have been part of the problem, but the bigger issue has been my inability to separate fact from fiction. Writing pure fiction is a process of adding to a blank slate to define characters, set the scene, and advance the plot. Inspiration may come from many sources, but the events and characters are made up. Add more details, throw in plot twists, rearrange a few things, perhaps cut a bit here and there, and voila, a novel. Basing a story on something that really happened, whether an historical event like the Stonewall Uprising …

Sep 15, 2014
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on Ready for Some Strange

Ready for Some Strange

Coming up with an idea for my next novel has never been a problem. By the time I finished writing Until Thanksgiving, most of After Christmas Eve had already come together in my head. Once I started writing that story, I knew several of the characters would turn up at the Stonewall Riots for Happy Independence Day. I’ve got ideas for lots more Holiday Tales, but right now, I want to try something different. I love Philip Potter and his friends. But after writing the third novel in the series, I’m ready for some strange. My first thought was a trilogy loosely based on the memoir that prompted me in 2010 to join the Athens Writers Workshop. The memoir, in its current …

Sep 16, 2013
By Michael Rupured

Two at Once

For me, writing a novel is a lot like a relationship. Managing more than one at a time is just too complicated for my simple mind. Yet, despite my usual single-mindedness of purpose, I’m currently working on two novels. After writing the first two books in the holiday series, I wanted to try something different. Adventures in Trauma Car is a first-person coming-of-age story very loosely based on my life. Figuring I knew the story well enough not to need an outline or character sketches, I forged ahead. But 30,000 words in, I hit a wall. I’d changed things up so much that any resemblance to my life had disappeared. I hit this wall with every book I write. The story …

Dec 23, 2012
By Michael Rupured

Joining a Writers Group

The start of another year is like Christmas for the resolution industry. The gym will be crowded and meetings at Weight Watchers will be standing room only. January is also when we see a big influx of new members in our local writers group. Seems there are lots of aspiring writers out there. Some have maybe only thought about writing a book. Others have finished works that keep getting rejected. They want to know if I did something they didn’t do that made a difference. That’s not what they say, of course, but that’s what they really want to know. Quite a few successful writers–far more knowledgable and experienced than I–have written books about how to write a novel and/or …

Nov 27, 2012
By Michael Rupured
Comments Off on The Devil is in the Details

The Devil is in the Details

Over the weekend, I finally finished writing After Christmas Eve. Finding time to write had been the biggest obstacle–never mind that I had loose ends all over the place and no earthly idea how to tie them all together. I had time to write this weekend and along the way, figured out how to end the book. Hallelujah! I sent the draft to my beta readers for general feedback, two technical consultants to look at specific things, and some of the folks in my writers group. At this point, I just needed to know if everything makes sense and fits the characters. And with my technical consultants, I want to make sure details about guns and explosives are correct, as well …

Nov 04, 2012
By Michael Rupured

How to Write a Novel

If you ask me, there are two basic ways to write a novel. You can either make it up as you go along–a style known as pantsing, as in flying by the seat of one’s pants. Or you can plan the story out from start to finish and then start writing. No doubt there are endless permutations and combinations of these two approaches. The essential difference is you either make it up as you go along or plan it out ahead of time. Or at least, that’s what I thought. Seems maybe I was half right. I’ve done it both ways, pantsing my way through Until Thanksgiving and outlining my second novel. Having just about finished After Christmas Eve, I’ve been …


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Saturday, April 28, 2007

Annals of Putin's Wealthy Russia: The Disabled Starve Themselves

The Moscow Times reports yet more information dispelling the ridiculous notion that Russians are prospering under Dictator Putin:

KISELYOVSK, Kemerovo Region -- In a cramped, two-room apartment here, six people with work-related disabilities on Thursday entered the 60th day of a hunger strike over prescription medicine subsidies and pensions.

"We want the laws to work in this country. We want to be able to go to the pharmacy and get our medicine as the law provides," said Alexander Gartman, the protest organizer and a participant.

"The hunger strike is our last chance. The authorities have turned their backs on us, and our appeals and complaints have fallen on deaf ears. Now we're prepared to go all the way," said Gartman, the head of Regressnik, a regional nongovernmental organization that serves the needs of people disabled on the job.

The emaciated protesters lie on mattresses on the floor of Gartman's apartment. On the 42nd day of the hunger strike, doctors told the protesters that if they continued, their bodies would suffer irreparable damage and they would eventually die. "We had no choice but to start taking in a minimal amount of nourishment from sugar water, juice and herbal tea to stay alive," Gartman said.

Other disabled workers come to the apartment every day to offer their support. Many of them are prevented by health problems from taking part.

"If I were to join the hunger strike, my only act of protest would be to die," said Alexander Uskov, a diabetic, who was visiting the apartment earlier this week.

As Uskov was speaking, Gartman sent home an elderly couple, Nikolai Pulyayev and his wife Valentina, who had also come to show their support. "Nikolai would like to join us, but he has a serious stomach ailment that doesn't allow him to," Gartman said.

At issue in the hunger strike are reductions in disabled workers' benefits that have made it next to impossible for the workers to pay for vital prescription drugs.

In May 2006, the government decided to compensate disabled workers only for Russian medicines. Previously, they had been reimbursed in full for all prescribed medicines. The government issued a list of medicines included in the program and the amount it would pay in compensation.

Doctors often prescribe foreign-made medicines, however, leaving disabled workers to pay the sizeable difference out of their own pockets.

"If the prescribed medicine is imported, payment covers only the cost of the Russian-made equivalent," said Irina Kadetova, director of the regional branch of the state Social Insurance Fund.

Even the prices the government sets on domestic medicines lag well behind actual retail prices.

The protesters have appealed to authorities all the way to Moscow, but so far with no success. After two months without food, they aren't sure they will live to see their concerns addressed.

Over two months, medical personnel have responded to three calls from the apartment, and a number of protesters have been forced to quit because of failing health. Sergei Geiger was hospitalized after 20 days with stomach trouble. Nikolai Kuchmar was also forced to drop out after developing intestinal complications. Geiger and Kuchmar worked for years in a local coal mine.

The other protesters and their supporters have similar stories.

Nikolai Pulyayev worked in a mine for 25 years until he was injured in 1987. He has been fighting ever since to receive the benefits to which he is entitled by law. After 17 years, the government finally classified him as unfit to work, but his benefits are not indexed to inflation. The state pays him 1,700 rubles ($66) per month.

So far, the authorities have done little to respond to the protesters' demands.

Not long ago, a letter arrived from Mikhail Mironov, head of the department that handles citizens' appeals in the administration of President Vladimir Putin. In the letter, Gartman said, Mironov directed Kemerovo Governor Aman Tuleyev to deal with the hunger strikers' demands.

In response, Deputy Governor Yevgeny Baranov told the protesters that none of their demands fell within the purview of the regional government.

Last Friday, the protesters received a second letter from Mironov, in which he renewed his request for Tuleyev to sit down and talk with Gartman and the others. The governor's office has responded with silence.

Such indifference is the best the hunger strikers have received from the authorities.

In the first few days, Kiselyovsk police tried to disrupt the protest. "Some officers entered the apartment when one of us opened to door to go outside. They made no attempt to conceal their intention to use force against us," said hunger striker Vladimir Korovkin.

"The officers grabbed Vasily Kisel, a diabetic, by the legs and hair and started dragging him toward the door," Korovkin said. "He nearly passed out. The frightened cops called for an ambulance."

A dozen policemen also sealed off the apartment and discouraged supporters from entering by demanding ID and making threats. The protesters filmed the harassment.

"Police personnel did in fact exceed their authority," said Kiselyovsk's chief prosecutor, Alexander Zharikov.

After looking into the matter, Zharikov sent legal opinions to this effect to Lieutenant General Anatoly Vinogradov, the regional police chief, and to Kiselyovsk Mayor Sergei Lavrentyev.

"They're exacerbating the situation when these issues could be solved peacefully," Zharikov said.

As fate would have it, during the third week of the hunger strike, Lavrentyev was given an award for defending human rights by the regional human rights ombudsman, Nikolai Volkov.

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Coming off Depakote

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October 28, 2019 | 34 Comments

  1. Fantastic story, well done

    One of my lingering effects of Seroxat, is head noise, too..

    Its like an electrical fault, buzzing away, but, the worst are the ‘head explosions’, always at night.

    The zaps went on for years and years, but sometimes now I get a run of small explosions in my head. Imagine a hand-grenade or a fire-work, in your head.. Pow Pow Pow

    A few months ago, I had a monster explosion in my head. It was so colossal, my head lifted off the pillow. I used to have body-type seizures, cold-turkey from Seroxat. My body would lift off the bed. It was quick and sudden and gone in no-time.

    But, this head thing is something else.
    It is not tinnitus, which is a ringing in the ears.

    This feels like it is deep under the skull.

    • Hi Annie can relate with what you wrote I had zaps for years to very frightening like you said seizure type episodes after seroxat. I also developed intrusive thoughts and images that I’d never had when I came off did you get anything like that. Never had ocd before

      • Hi Karl

        It is extremely difficult to recover from the insane amount of withdrawal effects we were bombarded with from Seroxat. The absurd pil leaflet, the absurd guidelines, don’t cover it.
        Trying to come out of all that, is very hard to divorce real from unreality.

        It is a very gradual process.

        Weird thoughts were intrusive, how could they not be..

        I knew my thoughts were distorted, and the only way I could combat this, was to do my best to act and think normally.

        I started a gardening business, there was no way I was going to go down the benefits and disability routes, that would have hindered me even more. I am very independent.

        Doing hours and hours of weeding in the freezing cold, took the edge off, plus having to home educate my child and walk the labrador for hours – it was really hard, but, I think it helped to disentangle the distortion back to some sort of reality.

        There is still a level of shock in my system, that will probably be permanent.

        No one can fully estimate the power this drug had to alter all sane thought and behaviour, and I appreciate you wanting to talk about it.

        It is not something we just get-over, and move on..
        Much too life-altering.

        • Hi Annie that’s very kind off you to get back to me thankyou I had a permanent job for 11 years untill I stopped Seroxat which I had to leave because I was sleeping two hours a night for 18 months. I didn’t claim benefits in this time wish I had off but was to unwell to do anything lived off my savings. Luckily I found someone who took me on a couple off days a week gardening which is all I could manage which I’ve done upto now not the career path I’d have chosen but being an outdoor person didn’t mind this has helped. I also have developed fibromyalgia since quitting and have been left with intrusive thoughts and images I never had. Im self employed now don’t earn loads but far more than if I was on the sick I work a couple off days a week sometimes and some weeks I might work everyday depending on how much work I have or how I’m feeling. Been doing this four years and gradually built it up to be honest if it wasnt for the fact I have kept busy don’t know i would have survived withdrawal and often feel worse on the days I’m off symptomatic which is a shame because I can never really relax I have the odd good day . I find the winter worse since withdrawal and this fibro crap I’ve developed. I was on seroxat 13 years taken nothing now for seven years absolute hell for years coming off never got back to baseline but like you by the sounds off it do my best. I also work outdoors in freezing weather every month off the year even when the fibro makes my legs in the cold feel like there full off super glue I try to never give up think people who have been through this are true warriors thankyou for replying it’s good to be able to relate with others Karl 🙂

    • I am going through a demand to not go off Divalproex. 250mg .i am being refused as to how to safely end this horror. , Phys. demands I stay on until out 15th meeting. I disagree and want to stop now..

    • Can you go into detail on this comment ?
      “I’m almost inclined to think stressing the system and then pulling it back (giving smidge more drug) actually may help.”
      This is interesting I’m going nthrough a similar situation but I haven’t been on the drug very long so it should likely be easier.
      *- Having alot of knowledge on this would a wean using the extended release be a better idea ? I have access to direct and extended. Your perspective paragraph was the most interesting , thanks.

    • I have been off of Depakote for over a year and am still experiencing the brain zaps at night and when I wake up. I am so frustrated at every psychiatrist for saying I have no idea what you are experiencing. I am now 30 years old living a great life now with brain zaps. I have tried vitamin B and omega 3 fatty acids just for temporary relief. When will these go away? It’s so frustrating. I’m starting to think I need serotonin supplements. What sort of doctor should I see instead of a Psychiatrist?

  2. This post and others like it are invaluable for reference when helping people decide whether, when, and how to taper.

    “But so important is the underlying stability of the person being healed. We in most cases are fragile people who have experienced trauma in many ways and psychological preparedness for the stress of this needs to be established before trying to taper.”

    That whole section is excellent.

    I’d like to encourage any who are interested, perhaps especially people already working in a peer support capacity, to check out GAM, a method developed in Quebec that empowers service users to assess their overall quality of life, the role of medications in either enhancing or detracting, and to prepare for tapering if that is what they desire.
    The workbook I’m currently using in a Recovery Center setting is here:

    RxISK and David Healy are mentioned in a section on a patient’s rights for information on medication:

    “Access to information on prescribed medications is often a basic need for
    medication users. Access to the most comprehensive and objective information
    about drug treatment, its benefits and risks, and the various alternative or
    complementary therapeutic options available is a right for people who are
    prescribed medicines, psychotropic or otherwise… doctors do not always
    have the time to provide all the necessary information on the medications
    they prescribe. It is therefore important that mental health providers who
    advise medication users ensure that they receive and understand the available
    information on the drugs prescribed, their instructions for use, desired effects
    and side effects, drug interactions, and different treatment options, if so desired.
    There are several sources of information on psychotropic drugs, including
    pharmacists, reference books such as the Compendium of Pharmaceuticals
    and Specialties, the Guide critique des médicaments de l’âme (Critical Guide
    of Psychiatric Medication; Cohen et al, 1995), Psychiatric Drugs Explained
    (Healy, 2008)* courses on psychiatric medication, and the Internet**. This
    information can also be conveyed by different means: during individual
    follow-up meetings, through workshops on medications, or by way of posters
    displayed in organizations or establishments.

    * Sources of information regarding psychiatric medication must be reliable and varied in order to get a full picture. User accounts, information from a critical perspective, along with more mainstream sources, are all useful.
    ** As an example, the Web site and the tab “RxRisk Papers” can be consulted as an introduction to the general information and issues surrounding the different classes of psychiatric medication.”

    From what I have read, GAM is used primarily in Canada, and there are some projects in Spain and Brazil. The language is less polarizing than a lot of what is typically seen in prescribed harm circles and has enough backing in Quebec as to be accepted in more mainstream settings.

  3. NHS bill for US drugs ‘could soar under post-Brexit trade deal’
    Dispatches investigation finds ‘drug pricing’ has been discussed in six initial meetings between trade officials from the UK and US.

    By Paul Gallagher
    Monday, 28th October 2019, 11:22 am
    22 hours ago

    The price the NHS pays for US medicines could soar under a trade deal with the United States after the UK leaves the European Union, according to an investigation.

    Despite Boris Johnson’s assertion that the NHS is not on the table, sources with knowledge of the initial trade discussions between the two countries question whether the Prime Minister is able to keep to that promise. In fact “drug pricing” has been discussed in six initial meetings between trade officials from the two countries and secret meetings between US drugs firms and British civil servants where medicine “price caps” have been talked about, according to Dispatches.
    The programme, broadcast on Channel 4 on Monday night, was also told that British trade officials have been warned that the subject is so sensitive that they must not mention “drug pricing” in emails but use the term “valuing innovation”.
    NHS staff and health campaigners fear the US government and its powerful pharmaceutical industry want the health service to pay more for their drugs, which are much more expensive in the US. Currently, the UK can block American drugs not deemed “value for money” and allow cheaper alternatives to be prescribed to patients which save the NHS hundreds of millions of pounds a year. However, the system could be under threat under a new transatlantic trade deal.

    According to research carried out for the programme, the cost to the UK government could be approximately £27bn, wiping out the potential Brexit bonus for the NHS promised by Mr Johnson. In an interview with the programme, one of Donald Trump’s former top trade negotiators Stephen Vaughn said he does not understand what Mr Johnson means when he says the “NHS is not on the table
    Stephen Vaughn, former general counsel for the Office of the US Trade Representative, said: “That that really goes to the question of what the UK government means when it says the NHS is off the table. I don’t know what they thought they meant when they said that. “
    Until April this year, Mr Vaughn was the top lawyer in the Office of the US Trade Representative and a key player in recent trade deals with Canada, Mexico and South Korea which saw the US win key concessions over the price those countries paid for US medicines.
    Mr Vaughn said: “I would expect US negotiators to see what we could do in terms of getting increased access to the British market. That’s what we do… I think it’s going to be likely to come up because the US mentioned pharmaceuticals in its negotiating objectives”

    The programme focuses on the drug Humira, used to treat 46,000 patients in the UK who suffer from diseases like rheumatoid arthritis and Crohn’s disease, made by US drugs company AbbVie. It is the single most expensive drug for the NHS costing £450m a year. Last year, the NHS started prescribing cheaper alternatives to Humira that will save the health service £150m a year.

    Cheap alternatives
    Unlike in the UK, patients in the US will not be allowed to be prescribed cheaper alternatives to Humira until 2023. Trade experts fear that should a trade deal be signed with America, then the US administration will force Britain to adopt similar policies.

    Dr Andrew Hill, from Liverpool University, estimates that adopting the US system of drug pricing could cost the NHS £2.9bn alone for Humira. He also calculates that if the US government and drug firms get their way in trade negotiations, the total extra cost to the UK could be £27bn.

    Matt Hancock has said “the NHS is not for sale” and that the health service would not be on the table in any future trade talks. The Health Secretary was responding to comments by the US Ambassador that freer access to the NHS will be part of any post-Brexit US-UK trade deal. Woody Johnson – a member of the Johnson & Johnson pharmaceutical family – said that healthcare – along with “all things that are traded” – would be on the table in negotiations for a deal.

    A no deal Brexit would have devastating consequences for medical supplies in the UK, experts have warned. It could lead to a shortage of some drugs, which might not have the required regulatory approval by the end of January 2020 to continue being brought in from the EU, or price rises in the event of drugs needing to go through a new licensing process. If the UK leaves with a deal any disruption will be lessened.

    A spokesperson for the Department for International Trade said: “The NHS is not, and never will be, for sale to the private sector, whether overseas or domestic… The sustainability of the NHS is an absolute priority for the government. We could not agree to any proposals on medicines pricing or access that would put NHS finances at risk or reduce clinician and patient choice.”

    Boris JohnsonBrexitMatt HancockNHSTrade DealUnited

    Couple that with this and as useless as the MHRA and other regulators have been, and that EMA are flagging up that they won’t be able to do a proper job in future – anybody using drugs is even more so pharmas’ rich pickings. With collusion of medics.( Johnson and Johnson are involved always a marker to note)
    Britain’s leading role in evaluating new medicines for sale to patients across the EU has collapsed with no more work coming from Europe because of Brexit, it has emerged.

    The decision by the European Medicines Agency to cut Britain out of its contracts seven months ahead of Brexit is a devastating blow to British pharmaceutical companies already reeling from the loss of the EMA’s HQ in London and with it 900 jobs.

    All drugs sold in Europe have to go through a lengthy EMA authorisation process before use by health services, and the Medicines & Healthcare products Regulatory Agency (MHRA) in Britain has built up a leading role in this work, with 20-30% of all assessments in the EU.

    The MHRA won just two contracts this year and the EMA said that that work was now off limits. “We couldn’t even allocate the work now for new drugs because the expert has to be available throughout the evaluation period and sometimes that can take a year,” said a spokeswoman.

    In a devastating second blow, existing contracts with the MHRA are also being reallocated to bloc members.

    Martin McKee, the professor of European health at the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, who has given evidence to select committees about Brexit, said it was a disaster for the MHRA, which had about £14m a year from the EMA.

    The head of the Association of British Pharmaceutical Industry said it was akin to watching a “British success story” being broken up.

    Mike Thompson, the chief executive of the association, said: “Clearly we’ve all been incredibly proud of the MHRA’s role over the last few years. They’d established themselves as one of the most respected regulators across all of Europe and industry. It’s been a British success story.”

    The EMA said that because of the long lead-time involved in assessing medicines it could no longer award the lead contracts to British people since there was no guarantee they would be part of the EU after March 2019.

    It is understood the MHRA bid for 36 EMA contracts this year but were only awarded two, and these were for drugs for which evaluation had already begun.

    The situation is a stark contrast to 2016 when the UK was the lead assessor, known as the rapporteur, on 22 applications, and was joint lead or co-rapporteur on 19 multinational applications. This made it the number one in Europe, with Germany’s regulator behind with 22 lead contracts but only 12 co-contracts.

    European Medicines Agency applications for medicines marketing approval.
    European Medicines Agency applications for medicines marketing approval. Photograph: EMA/European Medicines Agency
    The EMA now also requires all existing drugs assessors to transfer their personal knowledge of their specialist fields to counterparts in a European member state.

    Sign up to our Brexit weekly briefing
    Read more
    “You might have been working on a cancer drug for decades and built up so much expertise and you are the absolute specialist in your field and now have to transfer all your knowledge to someone else. It must be like handing over your baby,” said one source in the EMA.

    Thompson suggested the removal of the MHRA from the approvals system was the EU’s loss. The MHRA did one-third of all the manufacturing inspections and in terms of patient safety they had picked up one third of all “adverse events”. He said: “This is a pre-eminent regulator. As part of the withdrawal agreement the UK regulator … they will just be an observer in that system.”

    McKee said: “The MHRA has benefited enormously from its close links with the EMA. The fracturing of those links will impact severely. on its budget, much now from the EMA, and its ability to attract and retain skilled staff.”

    The loss of these valuable specialist contracts underlines the punishing impact Brexit is having on services that supports the pharma industry in Britain.

    The EMA has already started its move from Britain to its new headquarters in Amsterdam. It employs 900 staff in its Canary Wharf offices, in London, and 84 have already relocated to the Dutch capital, the EMA said. It expected that about 300 of its staff would be unable to relocate and have to find new jobs because of Brexit.

    The ABPI said the change in approvals meant a huge cost to the medicines companies.

    Thompson said: “Companies are having to build extra laboratories to try to prepare to batch-release medicines made in the UK on the continent. That’s a huge cost for us. Hundreds of millions of pounds that we’re having to spend that frankly we’d rather spend on researching new medicines. We have no choice because we have to ensure what we do is legal. It’s probably wasted money in the end.

    “We regret that, because the MHRA is a highly respected agency. We’d hope that could be resolved as soon as possible. Ultimately it will be difficult for them to hang on to the capability that they have spent many years building up.”

    The MHRA said it hoped its relationship with the EMA could be salvaged in negotiations.

    An MHRA statement said: “We want to retain a close working partnership with the EU to ensure patients continue to have timely access to safe medicines and medical devices. This involves us making sure our regulators continue to work together, as they do with regulators internationally, and we would like to explore with the EU the terms on which the UK could continue to participate in the EMA.”

  4. So eloquently stated:

    We in most cases are fragile people who have experienced trauma in many ways and psychological preparedness for the stress of this needs to be established before trying to taper. It’s monumentally hard. Internal and external resources are so important in the way of supportive family, friends, work, professionally – psychiatrist, psychologists, therapists.

    Sadly, many are left in the lurch, especially, when no one appreciates or fully comprehends, ones dilemma. Many are ‘walking wounded’ and sadly once harmed, are no longer willing to TRUST! If all the healing professions and people who are prescribed these medicines, were to come to RXISK and utilise it as an educational resource, many would take heed and have a totally different perspective of how we perceive medicines and procedures.

    We are generally told to ‘trust’ and conform to – and not challenge or question.

  5. Thank you for this info. and your willingness to share it with others. We must be proactive in our health care. My son has been on Depakote with unfavorable results, even at a low dosage. I was doing a search to see how to wean him off of it because he wanted to just stop taking it. He has been on it a month. I recently found out about a DNA test (done by a mouth swab) called Gene Sight (? Spelling) that tells you which classes of meds would be the best for each individual. It gives you a red level which means you definitely should not take any meds in that class of meds, a yellow level which may or may not work for you, and a green level which will work for your benefit. The psychiatrist we “were” seeing used this test on others but didn’t mention it to either of us. I have been on so many antidepressants and was told I about exhausted them all, but never offered this test. I encourage you to look it up. We are looking forward to the results. I’m told the test has been out for 2-3 years.

  6. Thank you – I’ve only been on Depakote for about a month and am already having bowel/stomach issues because I’m taking an aspirin regimen (for 1 bout of Paroximal Afib)….I’m already done with this drug and will wean off ASAP….lived most of my life anti-depressant free…things were tough some times, but things are tough for EVERYONE sometimes…diet, exercise and competent talk therapy are my direction, now (again, actually) — Thank you, again —-

  7. Hello

    My 12 year daughter been on depakote for almost 3 weeks and its a nightmare, she just said shes hearing a loud whistle in her mind and funny laughs, scares me like hell, how i can detox her, shes been diagnose with petit mal im going on natural ways, i dont want to drug my baby

  8. Hello!

    This is Angie from Cairo, Egypt. First of all, thank you so much for sharing this with us. It’s quite helpful as I am currently withdrawing depakine too. Second, here is my story. I was diagnosed with MS 20 years ago and have been on depakine ever since then as I had few seizures episodes early on. However, some doctors doubt it, and they think it could possibly be psychological, in principle which turns out to be the case. After all, it’s totally normal for someone to get seizures especially if their childhood is not the best. So, as a philosopher, a naturalist in deed, I am now taking good care of my health ( nutrition and workout) while withdrawing depakine. I feel so much better now. I take keppra as a substitute but that will be for a short while until I quit it, too.

    So, you are not alone. Getting the right diagnosis isn’t an easy task. For me, my parents are doctors and professors as well. But they used to believe in the power of MRIs and all that. For me, empiricism fails big time because we are more than the physiological problem or whatever that is. Let me share with you this; honey and herbs helped alot with my symptoms-unconventional medicine they call it. But it’s worth it!

    I am a writer, and will be publishing a story on that next week. I want to raise awareness on that issue, and my motivation rests on that emotional hell I have been through because of depakine! It is a killer.

  9. Thank you for this.
    Did you have to change from Depakote extended release to direct release to taper please, I have and want to taper as my shaking is terrible after being on these meds for 14 years,. I am on 500mg of extended release so therefore it would be a jump of 250mg to the lower dose.
    Kind regards.

    • l had been taking Depakote for migraines for 23 years l know do not have migraines but my body is totally hooked on Depakote (l was never told by my head pain doctor that Depakote was addictive)l had zero support from my doctor just said take half the dose for a week then quit! Luckily l read everything l could on line about tapering of the drug, and my regular Doctor has backed me. This is where l am at the moment, six months a go l started stepping down the dose from 500mg to 250 mg delayed release, l was not able to find a direct release Depakote pill. I kept cutting the 250 pill in half untill the side affects lessened then went to the 125 mg pill, l hailed it and then Quartered it, you have to get a really sharp pill cutter. Each time l cut down the 125 mg pill the side affects got wors because your body is going into drug starvation mode. It’s been hell but l will not give up, l spend half the day in a fog like state l feel like curling up in bed, but l fight that feeling and it is a fight. So right now l take 31.5 mg per day l can not cut the pill any smaller so my plan is to take 31.5mg every other day untill l can finally quit. I hope this has been of some help, good luck.

  10. Hi I was on olanzapine for year and half for anxiety tapered down 6 months and been off it 5 months still have nausea in mornings and no appetite my son said to go on depakote for gaba cause it worked for him he’s been on it 9 years now taking cbd capsules good for anxiety but got to get rid of this nausea I have no life

  11. I have awful pain in my ankles, ontop of my other chronic illnesses (constant vertigo) that makes being active awfully hard. I’m trying to figure out if the pain will ever go away? I was only on depakote a month & been off it about a month now.

  12. I have searched far and wide for information on this very topic and unfortunately there is little on it. I am thankful for this post. I decided recently to taper and eventually quit depakote. My sister who has worked in elder care for many years has seen the detrimental effects of long term depakote in elderly. And I am appalled at how Abbot Labs, maker of depakote, falsely claimed the off label use of this drug to doctors. I was put on it 2 years ago by a psych during a difficult period in my marriage that I thought was ending in divorce. I had no choice because I was in the hospital and they told me that I had to take it or be forced to remain there for 30 days while they went to the court to get an order. if I said yes the. I could go home in 72 hours. It was obvious what I chose! I have been afraid to get off of it because of the withdrawals but I am going to do it gradually, even if it take the whole year.

    • Hello April .
      The same happened to my son.
      I wish you success with the withdrawals , having a rough time with withdrawal symptoms with my son , terrible noises and voices in the head and no sleep , doctors are useless the don’t want to know , just want you to take the poison and vegetate.

  13. I’ve been on a different cocktail of Antidepressants and anti anxiety medications since 2006, here I am 2021 and still depressed and have anxiety. I believe the doctors believe I’m full of it. My family could sure tell them different. I’m sick if taking medications, especially when they don’t help and the side effects suck. I believe I have side effects from each one I’m on now. I’m on 300mg Wellbutrin, 1000mg Depakote, 20 mg Prozac and .5 mg Xanax times 3 per day.

    • Hello Tabetha. Your situations sounds strikingly like my daughter’s. She too has been on different cocktails and for many years and is still depressed and anxious. She has been suffering non stop since last May and although the doctors keep changing her meds she has not improved. At the moment she too is taking 1000mg Depakote, 15 mg Brextill (a new antidepressant) and 2,5 mg Seroquel. Have you considered coming off your meds? If doctors keep changing the meds how do you know what is a side effect or a withdrawal symptom or a relapse? It has been hard on all of us in the family. I hope you are doing better. It would be good to hear about your progress. Thank you Anna

  14. I can’t concentrate enough to type all that I think. I went the med route all through child to mod 20s became terminally ill weaned off drugs to reduce toxins took 2 years plus all the symptoms. Researched natural methods by far my most successful therapy was purified water with active chlorine dioxide to assist in detox. Mental clarity bad cholesterol levels lowered stress reduced or my bodies response was less overload. Skip 19 years a tragedy losing my son triggered me and I’ve spiraled unable to naturally suppressed cope with this sought medical help and yes the drugs are back and the Dr never acknowledged me or my life just my old diagnosis BP and just tossed me Gabapentin and hydroxyzine. Then Neurologist added Depakote saw me for like 1 minute. Side-effects landed me in ER and suicide watch and increased meds under supervision. Side-effects got worse removed me off Gabapentin finally 5 months to feel not suicidal but still have a day or 2 a month. Depakote 1000mg now and had a psych episode and disassociate episode almost got hit by id say vehicle as I was found in the middle of the highway. Head was burning explosive feeling and rage. I think I stopped my Depakote for at least 5 days not on purpose just having lost time episodes. Memory issues. No seizures that I am aware of but scared now to start taking again. Will this be worse or improve and IM unable to contact my Psych. As everyone is remote nowadays and u call a call center its horrible to stay panicked. I am saving this site to read later when I can. But a natural approach is what I am searching. I have to get off these meds. Peace to all

  15. I am bipolar.
    I have tried everything with side effects that lead to having to stop except Depacote. I have been put up to 1000mg over a year. My hair has fallen out to point that I can’t even recognize myself.
    My weight is 203 lbs. So losing weight is hard even though I was 200 something when I began depacote. I have uncontrollable tremors and jerks along with nightmare dreams. I have no sex drive at all. I have had a decrease in my vision by 2 fold. My eye prescription has changed twice in one year. I have had broken bones.

    • My highest dose was 2500mg. I didn’t even know how dangerous this was until my pharmacist showed concern for me. I fired the psychiatrist I was seeing and asked my GP for another one. My new psychiatrist helped me over the past two years to taper off, 125mg at a time, once per month. In finally in the final month, but we are doing 125mg decreases once per week now. From 500 to 0 in four weeks…. He is retiring so we needed to speed things up. It has been tough.

      The hair loss has stopped but it got so bad. I blamed trauma for the hair loss until someone showed me a list of side effects from this drug. I wish I never started on it. Worst part? I don’t have bipolar 2 at all. I just got a diagnosis of ADHD-C and C-PTSD. I had to fight for the proper testing to sort this out.

      I’m nervous about what the next couple weeks will bring. I just decreased to 250mg tonight.

  16. Thank you for this post! I’ve been on depakote for 3 years. I’m at 2000 mg a day and the side effects are just unbearable. Stomach issues, weight gain, severe headaches, tingling and itching, hair loss, vision problems,really too much to list. I’ve tried to stop cold turkey and that almost drove me to the breaking point. My psychiatrist doesn’t want to switch meds because he believes that it’s working too well for me. But this medication is scaring me more and more. It’s definitely time for a change and this post reassured me of that. I wish that doctors would listen more and understand how these medications affect us. Yes my mood has been stable, but my body feels like it’s being destroyed in the process. Thank you again for this. I’m glad that I’m not alone.

  17. I’m always interested in other peoples’ perspectives on medications, and reactions. I’ve only been on Depakote for 3 months, on my starting dosage, and tappered off after a week and a half to two weeks. I’ve been noticing a headache that comes and goes, but is progressively getting worse, as well as vision that is strange, thats the best way I can put it. I’ve also been sensitive to sunlight lately. I decided to get off of Depakote due to weight gain, edemas in my ankles to the point I look like I’ve been stung in both feet by large aggressive wasps, hair loss, and to switch provides since my psychiatrist tells me nothing when I ask about side effects, or anything to watch out for. I’m currently trying to find a provider that has better hours then 8am-4pm. This is the worst provider i’ve had to deal with. There’s only one person who answers the phone all day, and you never get connected to them, so they call you back hours later. If you can’t get this call on time, or can’t have your phone at work with you, you’re screwed and have to start the process over, again and again, and half the time you just deal with whatever is bothering you until your next appointment. Now, I’m taking Lamotrigine, and I hope it goes better then Depakote. I’ve only been being treated for Bipolar for a few months, so these classifications of drugs are going to take some getting use to. before this I was on Paxil, Lexapro, and Cymbalta, which was treating anxiety and depression. Paxil was a living nightmare, it worked, the symptoms got worse as I took the medication. At one point, I had lucid, strange, nightmares. I also felt like I had electricity running though my veins, bugs crawling on me, ringing in the ears, headaches, and my arms and legs would flail in the middle of the night stratling and waking me up. Best of luck to any out this trying to figure out how to live a “normal” life, it’s tough.

  18. I have been taking Depakote ER (500 mg per night) for about 4 months to help me sleep at night and to relax my stressed muscles. I knew I only needed this for a period in my life, and now I want to get off of it entirely. It definitely helped calm my muscles at night and helped me sleep well, but I prefer to not take medications for long periods if possible. With the help of my PCP, I began tapering off from 500 to 250 (for 2 weeks) down to 125 (for 2 weeks), and then eventually off 2 weeks later. I have started developing pins and needles all over my body at random times (especially in the feet and legs). Its so odd and it is hit and miss, but it feels like numbness just beneath the skin. I even began to wonder if I may have MS (as my dad had it) or some other nerve damage. I believe now that it is withdrawal symptoms to the Depakote ER because of when the symptoms began. I will consult my doctor and seek more professional opinions, but I do believe that is what I am experiencing. I hope this helps if anyone else is dealing with these symptoms when tapering off of this drug.

  19. It is very comforting to find this site where similar experiences are reported. I hope that they can be read by those responsible who put patients through such misery.
    My experience with lithium was relatively good (though too long and too high–41 yrs.. But I had to stop as I became “alergic” to it and my kidneys were affected. Since then, I had terrible times as my GP dr. retired just when I needed someone to taper me off lithium. I had to do it myself and could not find a medical soul what with the pandemic starting. Hypomania or possibly withdrawal put me at a year’s w/d of insomnia and hyperactivity which must have been hypomania. Ironically, the help that I did get via an authoritative hospital with a historically bad reputation during the 60s, made things worse. I was put on divalproex sodium, and being diabetic it did a lot of harm and the psychs. would not let me off it. I had to discontinue my association with the hospital to stop the drug after 6 months of torture. And now, I am withdrawing. My perception, is that few doctors have the gall to make individual decisions based on the patient’s case, and only make them on the base of bureaucratic guidelines. In my case, I have often woken up slowly getting better, only to regret that I woke up at all.

  20. Hey guys reading all of these comments brings great relief.
    I was on depakote 500mg twice a day for two months and I went cold turkey.
    I feel like I’m losing my mind. The withdrawls have been coming in waves. I’ve been having withdrawls for 1 month and 1 weeks and im losing my patience.

    The first week of withdrawls was really heavy, I would apart crying for no reason and I would cry uncomfortably.

    Some days I feel like I can conquer the world and other days I feel so weak and vulnerable. The depression that comes from my wothdrawls is so deep that it scares me into thinking that I’ll feel like this for the rest of my life. I feel so hopeless. I try to constantly remind myself that I’m only going through withdrawls and they will not be there for ever but it gets hard when I get sucked in so deep from the depression. The anxiety is also pretty heavy. The weakness also comes and goes in waves. Some days I can hit the gym really hard and I feel so accomplished and other days it’s ridiculously hard to even convince myself to go to the gym.

    My withdrawls have been diminishing as the weeks go by but sometimes there’s a hard peak that comes along.

    I wish there was a definitive date that the withdrawls came to an end but from here it’s literally a waiting game.

    No matter how hard it gets I will never quit and I always try my best to at least stand up when my withdrawls hit me. I pace around or I stand up and just sit outside for some fresh air.

    At the moment I’m struggling with feeling comfortable with natural boredom. It feels like life isn’t exciting. I feel uncomfortable just being bored or idling. I’m trying to get used to the idea that boredom exists and it’s okay to just sit down and watch a movie, a show, or just be on my phone scrolling through social media.

    I can’t wait for these withdrawls to finally go away. It’s been a roller coaster of uncomfortable emotions.

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Movie Poster

Leap Year (2010)

Leap Year Blu-ray release date was set for August 22, 2010.

 Rating: 3.4/5 (9 users) *New - please help rate it
Rating: PG
imdb: 6.1
Runtime: 100
Theater date

Theater gross
$25.9 mil
Genre(s): Romantic Comedy
Movie Homepage
Trailer trailer

Anna Brady is a well-to-do woman with Irish roots. She loves her boyfriend Jeremy, but he seems reluctant to commit, so she decides that the time has come to force his hand. An Irish legend says that if a woman proposes to her boyfriend on Leap Day, he must accept, so she heads to Ireland for the end of February and plans to meet him in Dublin on February 29th. Her trip takes an unexpected turn due to weather and travel troubles, and she finds herself having to take the rustic route to her destination courtesy of a rugged innkeeper named Declan. Initially, Declan regards her with contempt, but the two of them gradually grow closer, and Anna begins to rethink her engagement to Jeremy.
*The products below contain affiliate links. We may receive a commission for purchases made through these links.
UPC: 025192044205
Release Date March 13, 2011

UPC: 025192044212
Release Date August 22, 2010


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Susan new

Chair: Prof. Susan van Schalkwyk

(Stellenbosch University)

Committee members:

Susan van Schalkwyk (Chair)

Ann George (Secretary)

Ronel Maart

Francois Cillier

vision and mission

The vision of this SIG is to strengthen HPE research nationally with a view to producing scholarly
outputs that are not only relevant for our context, but that also have broader applicability and that seek
to contribute to the body of knowledge in the field. Its mission is to facilitate a network for SAAHE
educators to collaborate with and support each other, to share ideas and advice, to participate in joint
research initiatives, and to offer short courses/workshops/symposia to enhance our own professional
learning and support the development of HPE research in the SAAHE region. A key imperative will be
to build and mentor young researchers in the field.

While South Africa is generally regarded as one of the largest contributors to research production on the African continent, particularly in Sub-Saharan Africa, it is a well-known fact that the country (and indeed the continent) contributes minimally on the global stage. This is also true for HPE research – a situation that is problematic for a number of reasons. Firstly, because it means that the canon that represents what we ‘know’ about HPE is being written by researchers from the US, the UK, Canada, Australia and some part of Europe. Secondly, because this trend makes it that much harder for researchers, particularly young or emerging researchers, to ‘break through’ into international publication. Such publication and dissemination is important if we are to influence the canon or body of knowledge and make it more relevant to a wider range of contexts. Thirdly, because the resultant absence of a publication track record in leading journals becomes a barrier to career progression and to successfully securing funding to conduct the sort of longitudinal, multi-site studies that is preferred by many editors and conference reviewers.

Research in the field of health professions education (HPE) is burgeoning. This growth is seen in the increasing number (and in many cases, stature) of conferences, symposia, networks and journals that create opportunities for dissemination, review and debate. While much of the work being done in the field is characterized by small scale, practice-based studies, there has also been a shift towards emphasizing scholarship, and the importance of conducting studies that lead to more substantive theories and understandings. Leading journals in HPE (or medical education as it is known in many contexts) are looking to publish work that is seen to be both scholarly and rigorous, and that can influence thinking and practice across the world.

In spite of these challenges, there is a great deal of excellent work being done in South Africa. However, often this occurs in silos with little sharing of these emerging ideas, practices and theoretical positions. A SIG that can create a network of SAAHE educators and researchers, could offer an avenue for building and strengthening HPE research in the country.

Reflections on a pandemic_29Sept20.pdf

For any further information contact Prof van Schalkwyk at

plan of action (2022)

Future plans

  • In 2023, conduct a Delphi to set Research priorities for HPE in the region [Susan]
  • Establish an online community: ‘community conversations’; compendium of podcasts’ similar
    to KEYLime [Ann]

To join any of our SIG’s and obtain SAAHE membership, please complete the membership form


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Kindred Tea Time: Beverages

 If we could sit down with you over a cup of tea (or coffee) each week, these are the tools and treasures we’d be excited to share with you. We’ll ask a question, share our answers, then invite you to join and share your own tools and treasures on a teatime break.

What do you love drinking? AKA Favorite beverages!

David's Tea

"Everything from David's Tea!
Lately I've been drinking Just Beet It in the morning and Tulsi Tranquility at night.
I also love their teaware!

GT'S Kombucha & Aqua Kefir

"Seasonal flavors, gut-healthy probiotics, and a hint of sparkling fizz."

Wild Turkey Bourbon

"A little bit of Wild Turkey American Honey bourbon with ginger beer for special occasions."

"Worthy successor of the french press.
Makes smooth coffee and best of all is camping-friendly!

Live Kombucha

 "My go-to brand is Live Kombucha - brewed and bottled in Austin, TX.
Their Root Beer and Ginger flavors taste as good, if not better than the real sodas!

Yeti Rambler Mug with Handle

"I got this mug for Christmas and use it every single day. Keeps my coffee super warm AND has a handle!"

Vacuvin Wine Saver & Vacuum Stoppers

"I love this tool that helps keep your wine fresher for longer periods. It pumps out air from the bottle and allows you to reseal the bottle with the rubber stopper. I can easily open a bottle, seal it with the wine saver and open it 3 days later and it tastes the same."

"Earl Grey Moonlight" by Adagio Teas

"This is the perfect black tea, whether you typically like Earl Greys or not. It’s our “house tea” and you won’t find us without it.
We’ve converted many non-tea-drinkers to BIG fans with this cuppa.

Waco Cha

"@waco_cha when I’m out and about in Waco.
Love their heart & vision for communiTEA as much as their drinks. And, I’m planning a dumpling night with their sister restaurant @waco_bao for our team when our shelter-in-place order is lifted!

"The People’s Brew Basket" by The Republic of Tea

"@republicoftea’s nylon The People’s Brew Basket has long been my favorite personal tea basket perfect for one mug."

David Rio's Tiger Spice Chai

"My favorite blend of chai latte is David Rio - Tiger Spice.
I like to add a little bit of pumpkin spice or gingerbread syrup to give it an extra cozy taste.

Anthropologie Mug

"My favorite mug is this old Anthropologie mug that my best friend got me when I got engaged."

Raspberry Torani Syrup

"My favorite summer treat is an Italian Cream Soda - and I love to add some Raspberry Torani Syrup!"


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Talking Drupal
Talking Drupal is a weekly chat about web design and development by a group a guys with one thing in common, we love Drupal. With hosts Stephen Cross, John Picozzi and Nic Laflin.

In episode #151, we talking about using Drupal as an API

Show Topics

  • What is an API (Application Programming Interface)
  • Why create an API?
  • How to create one (High Level)
  • Security
  • Documentation
  • Routing
  • Testing an api
  • Caching

Stephen Cross - @stephencross

Nic Laflin - @nicxvan

John Picozzi - @johnpicozzi

Direct download: TalkingDrupal151.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 8:47am EST


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A tricky visit to Fratton Park, but time to deliver

An 11-hour flight from Beijing gave Colin Randall plenty of time to ponder gloomily on Sunderland’s present predicament …

Niall Quinn
has reason to remember Nov 20 1997. It was, if my memory is correct, the last time Sunderland managed to win at Portsmouth and his was the first of four goals in a superb 4-1 victory.

Thirteen years on, Niall has asked fans to show patience and support despite – or perhaps because of – the present appalling run of defeats and draws. And he cannot be faulted for doing so: booing the team as they leave the field after a rotten display is one thing, getting on players’ back from the first misplaced pass is another (especially in our case, given how many misplaced passes we have come to expect).

Players are human and do thrive on the passionate encouragement of the supporters, but the other side of that coin is that they may be made even more prone to sloppy errors or rushed, ineffective use of the ball when conscious of seething hostility from the stands.

That is the only concession I am prepared to make. Steve Bruce has had a lot of money to spend, enough to ensure that the unlucky string of injuries, while inconvenient, should not have stopped us winning a single Premier game since Nov 21.

Someone was saying the other day that he loathes the phrase “must-win game”. I can live with that, since there are no remaining matches this season that need to be described as such. The blunt truth is that we need points from anywhere we can get them.

So each game is as important as the other; we no longer have the luxury of seeing any points at all from, say, Man Utd at home or Liverpool, Arsenal and Villa away, as welcome bonuses. Since we cannot be sure of beating lower league sides at home, and lose consistently to them away, defeatism in the face of encounters with the top six is tantamount to accepting the likelihood of relegation.

Away on holiday in China over the past fortnight, I approached each of the home games – Stoke and Wigan – in a gloomy state of mind. I was grateful in the end that no one was able to suggest a place to watch the Stoke game in Shanghai – a grim prospect at 4am – and the question did not even arise in Chengdu on Saturday, when I had more chance of seeing the returning and now quarantined US-born pandas than catching the Lads on the box.

I had to rely on text messages alerting me to any goals, and the Blackcats list for occasional e-mailed comments from fellow supporters able to follow the games in one way or the other. My phone wasn’t troubled much during either match.

It is not Salut! Sunderland‘s considered view that the time has yet come to question Bruce’s managership, though we suspect the thought may have crossed Ellis Short’s mind as he has watched the team assembled with his money perform so ineffectually in game after game. His top ten target for this season now looks, quite frankly, ludicrous; we are fighting for Premier survival.

And if Pompey tonight ends not with a greatly reassuring victory but more apology and rationalisation from Bruce of underachievement, expect the clamour for dramatic action to grow.

1 thought on “A tricky visit to Fratton Park, but time to deliver”

  1. Steve Bruce may or may not be the right man for the Sunderland job, time will tell potentially with our Premiership credentials not intact. However his handling of the Kenwyn Jones/ Liverpool saga was very poor and the whole episode leaves doubt in your mind. Bruce should have come out catagorically and denied he was for sale, he did not until the transfer window was closed. What message does this send to Jones other than quite clearly had Liverpool put 14m on the table then Jones would have been sold. Bruce like Keane seems to have the ability to isolate and ailienate players and this is probably going some way to explain the dressing room problems and the abysmal performances of late. Our loss to Chelsea under Bruce was as inept as our performance at Everton under Keane the season before. Under Bruce as for Keane it is difficult to spot our game plan and tactics. Everybody can see that we are desperately short in ideas from midfield and that we lack width and players with the ability to get to the by-line. Kean did nothing to solve this and neither has Bruce. The feelings for Bruce to be removed, which I do not agree with at this stage in the season, are manifest of the deep rooted fears of ‘we have seen all this before’ only too often. The Club are in a deep malaise and Bruce is really required at this time to stand up and be counted, however the eminations coming from him and the dressing room do not lead one towards optimisim.

Comments are closed.

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South Atlantic Fishery Management Council

Snapper Grouper Amendment 49

Amendment summary

Purpose of Amendment:  To respond to the latest stock assessment of greater amberjack (SEDAR 59) through consideration of adjustments to Acceptable Biological Catch, catch levels, allocations, and other management measures for greater amberjack, as well as remove recreational annual catch targets (ACT) in the snapper grouper fishery.

Action Summary: Adopt recommended Acceptable Biological Catch, adjust the total Annual Catch Limit and annual Optimum Yield, sector allocations (and sector Annual Catch Limits), consider modifications to minimum size limits, seasonal commercial trip limits, and the April spawning closure, and remove recreational ACT for species managed under the Snapper Grouper Fishery Management Plan.

Key Events:

  • June 2020: Amendment initiated.
  • March 2021: Approved for scoping.
  • April 2021: Scoping hearings were held on April 14 and 15, 2021. Snapper Grouper AP reviewed and made recommendations.
  • March 2022: Council approved for public hearings.
  • April 2022: Snapper Grouper AP reviewed and provided recommendations for preferred alternatives.
  • June 2022: Public hearing held.
  • September 2022: Amendment approved for formal review.

Most recent amendment document

  • Final approval
  • Implementation
  • Pre-scoping
  • Public hearing
  • Rule making
  • Scoping
  • Secretarial review

Public comments

Staff Contact


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If you reside in a building, it is difficult to picture a home without a ceiling. They are necessary for dining areas, bedrooms, and even kitchens. As important as they are, it is to understand the various types and suitability of each room in which they are being installed into. Modular ceilings assist in enclosing and dividing areas, controlling the dispersion of light and sound inside a space, and preventing the transfer of sound across spaces. Having high ceilings gives regular rooms the appearance of being expansive.

Additionally, they offer greater room for décor and often more natural light and ventilation. However, the additional air volume in the room may make it more challenging to heat or cool.

What are Modular Ceilings Made Of?

Modular ceilings are made out of pressed metal tiles that join to a concealed substructure to provide a finished, smooth appearance. The O.R. and the ceiling area above are hermetically sealed by a neoprene gasket that is located between the tiles and the substructure.

This might be the last thing people typically see when they enter a building or room, but indeed it is seen. A modular ceiling will improve the interior design of the space, which determines its aesthetics if you want a ceiling that commands attention while still serving its purpose.

Your modular ceilings may be made to be fire-resistant as well. They are also able to conceal other services like ducts, pipes, and cables; they may also be able to accommodate building utilities like vents, lights, sprinkler heads, and so on.

If you plan to install a modular ceiling, get expert recommendations from Sai Seva Service, a reliable modular ceiling supplier in India. Call +91 8469131313.

Modular False Ceiling

The modular false ceiling can be installed in any place like offices, buildings, and even in rooms. Such ceilings can be customized according to your will and requirements. Besides, you will also experience enhanced soundproofing and easier access to structural parts with brighter rooms.

False ceilings are a further architectural feature that not only enhances the beauty of the space but also increases its energy efficiency. It is a strong yet lightweight plastic that has many uses.

The modular false ceilings are waterproof, more effective, and long-lasting in high-moisture locations like balconies, bathrooms, and basements than gypsum false ceilings.

PVC Laminated Ceiling Panel

Polyvinyl chloride or PVC false ceiling planks are stylish elements for interior spaces. PVC is suitable for both residential and business settings. The planks can be abe included as a wall or a false ceiling cladding material.

PVC laminated ceiling panel is a superior choice due to its extreme strength and durability. Years can pass without the ceiling bowing or warping. PVC ceilings are not fragile like traditional POP ceilings and are not harmed when handled.

The planks can be placed at any angle to curves, horizontally, vertically, diagonally, or across any neighbouring planes. Teak Wood, Pine Wood, and White are just a few designs and colours available on PVC boards.

In both residential and commercial structures, PVC panels are frequently utilized as a cladding material for ceilings. Since it is formed in a factory, the finish is seamless, and it can be created in a variety of shapes, colours, sizes, and lengths. Each PVC panel has a glossy outside and a hollow inside.

The designs and pattern of the modular ceilings are surely going to grab your attention with their superior look. Depending on their intended use, modular false ceilings can come in a variety of forms.

These ceiling tiles utilize diverse materials to offer a variety of purposes. False ceilings can be categorized mostly according to the materials that were employed. Each substance has certain benefits and drawbacks. A mixture of materials can provide both practical and aesthetically pleasing characteristics.


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Halal Industry

NoorVitamins provides free Vitamin C supplements during COVID pandemic

NEW YORK, May 20, 2020 -- Emergency medicine doctor Gamal Mohamed, called on personal contacts at a New York based vitamin company, NoorVitamins, to formulate a Vitamin C supplement due to shortage during COVID pandemic. Noor responds with making the vitamin c and giving away 100,000 doses for free. Follow the link to receive your free supplement.

Responding to a need

Serving on the front line, Dr. Gamal Mohamed, an emergency medicine resident physician at Robert Wood Johnson in in New Jersey, has seen the impact of Covid-19 in one of the hardest hit locations in the country. In addition to caring for patients, he reached out to NoorVitamins, a company where he had a summer internship during his pre-medical education and encouraged them to formulate a vitamin c supplement. "While Vitamin C is not a cure, it can't hurt to do whatever possible to support immune health during this time" said Dr. Mohamed.

There has been a shortage of vitamin c on many pharmacy shelves and even price gouging when looking to buy the product online. "Many patients couldn't get vitamin C and I knew the Noor executive team personally, so I thought to ask them to help" added Dr. Mohamed.

NoorVitamins responded with not only making the Vitamin C supplement, but also giving it away for free.

"We're inspired by Dr. Mohamed and other front-line worker's efforts. He reminded us that we all have a role to play in getting our communities through this momentous time in history. This is our way of doing our part." Said Dr. Issa, President of NoorVitamins.

The vitamin C supplement will be free of charge on www.noorvitamins.com, customers will only pay for shipping if looking to get this product alone.

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